Dear Prudence, A few months ago my boyfriend broke up with his ex-girlfriend and started dating me. He said he was looking for new places, but fast-forward a few months and he hasn’t moved out of their apartment. He says he’s really picky about his living situation, and he’s paying his ex’s rent because she’s jobless. He’s over here all the time and has expressed deep feelings for me, but it’s become obvious his girlfriend is not over him. I appreciate his empathy, but am I being stupid? When do you stop being patient and draw the line?
—No Room Live-In Ex
I mean this as gently as possible, because I do not think you are a stupid person, but yes, you are being a bit stupid at the moment. He’s not living with her out of empathy. Here is another example of where it’s better not to suppress what you want and expect out of a relationship. Stop being patient now. Draw the line now. His girlfriend is not over him because he has not actually left her yet. You can hardly blame her for thinking the man who lives with her and pays her rent is still an important part of her life. I’m picky about my living situation, too, and if I were living with someone I’d recently dumped, I’d pick just about anywhere else to live, up to and including under a bridge. I’ll bet you don’t put up with nonsense in other areas of your life. Don’t put up with his.
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
I'd bet he is either married or engaged to the one he is living with.
How can people be so stupid?
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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
