TOTALLY GEEKED!

Shoot - my FIL is straight and when he divorced my MIL he went out and sowed his oats and forgot about the family for a long time. My DD's were not happy that he ignored them until he found "the one" and wanted to trot them out for good looks. Kids aren't props. It sounds like the OP wants a family now - but does he only want the accessories or does he want to do the work of a family? 

Hard to know the other side of things though. Was he kept out of the kids' lives for some reason by the mother? I wonder if he paid child support?

-- Edited by Mellow Momma on Tuesday 6th of January 2015 08:38:35 AM

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Dropping out of their lives at age 11? Wow. How does someone do that? I don't get how someone can walk away from their own children. Blows my mind.

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 My husband's father did this.  He divorced my MIL when DH was 11.  He immediately married his secretary. Two years later, he walked away from not only DH and his two sisters, but his (FIL) entire extended family, from his mother to his brothers and sisters and aunts/uncles/grandparents.  One year after that, he legally adopted 3 of the 4 stepchildren.  The only reason why he didnt adopt the 4th, was that she was 18, the others were 14, 15 and 17.

He only made contact with DH's family (his sister) one time between the abandonment and death.  And that was when the new wife kicked him out of the house for 3 weeks.  As soon as he was allowed back in, the stopped all contact again.  

The new wife even went as far as not telling Granny (FIL's mother) and aunts/uncles that he had died.  She put a obit in the local paper though, totally leaving out all of his biological family.  So his family put obits in every paper where HER family were and where she was living at the time of death.  They even went as far as writing down something to the effect, "SusieQ forgot to add that Richard's mother, brothers, sisters and three biological children are also feeling the loss, since Richard never had the opportunity to explain why he emotionally, legally and financially abandoned them all when he married SusieQ, thus leaving his children to being kicked out of their home. 

Yeah...not quite the mannerly thing to write or do.  But it turns out that bit her in the ass with her extended family and even her children, who had no idea what she and FIL had done.  None of her kids talk to her anymore and have approached DH and his sisters to apologize.  

Did anyone think that perhaps he was so embarrassed or not comfortable with himself way back when that he thought best to not torment his family anymore with his obviously hidden indiscretions? And now, thinking his family may not want anything to do with him, he is starting a new chapter? He may be thrilled to hear from his daughters.