I read so much about how HS Sweethearts cant last. But there are at LEAST 10 HS couples of mine that are still married. DD is married to the same guy she "dated" as a Freshman.
My boss married his HS sweetheart 30 years ago. Other friends have been married 25 years or more.
I just dont understand the disdain for young couples.
__________________
America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...
I have a friend who married her first boyfriend and they have been married over 40 years. Both their kids married their first boyfriend/girlfriend and still going strong. My nephew married his very first girlfriend from jr high and they are still happily married. I'm so glad I didn't marry my first boyfriend...
I met DH when i was 17, in my first week of college. He was my first and only serious boyfriend. A friend of mine started dating her husband in 9th grade. They are still together and going strong.
A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
I didn't really date any one person in high school.
I was serial dater.
__________________
A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
Another take on HS sweethearts
I dated my knight when I was a HS sophomore, he was a senior. He was very mature, knew what he wanted from life. I was not ready for him. I wanted someone to grow up with and play with.
I bid him adieu.
He kept in touch over the years, briefly but often. I never thought of him as more than a friend. He married and had a lovely marriage of 40 years with 4 now adult kids, until his wife passed away 2 years ago.
I have had 2 divorces and one, now adult daughter.
When he reached out this time, he was too good to let go. We have connected on all levels. I cannot believe I am lucky enough to reconnect with him. We would not have worked back then, but we are what we both need now.
__________________
Minds are like parachutes, they work best when open
Sigh, wish I had stuck with my HS BF. He loved me so much. Life would have been different. My parents didn't poo poo young couples because in their generation that is how it typically happened, meeting your life mate that is.
__________________
Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
Sigh, wish I had stuck with my HS BF. He loved me so much. Life would have been different. My parents didn't poo poo young couples because in their generation that is how it typically happened, meeting your life mate that is.
I never assume they won't work. And there are actually studies that show people who get married LATER in life, after being totally established, have a more difficult time adjusting to marriage. They are so used to being independent and are set in their ways - it's difficult to adjust to merging a life with someone. Whereas, HS sweethearts only know life with each other - no difficult adjustment necessary.
__________________
LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
Sigh, wish I had stuck with my HS BF. He loved me so much. Life would have been different. My parents didn't poo poo young couples because in their generation that is how it typically happened, meeting your life mate that is.
What happened with your HS BF?
Broke up with him. He got very jealous one night while drinking. I had asked one of his friends to drive him home.
And so I wanted to see what else was out there. Come to find out, he was the one but I realized it too late.
__________________
Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
I married my high school sweetheart--almost 25 years ago, after dating for five years.
My youngest son married his.
I have absolutely no regrets.
However, while we all know many "success" stories, we also know some failures. I do think that too many times young people get entangled in that relationship as the be all end all of their existence and that's not always a good idea. It causes them to make poor decisions--get pregnant (or fail to prevent it), forego college or other plans they might have had (see the thread about Carolyn Hax losing her mind), ignore sage advice to "slow down".
__________________
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
I do agree with husker that all to many times the couple is more in love with the idea of being in love.
My nephew and his wife and a another young couple both knew in high school that they wanted to get married but both couples waited to finish college before they got married. All four has good jobs.
I know a handful of HS sweethearts that re still married after 30 years. My coworker married her first love when she was 16. She wasn't pregnant. They have been married almost 35 years.
I know a handful of HS sweethearts that re still married after 30 years. My coworker married her first love when she was 16. She wasn't pregnant. They have been married almost 35 years.
I know a ton. It's pretty common in small towns. I also know more than a few that are divorced, too.
Can I say a percentage? No, but nationally, the statistics show that people under age 25 when they marry divorce at higher rates than those who wait a bit.
__________________
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
Looks pretty accurate. Really high for those under 21 or 22, decreasing until 30 or just over, and then increasing again as people get older. Lots of 2nd and 3rd marriages and blended families in that last group.
__________________
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
Looks pretty accurate. Really high for those under 21 or 22, decreasing until 30 or just over, and then increasing again as people get older. Lots of 2nd and 3rd marriages and blended families in that last group.
Well, the chart is just for 1st marriages. But the article its from said that people who wait so much longer to get married the first time are not really prone to marriage in the first place.
__________________
LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
Sigh, wish I had stuck with my HS BF. He loved me so much. Life would have been different. My parents didn't poo poo young couples because in their generation that is how it typically happened, meeting your life mate that is.
What happened with your HS BF?
Broke up with him. He got very jealous one night while drinking. I had asked one of his friends to drive him home.
And so I wanted to see what else was out there. Come to find out, he was the one but I realized it too late.
I think there is a sweet spot for marriages. If you get too down far the road, people tend to get set in their ways. So, they aren't any better at marriage than the youngsters.
I know the love of my life was not the one I married and it only lasted about 4 years. But I am so glad I had that 4 years.
It was my magical relationship.
He and I are actually still friends and talk quite often.
But he moved to another state and I stayed here.
I think I'll always love him.
-- Edited by lilyofcourse on Tuesday 5th of April 2016 03:52:48 PM
__________________
A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
My mom was 16 when she started dating my dad. He had just returned from Korea.
Two years later, they married. Lasted until his death, sixty one years later.
My brother also married his high school sweetheart. They will celebrate their 39th year this summer. Oh, and they were 19 and 18 years old when they married.
__________________
I drink coffee so I don't kill you.
I quilt so I don't kill you.
Do you see a theme?
Faith isn't something that keeps bad things from happening. Faith is what helps us get through bad things when they do happen.
I think there is a sweet spot for marriages. If you get too down far the road, people tend to get set in their ways. So, they aren't any better at marriage than the youngsters.
yep.
__________________
Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
I think there is a sweet spot for marriages. If you get too down far the road, people tend to get set in their ways. So, they aren't any better at marriage than the youngsters.
This is true for me.
I can't imagine being in a relationship now. It seems like it would be exhausting.
I like my freedom.
Of course if God has other plans for me, so be it.
__________________
A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
I think there is a sweet spot for marriages. If you get too down far the road, people tend to get set in their ways. So, they aren't any better at marriage than the youngsters.
This is true for me.
I can't imagine being in a relationship now. It seems like it would be exhausting.
I like my freedom.
Of course if God has other plans for me, so be it.
I totally agree. I don't think I have the energy to date. Meeting someone and doing the courtship thing just sounds exhausting.
__________________
Out of all the lies I have told, "just kidding" is my favorite !