DEAR ABBY: My husband has become very overweight, which has caused his sex drive -- as well as his health -- to suffer. I worry about him constantly, and I miss the intimacy we used to have. He is aware of how I feel and started trying to eat healthier. He also tries to exercise at least a little bit every day.
The problem is he constantly falls off the wagon. Sometimes he says he's too tired to exercise, or he reverts back to his old habits and ends up eating fast food. He always tries again the next day, but he won't make much progress at the rate he's going.
I don't want to nag him to death, but I do want him around for a long time. What can I say that will make him take this more seriously? -- ALL ABOUT HEALTH IN ALABAMA
DEAR ALL ABOUT HEALTH: Tell your husband how much you love him, and that you're afraid "until death do us part" will happen prematurely if he continues killing himself with his fork and his sedentary ways. You might also recite the names of the various diseases that accompany obesity in most people.
But if your husband's doctor hasn't been able to get the message through to him, there isn't much more you can do besides love him for the wonderful husband he is and keep your fingers crossed. I say this because the only person who can "make" your husband commit to a diet and exercise program is himself, with the recognition that changing his unhealthy patterns probably won't be easy and will take time.
Remove temptation from the home and cook better meals. That's a good start anyway. And think of fun things to do on weekends or evenings which require getting up off the couch.
It's like anything else, until he is good and ready to change, he wont.
However, making lifestyle changes for both of them will benefit them.
Small things, one change at a time.
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Bad habits are hard to break and she should keep trying to encourage him and maybe even change the way she eats too and exercise along with him. I realize he is the one who is responsible for his bad eating habits but it helps when you are not alone.