TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Dear Abby: Is it Wrong to Hitch a Ride

FNW · Guru

While I don't think it rude, I would ask myself how often this need might occur. Once or twice, okay. But I suspect this would be a regular basis. And that would be an imposition, IMO.

Some people would not mind. Some would. Perhaps the son knows the friends better and knows they would not appreciate being asked.

Personally, my boys went to a camp this summer that let out at 4 every day. It lasted 4 days. When I signed them up for it, I planned to leave work early every day to pick them up. If I could not do this, I would not have signed them up. But I was taught to be responsible.

I have "back-up plans" with a couple of my neighbors, where we agree to look after each others' children if an emergency comes up and we cannot get to the bus stop on time. So far I haven't needed to utilize the plan, but I have looked after another's children for a few minutes until their mother could get back. I am glad to do it, but again, this situation hasn't been abused.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

It seemed my mom routinely was driving around other kids back in the day. I don't mind driving their friends around at all. And, I guess I would think other mothers would be glad to do the same if it was a friend and you didn't live that far apart or out of the way. But, nowadays, everyone is pretty offended at everything, so maybe he's right.

ed11563 · Guru

Perhaps the son knows that the other parent is a lousy driver, or the other parent creeps him out. Or drives drunk.

Or the other kid creeps him out. Might not be friends so much as acquaintances, okay for limited exposure but not more.

Abby noted correctly that "hitch" generally means soliciting a ride from a random stranger.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

The kid is 15. Why can't he wait at the school doing homework or something until his parents can get there?

FNW · Guru

My guess is after the class is over, school closes and kids must be picked up.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

FNW wrote:
My guess is after the class is over, school closes and kids must be picked up.

I would think a high school would have all sorts of activities and practices going on into the evening.

I also don't see the big deal with asking to ride home with the other kid.

NAOW · Vette's SS

I don't think it is rude at all. It's not out of their way at all. I do think if she can offer to do rides in the morning or something that would be nice.

I would have no problem if someone asked me for this favor.

huskerbb · Guru

Well, son, you can ask your friend if you can get a ride home--or you can walk your butt home.

FNW · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Well, son, you can ask your friend if you can get a ride home--or you can walk your butt home.

Perhaps they live in an area where walking is prohibited or dangerous?

Growing up, we lived a mile from school. It was a straight shot, with two busy roads in between. Crossing guards were at each busy road, and sidewalks lined the streets. I loved walking home. DH walked to/from school with his sister. They received permission from neighbors to cut through their yards to get to school.

We live off a two lane "country" road with dips and curves. No sidewalks, and no place to walk or ride a bike. It would be incredibly stupid for anyone to walk or ride a bike on it. The kids in our neighborhood will never be able to "walk to school", no matter what school they attend, the closest of which is 3 miles away with no "yards" they could cut through.

NAOW · Vette's SS

Double post

-- Edited by NAOW on Thursday 30th of July 2015 10:28:55 AM

NAOW · Vette's SS

Yea, there's no way my kids will be able to walk to school either. We are three miles away too, and they'd be walking on the highway.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lexxy wrote:
This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.

They actually might not like each other at all.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

That's what I was thinking. They don't like each other. Is the other kid an upper classman?

The high schools around here are busy until dark or longer. The office may be closed but there is always something going on.

But yeah, I've seen kids sitting on the steps in the dark waiting for parents.

I don't see the big deal in car pooling. If it's just up the street, it's not like it is out of the way.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.
They actually might not like each other at all.

Yeah, that's what I think too. He probably doesnt' want to be friends with him.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I don't see the big deal and I would do it in a heartbeat if I was already going to pick up my child. If the other child lived fairly close I'd probably even drop them at their house. Not a big deal. I would probably offer gas money and then they would decline. I think after the lessons or whatever are over I'd get them a nice thank you gift. This just isn't a big deal to me.

Our school closes at a certain time and all the kids are asked to leave the property. Not sure how Whataburger feels about that because that's across the street so they all walk over there.

huskerbb · Guru

NAOW wrote:
Yea, there's no way my kids will be able to walk to school either. We are three miles away too, and they'd be walking on the highway.

Then he probably better ask his friend for a lift.

huskerbb · Guru

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.
They actually might not like each other at all.
Yeah, that's what I think too. He probably doesnt' want to be friends with him.

Maybe--but I don't see that as particularly relevant. A few minutes in a car isn't going to hurt anyone. It's not different than riding a bus. You don't have to be friends with everyone on it.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.
They actually might not like each other at all.
Yeah, that's what I think too. He probably doesnt' want to be friends with him.
Maybe--but I don't see that as particularly relevant. A few minutes in a car isn't going to hurt anyone. It's not different than riding a bus. You don't have to be friends with everyone on it.

I agree. And, if he wants to do this activity, then Mom needs to say "if you want to do this activity, then fine, but you will have to ride with Johnny. So, it's up to you, yes or no". If not, then fine, you don't get to do that because I work and can't pick you up. You don't always have to get your kid's permission.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

FNW wrote:
While I don't think it rude, I would ask myself how often this need might occur. Once or twice, okay. But I suspect this would be a regular basis. And that would be an imposition, IMO.

Some people would not mind. Some would. Perhaps the son knows the friends better and knows they would not appreciate being asked.

Personally, my boys went to a camp this summer that let out at 4 every day. It lasted 4 days. When I signed them up for it, I planned to leave work early every day to pick them up. If I could not do this, I would not have signed them up. But I was taught to be responsible.

I have "back-up plans" with a couple of my neighbors, where we agree to look after each others' children if an emergency comes up and we cannot get to the bus stop on time. So far I haven't needed to utilize the plan, but I have looked after another's children for a few minutes until their mother could get back. I am glad to do it, but again, this situation hasn't been abused.

I can't ever plan to leave work early. I don't know what time I will get out on any given day. Fortunately, DH has regular hours and I my mom was alive and lived nearby when my kids were young. Now, they are older and my oldest has his own car so it has gotten a bit easier.

huskerbb · Guru

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
This seems weird to me. We got rides from friends parents & my parents also drove friends home. I'm guessing they aren't so much friends as neighbors & classmates.
They actually might not like each other at all.
Yeah, that's what I think too. He probably doesnt' want to be friends with him.
Maybe--but I don't see that as particularly relevant. A few minutes in a car isn't going to hurt anyone. It's not different than riding a bus. You don't have to be friends with everyone on it.
I agree. And, if he wants to do this activity, then Mom needs to say "if you want to do this activity, then fine, but you will have to ride with Johnny. So, it's up to you, yes or no". If not, then fine, you don't get to do that because I work and can't pick you up. You don't always have to get your kid's permission.

IF he has some LEGITIMATE reason that he doesn't want to ride with them (and not this "rude" nonsense)--then he needs to tell mom.

Whenitrains · Member

And suppose the other boy and/or parent do not want to give him a lift home?

huskerbb · Guru

Whenitrains wrote:
And suppose the other boy and/or parent do not want to give him a lift home?

Then that is a bridge they would have to cross at that time--but they don't know that to be the case. It's silly to speculate on that until they at least know one way or another.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Jesus isn't this what neighbors do for each other?! They live down the street, they aren't making a special trip, they are just putting an extra butt in the seat. What's the big deal?! We did this all the time growing up, my kids did it too. What am I missing here?!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I don't know eithet. Times have changed. Jeepers everything is made so difficult.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Mellow Momma wrote:
Jesus isn't this what neighbors do for each other?! They live down the street, they aren't making a special trip, they are just putting an extra butt in the seat. What's the big deal?! We did this all the time growing up, my kids did it too. What am I missing here?!

No idea. Seems quite simple to me.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Mellow Momma wrote:
Jesus isn't this what neighbors do for each other?! They live down the street, they aren't making a special trip, they are just putting an extra butt in the seat. What's the big deal?! We did this all the time growing up, my kids did it too. What am I missing here?!

You know - I agree. But neighbors are not the same as they used to be. Our new nieghbor hasn't said boo to us. And apparently, she has a daughter Baby J's age - but I've yet to see that child outside. And I think they go to the same school and everything. Now, we've met the nieghbors down the street while walking the dog, and they are all very nice.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Yes. People around here rarely come out of their houses or neighbor anymore. Not like when I was a kid.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

I had other moms at DD's school who didn't live near us that I could count on to take her home to their house if I couldn't be there and gave them a quick call or text. Every working mom has a few "backup moms" they can count on to help them out in an emergency. It's just the way we all got through the day. The moms I counted on were rarely needed, but when they were they stepped up! There were things I could do for them, like be off on random weekdays and help out with school functions, and there were things they did for me. Like I said, we didn't even live near each other but our kids went to school together.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

It may not be the mom's. SS rarely goes out. We have a family two doors down with six kids. Two of the boys are his age. One a year older and the next a year younger. He would much prefer to hole up reading than play.