DEAR ABBY: I have fought obesity all of my adult life, and my weight has yo-yoed over the years. My problem is, when I go to the doctor's office and I am taken to the exam area, the scale is right out in the open where other patients come and go as well as all the office personnel.
Mind you, I don't care if I am weighed in the presence of people walking around -- if they don't peek. However, when the medical assistant is done weighing me, she reads the scale out loud. I have felt humiliated when other patients are walking past. I have put up with this for years.
Recently, this medical assistant weighed me and I just knew she was going to "announce" my weight. This time there was a man I could tell was a patient, standing nearby at the reception window staring intently at me getting weighed. Because I was sure the M.A. was going to say it out loud, I started to cough to try to muffle the sound of her voice. It worked, but then she acted irritated because of my coughing, so she repeated it loudly. I was very embarrassed, to say the least. When the doctor saw me, I was afraid to say anything as I didn't want to get anybody in trouble.
I graduated from a medical assistant school many years ago and I remember the registered nurse who was our instructor taught us to never say out loud somebody's weight when you weigh him or her. It only makes common sense. I no longer want to go back to that doctor's office.
Do you have any advice for me when this happens again? I say again because it happens at other doctor's offices I visit as well. I am at a loss here. I would appreciate your input. -- STILL STINGING IN NEVADA
DEAR STILL STINGING: The first time it happened, you should have quietly mentioned to the medical assistant that she embarrassed you, and asked her please not to do it again. When it happened a second time, you should have spoken to the doctor about it. You are far from the only person who is sensitive about weight. If I were that physician, I'd certainly want to know why patients were disappearing from my practice. Wouldn't you?
Why the heck can't she tell whoever is weighing her in advance, that she would prefer that the weight is duly noted without having to say it out loud. Honestly, people can't get through life these days.
Oh look, another "I am too shy to tell someobne that they are doing something that makes me feel bad, so I am going to ask you how to handle the situation."
Oh look, another "I am too shy to tell someobne that they are doing something that makes me feel bad, so I am going to ask you how to handle the situation."
Exactly. SPEAK UP. How is anyone supposed to read your mind and just know you are upset?
__________________
LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
I've never understood why weight is something to be embarrassed over. It's just a number. If you're fat, it's already showing regardless of what the scale reads. If you're healthy, no reason to care what the scale says. Muscle weighs more than fat anyway.
Years ago, I won a stuffed animal at a 'Guess Your Weight' booth. A female bystander told me I had a lot of guts to get on that scale with so many people watching. To this day, I don't understand her reaction. Bravery never factored into it and I never gave the crowd a thought.
I've never understood why weight is something to be embarrassed over. It's just a number. If you're fat, it's already showing regardless of what the scale reads. If you're healthy, no reason to care what the scale says. Muscle weighs more than fat anyway.
Years ago, I won a stuffed animal at a 'Guess Your Weight' booth. A female bystander told me I had a lot of guts to get on that scale with so many people watching. To this day, I don't understand her reaction. Bravery never factored into it and I never gave the crowd a thought.
It IS just a number, but it's also a trigger for some people.
I've never understood why weight is something to be embarrassed over. It's just a number. If you're fat, it's already showing regardless of what the scale reads. If you're healthy, no reason to care what the scale says. Muscle weighs more than fat anyway.
Years ago, I won a stuffed animal at a 'Guess Your Weight' booth. A female bystander told me I had a lot of guts to get on that scale with so many people watching. To this day, I don't understand her reaction. Bravery never factored into it and I never gave the crowd a thought.
It IS just a number, but it's also a trigger for some people.
I make a big deal before I step on the scale. Remove most of my clothing that would be considered acceptable, included my shoes, ask the nurse to hold my purse, etc., take a deep breath, and slowly step on. By the the time my weight is registered the nurse is laughing too hard to announce my weight.
Really, all she has to say is "repeat my weight out loud and I will cut you."
I make a big deal before I step on the scale. Remove most of my clothing that would be considered acceptable, included my shoes, ask the nurse to hold my purse, etc., take a deep breath, and slowly step on. By the the time my weight is registered the nurse is laughing too hard to announce my weight.
Really, all she has to say is "repeat my weight out loud and I will cut you."
Honestly, I've thought about turning backwards so I don't see the numbers...
No matter our size, there are still things that women want kept private.
I remember taking my mother to the hospital when she broke her arm. If I had to guess, I'd say she weighs at least 200 lbs. She refuses to get on scales, even at the doctor's office. So when the nurse asked her her weight so she could give her something for the pain, I almost choked when she said 120 lbs. My father looked at me and all I could say was, "well, we don't have to worry about her overdosing."
I weighed 115 before I got pregnant. When I was at the OB I told them I never wanted them to tell me what my weight was. Ever. If they needed to tell me to gain more or gain less that was fine but I wanted NO numbers in my head. Worked like a charm. All the nurses understood. The doctor thought it was a great idea - too many people get hung up on what the number is and not if they are healthy or not.
__________________
Out of all the lies I have told, "just kidding" is my favorite !
I weighed 115 before I got pregnant. When I was at the OB I told them I never wanted them to tell me what my weight was. Ever. If they needed to tell me to gain more or gain less that was fine but I wanted NO numbers in my head. Worked like a charm. All the nurses understood. The doctor thought it was a great idea - too many people get hung up on what the number is and not if they are healthy or not.
One of my OB's NPs was the first one to see me when I got pregnant. She told me she wanted me to gain 20 lbs over the course of the pregnancy. Next time she saw me, I was in my third trimester and had only gained 5 lbs. She told me I'm too fat, the baby will have complications, and I need to stop gaining weight. I reminded her that she said 20 lbs in the beginning and I had only gained 5. She lectured me on gestational diabetes (which I did not have) and said my baby could die. That was the last time I saw her. I refused to be examined by her any further. I complained to my OB and he said I'm doing great, right where I need to be, and my baby is just fine. He was too. Scored a 9 on both APGARs and is growing like a weed.
I make a big deal before I step on the scale. Remove most of my clothing that would be considered acceptable, included my shoes, ask the nurse to hold my purse, etc., take a deep breath, and slowly step on. By the the time my weight is registered the nurse is laughing too hard to announce my weight.
Really, all she has to say is "repeat my weight out loud and I will cut you."
Well, I'm glad I'm not the only one that does this. I went the other day and was actually thinking about this. I said to myself, "I wonder if I'm the only person who unloads their pockets before they get on the scale?" I take out my keys, cell phone, sunglasses...
__________________
“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!” ― Maya Angelou
Last time I was at the Dr, the nurse told me to step on the scales and I said, "No thank you". I was kidding. She just said OK and turned toward the examination rooms. I laughed and told her that I was kidding and she said that they have several patients that refuse to step on scales. I was shocked.
__________________
America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...
“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!” ― Maya Angelou
I've never had them announce my weight. I can see the numbers. They write it down. And it's never been even brought up by the doctor except for a couple times I brought it up
The number on the scale means nothing. You can be overweight but fit and you can be skinny on the outside but "fat" on the inside.
I've probably told this story before, but I was in high school...5'4" and 120 pounds. My maternal grandmother made me go to Weight Watchers. It was a joke. A group of old(er) ladies and one messed-up shy high school kid.
One girl that my DD went to high school with back in Ohio was very very wealthy. All the kids admired her and wished they could be her. She was involved in a lot of activities that DD was and I got to know the girl quite well. Her mom gave her work out clothes and a year membership to Weight Watchers for Christmas one year. Poor thing. She took her mom's credit card and went out and bought her own Christmas presents after Christmas. She said "it's bad enough that my mom thinks I am fat and bought this stuff for me, but everyone in school will be asking me what I got for Christmas and I can't tell them."
She got a BMW for her 16th bday. Her gifts were legendary. The whole school would have been trying to find out what she got. I felt terrible for her. All she wanted was some love.
__________________
Out of all the lies I have told, "just kidding" is my favorite !
One girl that my DD went to high school with back in Ohio was very very wealthy. All the kids admired her and wished they could be her. She was involved in a lot of activities that DD was and I got to know the girl quite well. Her mom gave her work out clothes and a year membership to Weight Watchers for Christmas one year. Poor thing. She took her mom's credit card and went out and bought her own Christmas presents after Christmas. She said "it's bad enough that my mom thinks I am fat and bought this stuff for me, but everyone in school will be asking me what I got for Christmas and I can't tell them."
She got a BMW for her 16th bday. Her gifts were legendary. The whole school would have been trying to find out what she got. I felt terrible for her. All she wanted was some love.
Put the ice cream cake between the cookies and have an ice cream cake sandwich!
__________________
“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!” ― Maya Angelou