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Post Info TOPIC: How to Override the Assumptions Others Make About You
Lady Gaga Snerd


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How to Override the Assumptions Others Make About You
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How to Override the Assumptions Others Make About You

People make automatic judgements about you. Here's what to do about it.
Post published by Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D. on Mar 24, 2015 in The Science of Success
 
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Have you ever felt like the people you work with don’t really get you? Of course you have, because they probably don’t. But the really vital question is, why? Why is it so hard to get other people to understand who were are and where we’re coming from?

The answer lies, in large part, in a simple fact: The human brain is unwilling to expend much of its energy and processing capacity unless it really has to.

To keep from having to work too hard, the brain relies on simple, efficient thought processes to get the job done, not so much out of laziness—though there is some of that, too—but more out of necessity. There is just too much going on, too much to notice, understand, and act on for the brain to give every individual and every occurrence its undivided, unbiased attention.

 

So when it comes to perceiving you, your colleagues are (without realizing it) relying heavily on assumptions, the miserly brain’s favorite shortcut. They guide what the perceiver sees, how that information is interpreted, and how it is remembered, forming an integral part of his or her perception of you.

Assumptions come in many varieties, but two of the most powerful and pervasive of these are confirmation bias and the primacy effect.

CONFIRMATION BIAS

When other people look at you, they see what they expect to see. If they have reason to believe that you are smart, they will see evidence of intelligence in your behavior whether or not there is any. If they have reason to believe you are dishonest, they will interpret a lack of eye contact or awkward body language as evidence that you have something to hide as opposed to evidence that you are shy, or distracted, or in gastric distress.

In a nutshell, people will interpret your current behavior in a way that makes it consistent with your past behavior, and they will tend to play down or completely ignore evidence that contradicts their existing opinion of you. What’s more, they will have no idea that they’re doing it.

Confirmation bias is shaped by many factors. Stereotypes about the groups to which you belong, your apparent similarity to other people the perceiver knows, and culture—yours and theirs—are among the most consequential. And of course, their own past experience with you, if they have any, plays a major role.

That last part seems fairly logical as far as assumptions go. If you have been gregarious, pessimistic, or hot-headed in the past, it’s reasonable to think you are likely to continue to be so in the future and to interpret your behavior accordingly. If you say something that could be considered offensive or humorous, and I know you to be a jokester, then I’m more likely to go with the latter interpretation and to see the humor in your off-color remark. My past experience with you helps me to make the right call.

The problem, however, is that our early impressions of a person can hold far too much weight and lead us astray when they paint an inaccurate picture.

THE PRIMACY EFFECT

First impressions matter most. In other words, information we get about a person early in our observation of them influences how we interpret and remember everything that comes after.

Imagine two children, each taking a 30-question math test. On the first half, Timmy gets 14 out of 15 correct, while John gets only six. In the second half, the scores reverse with John getting 14 and Timmy only six. Objectively, these two children have both performed at exactly the same level by getting a total of 20 out of 30 problems correct. So rationally, anyone watching would conclude that they have the same level of mastery in math, right?

Only that’s not what happens—not even close. In study after study, researchers find that Timmy is perceived, even by experts like math teachers, to be the more talented of the two. This is because performance on the first half of the test exerts a far greater influence on judgment than performance on the second. In essence, when the test is only halfway finished, the perceiver has already concluded that Timmy is smart and John is not. What happens afterward does precious little to alter those initial impressions.

The implications of findings like these for late bloomers—or anyone who struggles initially only to excel later—are terrifying. It’s not impossible to change these initial impressions, but it’s really tough. John would have to present overwhelming evidence of his math ability in order to override it, while Timmy can happily coast on his early success for quite a while. The problem for John is that he may not even be given the chance to override that impression if he is placed in a remedial math track or discouraged from pursuing math altogether.

Incidentally, the primacy effect is also the reason why your parents still treat you like you’re 12 even when you are 40. In their eyes, you are still the person they first knew you to be: naive, inexperienced, and more than a little foolish. My mother still insists that I am disorganized and scatterbrained, despite the fact that I literally make my living writing and speaking about planning and time management. She constantly tells me that I should "learn to write things down." Sigh.

So now that you know about the confirmation bias and primacy effect, what should you do?

TRY REALLY HARD TO MAKE AN ACCURATE FIRST IMPRESSION.

Often, this means making your thoughts and intentions more clear. Don’t leave people to make guesses about what you are like or what you want, because they may guess wrong, and then you’ll have a very steep hill to climb to undo the damage that’s been done.

RECOGNIZE THAT CONFIRMATION BIAS IS A FORMIDABLE FOE.

To get someone else to not simply see what they expect to see, you’re going to need to go out of way to do something attention-getting. If your boss thinks you are a procrastinator, turning a few things in on time won’t help you. Turn in everything early for about a month or two, at least, and you’ll be on the right track. Evidence has to be hard to ignore to get past the confirmation bias, so think big.

Want to learn more about how to come across the way you intend to, and have people really "get" you?  Check out my new book No One Understands You, and What To Do About It (link is external).



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Good article on confirmation bias. It is like "if someone dislikes you, the way you hold your fork annoys them". But, if they like you, you can spill a plate of food on them and they will think it is fine.

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Blankie


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Good example of why first impressions are really important.

I think most people at work will draw quick conclusions because they don't have time to do otherwise. Work is busy.

You also can't control what other people choose to think about you. Some people with a positive outlook are going to look for the good in people. And some negative nellies will always pick out the bad.

It's good to put your best foot forward and act professionally, but beyond that I have to let go of how people perceive me. That's on them, not on me.



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I think that happens a lot on this board. Take flan and I for example. She thinks I was mean to husker (lol) and ed so she doesn't like me. She's called me a troll (because I believe in God) and a stalker (because I enjoy arguing with husker) and I am neither of those things. Yet any time I disagree with her she get's mad at me then someone else will come in and say the exact same thing but because she likes them there's not even a frown.



-- Edited by Tinydancer on Tuesday 24th of March 2015 01:30:40 PM

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flan327


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Why did I know what was going to be said??????

flan

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Tinydancer wrote:

I think that happens a lot on this board. Take flan and I for example. She thinks I was mean to husker (lol) and ed so she doesn't like me. She's called me a troll (because I believe in God) and a stalker (because I enjoy arguing with husker) and I am neither of those things. Yet any time I disagree with her she get's mad at me then someone else will come in and say the exact same thing but because she likes them there's not even a frown.



-- Edited by Tinydancer on Tuesday 24th of March 2015 01:30:40 PM

 What are you smoking? That's BS...playing the victim card again?

flan



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Tinydancer wrote:

I think that happens a lot on this board. Take flan and I for example. She thinks I was mean to husker (lol) and ed so she doesn't like me. She's called me a troll (because I believe in God) and a stalker (because I enjoy arguing with husker) and I am neither of those things. Yet any time I disagree with her she get's mad at me then someone else will come in and say the exact same thing but because she likes them there's not even a frown.



-- Edited by Tinydancer on Tuesday 24th of March 2015 01:30:40 PM

Eh, she's mad because we are Tom Brady fans! 



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Victim card again? Sorry you're always so busy using it I can never have a turn.

You calling it BS. You've called me both those things but nice try. Unless you want to add liar to the things you've called me.

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TrudyML wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:

I think that happens a lot on this board. Take flan and I for example. She thinks I was mean to husker (lol) and ed so she doesn't like me. She's called me a troll (because I believe in God) and a stalker (because I enjoy arguing with husker) and I am neither of those things. Yet any time I disagree with her she get's mad at me then someone else will come in and say the exact same thing but because she likes them there's not even a frown.



-- Edited by Tinydancer on Tuesday 24th of March 2015 01:30:40 PM

Eh, she's mad because we are Tom Brady fans! 

 Haha...Yes!!!!!



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flan327


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I inferred that, imo, you were acting like a troll BUT IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR BELIEF IN GOD.

flan

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Tinydancer wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:

I think that happens a lot on this board. Take flan and I for example. She thinks I was mean to husker (lol) and ed so she doesn't like me. She's called me a troll (because I believe in God) and a stalker (because I enjoy arguing with husker) and I am neither of those things. Yet any time I disagree with her she get's mad at me then someone else will come in and say the exact same thing but because she likes them there's not even a frown.



-- Edited by Tinydancer on Tuesday 24th of March 2015 01:30:40 PM

Eh, she's mad because we are Tom Brady fans! 

 Haha...Yes!!!!!

 hehe



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Tinydancer


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Well imo you think you can call names and run. That is the definition of a troll. Also you keep saying husker is your friend yet he shows you nothing but scorn so at least we have that in common.

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Lexxy


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Well isn't this fun.

We have a long time client at work. My coworker can not stand him & thinks his creep factor is off the charts. She can't even stand talking to him on the phone. I think he is a little odd but basically a nice guy & harmless. Just our perception.

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My creep factor is off the charts for Lexxy!












hehehe

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Lexxy


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TrudyML wrote:

My creep factor is off the charts for Lexxy!












hehehe

 That is because I've been stalking you for years!



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Because you love me!

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Ohfour


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I honestly do not care what other people think about me. I'm a pretty outgoing and likeable person. You don't like me? I.DON'T.CARE.

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Lexxy wrote:

Well isn't this fun.

We have a long time client at work. My coworker can not stand him & thinks his creep factor is off the charts. She can't even stand talking to him on the phone. I think he is a little odd but basically a nice guy & harmless. Just our perception.

 Is her "perv alarm" usually on target ? I have a big time "prev alarm" and it's never been wrong. Ever.  

I really think we have lost the ability to listen to our inner voices when it comes to things like this. We need to trust our gut instinct. 

 



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Ohfour wrote:

I honestly do not care what other people think about me. I'm a pretty outgoing and likeable person. You don't like me? I.DON'T.CARE.

 This is how I feel too. And honestly, most people tell me that's their favorite thing about me. I say what I think, and I don't care what others think about me. 



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TrudyML


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Mellow Momma wrote:
Lexxy wrote:

Well isn't this fun.

We have a long time client at work. My coworker can not stand him & thinks his creep factor is off the charts. She can't even stand talking to him on the phone. I think he is a little odd but basically a nice guy & harmless. Just our perception.

 Is her "perv alarm" usually on target ? I have a big time "prev alarm" and it's never been wrong. Ever.  

I really think we have lost the ability to listen to our inner voices when it comes to things like this. We need to trust our gut instinct. 

 

Mine is always dead on.   



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Blankie


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Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:

I honestly do not care what other people think about me. I'm a pretty outgoing and likeable person. You don't like me? I.DON'T.CARE.

 This is how I feel too. And honestly, most people tell me that's their favorite thing about me. I say what I think, and I don't care what others think about me. 

 It's a waste of time worrying what others think. Like for example, if I use the restroom stall to pee quickly after a real stinker was in there, then somebody comes and uses it just after me, the next person is of course going to think it was me that stunk it up. When it wasn't.

That's just one silly example. But we all have inaccurate perceptions all day long. Ya gotta let it go.



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Mellow Momma


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Mine too Trudy. I have learned to listen. No matter what.


A close friend of my FIL always set off my creeper alarm. Always. I didn't trust him around my kids at all. Not sure why at the time. Later, at a wedding, his step daughter got sloppy drunk and told me he molested her for years and not to let him around my girls. Apparently my FIL knew about the "allegations" but thought they were not true since the step daughter never went to the police.

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Lexxy


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TrudyML wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lexxy wrote:

Well isn't this fun.

We have a long time client at work. My coworker can not stand him & thinks his creep factor is off the charts. She can't even stand talking to him on the phone. I think he is a little odd but basically a nice guy & harmless. Just our perception.

 Is her "perv alarm" usually on target ? I have a big time "prev alarm" and it's never been wrong. Ever.  

I really think we have lost the ability to listen to our inner voices when it comes to things like this. We need to trust our gut instinct. 

 

Mine is always dead on.   

 I don't know about her "perv alarm" but I will say she is much more judgemental than I am & I am much more trusting than maybe I should be.



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TrudyML


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Mellow Momma wrote:

Mine too Trudy. I have learned to listen. No matter what.


A close friend of my FIL always set off my creeper alarm. Always. I didn't trust him around my kids at all. Not sure why at the time. Later, at a wedding, his step daughter got sloppy drunk and told me he molested her for years and not to let him around my girls. Apparently my FIL knew about the "allegations" but thought they were not true since the step daughter never went to the police.

See?  It works!  That bus driver who started stalking me?  I knew he was a creep months in advance. 



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I think it is hard to make correct assumptions of someone on a message board. You can't hear the tone nor can you see the posters facial assumptions.

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Blankie wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Ohfour wrote:

I honestly do not care what other people think about me. I'm a pretty outgoing and likeable person. You don't like me? I.DON'T.CARE.

 This is how I feel too. And honestly, most people tell me that's their favorite thing about me. I say what I think, and I don't care what others think about me. 

 It's a waste of time worrying what others think. Like for example, if I use the restroom stall to pee quickly after a real stinker was in there, then somebody comes and uses it just after me, the next person is of course going to think it was me that stunk it up. When it wasn't.

That's just one silly example. But we all have inaccurate perceptions all day long. Ya gotta let it go.

Well, there are some people who have already made up their minds about you so , so be it.  I don't bother trying to change anyone's mind.   Just move on to other people.  



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I keep trying to get over the assumptions that I'm a sexy love goddess :)

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Lindley wrote:

I think it is hard to make correct assumptions of someone on a message board. You can't hear the tone nor can you see the posters facial assumptions.

??? You can't ??? Didn't YOU get that feature ???  You have to sign up then click on the "display" button. wink



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ed11563 wrote:
Lindley wrote:

I think it is hard to make correct assumptions of someone on a message board. You can't hear the tone nor can you see the posters facial assumptions.

??? You can't ??? Didn't YOU get that feature ???  You have to sign up then click on the "display" button. wink

Seriously though, I think most of us get to understand the other posters' attitudes and outlook. I think most of us can figure out who to trust, and who to handle with a grain of salt. 



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ed11563


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Mary Zombie wrote:

I keep trying to get over the assumptions that I'm a sexy love goddess :)

Mary, it's clearly true, so why do you question it? smile



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I'm not gonna lie, there's some people who I care what they think of me. Not here though.

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ed11563 wrote:
Mary Zombie wrote:

I keep trying to get over the assumptions that I'm a sexy love goddess :)

Mary, it's clearly true, so why do you question it? smile

 Muahhhh!



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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I'm not gonna lie, there's some people who I care what they think of me. Not here though.

What????   furious 



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Of course we all want everyone to like us and think highly of us. And, we have all worked all of our lives hoping our parents, grandparents, friends, kids, etc would be proud of us. But, you can only be who you are. Some people are going to dislike you for whatever reason. I went through a very rough patch in life with Lyme's disease, chronic fatigue, almost dying of DIC after during DD's birth and being hospitalized and my dad's suicide. So, people that got to know me during that period will probably always think of me in that light. I was exhausted and barely holding it together. Oh well, I probably didn't make the best "first impressions" during that time because I was so preoccupied with trying to get through the day. But, now I am stronger and have moved beyond that. Those who want to continue the journey of life with me may do so and those who don't, ok. My feeling is that there are hundreds of people all around me every day that I don't yet know and life is a garden so find some variety and have fun.


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flan327


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ed11563 wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
Lindley wrote:

I think it is hard to make correct assumptions of someone on a message board. You can't hear the tone nor can you see the posters facial assumptions.

??? You can't ??? Didn't YOU get that feature ???  You have to sign up then click on the "display" button. wink

Seriously though, I think most of us get to understand the other posters' attitudes and outlook. I think most of us can figure out who to trust, and who to handle with a grain of salt. 

Especially after years of interactions.

flan 



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more than anything, believe it's situational--have trained myself not to rely SOLELY on my first impressions, but to log them and observe--actions speak louder than words--body language, eye contact, voice inflections / stress, reflex reactions all play into " reading " a person--and there are some that make every effort to disguise who they are but they cannot--they are the easiest to read of all


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There are so many assumptions made about me and I have been called and labeled everything there is.  I have come to realize that these are all small things, and I don’t sweat the small things.  If I let everything someone says or thinks about me affect me, it would interfere in the way I go about my life.  I live my life for me, not for other people.  As many are aware, I have no family, offspring and very few friends.  If I did have family members I were caring for, then I would live my life both for myself and family members. 


People can think whatever they like about me.  They can judge on sight and first impressions.  That is their choice.  My choice is to not be petty and stoop to someone’s level, or let what they say about me affect me, especially if they have not met me in person.  Over the years, I have mastered the art of letting things go.  This was not an overnight thing.  It took reading certain books, actually doing exercises and activity to apply what I learned, and practice, practice, practice.  Yes, that meant opening myself up to people’s judgment and letting them spew their hatred and misunderstanding at me, not bite their heads off, walk the higher road, and then letting it go. 

 

I was recently the target of “bullies” on a forum.  What pissed many people off was the way I construct my posts.  English is not my first language, and sometimes I may not compose my words like other “English” speakers do.  I was also not educated or raised here, so I believe the way I put my thoughts into words is what got people so worked up – the topic was McDonald’s and their “Love” campaign, in which people would do things and get a free meal – I posted that if they asked me to call my parent and tell them I love them, I would have to decline, because I do not have parents – and the melee ensued with THAT statement, which someone else also made following me and was puzzled as to why they were not called out. (I have provided this just for background, not to slander anyone.  The contributing factor is provided to help readers understand this post, nothing more).

 

Also, the fact that I do not require or ask for anyone’s help with resolving my life issues or events was another point that really pissed off those board members as well.  Because they are there to advise each other and offer support only.  I posted an supportive advice article (as people do on this board), and I can most certainly say that it triggered an epic thread in which many board members and several mods bashed me, called me out, cut me down, called me a troll, made nasty and inappropriate assumptions about me and who I was, diagnosed me with serious mental disorders, basically the usual stuff that happens on message boards when people attack each other.  It was interesting but not surprising at how many people, even those who really enjoyed my posts before, decided to jump in on the fun and get their digs in.

 

They never got a response from me.  Why?  Because I had already let it go.  What they said about me was not true, and knowing myself, that was good enough for me.  Oh sure, I could have jumped in there and defended myself, but why do what others wanted me to do?  Why contribute to the nastiness and rudeness just over the fact that 1) I do not require advice on how to live my life, 2) the wording of my posts is not what everyone knows as “standard English”, and 3) I posted a supportive advice article like other people do.  I had also been on the board for a few years and have many posts, so people were familiar with the way I post.

 

I have not been called out since.  I did not acknowledge anything they said about me.  I let them make assumptions.  And I let it go.  They can make all the assumptions they want, but I will not engage because things like that are not worth getting upset about.  I fortunately have a very high level of emotional resilience and intelligence.  It works for me.  Let people assume.  I will not stoop to their level and engage them.  And I will let it go.  smile  



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Renegade Time Lord wrote:

 

 

There are so many assumptions made about me and I have been called and labeled everything there is.  I have come to realize that these are all small things, and I don’t sweat the small things.  If I let everything someone says or thinks about me affect me, it would interfere in the way I go about my life.  I live my life for me, not for other people.  As many are aware, I have no family, offspring and very few friends.  If I did have family members I were caring for, then I would live my life both for myself and family members. 


People can think whatever they like about me.  They can judge on sight and first impressions.  That is their choice.  My choice is to not be petty and stoop to someone’s level, or let what they say about me affect me, especially if they have not met me in person.  Over the years, I have mastered the art of letting things go.  This was not an overnight thing.  It took reading certain books, actually doing exercises and activity to apply what I learned, and practice, practice, practice.  Yes, that meant opening myself up to people’s judgment and letting them spew their hatred and misunderstanding at me, not bite their heads off, walk the higher road, and then letting it go. 

 

I was recently the target of “bullies” on a forum.  What pissed many people off was the way I construct my posts.  English is not my first language, and sometimes I may not compose my words like other “English” speakers do.  I was also not educated or raised here, so I believe the way I put my thoughts into words is what got people so worked up – the topic was McDonald’s and their “Love” campaign, in which people would do things and get a free meal – I posted that if they asked me to call my parent and tell them I love them, I would have to decline, because I do not have parents – and the melee ensued with THAT statement, which someone else also made following me and was puzzled as to why they were not called out. (I have provided this just for background, not to slander anyone.  The contributing factor is provided to help readers understand this post, nothing more).

 

Also, the fact that I do not require or ask for anyone’s help with resolving my life issues or events was another point that really pissed off those board members as well.  Because they are there to advise each other and offer support only.  I posted an supportive advice article (as people do on this board), and I can most certainly say that it triggered an epic thread in which many board members and several mods bashed me, called me out, cut me down, called me a troll, made nasty and inappropriate assumptions about me and who I was, diagnosed me with serious mental disorders, basically the usual stuff that happens on message boards when people attack each other.  It was interesting but not surprising at how many people, even those who really enjoyed my posts before, decided to jump in on the fun and get their digs in.

 

They never got a response from me.  Why?  Because I had already let it go.  What they said about me was not true, and knowing myself, that was good enough for me.  Oh sure, I could have jumped in there and defended myself, but why do what others wanted me to do?  Why contribute to the nastiness and rudeness just over the fact that 1) I do not require advice on how to live my life, 2) the wording of my posts is not what everyone knows as “standard English”, and 3) I posted a supportive advice article like other people do.  I had also been on the board for a few years and have many posts, so people were familiar with the way I post.

 

I have not been called out since.  I did not acknowledge anything they said about me.  I let them make assumptions.  And I let it go.  They can make all the assumptions they want, but I will not engage because things like that are not worth getting upset about.  I fortunately have a very high level of emotional resilience and intelligence.  It works for me.  Let people assume.  I will not stoop to their level and engage them.  And I will let it go.  smile  

   Your English is better then some who were born here including me.  



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Lexxy


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I agree with Lindley. I would have never guessed English wasn't your first language. I also think you present yourself very well. That other board sounds like a bunch of jerks. I'm glad it didn't get to you.

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Ohfour


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Lexxy wrote:

I agree with Lindley. I would have never guessed English wasn't your first language. I also think you present yourself very well. That other board sounds like a bunch of jerks. I'm glad it didn't get to you.

That's the same board that several of them said they would get pregnant just to have an abortion to support the cause.  Bottom feeders, one and all... 



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Lexxy


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Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:

I agree with Lindley. I would have never guessed English wasn't your first language. I also think you present yourself very well. That other board sounds like a bunch of jerks. I'm glad it didn't get to you.

That's the same board that several of them said they would get pregnant just to have an abortion to support the cause.  Bottom feeders, one and all... 

 WTF?!?  I am pro choice but it really should be a well thought out decision.  That is just disgusting.



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flan327


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I will say that I witnessed part of this.

I'll stop there.

flan

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Ohfour


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Lexxy wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:

I agree with Lindley. I would have never guessed English wasn't your first language. I also think you present yourself very well. That other board sounds like a bunch of jerks. I'm glad it didn't get to you.

That's the same board that several of them said they would get pregnant just to have an abortion to support the cause.  Bottom feeders, one and all... 

 WTF?!?  I am pro choice but it really should be a well thought out decision.  That is just disgusting.

 Yes.  That thread (which has since been deleted) chilled me to the core.  The pure evil that was relayed was disturbing.



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Lawyerlady


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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

I'm not gonna lie, there's some people who I care what they think of me. Not here though.

 But, but, but......



-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Wednesday 25th of March 2015 01:54:58 PM

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LawyerLady

 

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just Czech


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Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Lexxy wrote:

I agree with Lindley. I would have never guessed English wasn't your first language. I also think you present yourself very well. That other board sounds like a bunch of jerks. I'm glad it didn't get to you.

That's the same board that several of them said they would get pregnant just to have an abortion to support the cause.  Bottom feeders, one and all... 

 WTF?!?  I am pro choice but it really should be a well thought out decision.  That is just disgusting.

 Yes.  That thread (which has since been deleted) chilled me to the core.  The pure evil that was relayed was disturbing.

Those posters are as chilling today as they were when that thread originated. I remember it well. IMHO, the devil has a very firm hold on several of those individuals. They scream the loudest when faced with the truth. 



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Lexxy


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I don't think I could post with people like that. I wouldn't even want to associate with them anonymously. Just ick.

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just Czech


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Lexxy wrote:

I don't think I could post with people like that. I wouldn't even want to associate with them anonymously. Just ick.

Entertainment factor. biggrin

And, you get to realize there really are people like that in the world. A whole lot of them and they clump together. wink 



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I drink coffee so I don't kill you.

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Blankie


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Wow, RTL! Good for you for rising above and not taking the bait.



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I thought Blankie was blue. Man! I was wrong!

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Blankie


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TrudyML wrote:

I thought Blankie was blue. Man! I was wrong!

Whatever does that mean? Blue as in smurf-like? 



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No matter how educated, talented, rich or cool you believe you are,

how you treat people ultimately tells all.

Integrity is everything.
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