TOTALLY GEEKED!

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
totallygeeked -> totallygeeked general -> Dear Miss Manners:Gluten Free Thanksgiving Guests
Post Info TOPIC: Dear Miss Manners:Gluten Free Thanksgiving Guests
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Dear Miss Manners:Gluten Free Thanksgiving Guests
Permalink  
 

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Our son's girlfriend will be joining us this year for Thanksgiving. She is a lovely person who also has celiac disease. I have modified the menu to avoid gluten (simple enough with a spread of vegetables and turkey -- stuffing has never been a huge seller on our table).

The meal will be gluten-free ... with one exception. I want to keep the traditional gravy made with flour. Thanksgiving is the one time of year I eat gravy, and it is my favorite part of the meal. I purchased a gluten-free gravy mix that I plan to prepare and serve with the meal so the young woman may have some of that if she likes.

My husband feels this is terribly rude because the alternative gravy will be inferior to the other. He thinks the appropriate thing would be for me to make one gluten-free gravy by modifying my recipe to use a non-gluten thickener (not a simple task).

Is my plan rude?



GENTLE READER: No. If your son's girlfriend is as lovely as you say she is, then she will appreciate the gesture of making her a second gravy -- and not require that it be the only option for everyone.

Miss Manners certainly acknowledges real health and moral issues that require guests to have special culinary needs. But she only requires of their hosts that they make a valiant effort to give those guests something to eat, not that they adjust the entire menu to accommodate only them. She further entreats the guests to appreciate those efforts, smile politely and eat what they can.


__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Permalink  
 

If she wants to make gluten free gravy, just use cornstarch and make the gravy. Tastes the same. But, no it is not rude to offer an alternative. However, she may not even like gravy. Some people don't eat it.

__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
Lawyerlady


On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Status: Offline
Posts: 27192
Date:
Permalink  
 

And seriously, I'd still make the stuffing. Not every dish at the table has to be gluten free, just enough of them that the girl can eat enough of a meal.

__________________

LawyerLady

 

I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. 
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Permalink  
 

If hubby wants to stick his nose in and tell her how to prepare the meal, then maybe HE can do it.

__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Permalink  
 

Gluten "free" is really a misnomer. Sorry but nobody is "gluten free". Gluten reduced would be a more appropriate term because I don't know anyone who doesn't ingest some gluten along the way. They do. As for celiac's, my son was diagnosed with that. He did a period of intense gluten "free" as much as possible. But now, we are bit more relaxed about it. You aren't going to die if you eat a bit of gluten. And, that is problem with all these "allergies' and people dont' understand the differences.

__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
FNW


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 18703
Date:
Permalink  
 

I would use cornstarch, personally. Or almond flour or one of the other substitutes. But it is nice she is taking the girl's condition into situation. Dad needs to mind his own business and stay out of the kitchen.

__________________

#it's5o'clocksomewhere
Lindley


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 9186
Date:
Permalink  
 

My DIL can't eat gluten and I try to have enough food that she has plenty to eat too. I think it would be fine that she makes two types of gravy. She would appreciate the thoughtfulness.

__________________
chef


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 6644
Date:
Permalink  
 

I can't fathom how it can be rude to make a separate dish for someone with dietary restrictions.

One of my friends has a dairy allergy. Not lactose intolerant. Allergic to all dairy proteins. When I cook and she is present, I make sure there is plenty for her to eat, whether it's a separate meal for her or the meal itself is dairy free. She can't even have butter so it usually ends up being a separate meal. No big deal and she's not offended.

__________________

~At Gnome in the Kitchen~
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

LGS is right in that gluten is more of an "allergy". Just like peanut allergy. People need to understand this. Some people eat a peanut and get the hives but are fine with no treatment and just letting it pass. Others are in the same room with a peanut and their throat begins to close up and they can die. There have been a small number of very severe gluten intolerant people who did have to be totally isolated for their own health. Here's the deal with gluten. It's in almost EVERYTHING. You seriously have to read packages to find out what they put in things. We are so picky about our meat now that DS has been diagnosed. It's amazing the fillers and crap they put in stuff. We have switched a lot of things over in our house. Our meat. We just no longer buy the cheap cuts or cheap filler meat. That way there is no confusion or who can have what. Everyone eats the same meat. Our pasta. All gluten free. We just switched the whole family over entirely. Everyone eats the same pasta now. About the only thing we do differently is bread. We buy him gluten free bread and I make our own bread. I haven't been able to make a decent loaf of gluten free bread. My son is educated on what he needs to do and not do. Sometimes he does it and sometimes not. Yesterday he chose not to follow his diet and got sent home from work early because of profuse vomiting. So yes, it does adversely effect people. It's not a joke.

That being said he never has a problem on Thanksgiving. Turkey and veggies are all gluten free. Unless you're using some weird pressed turkey product. It's really easy to have that. Mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes are both gluten free. Take the croutons off a tossed salad and it's usually gluten free. As far as dessert goes he eats everything but scrapes it out of the pie shell which he can't have.

The dad needs to mind his own business. The majority of people with these issues are really nice and not trying to force anything on the host. They may ask, for clarification purposes, but they don't expect people to change up everything to suit them. The only time it would be rude is if you are very close friends with the person and say invite them over for pizza. That would be mean.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
I know what to do_sometimes


Frozen Sucks!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24384
Date:
Permalink  
 

Just make rice dish. The girl can eat turkey and rice and veggies. Everyone else can have the traditional meal.

__________________

Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.

Frozen is the bestest movie ever, NOT!
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
totallygeeked -> totallygeeked general -> Dear Miss Manners:Gluten Free Thanksgiving Guests


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard