TOTALLY GEEKED!

Not everyone is cut out for watching infants. If he isn't, then she needs to recognize that. Could they put the kids in daycare for a couple hours a day just to break up the day ? Paternity leave at 7 months? Wow.

I have heard of paternity leave when the child is born, but not 7 months along....I wonder what country she lives in, because this might be the norm in socialist countries.

At any rate, I was stressed when the boys were that young, although 7 months is a pretty easy age. Not old enough to walk/talk, but old enough to eat solids and sleep. The key is putting them on a schedule. Sleep schedule, eat schedule. I used to really look forward to those 2 hour naps in the morning and afternoon.

Maybe instead of yelling at the preschooler he would get up off his ass and direct the child. I find that getting on their level, telling them "no" or "do not" while physically removing the object or the child from the situation is much more effective than yelling orders the child does not understand. Heck, I still do that with boys, although I admit I do my fair share of yelling, too, mostly because they are too focused on each other and don't hear me when I'm talking.

Why does a preschooler need to be in preschool? I didnt' put my kids in preschool.

Every kindergarten teacher I've ever spoken to says they can immediately see a difference between the children that have been to preschool and those that haven't. If you are getting them ready for kindergarten and doing enough other social things, fine. But too many parents don't.

There are some kindergarten students that don't even know their shapes or colors going in.

There is no way Bunny would have made it in Kindergarten without preschool. I think it should be a requirement these days.
They had him diagraming sentences before the end of the year! I remember learning that in second grade.
I can't imagine a child who doesn't yet know the alphabet, number, colors, shapes, etc. would be able to handle the Kindergarten curriculum.

When I was a kid, kindergarten was optional.

And there was maybe 2 kindergarten classes in each school district.

Now, kids are reading and doing basic math in kindergarten.

lilyofcourse wrote:

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6 months of maternity leave?

That's a lot of leave.

Is that normal?

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 It depends on the firm. Lots of big companies that want to retain their talent give amazing amounts of leave to both parents. 

So, no. It isn't normal.

6 weeks is more normal.

I had one employee that came back after 7 days.

6 weeks is typically what you get paid out in disability once you have given birth. But that is not the same as leave. Not even close.

No one I know ever got disability or paid maternity leave.

So that isn't normal either.

But then again, normal is relative.

So what it is normal in one person's experience is not normal in another's.

It is interesting though.

Heck, I went back to work 9 days after my second heart attack.

Had bills to pay.

That seems more reasonable.

6 months just seems like a long time.

Most place give 6 weeks here. Some paid, some not. Some companies (bigger companies that fall under FMLA) give 12 but the last 6 are usually not paid, they just hold your job.When I worked I was extremely lucky to get 12, the first 6 paid in full and the last at 80% pay.

Everywhere I've encountered has offered Short Term Disability for maternity leave. 6 weeks vaginal birth, 8 weeks C-Section.

DD got 6 weeks paid 100% when the kids were born. Then she had the option of FMLA, 6 additional months, but not paid. She took 3. By law, they could not fire her or reduce her salary.

Why I had my hysterectomy, my STD paid my salary. I was out 12 weeks. Got 100%.

lilyofcourse wrote:

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No one I know ever got disability or paid maternity leave.

So that isn't normal either.

But then again, normal is relative.

So what it is normal in one person's experience is not normal in another's.

It is interesting though.

Heck, I went back to work 9 days after my second heart attack.

Had bills to pay.

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 If a doctor has not cleared you to go back to work (and most won't until the first checkup at least) then you qualify for disability. However part time jobs don't typically pay disability. It's usually just management jobs. 

Mellow Momma wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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No one I know ever got disability or paid maternity leave.

So that isn't normal either.

But then again, normal is relative.

So what it is normal in one person's experience is not normal in another's.

It is interesting though.

Heck, I went back to work 9 days after my second heart attack.

Had bills to pay.

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 If a doctor has not cleared you to go back to work (and most won't until the first checkup at least) then you qualify for disability. However part time jobs don't typically pay disability. It's usually just management jobs. 

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 BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

1st. I was a manager. Worked 50+hours a week.

2nd, you've obviously never gone through the process of trying to get disability. 

 

lilyofcourse wrote:

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Mellow Momma wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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No one I know ever got disability or paid maternity leave.

So that isn't normal either.

But then again, normal is relative.

So what it is normal in one person's experience is not normal in another's.

It is interesting though.

Heck, I went back to work 9 days after my second heart attack.

Had bills to pay.

---

 If a doctor has not cleared you to go back to work (and most won't until the first checkup at least) then you qualify for disability. However part time jobs don't typically pay disability. It's usually just management jobs. 

---

 BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

1st. I was a manager. Worked 50+hours a week.

2nd, you've obviously never gone through the process of trying to get disability. 

 

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 Lily ... Not government disability. Disability through your employer. Wow. Disability insurance offered through your employer will cover you. 

I will await your apology for laughing at me. 

Mellow Momma wrote:

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To clarify its called "short term disability insurance" and every major employer offers it - even most small employers offer it. It costs them next to nothing.

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 Yes, I have it.

I was just wondering why not unemployment insurance...do you have that? 

apple wrote:

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Mellow Momma wrote:

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To clarify its called "short term disability insurance" and every major employer offers it - even most small employers offer it. It costs them next to nothing.

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 Yes, I have it.

I was just wondering why not unemployment insurance...do you have that? 

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 Unemployment insurance - yes we do. It's for lay offs and such though. If you get fired you won't get it. 

At one point, and I'm not sure if this is still the case, employers were required to cover 6 weeks of "disability" pay to new mothers, 8 if they underwent a c-section. It was the law.

Unemployment insurance kicks in when you are unemployed. Title VII prevents employers from discriminating on the basis of childbirth or pregnancy. In other words, they can't fire you for having a baby. So you still have a job, you aren't unemployed, and you would not be eligible for unemployment benefits.

lilyofcourse wrote:

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You can wait till the cows come home.

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 Well that's nice. Why is it so hard for you to admit you were mistaken about something ? 

Mellow Momma wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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You can wait till the cows come home.

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 Well that's nice. Why is it so hard for you to admit you were mistaken about something ? 

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 When I'm wrong, I'll admit it.

 

We didn't get a chance to find out what the company DH worked for at the time when DS born would've done. He had just handed in his 2 weeks notice since he was starting a new job soon after the new year. I went into labor the day after he submitted his notice and his company told him to go ahead and take the rest of the time off so he be with me and our son.

Lawyerlady wrote:

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I've never had a job that provided short term disability insurance. I do not have it now.

I think too many people think THEIR experience, or what their company does, is the norm. Not every company provides it, and there are a LOT of companies that have less than 50 employees where the Family Leave Act does not apply, and whether an employer is required to provide STD varies by state - in fact, only FIVE require it.

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 Your employer is being unnecessarily stingy. It costs next to nothing to provide. When you get the suite of insurance from a provider - health insurance, life insurance, etc - they toss it in as a "freebie" of sorts. It costs our business less than $200 a month to provide it for 45 employees (the full time employees only) Kind of a no brainer, if you are interested in providing a nice benefits package. $4 per person per month is pennies. 

 

The point being made was short term disability is not the same as government disability. They are different animals. 

-- Edited by Mellow Momma on Thursday 28th of July 2016 10:11:17 AM

Many, many companies cut costs when the economy tanked and do not offer the same benefits they once did. And for smaller companies - it costs them more for every benefit they provide and even small increases can be burdensome

And my company is not stingy - it covers our medical insurance 100% without employee contribution and that cost has increased substantially since the Obamacare debacle. Because of that, it has to keep the costs down.