TOTALLY GEEKED!

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Somewhat of an S/O of the Hacked thread; how young is too young for a cell phone

huskerbb · Guru

I don't think it is too young, anymore.

It's as much of a convenience for you as it is a new gadget for her.

My kids were a little older than that when they got theirs, probably, but really, if I had to do it over, I think I would probably bite the bullet and get them a phone earlier than I did.

I would just make sure she knows when it is appropriate to use, doesn't have it on in class, etc...

karl271 · Guru

It seems like kids over here (Japan) usually get their first cell phone when they enter primary school.... Not all, but a great many; I see them on the phones after school, etc.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

SS is ten. He will be 11 in January. He's too young. He has lost his phone countless times. He doesn't use it for the right reasons which are to call for help on his homework. We didn't buy him one that hooks up to the internet because he would abuse it. I also am not happy that he sleeps with it under his pillow so he can text in the middle of the night. But that's what goes on at his house and it's not my job to tell his mom how to parent. That being said we will continue to fund his phone because of the environment he lives in. They have no land line and he needs access to 911.

They say kids are not sleeping like they are supposed to now because they are always plugged in.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I think it depends on the child.

Some need one. Others not so much.

I don't know I'd go iPhone for a first phone.

But then again I didn't have a cell till after I had kids.

And didnt get my S5 till this past Christmas.

My kids got one the same time I did.

It was a package deal.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

huskerbb wrote:
I don't think it is too young, anymore.

It's as much of a convenience for you as it is a new gadget for her.

My kids were a little older than that when they got theirs, probably, but really, if I had to do it over, I think I would probably bite the bullet and get them a phone earlier than I did.

I would just make sure she knows when it is appropriate to use, doesn't have it on in class, etc...

Hold on to your hats...it doesn't happen often...but I agree with husker 100%

ed11563 · Guru

I think she's probably old enough.

If you're getting her an iPhone, make sure it's covered by your insurance. They get lost / stolen and broken.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.

ed11563 · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.

That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.

huskerbb · Guru

I don't see a cell phone as being any different than anything else.

A kid could lose their glasses, too, (and many do)--but we get them glasses when needed.

Maybe a cell phone isn't the necessity glasses are--but so what? The point is that kids might lose stuff, but that really isn't the acid test of whether or not they can/should have something.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Need vs. want.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.

We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.

And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
Need vs. want.

So what? That's not the point. Just because you think something is unnecessary doesn't mean every parent has to parent exactly the same way you do.

Kids lose jackets. They lose shoes. They lose toys. They lose pencils and pens. They lose their backpacks. They lose lots of stuff--but that doesn't mean we don't get them things just because they might lose them.

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.

LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Need vs. want.

So what? That's not the point. Just because you think something is unnecessary doesn't mean every parent has to parent exactly the same way you do.

Kids lose jackets. They lose shoes. They lose toys. They lose pencils and pens. They lose their backpacks. They lose lots of stuff--but that doesn't mean we don't get them things just because they might lose them.

Slow your roll there cowboy.

I said nothing about parenting the same.

You were comparing glasses to a cell phone.

Glasses are a necessity.

But a cell phone isn't necessarily.

Yes kids lose things.

That's why the advice to get insurance on it was given.

Which is a good thing for anyone actually.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.
LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.

No. It's not hypocritical of me. I hate him having a cell phone but they do not have a land line and he is often left alone for hours on end. Last week his step father held his mother at gun point. He used the phone we gave him to call 911. He lives in a house where abuse is a regular occurrence. So yes, he needs a cell phone for safety reasons.

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.
LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.
No. It's not hypocritical of me. I hate him having a cell phone but they do not have a land line and he is often left alone for hours on end. Last week his step father held his mother at gun point. He used the phone we gave him to call 911. He lives in a house where abuse is a regular occurrence. So yes, he needs a cell phone for safety reasons.

No, it's BS. You don't know why anyone else is getting their child a cell phone. The OP here says she would drop her land line, making it more of a necessity.

It's the height of arrogance to say crap like "well, my reasons for getting a kid a cell phone are legitimate, but no one else's are."

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.
LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.

Wow Husker. Are you reading the same posts I am?

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

NJN, I think Husker has been in the corn mash today.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.
LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.
No. It's not hypocritical of me. I hate him having a cell phone but they do not have a land line and he is often left alone for hours on end. Last week his step father held his mother at gun point. He used the phone we gave him to call 911. He lives in a house where abuse is a regular occurrence. So yes, he needs a cell phone for safety reasons.
No, it's BS. You don't know why anyone else is getting their child a cell phone. The OP here says she would drop her land line, making it more of a necessity.
It's the height of arrogance to say crap like "well, my reasons for getting a kid a cell phone are legitimate, but no one else's are."

Well, I never said anyone's reasons weren't legitimate. I personally feel, and still do, that ten is too young. Even for MY child. But he lives in a life or death situation. I don't know everything about IKWTDS but I know her daughter isn't living in a life or death situation. And she also has the option of keeping the house phone. It's not like cutting down on the bills means the difference between putting food on the table or starving. So yes, it's totally a different situation. She asked for opinions. This is an OPINION thread. Mine is that kids this age are too young. I am completely as entitled to my opinion as you are. And yes. My SS's situation is worlds apart from IKWTDS's. Ultimately though it's up to her what she wants to do. Not my business. I just shared my opinion as she asked.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

lilyofcourse wrote:
NJN, I think Husker has been in the corn mash today.

Apparently so.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Actually, on one of the many CPS visits his mom was ordered to get a phone for him to use. She either had to have a land line or a cell for him. And they followed up. She got him a tracfone. As soon as CPS cleared her she stopped refilling the minutes. We went round and round with her about the minutes. Even giving her a card to put minutes on the phone. She added it to hers instead. At that point we had two options. We could take her to court which involved a lot of time and drama. Or we could add him to our plan for ten bucks a month. Ten dollars was cheaper than taking her to court. Really, sometimes it's just easier to do it yourself.

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
We went through a nightmare with SS's phone. He's lost it three times. It was lost for weeks. Every time we canceled the service so that if someone found it they wouldn't run up a bill. It was hell getting it turned back on each time.
That's why my kids started with Tracfones. Prepaid, cheap. not much to lose.

But there's no "track my iPhone" in them. Lost is lost.
We put him on our family plan for ten dollars a month. So it wasn't so costly.
And things like glasses are a necessity. For most kids a cell phone is NOT a necessity. We wouldn't have even gotten SS one except in his situation it IS a necessity.
LOL!!! That is rather hypocritical. You think it's a necessity for YOU--but if someone else gets their child a cell phone then it isn't. Wow.
No. It's not hypocritical of me. I hate him having a cell phone but they do not have a land line and he is often left alone for hours on end. Last week his step father held his mother at gun point. He used the phone we gave him to call 911. He lives in a house where abuse is a regular occurrence. So yes, he needs a cell phone for safety reasons.
No, it's BS. You don't know why anyone else is getting their child a cell phone. The OP here says she would drop her land line, making it more of a necessity.
It's the height of arrogance to say crap like "well, my reasons for getting a kid a cell phone are legitimate, but no one else's are."
Well, I never said anyone's reasons weren't legitimate. I personally feel, and still do, that ten is too young. Even for MY child. But he lives in a life or death situation. I don't know everything about IKWTDS but I know her daughter isn't living in a life or death situation. And she also has the option of keeping the house phone. It's not like cutting down on the bills means the difference between putting food on the table or starving. So yes, it's totally a different situation. She asked for opinions. This is an OPINION thread. Mine is that kids this age are too young. I am completely as entitled to my opinion as you are. And yes. My SS's situation is worlds apart from IKWTDS's. Ultimately though it's up to her what she wants to do. Not my business. I just shared my opinion as she asked.

It doesn't matter whether or not it is exactly the same. You seem to feel your reasons are valid, and hers are not. That is the height of arrogance.

Do as I say--not as I do seem to be your mantra. You think 10 is too young--but not in your case. LOL!!! Arrogant.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

She can do whatever she wants. Show me where I told her not to get her child a phone? I dare you. I have not and did not. I also never said her reasons aren't valid. Not once. Show me where I said that? I dare you. All I have said, again and again, is that our situations are vastly different. And they are. And that does not make me arrogant. But feel free to call me whatever names you wish.

I will stand by this a thousand times. I child getting a cell phone to call 911 in case his step father tries to kill his mom is a vastly different situation than a kid who just wants a phone because they want a phone. Or because it's convenient. Having said that I really don't give a damn who gets a phone. Unlike you I don't tell others how to parent. If IKWTDS wants to get her daughter a phone more power to her. I do not care. She asked for opinions. I gave mine. Again, I think it's too young. If we didn't have to worry about my SS GETTING MURDERED then he wouldn't have a phone. I know that concept is difficult for your limited mind to grasp.

Ohfour · Hooker

When I was 10, my mother made me and my sister wear dimes in our penny loafers (uniform required) in case we needed to use a pay phone. How many pay phones has anyone seen in the past few years? Cell phones have replaced pay phones. No way in hell would I want my child not to be able to get in touch with me.
IKWTDS, I know your DD. She is responsible and definitely deserving of a phone. I wouldnt hesitate for one second with her...

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

OGFG stop with the dramatics!; I want to get her one, it will be a xmas or bday gift and the land line will be discontinued. I though 10 or 11 was a bit young. She would not be on my plan so she wouldn't be able to burn up the date; it would be pay as go deal that way she would learn how to budget her usage. Yes, there would be insurance on the phone.

Holy cow, do always have arguments, debates over every little thing! It's like we are family, Geesh

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Ohfour wrote:
When I was 10, my mother made me and my sister wear dimes in our penny loafers (uniform required) in case we needed to use a pay phone. How many pay phones has anyone seen in the past few years? Cell phones have replaced pay phones. No way in hell would I want my child not to be able to get in touch with me.
IKWTDS, I know your DD. She is responsible and definitely deserving of a phone. I wouldnt hesitate for one second with her...

Well ****, I guess you are Santa this year! biggrin

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

And I remember putting the coins in the shoes....

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I think the time to get them a phone is when you think it is of benefit for YOU as a parent to get them a phone. And of course they have to have the maturity to be responsible for it. There are no pay phones anymore. Kids are coming and going all the time due to sports. I am glad that my kids have phones. And, I dont' have a problem with a 10 yr old having one. But, I wouldn't be getting them an iPhone at that age. Just a track phone, something basic for calling and texing and emergencies.

Ohfour · Hooker

Just let her know that Aunt Ohfour took her side on this!!!! Lol!!!!

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

There are no pay phones anymore. But I do think some kids are more responsible than others. I think, at ten, my SS has shown himself to be really irresponsible with it. He loses it too often. He uses it for the wrong things. IF we had the option of not getting him one then we wouldn't have. But that is just how we personally feel. I think that kids mature at different rates and parents need to decide when is the right time. If they're responsible with the phone then that is the right time to me. If they can't keep track of it or you find out they're texting in school or something, then no, they're not ready. I think it's really a personal decision. I hate having to keep up with SS's phone when he's here. A couple weekends ago he was texting on it in the bathroom and left it there when we took him home. We ended up making a special trip out to his house to give him his phone.

I mean seriously, it's pretty basic common sense. If you get them a phone and they are constantly losing it they're probably not ready to have it.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Ohfour wrote:
Just let her know that Aunt Ohfour took her side on this!!!! Lol!!!!

LOL the gift tag will say "From Santa, O4 approved"!

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

And I wasn't trying to be "dramatic". We just have a different situation.

Ohfour · Hooker

IKWTDS's DD is wise beyond her years. Ive never spent time with another kid that is as trustworthy and responsible as she is. She has the intelligence and presents herself as a teenager (without the attitude, but i have no doubt that will come later :) ) . She already has an iPad that she is responsible for, a phone just adds a phone. She takes responsibility for her things. Most definitely deserving of a phone...

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Ohfour wrote:
IKWTDS's DD is wise beyond her years. Ive never spent time with another kid that is as trustworthy and responsible as she is. She has the intelligence and presents herself as a teenager (without the attitude, but i have no doubt that will come later :) ) . She already has an iPad that she is responsible for, a phone just adds a phone. She takes responsibility for her things. Most definitely deserving of a phone...

Holy Cow, she should have asked you to write one of her referrals for the leadership team at school! Thanks so much for those words.

Ohfour · Hooker

All true. I love that kid...

NAOW · Vette's SS

I am wondering too, and slight hijack. Do you guys monitor your kids' online activity? Isn't it harder to do if they have internet on their phones.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Ohfour wrote:
All true. I love that kid...

{hugs} BTW hate hugging using parenths

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

NAOW wrote:
I am wondering too, and slight hijack. Do you guys monitor your kids' online activity? Isn't it harder to do if they have internet on their phones.

Not a hijack and is the next issue. Need to put parental controls if she gets a phone.

-- Edited by I know what to do_sometimes on Sunday 27th of September 2015 08:57:03 PM

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

The only caution I would give is that when your child is the only one to have a phone - the other kids will want to use it. She needs to be confident enough to tell them no.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Mellow Momma wrote:
The only caution I would give is that when your child is the only one to have a phone - the other kids will want to use it. She needs to be confident enough to tell them no.

That is one of my issues against it. DD is mature, but still the peer thing is an issue

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

When my DD's got their phones, they weren't the first but they weren't the last either. It wasn't a curiosity amongst their friends.

If you got one for her, could you tell her she is NOT to take it out of her book bag unless it's an emergency and she has to use it?! Otherwise everyone will want to see it, use it, etc.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

DH had an old fashioned flip phone. He COULD hook up to the internet but it was a long tedious process. When we decided to put SS on our plan we just gave him DH's old and DH upgraded. So SS can't get on the internet. The only thing we were worried about as far as the internet went was buying video games and charging up our bill.

Anyway, that's what we did FWIW. Not sure this is even relevant at this point.

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
She can do whatever she wants. Show me where I told her not to get her child a phone? I dare you. I have not and did not. I also never said her reasons aren't valid. Not once. Show me where I said that? I dare you. All I have said, again and again, is that our situations are vastly different. And they are. And that does not make me arrogant. But feel free to call me whatever names you wish.

I will stand by this a thousand times. I child getting a cell phone to call 911 in case his step father tries to kill his mom is a vastly different situation than a kid who just wants a phone because they want a phone. Or because it's convenient. Having said that I really don't give a damn who gets a phone. Unlike you I don't tell others how to parent. If IKWTDS wants to get her daughter a phone more power to her. I do not care. She asked for opinions. I gave mine. Again, I think it's too young. If we didn't have to worry about my SS GETTING MURDERED then he wouldn't have a phone. I know that concept is difficult for your limited mind to grasp.

BS. You said SEVERAL times that it was a "necessity" in your case--but for most people it's not a necessity.

You said it's too young for HER child--but obviously not for your SS who is the same age or younger.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I don't monitor them to the nth degree.

I watch the data usage. We share data so we have allotments each month.

When they were younger I watched them more closely.

But they didnt have phones til middle school and didn't get one they could access the Web till high school.

I think a parent generally knows if their child can handle the responsibility of it.

And with proper boundaries and expectations there is no reason why it can't be a wonderful thing to have.

Dona Worry Be Happy · Vette's SS!!

Husker, what the h@ll is your problem? NO ONE else has a problem with what NJN said. Seriously.
And yes, there is a drastic difference between a ten year old wanting a phone because all her friends have one and a ten year old needing a phone to dial 911 because his stepdad is beating up his mom. If you can't see that, you are being willfully stupid.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

So DD11 started middle school this year, and she swears that her and her one friend are the only ones without phones, but she is not bugging me for a phone b/c I have repeatedly said up to this point that kids that young do not need cell phones. I even talked to her friend's mom, and we are both now thinking Christmas for phones. I really wanted to wait until she is 12 - but her birthday is only a couple of months after Christmas. And she still doesn't NEED it. But, I have found myself wanting to communicate with her during the day while she is at school, and not being able to, sooooo she may be getting one, too.

So, I guess I'm changing my perspective and saying middle school is a good time if they are responsible enough.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
All true. I love that kid...
{hugs} BTW hate hugging using parenths

You should NOT have told me that...

{huggy hugs}

flan

FNW · Guru

I'm in the "necessity" camp. I, too, carried change for a phone call. I have had a cell phone of one persuasion or another since 1990. Around the time I started commuting to work in L.A. by way of a couple sketchy neighborhoods at night. I want my boys to be able to reach me at all times. So mine will have them soon. Not quite yet, as they are only 7, but soon. Probably in the next year or two.

huskerbb · Guru

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
Husker, what the h@ll is your problem? NO ONE else has a problem with what NJN said. Seriously.
And yes, there is a drastic difference between a ten year old wanting a phone because all her friends have one and a ten year old needing a phone to dial 911 because his stepdad is beating up his mom. If you can't see that, you are being willfully stupid.

the OP did not say that's why she was thinking about getting her a cell phone, so I'm not sure where you got that nonsense.

beyond that, its arrogant to say that your reasons for doing it are valid, but no ine else's are, so therefore your kid needs one, but all other children that age dont. Absurd.