TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Dear Abby: Sister Wants Family to Go on Expensive Vacation

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

This letter could have been written by me, different circumstances, but similar. My sis wants to bring mom on a European River Cruise. Would I like to go? Of course, but I can't, I won't have the vaca time saved up (new job), it is very costly, about 6K / person, and I would have to hire a babysitter for DD who will be in school, and pay for kenneling the dog. I can't do it and my sister laid in about how this could be the last time we are all together with Mom, blah blah blah. She is being unreasonable and pretty much throwing a tantrum. None of my other 3 siblings can go either, various reasons.

LW's sister is selfish, wanting to do things her way. Anyone else's finances is none of her business.

sweet tooth · Member

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
This letter could have been written by me, different circumstances, but similar. My sis wants to bring mom on a European River Cruise. Would I like to go? Of course, but I can't, I won't have the vaca time saved up (new job), it is very costly, about 6K / person, and I would have to hire a babysitter for DD who will be in school, and pay for kenneling the dog. I can't do it and my sister laid in about how this could be the last time we are all together with Mom, blah blah blah. She is being unreasonable and pretty much throwing a tantrum. None of my other 3 siblings can go either, various reasons.

LW's sister is selfish, wanting to do things her way. Anyone else's finances is none of her business.

I don't get people like this. It never even occurred to me to make decisions about how other people should spend their money.

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

If I suggested a family vacation I'd make sure it suited everyone's situation. Some people are just selfish.

FNW · Guru

Sometimes bigger isn't always better. A lot of fun can be had closer (and cheaper) to home.

This year, because of our pool installation and the uncertainty of when it will be completed, we decided to forego a vacay. Perhaps we'll take a long weekend after school starts in the fall or even winter, but we'll decide then. This summer, we'll hang around and take day trips here and there and soak up the culture around us. Yesterday, for instance, we took a tour of the U.S. Capitol. We brought my parents with us. It was a wonderful day and we'll have those memories forever. And all it cost was gas and time.

ed11563 · Guru

Southern_Belle wrote:
If I suggested a family vacation I'd make sure it suited everyone's situation. Some people are just selfish.

I would call pressuring someone to do this "bullying".

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Southern_Belle wrote:
If I suggested a family vacation I'd make sure it suited everyone's situation. Some people are just selfish.

Renting a large beach house or a bunch of cabins by a lake would work, or rent out cottages near our family cottage so there is room for everyone and we can all drive there and not have to eat out all the time.BUT the plans have to be agreed upon by everyone.

My sis is the oldest of the 5 siblings and was used to planning vacas for her and I, her and one of my bro's, etc. Those vacas were great. There were good because she would tell us what vaca she was planning an invited us to go if we could. That type of planning was great but you don't demand people do an outrageously priced vaca and one that is 2 weeks long and just expect them to be sheep in a herd.

Divine Geek · Guru

ed11563 wrote:
Southern_Belle wrote:
If I suggested a family vacation I'd make sure it suited everyone's situation. Some people are just selfish.
I would call pressuring someone to do this "bullying".

It's not bullying. It's just being a jerk

huskerbb · Guru

I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

ed11563 wrote:
Southern_Belle wrote:
If I suggested a family vacation I'd make sure it suited everyone's situation. Some people are just selfish.
I would call pressuring someone to do this "bullying".

It is not bullying. That's the problem with that word - people overuse it like crazy.

huskerbb · Guru

Also, instead of whining about it--the LW could actually, you know, come up with some useful suggestions of where to go that might be cheaper.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.

Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Also, instead of whining about it--the LW could actually, you know, come up with some useful suggestions of where to go that might be cheaper.

Why? The vacation wasn't her idea, it is being pushed on her. She should be able to say "no" and have that be the end of it.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.

That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Also, instead of whining about it--the LW could actually, you know, come up with some useful suggestions of where to go that might be cheaper.
Why? The vacation wasn't her idea, it is being pushed on her. She should be able to say "no" and have that be the end of it.

She doesn't say she doesn't want to go at all--she just says she can't afford the one her sister picked.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?

Then she is being responsible by not going on expensive vacations that would make it worse.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Then she is being responsible by not going on expensive vacations that would make it worse.

No one said she should go on that vacation.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Then she is being responsible by not going on expensive vacations that would make it worse.
No one said she should go on that vacation.

And no one should be pressuring her to.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?

Husker, the high mortgage payment could be part of a grand financial health plan. Such as they refinanced to a low interest rate for say 10 years, making their payment pretty large but it means that at some point long before retirement they will own their home free and clear. The family may be positioning themselves to be financially comfortable in the near future and expensive vacas do not play into that plan.

FNW · Guru

I'm not sure why some people need Abby to bless their decisions.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Then she is being responsible by not going on expensive vacations that would make it worse.
No one said she should go on that vacation.
And no one should be pressuring her to.

You can't control what other people do. "should be" or "should not be" is pretty much irrelevant. Deal with what IS.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

My family used to do this. They would plan really expensive vacations knowing I was single and had three kids. I couldn't afford the things they could. But they would always try to make me feel bad for not going.

huskerbb · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Husker, the high mortgage payment could be part of a grand financial health plan. Such as they refinanced to a low interest rate for say 10 years, making their payment pretty large but it means that at some point long before retirement they will own their home free and clear. The family may be positioning themselves to be financially comfortable in the near future and expensive vacas do not play into that plan.

Probably not the best move since 30 year rates are at all time lows. You'd be better off refinancing for 30 years at, say, 4% or whatever, then if you have disposable income left over, invest that in the stock market.

My buddy has been making 12% since 2009 doing that. You'd have a net GAIN on your money of 8% per annum. Much smarter.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Then she is being responsible by not going on expensive vacations that would make it worse.
No one said she should go on that vacation.
And no one should be pressuring her to.
You can't control what other people do. "should be" or "should not be" is pretty much irrelevant. Deal with what IS.

That goes both ways. Questioning her decision from 2 years ago does no good now.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

huskerbb wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
Some people prefer to spend their money on what will affect them everyday and don't care that it will affect vacations, etc. They wanted that house for a reason - it is nobody else's business. Maybe they are homebodies and that's what they WANT.
That's all fine and dandy--if you can afford it. It sounds like they are barely able to do so.

This gets thrown in my face all the time--what if someone loses a job, or has big medical bills?
Husker, the high mortgage payment could be part of a grand financial health plan. Such as they refinanced to a low interest rate for say 10 years, making their payment pretty large but it means that at some point long before retirement they will own their home free and clear. The family may be positioning themselves to be financially comfortable in the near future and expensive vacas do not play into that plan.
Probably not the best move since 30 year rates are at all time lows. You'd be better off refinancing for 30 years at, say, 4% or whatever, then if you have disposable income left over, invest that in the stock market.

My buddy has been making 12% since 2009 doing that. You'd have a net GAIN on your money of 8% per annum. Much smarter.

And that works for some people, for others, they just don't want debt. It's a personal decision. Perhaps they know their jobs are going to go away in a few years and so will have to start over and so paying off that mortgage sooner will allow them to stay in their house, in their neighborhood. Like I said, everyone has different ways of doing things with their finances. Point is, they do not want to spend the money on a pricey vaca, they are smart about their money. Sister is out of line.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

And instead of assuming they purchased a house with big square footage or extra rooms, consider that maybe housing prices in their area may be astronomical and buying a house is a long term investment for them which will get them equity vs renting. You can't just assume that they bought a big house - it might be on the small side, but is a better overall financial decision.

It's also possible that they know their income will increase in the next few years, alleviating the financial stress. Maybe one of them is a grad student, maybe one is a lawyer in a law firm and will be made partner in the next few years, maybe one of them is a doctor in their final year of training...there are a lot of reasons why buying the house makes sense at a temporary financial squeeze.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I agree MM. Sometimes we just assume people are being fiscally irresponsible. Not always the case.

Momala · Great cook-happy wife-superb fisherman

A. Were LW's parents ill 2 years ago? No/unknown
B. Did Vacationing Sis know about the financial situation 2 years ago? Probably
C. Did Vacationing Sis offer to help pay for LW's family to join them? Probably not
D. Is Vacationing Sis being a jerk? Absolutely!
E. What do the parents want?
F. Has Vacationing Sis even considered a local vacation?
G. Will LW be in a better financial position in the foreseeable future? Probably
H. Is Vactioning Sis looking after the best interests of her parents? No, not if LW can't join the trip.

huskerbb · Guru

Momala wrote:
A. Were LW's parents ill 2 years ago? No/unknown
B. Did Vacationing Sis know about the financial situation 2 years ago? Probably
C. Did Vacationing Sis offer to help pay for LW's family to join them? Probably not
D. Is Vacationing Sis being a jerk? Absolutely!
E. What do the parents want?
F. Has Vacationing Sis even considered a local vacation?
G. Will LW be in a better financial position in the foreseeable future? Probably
H. Is Vactioning Sis looking after the best interests of her parents? No, not if LW can't join the trip.

I agree up until the last one. While sis has no right to complain if the LW can't or won't go, the LW would not be any more "in line" to complain if sis takes the parents on said vacation without her. The LW doesn't have to go, but if she chooses not to, she has no right to complain they didn't include her, either.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Mellow Momma wrote:
And instead of assuming they purchased a house with big square footage or extra rooms, consider that maybe housing prices in their area may be astronomical and buying a house is a long term investment for them which will get them equity vs renting. You can't just assume that they bought a big house - it might be on the small side, but is a better overall financial decision.

It's also possible that they know their income will increase in the next few years, alleviating the financial stress. Maybe one of them is a grad student, maybe one is a lawyer in a law firm and will be made partner in the next few years, maybe one of them is a doctor in their final year of training...there are a lot of reasons why buying the house makes sense at a temporary financial squeeze.

The LW signed it Frustrated in British Columbia. Real estate is crazy expensive there.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I am always amazed at the number of adults who think they get to control or plan the lives of others. You say No.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
And instead of assuming they purchased a house with big square footage or extra rooms, consider that maybe housing prices in their area may be astronomical and buying a house is a long term investment for them which will get them equity vs renting. You can't just assume that they bought a big house - it might be on the small side, but is a better overall financial decision.

It's also possible that they know their income will increase in the next few years, alleviating the financial stress. Maybe one of them is a grad student, maybe one is a lawyer in a law firm and will be made partner in the next few years, maybe one of them is a doctor in their final year of training...there are a lot of reasons why buying the house makes sense at a temporary financial squeeze.

What do the reasons WHY matter one way or the other? I don't feel like I have to justify what I choose or choose not to do with my money to anyone, even my sister.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Also, instead of whining about it--the LW could actually, you know, come up with some useful suggestions of where to go that might be cheaper.

That's true too. How about, let's go spend a weekend at a local or less expensive place and name it. And, they might want to or not. You can offer it.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Also, instead of whining about it--the LW could actually, you know, come up with some useful suggestions of where to go that might be cheaper.
That's true too. How about, let's go spend a weekend at a local or less expensive place and name it. And, they might want to or not. You can offer it.

She should have but is probably so frustrated with a life long memory of the sibling trying to control her so just is on the edge of bursting. Just my guess.

Ilumine · Regular

huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.

I can immediately think of three reasons why people buy more expensive houses.

1) Better schools mean more expensive houses.

2) Closer location to work.

3) Trading higher mortgage for living in a city to not have a car payment or pay for parking if one works in the city.

NONE of these reasons have anything to do with square footage, nor are they frivolous decisions.

One has to wonder why YOU immediately go the worse case scenario on these threads?

huskerbb · Guru

Ilumine wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
I can immediately think of three reasons why people buy more expensive houses.
1) Better schools mean more expensive houses.
2) Closer location to work.
3) Trading higher mortgage for living in a city to not have a car payment or pay for parking if one works in the city.
NONE of these reasons have anything to do with square footage, nor are they frivolous decisions.
One has to wonder why YOU immediately go the worse case scenario on these threads?

I'm almost always right.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

huskerbb wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
I can immediately think of three reasons why people buy more expensive houses.
1) Better schools mean more expensive houses.
2) Closer location to work.
3) Trading higher mortgage for living in a city to not have a car payment or pay for parking if one works in the city.
NONE of these reasons have anything to do with square footage, nor are they frivolous decisions.
One has to wonder why YOU immediately go the worse case scenario on these threads?
I'm almost always right.

in your mind maybe, even that is questionable.

Tignanello · My dog name is, Sasha!

huskerbb wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
I can immediately think of three reasons why people buy more expensive houses.
1) Better schools mean more expensive houses.
2) Closer location to work.
3) Trading higher mortgage for living in a city to not have a car payment or pay for parking if one works in the city.
NONE of these reasons have anything to do with square footage, nor are they frivolous decisions.
One has to wonder why YOU immediately go the worse case scenario on these threads?
I'm almost always right.

I would add sacrificing for 5 years in order to be debt free after that. My aunt and uncle paid off their house in under 5 and now live debt free in their early 60s but they were paying every dime they had towards that mortgage with no extras during that 5 years.

burns07 · Guru

paying-off debt is saving money--refinancing mortgages to shorten the term is smart--especially when the delta on the rate shifts the bulk of the payment to principal

taking on new debt sort of depends on the purpose--a personal residence is not normally an earning asset--appreciation is possible, true, but you have to carry the place in the meantime

guess it depends on their situation

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

The problem I have with the OP in the FIRST place is she starts by feeling like she has to JUSTIFY why she doesn't want to go. You don't have to JUSTIFY your finances to other people. I don't explain. If I WANT to spend my money on something, I will. If I dont' want to, it really doesn't matter why does it? You dont' have to get permission from people to live your life the way you want too. If you don't pay my bills, then how I spend or save is NONE of your business!

huskerbb · Guru

Tignanello wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I don't disagree--but--this is a definite pitfall of enslaving yourself to a mortgage payment you can barely afford as it is.

Sure, we all have to make our own choices, but really, in the end, how big of a house do you really need?

Again, the mortgage is a reality and the sister harping about it won't change that fact, but I think people need to think long and hard about the sacrifices they have to make to add some square footage or whatever.

Vacation or not, it sounds like they bit off about as much as they can chew.
I can immediately think of three reasons why people buy more expensive houses.
1) Better schools mean more expensive houses.
2) Closer location to work.
3) Trading higher mortgage for living in a city to not have a car payment or pay for parking if one works in the city.
NONE of these reasons have anything to do with square footage, nor are they frivolous decisions.
One has to wonder why YOU immediately go the worse case scenario on these threads?
I'm almost always right.
I would add sacrificing for 5 years in order to be debt free after that. My aunt and uncle paid off their house in under 5 and now live debt free in their early 60s but they were paying every dime they had towards that mortgage with no extras during that 5 years.

Meh. You can't take it with you. What's the point of saving every dime for when you are old? I'd rather travel and do things now when I'm young and relatively healthy. You might not have the chance later.

huskerbb · Guru

Heck, my mom has more money than she knows what to do with,now. But her husband is gone. I know she would have liked to do more traveling when they could have gone together--now it's too late.

FNW · Guru

I can't say that I have ever said, "gee, I wish I hadn't spent my money on that trip."

huskerbb · Guru

FNW wrote:
I can't say that I have ever said, "gee, I wish I hadn't spent my money on that trip."

Me, either.

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
FNW wrote:
I can't say that I have ever said, "gee, I wish I hadn't spent my money on that trip."
Me, either.

I can. More than once...

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
FNW wrote:
I can't say that I have ever said, "gee, I wish I hadn't spent my money on that trip."
Me, either.
I can. More than once...

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that!

flan

-- Edited by flan327 on Wednesday 24th of June 2015 11:09:56 AM

FNW · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
FNW wrote:
I can't say that I have ever said, "gee, I wish I hadn't spent my money on that trip."
Me, either.
I can. More than once...

Well, I should say I never said that about trips I took with Mr. FNW that didn't involve his family, or trips I took that didn't involve my ex.

Ohfour · Hooker

LOL, right!

Now ANYWHERE I've gone with G would have been worth twice what we paid. We really have great vacations.

And to make it even better, most of them are paid for. So that takes them to a whole nother level... biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
LOL, right!

Now ANYWHERE I've gone with G would have been worth twice what we paid. We really have great vacations.

And to make it even better, most of them are paid for. So that takes them to a whole nother level...

And NOW you're just bragging!

flan