DEAR MISS MANNERS: Ten years ago -- yes, 10 years ago -- my son applied for a job at HotShot University. He did not get it. However, my husband was so sure he would get it that he told a friend about the application, which meant that my husband had to tell the friend later that our son did not get the job.
This friend's wife, who is sort of a "frenemy," has latched onto this information, and every time my son comes up in conversation, she manages to bring it up, saying things like, "Gee, it's a shame he didn't get that job at HotShot he wanted" -- as if everything he has accomplished has been for naught because of that.
I am really tired of this and have started pretending I don't know what she's talking about (did I mention it's been 10 years?), but I think she knows I am faking. What to do?
GENTLE READER: Tempting as it is to fight back -- "You know, it seemed like a disappointment at the time, but only imagine if he had gotten it. He would not have run for Congress, and he wouldn't be president today" -- the best course is to laugh.
Your friend's wife either means to hurt you or she is stunningly thoughtless. In either case, your finding it humorous that she still remembers it after 10 years is not the response she is looking for -- and should therefore discourage further repetitions. Miss Manners trusts that your husband, meanwhile, has learned his lesson several times over.
I think I would answer back "it kind of reminds me of the time your kid was caught drunk driving! I guess lots of things don't turn out the way we hoped". But it probably isn't the mannerly thing to say.
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Out of all the lies I have told, "just kidding" is my favorite !
I'd tell this "friend" to shut up. Tell her she's being a Bword and to shut up.
There is a difference between being gracious and being a punching bag.
It's ok to tell people like this to shove it.
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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
I think is tell her to stop or else I'm going to start bringing up every stupid embarrassing thing from her past and really embarrass her. I had a frenemy that used to do this to me. She thought it was so funny until I had enough and really embarrassed her a couple of times. It's a shame but some people don't learn any other way.
I think I would answer back "it kind of reminds me of the time your kid was caught drunk driving! I guess lots of things don't turn out the way we hoped". But it probably isn't the mannerly thing to say.
Bwwaahhh! Yep. Or, "Why are you so OBSESSED by this one particular thing? You have Issues!".
