TOTALLY GEEKED!

I'd probably reply with "haha, good one!"

Some people just don't understand normal social boundaries.

I wonder what else this person expects from others that we would consider unreasonable.

 

For me, it would depend on how detailed the recipes are, how much time I had, and whether I felt like cooking a bunch of food or not. If I had the time and desire to produce food for 30 people, I would calculate the approximate cost of the ingredients and tell her I will make the food but I need $x in order to do so. I don't mind putting in some of the money but I'm not going to fund the whole thing.

There would also be the understanding that food will be put into those disposable foil containers and if she wants a fancy serving set up, she needs to provide the serving dishes.

chef wrote:

---

For me, it would depend on how detailed the recipes are, how much time I had, and whether I felt like cooking a bunch of food or not. If I had the time and desire to produce food for 30 people, I would calculate the approximate cost of the ingredients and tell her I will make the food but I need $x in order to do so. I don't mind putting in some of the money but I'm not going to fund the whole thing.

There would also be the understanding that food will be put into those disposable foil containers and if she wants a fancy serving set up, she needs to provide the serving dishes.

---

 You're nice.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

---

chef wrote:

---

For me, it would depend on how detailed the recipes are, how much time I had, and whether I felt like cooking a bunch of food or not. If I had the time and desire to produce food for 30 people, I would calculate the approximate cost of the ingredients and tell her I will make the food but I need $x in order to do so. I don't mind putting in some of the money but I'm not going to fund the whole thing.

There would also be the understanding that food will be put into those disposable foil containers and if she wants a fancy serving set up, she needs to provide the serving dishes.

---

 You're nice.

---

 I can be.

I tend to drop the nice when people get demanding or expect me to do whatever it is. Her copping an attitude with me would be the quickest way to ensure that I won't do anything. I'm stubborn like that.

Would have told her to find a caterer.

How hard is it to order a few pizzas. Pick up a few bags of chips and containers of dip. Get a cake and ice cream.

And call it good?

The wife has a screw loose.

Asking a friend to cook dinner for thirty people?

Good grief. Who, in their right mind, does that?

That's crazy!

Fort Worth Mom wrote:

---

How hard is it to order a few pizzas. Pick up a few bags of chips and containers of dip. Get a cake and ice cream.

And call it good?

The wife has a screw loose.

Asking a friend to cook dinner for thirty people?

Good grief. Who, in their right mind, does that?

That's crazy!

---

 Here is the issue:  I can tell you honestly because SS's mom is a chef.  And a good one.

People come to her all the time and ask her, "Can you cater my daughter's birthday party?  You can just consider it your gift to her."  And they wanted a HUGE affair with an $80 cake alone.  She was just complaining Sunday because her next door neighbor and friend asked her to make a three tiered cake with pink and black fondant icing and fondant zoo animals.  That cake would normally cost over a hundred bucks.

We have a really nice bakery here in town.  She just does cakes but we have used her.  She is going out of business because she loves baking and wanted to have fun making things for people.  She says people have sucked the joy out of her work and she is so stressed out she's now losing hair. 

I don't think this is regional to my area.  I think people just feel way more entitled today.

I know it happens. I know it happens more than just to those people. On the mom's board I belong to mothers will post all the time... I need a three tiered cake for my child's first birthday. I need it in two days and I can only afford $20. Who can do this?

I see this post from different people almost daily. Wake up people. You can't go to Wal-Mart and get a sheet cake for that. And even there if you want something special you have to order ahead of time. People are entitled.

My BIL lives in Ireland and his love was cooking. He became a chef. He worked as a chef. He finally quit and became a nurse because people expected him to cook for their parties. He said it was exhausting.

And I have actually made a lot of the things SS's mom has done. I always tell her how much fun we had doing it. She always says, "That's because you were doing it for four people. I didn't have fun doing it for 400." Totally see her point there.

Tinydancer wrote:

---

Just say no. Why would you change your career when no is such an easy word?

---

 I don't either but some people are just not business people and don't know how to act as such with friends and relatives.  If it were me, I would tell them that we should meet so we can go over the menu and work up the estimate.  Do that a few times and only the serious ones who aren't trying to take advantage will follow through.

There are lots of jokes about people coming up to a doctor at a party or in a shop, describing their symptoms and asking for a diagnosis and a prescription.

The doctor could either say, "You'd better call my office immediately and make an appointment", or

"Take off all your clothes and I'll take a quick look."

 

 

Bonny22Pye wrote:

---

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

---

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

---

I know it happens. I know it happens more than just to those people. On the mom's board I belong to mothers will post all the time... I need a three tiered cake for my child's first birthday. I need it in two days and I can only afford $20. Who can do this?

I see this post from different people almost daily. Wake up people. You can't go to Wal-Mart and get a sheet cake for that. And even there if you want something special you have to order ahead of time. People are entitled.

My BIL lives in Ireland and his love was cooking. He became a chef. He worked as a chef. He finally quit and became a nurse because people expected him to cook for their parties. He said it was exhausting.

And I have actually made a lot of the things SS's mom has done. I always tell her how much fun we had doing it. She always says, "That's because you were doing it for four people. I didn't have fun doing it for 400." Totally see her point there.

---

 I see this a lot on local town FB sites; mothers asking for someone who can make a cake or such for a kids bday "that won't break the bank".  Have to wonder how those kids will turn out?  Entitled?  Probably.

---

 What happened to just making your kid a cake at home and putting some fun decorations on it?  I've made Gordito's cake both years now.  Box Cake Mix, Home made frosting.  Done and Done.

---

 I don't know.  I always ordered a sheet cake from the grocery store with decorations on it.  BUT, my kids birthdays are in March, April, and May.  So about mid April, which was usually when the weather was starting to get nice anyway, I threw a huge party for all of them.  They all played with the same kids.  Three parties was such a hassle.  We did Scooby Doo one year.  I just always picked gender neutral party themes.  Yeah yeah yeah, I said gender neutral.  I did a sheet cake and that was it.  A huge one.  I just invited family and their friends.  I would usually order pizza or make hot dogs.  We didn't have a smash cake or a photographer.  We didn't have pony rides or monogrammed birthday outfits.  I don't know how parents can even afford this chit these days.  Every birthday up until they are five has to have a monogrammed outfit with their name and age.  You have to have the professional pictures and some kind of animal entertainment.  Like a petting zoo or pony rides.  The other day I saw a lady saying she was throwing a full blown quincenara (probably spelled wrong) for her two year old.  I really had to scratch my head.

Mellow Momma wrote:

---

She was throwing a 15th birthday party for her 2 year old?!?!?!

---

 Yes.  Apparently you know and understand what that is.  In the Mexican culture it's a "coming out" party for the girl.  It is just as important to them as a girl's wedding.  I spent time learning the Mexican culture.  Not just on some American vacation destination but deep in the heart of Mexico living with a Mexican family.  I learned a lot about their culture.  They talked to me about how in Mexico it was unheard of for a woman to live alone.  She goes from her parents house to her husbands house.  So the "coming out" party is a huge deal.  And yes, this lady was throwing a coming out party for her two year old!

Mellow Momma wrote:

---

What a f***ing idiot

---

 Um yes.  These people spend the same kind of money on these parties as they do weddings.  A two year old won't even remember it!

And frankly, and I know I'm going to get bashed for it, but I don't get smash cakes.  I've seen women spend huge amounts of money on smash cakes.  Here's how I did it.  I cut mine a piece of the big cake and gave it to them.  Yeah, that's right.  I'm high falootin.

It's fun, it's cute, you snap a few pictures for posterity. I could not (literally and figuratively) have a child in this day and age.

from her actual birthday party

*Poof

ETA: That is not a special ordered shirt with a 1 on it. I got it on Zulily- and it ended up being free because they forgot the cute little pants that were supposed to go with it.

-- Edited by NAOW on Wednesday 24th of February 2016 10:13:09 PM

-- Edited by NAOW on Wednesday 24th of February 2016 10:25:12 PM

-- Edited by NAOW on Wednesday 24th of February 2016 10:25:51 PM

Mellow Momma wrote:

---

No flames. You just proved our point. You spent $80 on pics you didn't like as much as the pics you took at the party with the slice of cake. Exactly what we were saying.

And there is nothing wrong with taking milestone pictures. But by milestone, I don't mean every 30 days a professional photo shoot. There is a huge difference. I don't begrudge you a nice set of first birthday pics. It's the "my kids first fart" professional pics followed by my kid's "first outfit" professional pics, etc. It gets out of control with parents trying to keep up with each other and out do each other.

---

 To be fair, only the cake pictures didn't turn out well, all the others she took were adorable.

But I know it gets ridiculous, and I agree. I only did it because I saw a ad special on Facebook- and I have not been as good about taking pictures of DD1 as I was with DD8. 

Well, I am biased because I love your girls. I love watching them grow up. But yes. I am with MM when she talks about milestones and such. I am not against professional pictures per se. I just see some people who seem to hire a professional photographer to follow their child around and document their life. And honestly? While those shots are beautiful and look great in a baby book the ones you remember most are the ones where you snapped a candid picture of your daughter sleeping soundly in the crook of daddy's arm while he naps on the couch. Or the girls piled into bed with him reading a book. Some of those are the best moments to remember. But everyone should have some professional pictures though!

You have to understand what a coming out party is to the Mexican people to understand truly how crazy it is to have one for a two year old. It's like having a full blown wedding for a toddler. They hire bands, caterers, and photographers. It is a HUGE deal to them.

Oh I totally know what you guys are saying. I was just giving you a chance to make fun of me, lol.
A lot of photographers offer packages that include maternity, newborn, and either every month or every couples months (3,6,9) and then the one year old pictures. I don't even want to know how much those cost. I looked into newborn photos with a real photographer (not a facebook business like I did her 1st bday pics) and it started at $300- then you had to buy the pictures! They are adorable, but no thanks. I'll put that money into her college account instead.

The big fancy cakes- yes some people spend a ton of money on them, but I also know a lot of moms who make them themselves- people are getting good at it!