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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Comfort Food: No one brings dinner when your daughter is an addict.
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Comfort Food

No one brings dinner when your daughter is an addict.

By Larry M. Lake

 

 
131107_family_addictIllo

Illustration by Robert Neubecker

When my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, we ate well. Mary Beth and I had both read the terrifying pathology report of a tumor the size of an olive. The surgical digging for lymph nodes was followed by months of radiation. We ate very well.

 

Friends drove Mary Beth to her radiation sessions and sometimes to her favorite ice cream shop on the half-hour drive back from the hospital. She always ordered a chocolate malt. Extra thick.

Our family feasted for months on the lovingly prepared dishes brought by friends from work and church and the neighborhood: chicken breasts encrusted with parmesan, covered safely in tin foil; pots of thick soup with hearty bread; bubbling pans of lasagna and macaroni and cheese. There were warm home-baked rolls in tea towel–covered baskets, ham with dark baked pineapple rings, scalloped potatoes, and warm pies overflowing with the syrups of cherries or apples.

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Leftovers piled up in the refrigerator, and soon the freezer filled up too, this tsunami of food offerings an edible symbol of our community’s abundant generosity.

Although few said the word breast unless it belonged to a chicken, many friends were familiar with the word cancer and said it often, without flinching. They asked how we were doing, sent notes and cards, passed along things they’d read about treatments and medications, emailed links to good recovery websites and the titles of helpful books, called frequently, placed gentle if tentative hands on shoulders, spoke in low and warm tones, wondered if we had enough food. The phrase we heard most was: “If there’s anything I can do ... ”

In the following months, after Mary Beth had begun speaking in full sentences again and could stay awake for an entire meal, the stored foods in the freezer ran out, and we began cooking on our own again. Our children, Nick and Maggie, sometimes complained jokingly about our daily fare. “Someone should get cancer so we can eat better food,” they’d say. And we actually laughed. 

* * *

Almost a decade later, our daughter, Maggie, was admitted to a psychiatric hospital and diagnosed with bipolar disorder, following years of secret alcohol and drug abuse.

No warm casseroles.

At 19, she was arrested for drug possession, faced a judge, and was placed on a probation program. Before her hearings, we ate soup and grilled cheese in a restaurant near the courthouse, mere booths away from the lawyers, police officers, and court clerks she might later see.

No scalloped potatoes in tinfoil pans.

This question is rarely heard: “How’s your depression these days?”

Maggie was disciplined by her college for breaking the drug and alcohol rules. She began an outpatient recovery program. She took a medical leave from school. She was admitted to a psychiatric hospital, diagnosed, released. She began years of counseling, recovery meetings, and intensive outpatient rehabilitation. She lived in a recovery house, relapsed, then spent seven weeks in a drug and alcohol addiction treatment center.

No soup, no homemade loaves of bread.

 

Maggie progressed well at the treatment center. When the insurance coverage on inpatient treatment ran out for the year, she was transferred to a “partial house” where she and other women slept at night then were returned by van to the facility for full days of recovery sessions, meals, volleyball games, counseling, and horticultural therapy. This daughter who once stayed as far away from my garden as possible lest I catch a whiff of my stolen whiskey on her breath was now planting a garden herself, arranging painted rocks around an angel statue donated by a counselor, carrying buckets of water to nurture impatiens, petunia, delphinium, and geranium.

Friends talk about cancer and other physical maladies more easily than about psychological afflictions. Breasts might draw blushes, but brains are unmentionable. These questions are rarely heard: “How’s your depression these days?” “What improvements do you notice now that you have treatment for your ADD?” “Do you find your manic episodes are less intense now that you are on medication?” “What does depression feel like?” “Is the counseling helpful?” A much smaller circle of friends than those who’d fed us during cancer now asked guarded questions. No one ever showed up at our door with a meal.

We drove nearly five hours round trip each Sunday for our one weekly visiting hour. The sustenance of food, candy, and fiction were forbidden as gifts to patients at the treatment center. Instead, we brought Maggie cigarettes, sketchbooks, colored pencils, and phone cards. Any beef roasts or spaghetti dinners we ate were ones we’d prepared ourselves or bought in a restaurant on the long road to the center.

Then, late one night in June, Maggie and another patient were riding in the treatment center’s van on the way back to their house after a full day of the hard work of addiction recovery. The number of patients in the partial house had diminished from six a few days before, after a scandal involving small bags of ground coffee some smuggled from the house to the center and sold as though it were cocaine to addicts craving real coffee. (The center, like many, served only decaf.) Dozing off and comfortable in the seat behind the driver, Maggie might have been thinking of those coffee dealers who had been returned to the main facility or dismissed. Or maybe she was thinking about the upcoming wedding of her brother, Nick. A light pink bridesmaid’s dress waited in her closet at our house. Her release from the center was scheduled for two days before she and Mary Beth were to fly to Wisconsin for the wedding.

That night, an oncoming speeding car hit the van head-on.

The medics radioed for helicopters, and soon the air over Chester County, Pa., was full of them, four coming from Philadelphia, Coatesville, and Wilmington, one for each patient. The accident site was soon a garish roadside attraction of backboards, neck braces, IV tubes, oxygen tanks, gurneys, strobing lights, the deep thumping of helicopter blades, and the whine of turbines.

A newspaper picture later showed five firefighters, all in full gear, lifting a woman from a van—only her feet and an edge of the backboard visible. The van’s roof, dark and torn and jagged in the picture, had been removed by hydraulic cutters while the huddled victims, Maggie unconscious among them, were carefully covered with blankets. One of her front teeth lay in a puddle of blood on the ground.

When we saw her in the hospital, her face was a swollen mass of stitches, bruises, and torn flesh. Brown dried blood was still caked in her ears. Mary Beth carefully cleaned it with a licked paper towel, as if she were gently wiping Maggie’s face of grape jelly smudges or white donut powder just before Sunday school. At first, Maggie only remembered headlights, but soon she would mention “a cute EMS tech waking me up,” and the muffled chattering of helicopters.

The day she was released from the hospital, Maggie insisted on returning to the rehab center to complete her program, a heroine in a wheelchair among heroin addicts and alcoholics. On the way there, we stopped at a restaurant for lunch,  where Maggie ate mashed potatoes, a little soup, and sucked a mango smoothie through a straw held carefully where her tooth was missing. Back at the center, we rolled her out to see her garden.

While Maggie was in the hospital, cards and letters filled our mailbox at home. For the two weeks that Maggie remained in rehab, and even while she flew to the Midwest, then wore her pink dress at Nick’s wedding and danced triumphantly with her cousins, offers of food crackled from our answering machine and scrolled out on email: “If there’s anything I can do ... ”

Larry M. Lake

 

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/11/families_dealing_with_mental_illness_need_support_too.single.html



-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Friday 12th of December 2014 05:34:01 PM

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ed11563


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Interesting story.

I don't know of any neighbors or coworkers or friends who are battling illnesses, and might benefit from food or a card or a warm, caring phone call, etc.

Blessedly ignorant, I guess.

 



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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I think it is a good point. We often just ignore things that aren't politically correct. If you aren't suffering in the "proper" way, then people simply don't acknowledge your pain.

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Lawyerlady


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I'm feeling deja vu.

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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Why is that LL?



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I'm quite certain you posted this before on GT. I remember this discussion.

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This story, or one very similar has been posted before.

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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Lawyerlady wrote:

I'm quite certain you posted this before on GT. I remember this discussion.

 I probably did.  But, I saw it on Slate and thought it was interesting.  Is there any topic we haven't rehashed ad infinitum?  lol smile



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huskerbb


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Not remotely the same thing.

When it comes right down to it, one CHOOSES to pick up that drink, or take that pill, or smoke whatever. You don't choose to get cancer--and don't give me any bull about certain "lifestyle" choices giving someone cancer because we all know that a hundred other people can make the exact same choices and not get it.

I might feel sympathy towards the parents who have to deal with this--but it's still not the same thing. Often, people around them have enabled the addiction for years.

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karl271


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I did not know that neighbors and friends still brought hot dishes, etc. Think it is a great idea.

On the other hand, the daughter did choose that lifestyle; why bring food, etc?? Cannot quite get the guy's reasoning

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I can see it if the addiction was the result of a horrendous accident that left the person at the mercy of pain meds to stay sane for a while.

But the regular ol crack addict? Not so much.

I do feel for the family. But not enough to bring food.



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Vette


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Thank God I am not a drug addict, however when I do go off the deep end if I stop taking my meds or whatever, the last thing I would want is normal society paying me any attention. How humiliating for people to see me in that state. I would most certainly NOT want anyone to bring me food.

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I think the only addict that would want food brought would be a pot head.

Those munchies can be brutal.

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lilyofcourse wrote:

I think the only addict that would want food brought would be a pot head.

Those munchies can be brutal.

 LOL



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I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

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I think it's more about the primary caregiver's time and ability to cook. If the mom is receiving treatment for cancer, she's probably not doing much cooking or cleaning.

If a family member is critically injured or ill the hospital, the primary care giver probably isn't doing as much cooking and cleaning.

If a son, daughter or spouse is in rehab, it's not like the PCG is sitting bedside day and night. He/she has the time and ability to cook and clean. If said addict is then in a serious car accident, again, the time factor comes in because the PCG is spending time at the hospital.



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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I think the point is really to show caring. Yeah, their kid might have choosen to live in the gutter. That doesn't make it any less painful for the family.

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Blankie


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Yes, this one sounds familiar to me, too.



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Well so what? We haven't had a million threads on any other topic?

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Momala


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When my father was recovering from emergency surgery for a ruptured appendix, I remember with great appreciation the food gifts that were waiting at our door when we returned from the hospital each day, beautifully wrapped, with instructions on how to heat it, how to keep it for a day or two, how to freeze & then reheat it. (This was before micro-waves! :) )

Bringing food during a crisis is one way we show we care - it takes away the burden of fixing & cleaning up meals for those affected.

After my first husband died, I didn't have enough room in the refrigerator and freezer for all the food that was brought. The best ones were those portioned for one - no leftovers to worry about.



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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.



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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

I think the point is really to show caring. Yeah, their kid might have choosen to live in the gutter. That doesn't make it any less painful for the family.

 

flan



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Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan



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I could go for a hash brown casserole if anyone has some. Just sayin.

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flan327 wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

I think the point is really to show caring. Yeah, their kid might have choosen to live in the gutter. That doesn't make it any less painful for the family.

 

flan

 Well....go Flan go LG!



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flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

You know--I've found it to be very good.

 

People like to b!tch about this or that in their lives, how we aren't to "judge" them if we haven't walked in their shoes, blah, blah, blah....

When it comes down to CHOICES, you control that.  I CHOOSE to NOT walk in your shoes.  I've never even been tempted to try drugs--even when offered--and you're not addicted to it, yet, when you try it the first time. 

Don't want me to judge you?  Fine--but then don't b!tch when I don't bring you a casserole.

 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 12:28:10 AM

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flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

Great, actually.  Addicts not only ruin their own lives, but tend to cause a lot of pain and suffering to those that love them.  And they brought it on themselves.  While addiction as a result of a medical disaster is understandable - addiction because of recreational drugs and partying is their own damn fault. 



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And holy cow, I can't believe ANYONE thinks that's comparable to a real frickin disease people have no control over. It's attitudes like that that make people feel a lack of personal responsibility is perfectly okay. And it insults the sufferers of diseases they had no control over.

No, your addiction to drugs is not like cancer.

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Why does it have to be a contest? Oh it's not like cancer so it doesn't count?

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huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nob

think the food isn't nuchfoodaddict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food. 


Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

You know--I've found it to be very good.

 

People like to b!tch about this or that in their lives, how we aren't to "judge" them if we haven't walked in their shoes, blah, blah, blah....

When it comes down to CHOICES, you control that.  I CHOOSE to NOT walk in your shoes.  I've never even been tempted to try drugs--even when offered--and you're not addicted to it, yet, when you try it the first time. 

Don't want me to judge you?  Fine--but then don't b!tch when I don't bring you a casserole.

 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 12:28:10 AM

 I dont see where flan is " bitching"  . 



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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

Why does it have to be a contest? Oh it's not like cancer so it doesn't count?

 It's not a contest - it's not even comparable.

 

You know what the difference is between an addict and the someone who is not an addict?  The one that is not an addict said "NO" when offered drugs.  Just about every kid in this country gets offered drugs at some point or another, and thank heavens, most of them say NO because they are taught from elementary school that drugs are bad. 

It's NOT that difficult a concept.  And YES, I look down on those that purposefully ruin their lives and destroy their families by choosing drugs.  Or choose alcohol over caring for their kids.  Or steal from Grandma to feed their habit.  To be an addict - you had to become one, and that is from the choices you make. 



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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nob

think the food isn't nuchfoodaddict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food. 


Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

You know--I've found it to be very good.

 

People like to b!tch about this or that in their lives, how we aren't to "judge" them if we haven't walked in their shoes, blah, blah, blah....

When it comes down to CHOICES, you control that.  I CHOOSE to NOT walk in your shoes.  I've never even been tempted to try drugs--even when offered--and you're not addicted to it, yet, when you try it the first time. 

Don't want me to judge you?  Fine--but then don't b!tch when I don't bring you a casserole.

 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 12:28:10 AM

 I dont see where flan is " bitching"  . 

 The OP is - you know, from the article you posted.



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Is the OP flan?

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

Is the OP flan?

 Really?  Is it that hard to keep up when people are talking about the OP just because they are responding to someone?



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Flans bitching because she agrees with parts if the OP? Did flan demand someone bring her casserole somewhere?

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flan327


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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

Flans bitching because she agrees with parts if the OP? Did flan demand someone bring her casserole somewhere?

 Yes, I WANT LASAGNA!

flan



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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

Flans bitching because she agrees with parts if the OP? Did flan demand someone bring her casserole somewhere?

no



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flan327 wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

Flans bitching because she agrees with parts if the OP? Did flan demand someone bring her casserole somewhere?

 Yes, I WANT LASAGNA!

flan

 Beyotche!



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flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

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WHERE IS MY LASAGNA?????????

Someone is slacking! There WILL be repercussions...

flan

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Southern_Belle


Nothing's Impossible

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How about baked ziti instead?

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flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

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Southern_Belle wrote:

How about baked ziti instead?

 I'm a reasonable person, so YESSSSSSSSSSS!

flan



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huskerbb


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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nob

think the food isn't nuchfoodaddict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food. 


Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

You know--I've found it to be very good.

 

People like to b!tch about this or that in their lives, how we aren't to "judge" them if we haven't walked in their shoes, blah, blah, blah....

When it comes down to CHOICES, you control that.  I CHOOSE to NOT walk in your shoes.  I've never even been tempted to try drugs--even when offered--and you're not addicted to it, yet, when you try it the first time. 

Don't want me to judge you?  Fine--but then don't b!tch when I don't bring you a casserole.

 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 12:28:10 AM

 I dont see where flan is " bitching"  . 

I don't see where anyone said she was.   One should not have to put "general you" in parentheses after EVERY instance of use of the word "you" when it should be OBVIOUS (to anyone reading above a third grade level) that is what is meant. 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 01:05:13 PM

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huskerbb


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Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I think the food isn't for the addict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food.

Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

Great, actually.  Addicts not only ruin their own lives, but tend to cause a lot of pain and suffering to those that love them.  And they brought it on themselves.  While addiction as a result of a medical disaster is understandable - addiction because of recreational drugs and partying is their own damn fault. 

Absolutely.  Addicts are the most selfish people you'll ever meet--at least when they are on whatever they are addicted to. 

It's all they think about.  They steal from friends and family, they don't take care of their most basic responsibilities, they expect that others will take care of them, and, it's always someone else's fault.   



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flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

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I suspect SOME addicts know that it's THEIR fault.

flan (who is still waiting for her casserole...)

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huskerbb


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flan327 wrote:

I suspect SOME addicts know that it's THEIR fault.

flan (who is still waiting for her casserole...)

Maybe deep down--but the ones I've been around don't act like it.  They certainly aren't willing to change their behavior, or, often, even acknowledge they have a problem.  



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lilyofcourse


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Or most often they blame it on someone else.

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Lawyerlady


On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

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huskerbb wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Nob

think the food isn't nuchfoodaddict but for the family dealing with the situation. I kind of see this and kind of don't. Their daughter was in a horrible car accident and normally most people would bring the parents meals. But because it was drug related people won't bring food. 


Being an addict is a disease. A real disease. Sure you choose to drink or take drugs. But it's as much of a disease as people who have bipolar or depression. Why do people not blame people who are depressed for not taking their antidepressants? I agree people need to be responsible for their own behavior but it's just not so simply black and white all the time.

 No, it's not.  People who are bipolar or have depression have a chemical imbalance that they did nothing to cause.  An addict BECOMES one because of CHOICES they make.  It is not even remotely comparable.

 How's the air up there?

no

flan

You know--I've found it to be very good.

 

People like to b!tch about this or that in their lives, how we aren't to "judge" them if we haven't walked in their shoes, blah, blah, blah....

When it comes down to CHOICES, you control that.  I CHOOSE to NOT walk in your shoes.  I've never even been tempted to try drugs--even when offered--and you're not addicted to it, yet, when you try it the first time. 

Don't want me to judge you?  Fine--but then don't b!tch when I don't bring you a casserole.

 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 12:28:10 AM

 I dont see where flan is " bitching"  . 

I don't see where anyone said she was.   One should not have to put "general you" in parentheses after EVERY instance of use of the word "you" when it should be OBVIOUS (to anyone reading above a third grade level) that is what is meant. 



-- Edited by huskerbb on Saturday 13th of December 2014 01:05:13 PM

 And it is sad that has to be pointed out in the first place.  So, since it has to be said, it deserves to be bolded.



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Honeys_Mom


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flan327 wrote:

I suspect SOME addicts know that it's THEIR fault.

flan (who is still waiting for her casserole...)

For goodness sake people, the woman is still waiting!  Are you all trying to starve her to death?  Besides, I need to post pictures of food, don't ask me why.

Here you are, flan: biggrin

th?&id=HN.608047518440161738&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1.9&rs=0&p=0th?&id=HN.608023372130615865&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1.9&rs=0&p=0th?&id=HN.608046191295729531&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1.9&rs=0&p=0

 



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Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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I don't think you should send an addict wine HM. Just sayin.

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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Good point!

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