TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Dear Prudie: "Unequal" Childcare

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

That depends. Our local daycare only billed hours. And, the daycare owner was pretty flexible about it. But, for most places, you will have to pay full time. However, she can take her up on the offer at other times. Maybe they want a night out or a day to go shopping or whatever as well. THere are lots of oppportunities to babysit. But, her concerns about this being "equal" are silly. SHE is the one setting up a problem that doesn't even exist. The more people who love your child, the better. It isn't a competition. Sheesh.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

When did everything have to be equal?

Nothing is ever equal.

Be thankful you have parents who are looking forward to being involved and shut up.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.

Not necessarily. not all daycares operate that way.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Tuesday 5th of January 2016 11:06:48 AM

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.
Not necessarily. not all daycares operate that way.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Tuesday 5th of January 2016 11:06:48 AM

Most of the chains do. Why have a part-time kid take the place of a full-time one? You're losing money.

flan

NAOW · Vette's SS

I tried finding part time care here and it was non-existent. I had to pay full time to hold her spot even though she wouldn't be there for all those hours.

But this is silly. If that is your only issue with it, then just do it and don't overthink it.

chef · Guru

My grandma babysits way more than any other family member. She lives closest to us so it makes the most sense. She loves having DS so it's not a problem. My uncle lives with her so he gets a lot of DS time too. DS still loves his other grandparents to pieces and is attached to them.

I'd be fine with my MIL babysitting him for overnights but she works and FIL doesn't change diapers so that's a no go until DS is potty-trained.

huskerbb · Guru

We always had child care that we paid by the hour the time they were there.

My buddy sends his to a church daycare that is the same way.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Well, everyone doesn't live in the same place. As i said, i only paid for actual hours. My daycare was very flexible.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

It's best to realize now that nothing will ever be "equal". Even trying to do that will drive you insane. And whether you manage to keep things equal does not mean your kid will like spending time with them equally. One is bound to be more fun than another.

Bonny22Pye · Guru

Most places I have encountered that are centers have either part time or full time tuition. Most home daycare's tend to just do full time price for the week.

I pay for full time care. Full amount due on the 1st of each month. They provide breakfast, two snacks and lunch. I send in extra snacks to have on hand just in case. My tuition covers two weeks of paid vacation for the staff a year as well. They close for one week in July and then again for Xmas.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

None of the day cares around here do part time. That was the issue when we were watching Marilyn.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Some of ours will do 3-day part time, but not 4. If you want more than 3, you bump to full time. So, doing 4 days a week would cost full time. And the part time rate is higher on a pro-rata daily basis than full time.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

SOME of ours have a drop in day thing. But you have to be registered ahead of time and pay the registration fee ahead of time. And then it's a daily rate. And that's if they have room.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
SOME of ours have a drop in day thing. But you have to be registered ahead of time and pay the registration fee ahead of time. And then it's a daily rate. And that's if they have room.

Drop in rates are soooooo high.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
SOME of ours have a drop in day thing. But you have to be registered ahead of time and pay the registration fee ahead of time. And then it's a daily rate. And that's if they have room.
Drop in rates are soooooo high.

Yes. They are.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Lawyerlady wrote:
She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.

Yep

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.
Not necessarily. not all daycares operate that way.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Tuesday 5th of January 2016 11:06:48 AM

Maybe not in your world

huskerbb · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
She will be paying for full time daycare whether she uses it or not.
Not necessarily. not all daycares operate that way.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Tuesday 5th of January 2016 11:06:48 AM
Maybe not in your world

???? So where you live is the way they all operate everywhere? BS.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I meant to ask Caitlyn if they have the drop in day care.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?

I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.

Well, I will tell you that is not the norm. Except maybe in Nebraska, but you people seem to do a lot of things differently there.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

It is not the norm here. In fact, there is no part time daycare. There's only full time and drop in. And drop in is only if they have empty slots. Which most of the time the empty slots are in the older school age kids. Not in the smaller ages. I know a couple people that looked into part time daycare here. There isn't any here.

Dona Worry Be Happy · Vette's SS!!

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.

Right. And every body knows men stand around discussing daycare options is painstaking detail.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.

You said it was a CHURCH daycare. I am talking about the CHAINS.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
You said it was a CHURCH daycare. I am talking about the CHAINS.
flan

Well, i have had all kids in daycare. And, I paid by the HOUR. And, my mom would watch my kids one or two days a week. So, no, i was not charged a weekly rate but an hourly rate. It wasn't a big deal and that is how she operates her daycare. And, no it was not a Church daycare. So, if you all want to continue with your mantra that all daycares operate the same, they don't.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I'm taking about daycares that I have had experience with...both with my kids & visiting them for 30+ years.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
I'm taking about daycares that I have had experience with...both with my kids & visiting them for 30+ years.

flan

OK? And so am i. Some charge a full time week and some charge hourly or daily. So what?

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
I'm taking about daycares that I have had experience with...both with my kids & visiting them for 30+ years.

flan
OK? And so am i. Some charge a full time week and some charge hourly or daily. So what?

You have visited daycares for 30 years?

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
I'm taking about daycares that I have had experience with...both with my kids & visiting them for 30+ years.

flan
OK? And so am i. Some charge a full time week and some charge hourly or daily. So what?
You have visited daycares for 30 years?
flan

Yes, it's my hobby. biggrin

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Just asked Caitlyn if they do drop in and/or hourly where she works.

Yes they do.

But it can be very high.

Where she works has two locations, is both private but also has a state run pre-k inside it.

huskerbb · Guru

flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
You said it was a CHURCH daycare. I am talking about the CHAINS.
flan

BS. Where in the post I responded to did it say anything about chains? The conversation was about daycares in general--and they don't all operate the same way.

huskerbb · Guru

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
Right. And every body knows men stand around discussing daycare options is painstaking detail.

??? What an idiotic comment. Kids are one of the foremost topics we discuss.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Wednesday 6th of January 2016 10:13:21 AM

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
Well, I will tell you that is not the norm. Except maybe in Nebraska, but you people seem to do a lot of things differently there.

I never said it was the norm. Hence why I said in my first post "not necessarily". You seem to think that every place is the same as yours. Gaga refutes that, as well.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
You said it was a CHURCH daycare. I am talking about the CHAINS.
flan
BS. Where in the post I responded to did it say anything about chains? The conversation was about daycares in general--and they don't all operate the same way.

No, they don't. But most of the good ones do. They usually have waiting lists and can have stricter requirements. The ones that tend to allow more leeway are ones that don't have the same hours, or close more frequently, or are more casual.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
The real question, Husker, is when is the last time you had to shop around for daycare?
I haven't--but like I said, my buddy has a daycare for his twins that only charges the days they are there. They are in it NOW.
You said it was a CHURCH daycare. I am talking about the CHAINS.
flan
BS. Where in the post I responded to did it say anything about chains? The conversation was about daycares in general--and they don't all operate the same way.
No, they don't. But most of the good ones do. They usually have waiting lists and can have stricter requirements. The ones that tend to allow more leeway are ones that don't have the same hours, or close more frequently, or are more casual.

Um, ok.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

And I have found that daycares that have openings for drop-offs and part-time kids are not the most desirable daycares.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
And I have found that daycares that have openings for drop-offs and part-time kids are not the most desirable daycares.

That's exactly right. The best daycares have waiting lists.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
We always had child care that we paid by the hour the time they were there.

My buddy sends his to a church daycare that is the same way.

CHURCH daycares are different from CHAINS...which is what I said in my later post.

flan

huskerbb · Guru

flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
We always had child care that we paid by the hour the time they were there.

My buddy sends his to a church daycare that is the same way.
CHURCH daycares are different from CHAINS...which is what I said in my later post.
flan

I wasn't responding to you. Read the thread.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
And I have found that daycares that have openings for drop-offs and part-time kids are not the most desirable daycares.

Again, your area, not everywhere.

My kids got excellent care when they were little.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

A lot of daycare have an alternative aftercare program and school holiday hours.

That varies day to day.

They actually figure in openings for those.

huskerbb · Guru

Too much emphasis is put on "chain" daycares or whatever.

Likely, some neighbor down the street could have her own daycare and do as good or better of a job--and cheaper. Both my sister and one SIL had daycares at one point and neither ever had any complaints.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
Too much emphasis is put on "chain" daycares or whatever.

Likely, some neighbor down the street could have her own daycare and do as good or better of a job--and cheaper. Both my sister and one SIL had daycares at one point and neither ever had any complaints.

I've used both.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Too much emphasis is put on "chain" daycares or whatever.

Likely, some neighbor down the street could have her own daycare and do as good or better of a job--and cheaper. Both my sister and one SIL had daycares at one point and neither ever had any complaints.

There are pros and cons to both. Having a private in-home daycare is preferable for the personal touch, but then you have to scramble when that person gets sick, or they need a day off, or they go on vacation. And many of them are just babysitters - they don't do enrichment and learning. A dedicated daycare center is held to higher standards with licensing requirements, usually has a learning curriculum in place, and doesn't close except for holidays.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
And I have found that daycares that have openings for drop-offs and part-time kids are not the most desirable daycares.
Again, your area, not everywhere.

My kids got excellent care when they were little.

Baby J went to a private in home daycare. We loved her except for all her personal days - they were numerous, and there was no back up when she was sick. We got through it, but life got a whole lot easier when she started Pre-school and I had a set schedule for her.

FNW · Guru

The boys' did not attend "daycare" until they were two, and it was "preschool". They take them full time, part-time, half-days, full-days, after school, before school, whatever you want. But you commit to it at the beginning of the school year (first day after Labor Day), and different rates apply depending on which "schedule" you chose. Two year olds are more expensive, too, as they provide diapers/potty training, etc.

That being said, for those first two years my parents came to my house three days a week. I worked from home the other two days. And naturally, the boys adore my parents where they don't really know the in-laws. This created some very hard feelings on the part of my in-laws. Before having the boys, everyone got along quite well. We would host (or MIL would host) gatherings where my parents were included. Once the boys were born, the in-laws* were jealous that the boys preferred to sit by my parents at the table, or play with my parents. But the problem was, the in-laws (except SIL & MIL) wouldn't make any attempt to play with them or interact with them. They would sit on the sofa and just watch them, or ignore them altogether.

*in-laws = FIL and his wife. SIL & MIL weren't really jealous, and put forth efforts to bond with the boys.

This bond and lack of bond continues to this day. Last night I wrote out thank you notes for the in-laws for the boys to sign (it was easier than fighting with them over having them write them out themselves). #1 insisted on signing the card to FIL "sincerely", but when it was time to sign SIL's card, he signed, "love". I'm sure there will be fall-out from that, but as #1 says, "what evs."

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
And I have found that daycares that have openings for drop-offs and part-time kids are not the most desirable daycares.
Again, your area, not everywhere.

My kids got excellent care when they were little.
Baby J went to a private in home daycare. We loved her except for all her personal days - they were numerous, and there was no back up when she was sick. We got through it, but life got a whole lot easier when she started Pre-school and I had a set schedule for her.

Dunno. The lady we had got a replacement when she had to be gone.