TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Guys try to use drunkeness as defense to rape

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

I think we should go back to single sex dorms.

Honeys_Mom · Mod & Permanent Board Sweetheart

They were caught on video carrying her unconscious down the hall and into a room? Guilty verdict = justice!

We should definitely go back to single sex dorms IMHO and I don't care how "old-fashioned" that sounds. At least this kind of thing wouldn't be as likely to happen in the dorms themselves.

voiceofreason · Guru

And I think we should teach our sons to not ****ing rape!!!! Yes, let blame co-ed dorms. Not men who ****ing rape. Wtf.

And for the record? Both are acceptable, Separate dorms and teaching guys not to rape. But to automatically say separate dorms as if that is the root cause? Unbelievable!

TEACH YOUR SONS NOT TO RAPE OUR DAUGHTERS!!!!!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

voiceofreason wrote:
And I think we should teach our sons to not ****ing rape!!!! Yes, let blame co-ed dorms. Not men who ****ing rape. Wtf.

And for the record? Both are acceptable, Separate dorms and teaching guys not to rape. But to automatically say separate dorms as if that is the root cause? Unbelievable!

TEACH YOUR SONS NOT TO RAPE OUR DAUGHTERS!!!!!

Where on earth do you get that? WHERE did I say same sex dorms is the root cause? I DIDN'T. But, it would lower the opportunity for rapists.

Yes, men should not rape women - that's a frickin' given. But, co-ed dorms give rapists opportunities that same sex dorms would not.

Telling men not to rape women obviously doesn't work on rapists. So what is your next brilliant plan?

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Lawyerlady wrote:
I think we should go back to single sex dorms.

It wouldn't help. The opposite sex is still allowed in the dorm. They are allowed to visit, and spend the night. They just can't live there.

Are you suggesting a dorm where no one of the opposite sex is ever allowed to enter the dorm for any reason? Those do no exist right now, that I know of. Maybe in some more conservative areas of the country, but when we visited schools for DD's we have never heard of such dorms.

TrudyML · Guru

I sorta just threw up.

Ohfour · Hooker

This has been Top Story news here since it happened.

When the guilty verdict was read, Vandenburg not only shook his head, he rolled his eyes. His mother screamed in agony. They were sure they would not be found guilty...

Oh, and the girl, she was there the whole time. She threw up when they shoed the video. They urinated on her and in her.

There are two more that will be tried later this year. They testified against Vandenburg and Batey in a plea deal...

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Ohfour wrote:
This has been Top Story news here since it happened.

When the guilty verdict was read, Vandenburg not only shook his head, he rolled his eyes. His mother screamed in agony. They were sure they would not be found guilty...

Oh, and the girl, she was there the whole time. She threw up when they shoed the video. They urinated on her and in her.

There are two more that will be tried later this year. They testified against Vandenburg and Batey in a plea deal...

I really give her a lot of credit for being there during the trial. That must have been really hard for her.

These guys are disgusting. Drunkenness is not an excuse. I don't care how drunk you get, your basic knowledge of right and wrong doesn't change THAT much.

Think about some of the men you know...how drunk would they have to be to urinate on a woman? That limit does not exist. For decent men anyway.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Mellow Momma wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
I think we should go back to single sex dorms.
It wouldn't help. The opposite sex is still allowed in the dorm. They are allowed to visit, and spend the night. They just can't live there.

Are you suggesting a dorm where no one of the opposite sex is ever allowed to enter the dorm for any reason? Those do no exist right now, that I know of. Maybe in some more conservative areas of the country, but when we visited schools for DD's we have never heard of such dorms.

When I went to college - no one of the opposite sex was allowed in the dorm rooms after 10:00 pm - they were locked, and a monitor sat at the desk in the lobby and had to buzz you into the stairwell after hours. Our dorms were actually condisered "co-ed", there was a guys' side and a girls' side and the doors between them got locked at 10:00. If you were caught you would get written up, and face school discipline. Security patroled the halls and would knock on the door if they heard opposite sex voices.

We had a large lobby, though with couches, TVs, tables, conversation pits, etc. so you could hang out down there.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Wednesday 28th of January 2015 02:03:42 PM

Ohfour · Hooker

In the state schools in TN the rules are:

(8) Overnight Guests. Overnight guests of the same sex are permitted if the following conditions are met:
(a) The guest is registered with the Residence Hall Director prior to staying overnight.
(b) The resident host informs the guest of residence hall regulations and accepts responsibility for the guest’s conduct.
(c) Permission for a guest to stay more than two (2) consecutive nights must be obtained from the Director of Housing and Residential Life.

NAOW · Vette's SS

Lawyerlady wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
I think we should go back to single sex dorms.
It wouldn't help. The opposite sex is still allowed in the dorm. They are allowed to visit, and spend the night. They just can't live there.

Are you suggesting a dorm where no one of the opposite sex is ever allowed to enter the dorm for any reason? Those do no exist right now, that I know of. Maybe in some more conservative areas of the country, but when we visited schools for DD's we have never heard of such dorms.
When I went to college - no one of the opposite sex was allowed in the dorm rooms after 10:00 pm - they were locked, and a monitor sat at the desk in the lobby and had to buzz you into the stairwell after hours. Our dorms were actually condisered "co-ed", there was a guys' side and a girls' side and the doors between them got locked at 10:00. If you were caught you would get written up, and face school discipline. Security patroled the halls and would knock on the door if they heard opposite sex voices.
We had a large lobby, though with couches, TVs, tables, conversation pits, etc. so you could hang out down there.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Wednesday 28th of January 2015 02:03:42 PM

My dorm in college was the same way. It was the only all girls dorm on campus though. If you had your boyfriend come over earlier in the day he could stay the night-because they didn't go door to door and check, but if he didn't leave by 10, he would have to stay the night and leave the next morning or you would risk getting in trouble for having him there after 10pm. If there were a ton of guys it would have been pretty noticeable though.

Ilumine · Regular

These two were in their "right" mind.

But I have to wonder about some of the other date rapes. If both the boy and girl are drinking and drunk, then why is only the female allowed to use her incapacitate state as an out for saying yes (i.e. I was too drunk to make a congnizant decision to say yes or no) but the male is held to a higher standard?

I mean, don't get me wrong, the catch 22 for drunk driving is a good standard, but...

NAOW · Vette's SS

Ilumine wrote:
These two were in their "right" mind.

But I have to wonder about some of the other date rapes. If both the boy and girl are drinking and drunk, then why is only the female allowed to use her incapacitate state as an out for saying yes (i.e. I was too drunk to make a congnizant decision to say yes or no) but the male is held to a higher standard?

I mean, don't get me wrong, the catch 22 for drunk driving is a good standard, but...

I think if she is passed out-that's an automatic no. No matter how drunk the boy is.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Sounds like they were overconfident they would be found not guilty. It is a shame to see so many young lives ruined but they should never have done what they did, drunk or not.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Ilumine wrote:
These two were in their "right" mind.

But I have to wonder about some of the other date rapes. If both the boy and girl are drinking and drunk, then why is only the female allowed to use her incapacitate state as an out for saying yes (i.e. I was too drunk to make a congnizant decision to say yes or no) but the male is held to a higher standard?

I mean, don't get me wrong, the catch 22 for drunk driving is a good standard, but...

I think if a girl says "yes" - it's a yes even if she is drunk. And yes can be inferred by action - like passionately kissing and helping the guy undress. But, a girl that is passed out cannot give consent.

Ohfour · Hooker

Lexxy wrote:
Sounds like they were overconfident they would be found not guilty. It is a shame to see so many young lives ruined but they should never have done what they did, drunk or not.

Vandenburg didn't actually touch her. He "just" (sarcasm) encouraged and directed his friends to do what they did to her. He recorded it and sent it out to players on the football team. He really thought that since he didn't penetrate her, he would be found not guilty...

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Sounds like they were overconfident they would be found not guilty. It is a shame to see so many young lives ruined but they should never have done what they did, drunk or not.

Vandenburg didn't actually touch her. He "just" (sarcasm) encouraged and directed his friends to do what they did to her. He recorded it and sent it out to players on the football team. He really thought that since he didn't penetrate her, he would be found not guilty...

I think since he directed it he was guilty & it sounds like the jury did too. I think he is even worse than the others because the article said he'd been seeing her. He should have been protecting her not orchestrating her rape.

Ohfour · Hooker

Lexxy wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Sounds like they were overconfident they would be found not guilty. It is a shame to see so many young lives ruined but they should never have done what they did, drunk or not.

Vandenburg didn't actually touch her. He "just" (sarcasm) encouraged and directed his friends to do what they did to her. He recorded it and sent it out to players on the football team. He really thought that since he didn't penetrate her, he would be found not guilty...

I think since he directed it he was guilty & it sounds like the jury did too. I think he is even worse than the others because the article said he'd been seeing her. He should have been protecting her not orchestrating her rape.

Agree 100% Lexxy. In his mind though, there was no way he was going to found guilty. His attorney either didn't level with him or he just refused to listen. I think it's probably the latter. Throughout this, he has seemed very c0cky.

-- Edited by Ohfour on Wednesday 28th of January 2015 02:44:50 PM

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Sounds like they were overconfident they would be found not guilty. It is a shame to see so many young lives ruined but they should never have done what they did, drunk or not.

Vandenburg didn't actually touch her. He "just" (sarcasm) encouraged and directed his friends to do what they did to her. He recorded it and sent it out to players on the football team. He really thought that since he didn't penetrate her, he would be found not guilty...

I think since he directed it he was guilty & it sounds like the jury did too. I think he is even worse than the others because the article said he'd been seeing her. He should have been protecting her not orchestrating her rape.
Agree 100% Lexxy. In his mind though, there was no way he was going to found guilty. His attorney either didn't level with him or he just refused to listen. I think it's probably the latter. Throughout this, he has seemed very c0cky.

-- Edited by Ohfour on Wednesday 28th of January 2015 02:44:50 PM

He looks like a ****y jerk from his picture. He's probably an entitled rich kid who thinks he's above the rules. Bet he has fun in jail.

Ohfour · Hooker

Yeah...here's his mug shot...

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Ohfour wrote:
In the state schools in TN the rules are:

(8) Overnight Guests. Overnight guests of the same sex are permitted if the following conditions are met:
(a) The guest is registered with the Residence Hall Director prior to staying overnight.
(b) The resident host informs the guest of residence hall regulations and accepts responsibility for the guest’s conduct.
(c) Permission for a guest to stay more than two (2) consecutive nights must be obtained from the Director of Housing and Residential Life.

This was the case at all the schools we visited as well. I have yet to see a school with a monitor at a desk. I did see some of that in the 90's, but it was few and far between then. Notice that the guest doesn't have to be a student and no age limit is enforced.

These days, even if a dorm is single sex, members of the opposite sex are permitted in. Heck, they don't even have to be students at the school. Any person is allowed in as long as they are accompanied by a student. So if your cousin Fred is a convicted rapist from out of town, as long as you let him in, you are playing by the rules

It isnt a cure, and I am not sure it would solve anything. But as a mother, I think single sex dorms would be a great start.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Ohfour wrote:

Yeah...here's his mug shot...

He is frickin smiling. Urgh!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:

Yeah...here's his mug shot...
He is frickin smiling. Urgh!

Yep. What a little ****.

Ohfour · Hooker

When the verdict was read, he was actually mad, not worried or remorseful. Wait until he goes to prison. They are gonna loooooove him...

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Ohfour wrote:
When the verdict was read, he was actually mad, not worried or remorseful. Wait until he goes to prison. They are gonna loooooove him...

I hope the details of what he did become known in prison. Very well known.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
When the verdict was read, he was actually mad, not worried or remorseful. Wait until he goes to prison. They are gonna loooooove him...
I hope the details of what he did become known in prison. Very well known.

He won't be smiling long.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Lexxy wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
When the verdict was read, he was actually mad, not worried or remorseful. Wait until he goes to prison. They are gonna loooooove him...
I hope the details of what he did become known in prison. Very well known.
He won't be smiling long.

He is good looking too...the boys in lockup will have fun with him.

TrudyML · Guru

My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

TrudyML wrote:
My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.

Your nephew is a real man. Good for him!

Ohfour · Hooker

Mellow Momma wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
When the verdict was read, he was actually mad, not worried or remorseful. Wait until he goes to prison. They are gonna loooooove him...
I hope the details of what he did become known in prison. Very well known.
He won't be smiling long.
He is good looking too...the boys in lockup will have fun with him.

He sure does have some pretty lips. Nice and plump...

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

TrudyML wrote:
My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.

I love those guys! I knew a few. I remember (very vaguely) being carried back to my friend's apartment on one occasion and deposited safely in her room. I didn't get that drunk again. Without chivalry - that evening could have ended badly.

Ohfour · Hooker

Mellow Momma wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.
Your nephew is a real man. Good for him!

Amen...

voiceofreason · Guru

Ok. Please let's agree that rape is wrong. Implying he will be raped in prison and he will deserve that, is wrong. Rape is wrong. RAPE IS WRONG.

I understand wanting revenge but I can't even fathom being ok with anyone being raped. Not even a rapist. And the logic of that is suspect as well. If you want him to be revenge raped, one night, 4 guys. This guy will be raped repeatedly for years and that isn't an eye for an eye.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

DD had an old high school boyfriend visit her at college. They were outside a frat house where she went to a lot of parties and knew a lot of guys. DD and exBF started to argue, and the ex slapped DD across the face. She said as soon as she felt the slap, she heard someone say "oh hell NO! Not in our house!" and a bunch of frat guys jumped off the porch and picked up the ex and carried him off. DD never saw him again or heard from him after that. The frat boys said "don't worry about it. We taught him what happens to boys who slap women".

Frat boys can be good guys. I don't like when they all get a bad rap because of a few douche rockets like the guy in the OP.

TrudyML · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.
Your nephew is a real man. Good for him!

He is awesome. He never mentioned it. His sister told me. He doesn't like idiots.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Thank you ladies for sharing good guy stories. It makes the world a better place.

TrudyML · Guru

I lived by the Frat he was a part of. No one could believe I was his auntie. They all watched out for me, daily. I would give them home baked treats. My nephew would just beam with pride. I miss them all.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

voiceofreason wrote:
Ok. Please let's agree that rape is wrong. Implying he will be raped in prison and he will deserve that, is wrong. Rape is wrong. RAPE IS WRONG.

I understand wanting revenge but I can't even fathom being ok with anyone being raped. Not even a rapist. And the logic of that is suspect as well. If you want him to be revenge raped, one night, 4 guys. This guy will be raped repeatedly for years and that isn't an eye for an eye.

I agree.

TrudyML · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
My nephew (Huge football player, sweetheart) saw a girl drugged at a frat party. He scooped the girl up located her friends and brought her to her dorm room. He wasn't letting that happen to a girl.
I love those guys! I knew a few. I remember (very vaguely) being carried back to my friend's apartment on one occasion and deposited safely in her room. I didn't get that drunk again. Without chivalry - that evening could have ended badly.

There needs to be good guys everywhere!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

I really think there are more good guys than bad guys. It's just the bad ones get the press.

TrudyML · Guru

I agree. I was getting stalked and my male coworkers were out drinking. Tough, athletic guys. The loser stalker started with one. Yeah, that ended in a beat down. The one the stalker mouthed off to? Yikes, tough guy. One of my friends called to tell me. Gee? The stalker went away.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Lawyerlady wrote:
I really think there are more good guys than bad guys. It's just the bad ones get the press.

I agree.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Anyone that exhibits this type of behavior when drunk, has it "in" them. Using being drunk as an excuse as an abuser is a non starter (with me). There are so many college students that party, as you all have pointed out, that when they see something wrong going on they jump in and stop it.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Another one -
________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A former Stanford University swimmer will face several felony charges after prosecutors say he raped a woman as she lay unconscious on campus grounds.

Brock Allen Turner, 19, is expected to be formally charged Wednesday with five felony counts, including rape of an unconscious woman, rape of an intoxicated woman and two counts of sexual assault with a foreign object, the Santa Clara County district attorney's office told The Times.

Turner voluntarily withdrew from the university Tuesday, Stanford spokeswoman Lisa Lapin said. He's not allowed to re-register for classes and is barred from setting foot on campus, Lapin said.

Early on the morning on Jan. 18, prosecutors say, two men riding bikes on campus spotted a man later identified as Turner on top of an unconscious woman. Turner ran away, but the pair tackled him. A third person called police.

Turner was arrested, booked into the Santa Clara County Jail and released after posting $150,000 bail, prosecutors said. He's scheduled to be arraigned Feb. 2.

The investigation into the incident was conducted by the Stanford University Department of Public Safety, which turned over its findings to prosecutors.

An Ohio native, Turner was a freshman at Stanford. He swam freestyle and backstroke for the Cardinal, according to the university's online athletic roster. His profile has since been taken down.

The alleged victim was not enrolled at Stanford and was visiting the campus for a party, prosecutors said.

Turner was not a member of a fraternity, said Lapin, explaining that freshmen cannot join fraternities or sororities until the spring.

Turner could not be reached for comment.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

At least this one had good guys, too.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

I don't understand the mentality. Hey there is a drunk passed out (possibly dead?) chick laying on the ground. I feel the need to rape her. Insane.

And yes at least this one had some good guys. Outnumbering the bad guy even.

burns07 · Guru

the prosecutor was exactly right--this wasn't about the binge-drinking / promiscuous sex atmosphere of universities at all--it was about a bunch of entitled punks thinking they could do whatever they wanted and get away with it

as a frat guy myself, can state for a fact that despite many, many drunken / nutso / obnoxious parties / nights was never, ever involved in ( or witnessed ) the rape of any women ( not one ) either sober / loaded / stoned / passed-out, whatever--and that was over the course of several years at two major state universities ( in TX and CA )--drunk or no, those boys knew what they were doing and that it was wrong--they need to go inside for a long time

kudos to the woman for making them pay--right on, young lady

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Lawyerlady wrote:
Another one -
________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A former Stanford University swimmer will face several felony charges after prosecutors say he raped a woman as she lay unconscious on campus grounds.

Brock Allen Turner, 19, is expected to be formally charged Wednesday with five felony counts, including rape of an unconscious woman, rape of an intoxicated woman and two counts of sexual assault with a foreign object, the Santa Clara County district attorney's office told The Times.

Turner voluntarily withdrew from the university Tuesday, Stanford spokeswoman Lisa Lapin said. He's not allowed to re-register for classes and is barred from setting foot on campus, Lapin said.

Early on the morning on Jan. 18, prosecutors say, two men riding bikes on campus spotted a man later identified as Turner on top of an unconscious woman. Turner ran away, but the pair tackled him. A third person called police.

Turner was arrested, booked into the Santa Clara County Jail and released after posting $150,000 bail, prosecutors said. He's scheduled to be arraigned Feb. 2.

The investigation into the incident was conducted by the Stanford University Department of Public Safety, which turned over its findings to prosecutors.

An Ohio native, Turner was a freshman at Stanford. He swam freestyle and backstroke for the Cardinal, according to the university's online athletic roster. His profile has since been taken down.

The alleged victim was not enrolled at Stanford and was visiting the campus for a party, prosecutors said.

Turner was not a member of a fraternity, said Lapin, explaining that freshmen cannot join fraternities or sororities until the spring.

Turner could not be reached for comment.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

At least this one had good guys, too.

Oh my God. I saw his pic on another site. I think I met him before. I have to check with DD when she gets home. I can't remember the name of the guy we met, but he looks just like the pic. Damn.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

burns07 wrote:

the prosecutor was exactly right--this wasn't about the binge-drinking / promiscuous sex atmosphere of universities at all--it was about a bunch of entitled punks thinking they could do whatever they wanted and get away with it

as a frat guy myself, can state for a fact that despite many, many drunken / nutso / obnoxious parties / nights was never, ever involved in ( or witnessed ) the rape of any women ( not one ) either sober / loaded / stoned / passed-out, whatever--and that was over the course of several years at two major state universities ( in TX and CA )--drunk or no, those boys knew what they were doing and that it was wrong--they need to go inside for a long time

kudos to the woman for making them pay--right on, young lady

My son was a Frat guy. And he supports your experience Burns/ He would be the first guy to protect anyone.

Honeys_Mom · Mod & Permanent Board Sweetheart