TOTALLY GEEKED!

NAOW · Vette's SS

Mental Health

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Is this something new for him? Or is this an ongoing thing?

NAOW · Vette's SS

It started a few weeks ago.

-- Edited by NAOW on Wednesday 11th of March 2015 10:10:35 PM

Fort Worth Mom · Mod/Penguin lover/Princess!

NAOW wrote:
I could use some insight or advice. DH's brother (BIL1) is having some issues and I'm not sure if we should get involved or not. I guess he thinks the police are after him. I'm not sure if he hears voices or is delusional or what, but he thinks that he has been attacked, is being followed, etc. by the police. He talks about how he is trying to save up to hire a lawyer to sue them for police brutality. He has not had any run ins with the police. We have heard most of this second hand from his other brother and mom, but he has been mentioning his problems with the cops in his text conversations with DH. DH is trying to convince him to see a doctor but BIL says he is trying to save his money for the lawyer. DH tried playing into it and said that a lawyer is going to need to see evidence of his injuries and he should go to help his case, but so far nothing. DH is thinking we should pay for him to go, but then I think we need to go with him and talk to the Dr.
It doesn't seem like other BIL or MIL are all that concerned about this. They talk about it like he's crazy, but don't seem to do much more than that.
I don't know how to go about this. Or if it's even any of my business.

Jeez, you have two kids. Of course you should be concerned.

If you don't know how to shoot a gun........learn. Quick.

And don't let this guy, come into your house. No way, no how. cry

Your BIL is off the rails.

Crazy.

Stay far away.

JMHO.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

That sounds concerning. So he was totally normal before but now having paranoid issues? Has he been to a doctor lately?Do u suspect any drug use?

NAOW · Vette's SS

Yea, he seems to be doing really well other than this. He was working a steady job and saving up to go back to school. He got laid off a few months ago and had a hard time finding another job, but started a new one a few days ago. He was, and still is, living on his own. (He is 27 but up until about 2 years ago he lived with his mom. He had dropped out of HS and had some trouble with the law in his late teens, but got his GED and seems to be working to better his life)

I don't know when he went to the doctor last. DH is still trying to convince him to go.

Drug use is a possibility, that is what he got in trouble with years ago (pot), but I don't really think that is it this time.

NAOW · Vette's SS

Fort Worth Mom wrote:
NAOW wrote:
I could use some insight or advice. DH's brother (BIL1) is having some issues and I'm not sure if we should get involved or not. I guess he thinks the police are after him. I'm not sure if he hears voices or is delusional or what, but he thinks that he has been attacked, is being followed, etc. by the police. He talks about how he is trying to save up to hire a lawyer to sue them for police brutality. He has not had any run ins with the police. We have heard most of this second hand from his other brother and mom, but he has been mentioning his problems with the cops in his text conversations with DH. DH is trying to convince him to see a doctor but BIL says he is trying to save his money for the lawyer. DH tried playing into it and said that a lawyer is going to need to see evidence of his injuries and he should go to help his case, but so far nothing. DH is thinking we should pay for him to go, but then I think we need to go with him and talk to the Dr.
It doesn't seem like other BIL or MIL are all that concerned about this. They talk about it like he's crazy, but don't seem to do much more than that.
I don't know how to go about this. Or if it's even any of my business.

Jeez, you have two kids. Of course you should be concerned.
If you don't know how to shoot a gun........learn. Quick.
And don't let this guy, come into your house. No way, no how.
Your BIL is off the rails.
Crazy.
Stay far away.
JMHO.

Well, yea, I know that :)

I am more asking how to help him?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

If your DH can get him to a Doctor or counselor then at least that is a place to start.

NAOW · Vette's SS

He is working on it.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I think u can both just go together andsay "we care about u and arw concerned" and then explain why.

Fort Worth Mom · Mod/Penguin lover/Princess!

NAOW wrote:
Fort Worth Mom wrote:
NAOW wrote:
I could use some insight or advice. DH's brother (BIL1) is having some issues and I'm not sure if we should get involved or not. I guess he thinks the police are after him. I'm not sure if he hears voices or is delusional or what, but he thinks that he has been attacked, is being followed, etc. by the police. He talks about how he is trying to save up to hire a lawyer to sue them for police brutality. He has not had any run ins with the police. We have heard most of this second hand from his other brother and mom, but he has been mentioning his problems with the cops in his text conversations with DH. DH is trying to convince him to see a doctor but BIL says he is trying to save his money for the lawyer. DH tried playing into it and said that a lawyer is going to need to see evidence of his injuries and he should go to help his case, but so far nothing. DH is thinking we should pay for him to go, but then I think we need to go with him and talk to the Dr.
It doesn't seem like other BIL or MIL are all that concerned about this. They talk about it like he's crazy, but don't seem to do much more than that.
I don't know how to go about this. Or if it's even any of my business.

Jeez, you have two kids. Of course you should be concerned.
If you don't know how to shoot a gun........learn. Quick.
And don't let this guy, come into your house. No way, no how.
Your BIL is off the rails.
Crazy.
Stay far away.
JMHO.
Well, yea, I know that :)
I am more asking how to help him?

If he can't see that he needs help, there is nothing you can do, NAOW.

He has to hit rock bottom. And want to drag himself out.

Until he reaches this conclusion, stay away from him.

Keep him away from your children.

JMHO.

NAOW · Vette's SS

Fort Worth Mom wrote:
NAOW wrote:
Fort Worth Mom wrote:
NAOW wrote:
I could use some insight or advice. DH's brother (BIL1) is having some issues and I'm not sure if we should get involved or not. I guess he thinks the police are after him. I'm not sure if he hears voices or is delusional or what, but he thinks that he has been attacked, is being followed, etc. by the police. He talks about how he is trying to save up to hire a lawyer to sue them for police brutality. He has not had any run ins with the police. We have heard most of this second hand from his other brother and mom, but he has been mentioning his problems with the cops in his text conversations with DH. DH is trying to convince him to see a doctor but BIL says he is trying to save his money for the lawyer. DH tried playing into it and said that a lawyer is going to need to see evidence of his injuries and he should go to help his case, but so far nothing. DH is thinking we should pay for him to go, but then I think we need to go with him and talk to the Dr.
It doesn't seem like other BIL or MIL are all that concerned about this. They talk about it like he's crazy, but don't seem to do much more than that.
I don't know how to go about this. Or if it's even any of my business.

Jeez, you have two kids. Of course you should be concerned.
If you don't know how to shoot a gun........learn. Quick.
And don't let this guy, come into your house. No way, no how.
Your BIL is off the rails.
Crazy.
Stay far away.
JMHO.
Well, yea, I know that :)
I am more asking how to help him?
If he can't see that he needs help, there is nothing you can do, NAOW.
He has to hit rock bottom. And want to drag himself out.
Until he reaches this conclusion, stay away from him.
Keep him away from your children.
JMHO.

Even if it's a mental issue? He doesn't seem to realize that it isn't real.

ETA: I am sincerely asking. I don't have any experience with this type of thing.

-- Edited by NAOW on Wednesday 11th of March 2015 10:41:03 PM

NAOW · Vette's SS

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I think u can both just go together andsay "we care about u and arw concerned" and then explain why.

That is what we are talking about doing. But it will probably be just DH who goes with him.

burns07 · Guru

for your own safety would check with the cops yourself--erratic behaviour like you describe, out of the blue, is very typical of post-offense behaviour--perhaps he HAS done something that you and the cops are not aware of--would also decide for yourself if he's capable of violence--in any case, agree--would do well to keep your children away from him

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

NAOW, just a thought. If you feel like he's a danger to himself or others you can have him committed for 72 hours. That might give them the time to get to the root of the problem.

karl271 · Guru

Had a great uncle who became convinced the Ku Klux Klan was after him. Do not know why; he was pure Norwegian, Protestant, etc. Anyway, he obsessed on this and finally moved out to North Dakota, bought a small acreage and raised horses until he died 25 years later. As far as I know he was never a danger to anyone; just completely convinced he had to escape the KKK.
Guess I am trying to say that just because BIL is paranoid on one subject does not mean he is a danger to you or your children, etc. Watch and see how this plays out. I seriously doubt he will consider seeing anyone for consoling.

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

He may have had some type of neurological episode Such as a small stroke. Please get him help.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Southern_Belle wrote:
He may have had some type of neurological episode Such as a small stroke. Please get him help.

This was my thought. Given the ACA he must have insurance. Get him to a doctor.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Southern_Belle wrote:
He may have had some type of neurological episode Such as a small stroke. Please get him help.

This is what I was thinking. If this is a sudden change in behavior, he might have a brain tumor or something.

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

So true LL. Years ago my ex had a fellow Marine who had a sudden change of behavior. His personality was so different. He started getting in trouble at work. His wife kept begging the command to help him. She knew something was wrong. They tried kicking him out of the Corps. Finally they sent him for an exam. He had a brain tumor. He had a 14 hour surgery to remove it and was back to his old self within hours.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

NAOW wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I think u can both just go together andsay "we care about u and arw concerned" and then explain why.
That is what we are talking about doing. But it will probably be just DH who goes with him.

Sorry for the spelling, lol. I was on my phone and I took out my contact so I cannot see out of my one eye when my contact is out.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Yes, obviously the first route is to get a medical exam to rule out medical issues or problems. So, you should be able to get him in quickly for that, especially for a sudden change in personality type symptoms. If that isn't the issue, I would wonder if he is using drugs that is setting up the paranoia issue. Have you seen him where you thought he was intoxicated from drugs? Does he have drug paraphernalia in his house, etc. And, if he recently lost a job he may be depressed and have too much time on his hands leading to drug use, etc. And, then there is the possibility of mental health issues such as schizophrenia or other issues which often don't present until young adulthood.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Oh, NAOW, how terrible!

It sounds like the other family members are in denial, so it's fortunate that you and your husband are concerned.

Good luck getting him to a doctor.

flan

NAOW · Vette's SS

He is a really nice guy and no, I don't think he is a danger to me or my family (but for the time being I am not going to see him JIC).

Burns, I will call and see what they say, thank you.

NJN, I am not sure they will commit him but that is what I am looking into.

SB, that is another concern, so I think going to the doctor first is a good idea, even if just to rule it out.

LGS, yes I do think he was depressed after losing his job, but I haven't noticed any drug use. He used to drink a lot, but I don't think he does anymore.

NAOW · Vette's SS

I'm not sure how to get him to a doctor without insurance. Can I just have him go to Urgent Care?

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

Awe, NAOW, I wish I had some advice for you, but it looks like every possibility has already been covered.

And, I agree, he needs to be seen by a doctor to rule out TIA or a tumor.

Good luck and will say a prayer for you and your family.

NAOW · Vette's SS

Thanks Czech

Honeys_Mom · Mod & Permanent Board Sweetheart

Saying a prayer for you and your family also, NAOW.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

NAOW wrote:
I'm not sure how to get him to a doctor without insurance. Can I just have him go to Urgent Care?

Did he continue with COBRA from his previous job? He may still be insured. If not, there are free clinics if you look around.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

NAOW wrote:
He is a really nice guy and no, I don't think he is a danger to me or my family (but for the time being I am not going to see him JIC).

Burns, I will call and see what they say, thank you.

NJN, I am not sure they will commit him but that is what I am looking into.

SB, that is another concern, so I think going to the doctor first is a good idea, even if just to rule it out.

LGS, yes I do think he was depressed after losing his job, but I haven't noticed any drug use. He used to drink a lot, but I don't think he does anymore.

Ok, I didn't mean to imply anything. Just that one needs to consider all the possibilities.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

NAOW wrote:
I'm not sure how to get him to a doctor without insurance. Can I just have him go to Urgent Care?

So he didn't sign up for ACA? Ok, well he may still be eligible for free care. I don't know. I think there is still and open Window for ACA sign ups, depending on the state he lives in. Get on that now. If he is out of work, he would qualify for some sort of care. but even if he isn't covered he needs to see a doctor immediately.