TOTALLY GEEKED!

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

---

Advice is spot on.

---

 Yep.  I think so, too. 

---

No it isn't.  How is her having an ex make a difference to the venue?  It's ONLY an issue if he acts unprofessionally--which he has not done to date.

 

Plus, you are a lawyer. You know darn well that she doesn't have a legal leg to stand on if she signed a contract--which she undoubtedly did.  

---

 Husker - there is NO reason that a woman should have to put up with her ex running her wedding.

And a MATERIAL change in circumstances regarding the venue can void the contract.  Any lawyer worth his salt could get her out of that one. 

And the OWNERS would likely very much understand and pull him off the job for her wedding.  Most people are actually decent human beings given the chance.

NAOW wrote:

---

I agree with the advice. Even though there is a contract, she is still the customer and I bet they would understand and be accommodating. Even if you broke up on good terms it would be weird to plan a wedding with your ex (for you and for your fiance).

---

 Plus, the thought would cross their minds that if he did anything that could be construed as vengeful such as "forgetting" to do something for the wedding, the owners could be faced breach of contract.  No business owner would want to be in that position,

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

---

Advice is spot on.

---

 Yep.  I think so, too. 

---

No it isn't.  How is her having an ex make a difference to the venue?  It's ONLY an issue if he acts unprofessionally--which he has not done to date.

 

Plus, you are a lawyer. You know darn well that she doesn't have a legal leg to stand on if she signed a contract--which she undoubtedly did.  

---

 Husker - there is NO reason that a woman should have to put up with her ex running her wedding.

And a MATERIAL change in circumstances regarding the venue can void the contract.  Any lawyer worth his salt could get her out of that one. 

And the OWNERS would likely very much understand and pull him off the job for her wedding.  Most people are actually decent human beings given the chance.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Monday 7th of September 2015 10:58:42 PM

---

 Show me the law where employing someone's ex is a breach of contract.  NO WAY.

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Also, you say that most people are actually decent human beings--but you certainly don't seem inclined to include her ex in that.

---

 I don't care how decent he is - a woman should not have to deal with her ex handling her wedding. 

---

 But that's just your feeling.  where is the breach of contract?  Should someone who doesn't like black people be allowed to ask for a white person in this situation?

Ohfour wrote:

---

This is what I am gathering from the OP.

The lady she HAD been dealing with is no longer there. He has been hired in her stead. He saw the upcoming events calendar and texted her letting her know that he would now be the point of contact.

I'm sure he didn't go out and find the job just to ruin her day. But now, it's IS his job. He has not been unprofessional. She can either have someone else deal with him, or she can suck it up. She signed a contract. The contract did not specify who she would be working with (other than possibly, "manager", which is VERY common when booking wedding venues).

---

 That's what I think.  He has not been unprofessional to this point.  Sure, she can ASK to work with someone else, but the fact is, this is who they hired to do that job.  There really may not be anyone else.

They might let her opt out--but then she'd be venue less.

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Also, you say that most people are actually decent human beings--but you certainly don't seem inclined to include her ex in that.

---

 I don't care how decent he is - a woman should not have to deal with her ex handling her wedding. 

---

 But that's just your feeling.  where is the breach of contract?  Should someone who doesn't like black people be allowed to ask for a white person in this situation?

---

 It's not breach of contract, but a contract takes several things to be effective, and a meeting of the minds is an essential element.  Would she have used that venue had her ex-boyfriend been the wedding planner?  No, of course not.  And the circumstances changed from when she signed the contract.  You seem to think law is black or white - and it is not.  It turns on the smallest of facts every day and it changes depending on the specific facts of a situation, the judge, the jury, etc. 

 

 

---

I disagree, but that's OK.  She can go through the motions of filing a breach of contract suit.  Then she will have no venue.  And if she loses, she will pay court costs plus the full cost of the venue.  She needs to decide if it is worth the risk.  It may be to her.  But if she loses, she will just have to take the lumps...

Ohfour wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Also, you say that most people are actually decent human beings--but you certainly don't seem inclined to include her ex in that.

---

 I don't care how decent he is - a woman should not have to deal with her ex handling her wedding. 

---

 But that's just your feeling.  where is the breach of contract?  Should someone who doesn't like black people be allowed to ask for a white person in this situation?

---

 It's not breach of contract, but a contract takes several things to be effective, and a meeting of the minds is an essential element.  Would she have used that venue had her ex-boyfriend been the wedding planner?  No, of course not.  And the circumstances changed from when she signed the contract.  You seem to think law is black or white - and it is not.  It turns on the smallest of facts every day and it changes depending on the specific facts of a situation, the judge, the jury, etc. 

 

 

---

I disagree, but that's OK.  She can go through the motions of filing a breach of contract suit.  Then she will have no venue.  And if she loses, she will pay court costs plus the full cost of the venue.  She needs to decide if it is worth the risk.  It may be to her.  But if she loses, she will just have to take the lumps...

---

 Who said anything about her filing suit?  See, people jump to lawsuit way too soon.  She would not file suit, she would talk to the owners, and then, if necessary, simply terminate the contract and request a return of her deposit.  In circumstances such as these - compromises and solutions can usually be gotten without a lawsuit. 

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

Ohfour wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Also, you say that most people are actually decent human beings--but you certainly don't seem inclined to include her ex in that.

---

 I don't care how decent he is - a woman should not have to deal with her ex handling her wedding. 

---

 But that's just your feeling.  where is the breach of contract?  Should someone who doesn't like black people be allowed to ask for a white person in this situation?

---

 It's not breach of contract, but a contract takes several things to be effective, and a meeting of the minds is an essential element.  Would she have used that venue had her ex-boyfriend been the wedding planner?  No, of course not.  And the circumstances changed from when she signed the contract.  You seem to think law is black or white - and it is not.  It turns on the smallest of facts every day and it changes depending on the specific facts of a situation, the judge, the jury, etc. 

 

 

---

I disagree, but that's OK.  She can go through the motions of filing a breach of contract suit.  Then she will have no venue.  And if she loses, she will pay court costs plus the full cost of the venue.  She needs to decide if it is worth the risk.  It may be to her.  But if she loses, she will just have to take the lumps...

---

 Who said anything about her filing suit?  See, people jump to lawsuit way too soon.  She would not file suit, she would talk to the owners, and then, if necessary, simply terminate the contract and request a return of her deposit.  In circumstances such as these - compromises and solutions can usually be gotten without a lawsuit. 

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Tuesday 8th of September 2015 12:34:52 PM

---

 She could do that--but she said all the other venues are booked.  I doubt if she wants to be without a place to hold her wedding.

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

Also, you say that most people are actually decent human beings--but you certainly don't seem inclined to include her ex in that.

---

 I don't care how decent he is - a woman should not have to deal with her ex handling her wedding. 

---

 But that's just your feeling.  where is the breach of contract?  Should someone who doesn't like black people be allowed to ask for a white person in this situation?

---

 It's not breach of contract, but a contract takes several things to be effective, and a meeting of the minds is an essential element.  Would she have used that venue had her ex-boyfriend been the wedding planner?  No, of course not.  And the circumstances changed from when she signed the contract.  You seem to think law is black or white - and it is not.  It turns on the smallest of facts every day and it changes depending on the specific facts of a situation, the judge, the jury, etc. 

 

 

---

 Even if she would sue and win, the only result is that she would get her deposit back--plus, she'd have to find a new venue on short notice.

 

this is NOT a material breach of contract.  Their hiring policies do not have to be subject to the whims of an individual client--even if they KNEW, which is unlikely.

 

the circumstances did not change.  The venue is still fully willing and able to provide the requested service.   you can't just break contracts on a whim for no reason--otherwise, why have contracts, at all?

---

 You have absolutely no idea if that is true or not.  A wedding venue contract could have easily specified a particular wedding planner. 

---

 Then there is her answer so the advice is still silly.

i highly doubt that is true, though.  How can the venue possibly predict that no one will quit, or get fired, or up and die?  No contract would lock them in to an impossible situation they can't possibly predict.

again, however, what does she want out of this?  They probably would let her out of the contract, but then what's she supposed to do--have her wedding in the wal-mart parking lot?

it would be far better to act like you are an adult, be professional, expect the same of the venue and their employees, and if their is an issue, deal with it appropriately at that time.

Ohfour wrote:

---

I've done over 50 weddings. That has not even once been the case. It usually specifies "Wedding Planner" or "Manager" or "Host". What if the planner quits or is fired for cause? Should the contract be voided? That's ridiculous.

---

 Yeah.  Venues have lawyers, too, and no good lawyer would lock them in to a contract they have no way of knowing they can fulfill.

huskerbb wrote:

---

They'd probably let her out of it and give her the deposit back, but then what? Shove the picnic tables at the city park together and throw a wedding? If she had other options, she would have said so. She said the other venues were booked.

---

 She should have the choice.  What they should do is just make sure he is nowhere near her wedding.

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

huskerbb wrote:

---

They'd probably let her out of it and give her the deposit back, but then what? Shove the picnic tables at the city park together and throw a wedding? If she had other options, she would have said so. She said the other venues were booked.

---

 She should have the choice.  What they should do is just make sure he is nowhere near her wedding.

---

 Why?  Just because she is immature and will throw a fit if they dont?

---

 Because a woman should not have to have her ex-boyfriend planning her wedding.  You don't even know how bad the break-up was or why. 

And this venue does NOT want that publicity; I can see the article now "Wedding venue forces woman to have wedding planned by vindicitive ex" or something similar.  Yeah - that's every bride's DREAM. 

huskerbb wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

I'm thinking elopement would be better. Or hell - a friend's back yard. It depends on how strongly she feels. But no, nobody should be able to force you to have your ex plan your wedding. That's patently absurd.

---

 Why?  You have not given one valid reason for your whining here.  the ONLY possible reason is that he won't do a good job--but that is a possibility with any employee, and she has not even really said she thinks he won't--plus there's no way to predict that, anyway.

---

 It's a WEDDING, husker.   Emotions matter.  Good grief.

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

And I doubt very much her fiance will like the idea of her ex-boyfriend planning the wedding, logical or not.

---

 But their likes and dislikes only go as far as their preferences for what the venue provides.  If they don't like black people does that mean they get to "opt out" of having a black planner?  

They have contracted with a venue to provide certain services.  As long as the venue provides said services, then what is the issue?

certainly, they MIGHT be able to take their business elsewhere (although they would not get their deposit back on these grounds), but by the brides own admission there IS NO elsewhere.

i think the best course is to act like a mature adult and assume he can be professional if you can.  If not, THEN they'll have a lawsuit.

just Czech wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

And I doubt very much her fiance will like the idea of her ex-boyfriend planning the wedding, logical or not.

---

There comes a point in life when you have to decide to be an adult. Now would be a good time. For both of them.

There is nothing in the OP that suggests the ex WILL cause a problem. Emotions (the brides or bridegrooms) are not a good enough reason IMHO. 

---

 Exactly.  You are never guaranteed that you won't run into an ex sometime in life.  This doesn't sound intentional on either the part of the venue or the ex.  

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

just Czech wrote:

---

Lawyerlady wrote:

---

And I doubt very much her fiance will like the idea of her ex-boyfriend planning the wedding, logical or not.

---

There comes a point in life when you have to decide to be an adult. Now would be a good time. For both of them.

There is nothing in the OP that suggests the ex WILL cause a problem. Emotions (the brides or bridegrooms) are not a good enough reason IMHO. 

---

 But he COULD be, and she shouldn't have to take that chance on a wedding she is paying a lot of money for and that is a special day for her.

---

 So could any employee.