TOTALLY GEEKED!

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

RE: Terminally ill woman who intends to end her life posts new video about her condition

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Southern_Belle wrote:
That hurt my brain.

LGS has that talent!

biggrin

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

wink

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

But you'll get used to it...

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Advanced directives only come into play if you are unable to communicate your wishes. If you are conscious and screaming in pain, you have the ability to express your wishes.
As a lawyer i would think u would recommend people get that in place. Illness often comes upon someone like a thief in the night. So either make sure its in place or leave it up to your family.

I do advise you get it into place. In our state - you elect one person to make the decision for you and then choose what options you would like them to choose regarding end of life care. BUT, advanced directives are only valid in cases of permanent unconsciousness or terminal illness where you are not able to express your wishes yourself.

Oh, and they are not valid at all if you are pregnant.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 2nd of November 2014 08:45:24 AM

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Advanced directives only come into play if you are unable to communicate your wishes. If you are conscious and screaming in pain, you have the ability to express your wishes.
As a lawyer i would think u would recommend people get that in place. Illness often comes upon someone like a thief in the night. So either make sure its in place or leave it up to your family.
I do advise you get it into place. In our state - you elect one person to make the decision for you and then choose what options you would like them to choose regarding end of life care. BUT, advanced directives are only valid in cases of permanent unconsciousness or terminal illness where you are not able to express your wishes yourself.

Oh, and they are not valid at all if you are pregnant.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 2nd of November 2014 08:45:24 AM

Yes. Isn't that kind of the point? When you are in a state of being unable to choose your treatment options that it is clearly spelled out? I think it is important to do this for a couple of reasons. First, it takes some of the pressure off your loved ones in making those decisions. It is spelled out. And, yes, we have all probably had those conversations with our loved ones, but if they are non medical people, they often don't really understand what is meant by comfort care or life saving treatments and all those shades of grey inbetween. It also gives them comfort and would help alleviate any guilt trips they might get from other family members demanding that everything must be done. And, you don't always have the ability to appoint someone. If you go down in an emergency, whatever family member is there is probably going to be the one making the decisions, not necessarily whom you would want.

In addition, there are people who can't or won't let go. And, even if you have spoken to them ad nauseaum, they just can't say No to further treatments. Having the proper documentation in place gives you much more assurance that your wishes will be followed.

So, why as a lawyer you are less than enthusiastic about that, I can't fathom.

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Advanced directives only come into play if you are unable to communicate your wishes. If you are conscious and screaming in pain, you have the ability to express your wishes.
As a lawyer i would think u would recommend people get that in place. Illness often comes upon someone like a thief in the night. So either make sure its in place or leave it up to your family.
I do advise you get it into place. In our state - you elect one person to make the decision for you and then choose what options you would like them to choose regarding end of life care. BUT, advanced directives are only valid in cases of permanent unconsciousness or terminal illness where you are not able to express your wishes yourself.

Oh, and they are not valid at all if you are pregnant.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 2nd of November 2014 08:45:24 AM

That's too bad. I've seen cases where bad things happen. Once baby is out there are tough decisions to be made sometimes.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Southern_Belle wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Advanced directives only come into play if you are unable to communicate your wishes. If you are conscious and screaming in pain, you have the ability to express your wishes.
As a lawyer i would think u would recommend people get that in place. Illness often comes upon someone like a thief in the night. So either make sure its in place or leave it up to your family.
I do advise you get it into place. In our state - you elect one person to make the decision for you and then choose what options you would like them to choose regarding end of life care. BUT, advanced directives are only valid in cases of permanent unconsciousness or terminal illness where you are not able to express your wishes yourself.

Oh, and they are not valid at all if you are pregnant.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 2nd of November 2014 08:45:24 AM
That's too bad. I've seen cases where bad things happen. Once baby is out there are tough decisions to be made sometimes.

Once baby is out, you are no longer pregnant.

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

True!

huskerbb · Guru

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I think everyone should have Advanced Directives.

But an advanced directive does not allow them to "kill" you. They can withhold certain treatments--but they can't give you a shot to "put you down".

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Of course. I understand that. If you want to be "put down', at this point, the medical system is not really able to put you down on your terms. Soooo, I would assume that even if you wanted it to end, that you would still want an Advanced Directive so you are not prolonged with tube feedings or whatever else you don't want.

Vette · Owl drink to that!

I have an advanced directive regarding my mental health, I don't know if that also applies to my physical health?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I have never heard of an Advanced Directive solely for mental health?

Vette · Owl drink to that!

I don't know anything about it I just know they made me do one when I was at the mental hospital

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

OH, ok. I did google that and saw that. And, I think it varys from State to state too.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Of course. I understand that. If you want to be "put down', at this point, the medical system is not really able to put you down on your terms. Soooo, I would assume that even if you wanted it to end, that you would still want an Advanced Directive so you are not prolonged with tube feedings or whatever else you don't want.

But some states do allow physician-assisted suicide. I believe that's why the OP moved.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I think everyone should have Advanced Directives.
But an advanced directive does not allow them to "kill" you. They can withhold certain treatments--but they can't give you a shot to "put you down".

But they can withdraw care and life support. And they can direct a DNR.

Ohfour · Hooker

She ended her life today after a turn for the worse...

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

May she rest in peace. It is tragic no matter how you view it

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Ohfour wrote:
She ended her life today after a turn for the worse...

That is sad news. But I am glad she was able to pass on her terms.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.

PotteryChick · Member

She was a brave person.

PotteryChick · Member

lilyofcourse wrote:
And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.

What do you mean? Like if she could say what death is like?

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

I know someone said up thread that maybe her death was meant to teach her family some sort of lesson.

I hereby make it known I don't want to learn any damn lesson that requires my child to die an angonizing death. Nope. No thank you. No matter what.

PotteryChick · Member

Mellow Momma wrote:
I know someone said up thread that maybe her death was meant to teach her family some sort of lesson.

I hereby make it known I don't want to learn any damn lesson that requires my child to die an angonizing death. Nope. No thank you. No matter what.

I agree with you. The thought of my child suffering fills me with horror. I don't believe there is any nobility in suffering.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
She ended her life today after a turn for the worse...
That is sad news. But I am glad she was able to pass on her terms.

I dont see anything to be " glad" of. We are now missing the light and glow that another human being brought to the planet.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
I know someone said up thread that maybe her death was meant to teach her family some sort of lesson.

I hereby make it known I don't want to learn any damn lesson that requires my child to die an angonizing death. Nope. No thank you. No matter what.

If you want to try to twist my words then be my guest.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

I am not glad she is dead obviously. If you read my post, I said I was glad she was able to pass on her terms.

Clearly I don't wish anyone dead. I do wish for everyone to have a death free of pain.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I once took care of a young woman who was in a vegetative state. It was the saddest story. They had a small baby. He was about a year old I think. One day she complained of a really bad headache. She went to lay down and never woke up. When the husband found her and rushed her to the hospital they found she had a brain tumor that had totally taken over her brain. Her husband used to come up and visit every day. Sometimes when the baby got fussy I'd take him to the nursing station and let him play with blank paper and markers. I don't know what happened to that lady. They moved her to a long term care unit somewhere.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Wow that's so sad NJN. Poor baby.

My greatest fear was that I would die while my children were little and they wouldn't remember me. Thankfully, I think I have made it past that point! But that poor baby, to never know his mother alive and loving him.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

It was sad. And the husband... He loved her so much. You could just tell the pain in his face. It was horrible. He would sit by her bed and hold her hand. I know at some point he probably moved on and found happiness but I still think about them sometimes.

NAOW · Vette's SS

This thread is making me cry.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I've seen some really sad things in my career NAOW.

NAOW · Vette's SS

I can imagine. I'm so sorry.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Thanks. Sometimes it was hard. You don't always click with every patient. That doesn't mean you don't provide them with good care. You do. And there's a lot of patients you really like. But there's always a few that really really really touch you and get to you for some reason or another. It's not that they're special per se... it's just that something about them gets to you. I don't know if that makes sense.

ed11563 · Guru

PotteryChick wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
I know someone said up thread that maybe her death was meant to teach her family some sort of lesson.

I hereby make it known I don't want to learn any damn lesson that requires my child to die an angonizing death. Nope. No thank you. No matter what.
I agree with you. The thought of my child suffering fills me with horror. I don't believe there is any nobility in suffering.

People try to find a "silver lining" in lots of terrible things.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.

Her family supported her decision. They loved her and did not want her to suffer.

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

PotteryChick wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.
What do you mean? Like if she could say what death is like?

No. Would she rather have her suffering now. Was it worth an eternity in hell? She killed herself. That is a violation of the 10 commandments. Unless she was able to ask forgiveness in the last of it, she is not better off this morning. Quite the contrary.

And before any of you want to flame me for this, remember you asked.

As for her family supporting her, doesn't mean they are happy about it. Doesn't mean they are at peace with it. Could be just the opposite now that it is over and done.

This one act that is being deemed as brave and courageous is going to have reverberating affects for years to come.

This is not something to celebrate or a cause to champion. This is incredibly sad. And will become a tool for the proponents of death to parade around.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
PotteryChick wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.
What do you mean? Like if she could say what death is like?
No. Would she rather have her suffering now. Was it worth an eternity in hell? She killed herself. That is a violation of the 10 commandments. Unless she was able to ask forgiveness in the last of it, she is not better off this morning. Quite the contrary.
And before any of you want to flame me for this, remember you asked.
As for her family supporting her, doesn't mean they are happy about it. Doesn't mean they are at peace with it. Could be just the opposite now that it is over and done.
This one act that is being deemed as brave and courageous is going to have reverberating affects for years to come.
This is not something to celebrate or a cause to champion. This is incredibly sad. And will become a tool for the proponents of death to parade around.

I disagree with every word you typed.

We are going to "flame" you, but you like that. It makes you feel so righteous...

She is NOT in Hell, she is at peace. What parent would want their child to needlessly suffer? To bear agonizing pain? You argue quantity of life, while many of us argue QUALITY.

I am a proponent of CHOICE. In the end, it WAS her choice.

flan

PotteryChick · Member

Omg. I'm sorry that I asked. It's sad that you believe that but I know you aren't the only one.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
PotteryChick wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
And now that she is gone, I wonder what she would say now. If she could.

I hope her family can find peace and comfort with this.
What do you mean? Like if she could say what death is like?
No. Would she rather have her suffering now. Was it worth an eternity in hell? She killed herself. That is a violation of the 10 commandments. Unless she was able to ask forgiveness in the last of it, she is not better off this morning. Quite the contrary.
And before any of you want to flame me for this, remember you asked.
As for her family supporting her, doesn't mean they are happy about it. Doesn't mean they are at peace with it. Could be just the opposite now that it is over and done.
This one act that is being deemed as brave and courageous is going to have reverberating affects for years to come.
This is not something to celebrate or a cause to champion. This is incredibly sad. And will become a tool for the proponents of death to parade around.

I disagree with every word you typed.
We are going to "flame" you, but you like that. It makes you feel so righteous...
She is NOT in Hell, she is at peace. What parent would want their child to needlessly suffer? To bear agonizing pain? You argue quantity of life, while many of us argue QUALITY.
I am a proponent of CHOICE. In the end, it WAS her choice.
flan

You want to flame me because you don't want to believe that there IS life after death and you WILL be in either Heaven or Hell. You don't like that.

And I didn't say she was for sure. I said UNLESS she asked for forgiveness she is. And thus I bet she has a completely different opinion of her choice now.

As for her family, no. No one wants to see their child suffer. But I highly doubt you could help your child die and not have a problem with that for the rest of your life. I know I couldn't. Even when a child dies naturally the parent wonders what they could have done different, Did they do everything they could.

Yes. We know you are pro death.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

STOP PUTTING WORDS IN MY MOUTH, LILY.

Pro-choice does not equal pro-death...except to you & husker, who see the world in black & white.

Yes, I could help my child die & be at peace with my decision.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

No. You really don't know that. None of us do.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

End of life decisions are very fuzzy and grey. It usually isn't clear. It is a process. Deciding when to end treatments, support, etc. Those decisions aren't made in a vacuum.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

flan327 wrote:
STOP PUTTING WORDS IN MY MOUTH, LILY.

Pro-choice does not equal pro-death...except to you & husker, who see the world in black & white.

Yes, I could help my child die & be at peace with my decision.

flan

I am not putting words in your mouth. You constantly say you support all kinds of death by choice. So that makes you pro death.

And if you could help kill your child and have no qualms about it, well that is a very sad thing for a mother to say. Very sad.

As for my world, my world is full of color. Full spectrum of color.

But right will always be right and wrong will always be wrong.

Squeakers · Regular

I regret not helping my grandfather end his suffering, if it makes you feel better flan.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Squeakers wrote:
I regret not helping my grandfather end his suffering, if it makes you feel better flan.

I'm fine, hon, but thanks.

I wish I could have taken my father out of the last nursing home & brought him to my house. The only thing he wanted, at that point, was to be with Mom. My brother thought he knew best...

flan

Dona Worry Be Happy · Vette's SS!!

Lily, your idea of God sounds cruel and sadistic. A God that would punish this young woman with eternity in hell is not a God I could worship.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
Lily, your idea of God sounds cruel and sadistic. A God that would punish this young woman with eternity in hell is not a God I could worship.

Killing yourself is a sin. Sin will not enter into Heaven.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

God is bigger than Suicide Lilly. You are saying that all that matters is your LAST act on earth?