TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

College

TrudyML · Guru

I commuted. Had plenty of friends and activities.

Congrats! Great school.

Fort Worth Mom · Mod/Penguin lover/Princess!

I commuted, too. And it was fine.

I think commuting his first two years, and doing two years on the main campus, would be a nice mix.

And you're right, it would save a ton of money. smile

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I think each family has to do what is right for them.

The college experience is over romanticized in my opinion.

Lindley · Guru

Both my kids stayed at School One in a dorm and one in a apartment. I think it just depends on what is right for the situation. We live to far from any college or university for having them commute to be a option. I think what your son is planning to do sounds like a good plan.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

He'll still get the college experience in years 3 and 4. I think you have a good plan.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Congrats. I have a good friend who graduated from Penn State with an engineering degree & he makes bank now. Your son is making a wise choice. I think the commuting the first two years sounds like a great plan. Here there is a real push to start at community college & then transfer. They've made all kinds of changes so that the cc credits are accepted at all state colleges/universities.

ed11563 · Guru

I think that

(1) kids should do their best to pay their own way through college, usually by earning money in jobs, not by borrowing, and

(2) graduating debt-free should be a high priority.

In my freshman year, in a dorm at a state university, I saw clearly that the ones who partied instead of studying, were there courtesy of the National Bank of Daddy.

Their parents didn't do them any favors by giving them a free ride.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I commuted all four years. I couldn't afford to live on campus. I'm fine. My DN is commuting all four of her years. She's as active as she wants to be. I think some kids just want to get an education. Not all kids want to experience all the stuff on campus. It's great, fine, and cool if a student does want to live on campus but if that's not their priority I don't think it matters.

FNW · Guru

I went part-time evenings. When I was in my 20's, I sometimes wished I had experienced the whole college thing. But I got over it.

The school my brother attended was 20 minutes from home. He was required to spend the freshman year living in a dorm. He ended up spending all 4 years living in a dorm. But he was able to get a private room for the last 3 years. He was home every weekend, too.

My friend's daughter went to WVU right out of high school. Her friends were more into partying than she was. She dropped out, and went to the local community college. Two years and an AS later, she moved back to WVU and finished up her degree. She had a whole different set of friends and everyone had matured a bit.

Congrats, that's a good school for engineering. My MIL wanted my husband to go there. She wanted him to be a patent attorney. He had other plans for his career, and went to Univ. of PA, Wharton Business School. He made the decision that was right for him.

How does your son feel about it? I would let his feelings gauge my decision.

Lindley · Guru

My dd had a awesome time in college, made a few life time friends who she is still friends with. Played sports, went on ski trips, went overseas twice and was involved in the yearbook. She still managed to graduate magna cum laude. My son went to a tech school out of state and not only worked hard for his grades but had fun and still friends with those he met there. Yes mom and dad foot the bill but they didn't abuse it.

I do agree it is not for everyone and all kids are different.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Lindley wrote:
My dd had a awesome time in college, made a few life time friends who she is still friends with. Played sports, went on ski trips, went overseas twice and was involved in the yearbook. She still managed to graduate magna cum laude. My son went to a tech school out of state and not only worked hard for his grades but had fun and still friends with those he met there. Yes mom and dad foot the bill but they didn't abuse it.

I do agree it is not for everyone and all kids are different.

I think this is the key. For some kids it's an integral part of being in college. Just as much so as getting an education or being away from home. And I think there's nothing wrong with that. Some kids really want and need that. Others just don't care. They just want their degree. None of the fluff. I think it's up to each person to decide what they want. There's no right or wrong answer.

Lindley · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Lindley wrote:
My dd had a awesome time in college, made a few life time friends who she is still friends with. Played sports, went on ski trips, went overseas twice and was involved in the yearbook. She still managed to graduate magna cum laude. My son went to a tech school out of state and not only worked hard for his grades but had fun and still friends with those he met there. Yes mom and dad foot the bill but they didn't abuse it.

I do agree it is not for everyone and all kids are different.
I think this is the key. For some kids it's an integral part of being in college. Just as much so as getting an education or being away from home. And I think there's nothing wrong with that. Some kids really want and need that. Others just don't care. They just want their degree. None of the fluff. I think it's up to each person to decide what they want. There's no right or wrong answer.

That is so true, not all kids are the same. My son would not have done well in a traditional school but thrived in a tech. school. It is different for everyone. My husband commuted to college and worked part time. Also just from what I've seen just because a kid turns 18 and graduatd high school does not mean they are ready to live away from home.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I know when I went to college I was a single mom. I didn't even really want to be in college per se. I wanted an education so I could have a job where I made enough money to support my kids. I didn't really care about all the gatherings. I think I may have gone to a couple things but not many. I DID take advantage of the discounts that were offered through the theater department. As a student we got seats at next to nothing. I got to see Carrot Top, Maya Angelou, and took my kids to see the Nutcracker Suite. They always had really good people coming in.

DN is not living on campus. She works full time, takes three classes a semester, lives with her b/f, and is very involved with our family. She doesn't really have the time to devote to activities. Before the b/f came along I think she belonged to I think two activities. She quit them though. I don't think she really cared either way. It was just something to fill time. I do know she and the b/f recently went to a football game that was here in our hometown. They really enjoyed it.

Some kids thrive on the student life though. Getting involved in political groups or other groups can really teach them some important life skills. If that's what a kid wants I think they should have the opportunity to experience it. There's nothing worse than looking back at your past and regretting not doing something. That's a lesson I learned pretty early in life.

sweet tooth · Member

Lawyerlady wrote:
He'll still get the college experience in years 3 and 4. I think you have a good plan.

This. It's what my son did, and it was perfect. We saved a TON of money from him commuting the first two years, then he had a wonderful experience living in the dorm the last two years. And after two years of dorm living, he said he had a great time but was ready to move on. Four years of dorm living might have been too much for him.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Penn State is one awesome, respectful University! So congrats!

My story is DS went to a local well respected university that was also a party school. As a HS grad gift, my siblings paid for him to live on campus, I couldn't afford it. Also wasn't needed since we live 6 miles away. Anyway, he came home one day near the end of the second semester and told me if he lived on campus one more day, he would never graduate. Gotta hand it to him! So he went to the Community College adjoined with the University, earned his AS and then continued engineering at the University prior to going into the Navy.

My point is, it will not be detrimate to him to commute to school. He will end up more mature when he does get to live on campus and campus social life is what the kid makes of them; he will be fine.