TOTALLY GEEKED!

when something is deeply moving, tears are a natural reaction--moments / feelings--when a Canadian audience sang the Star Spangled Banner at a sports event in Canada shortly after 9/11--playing taps at a close friend's funeral long ago--walking into a hospital in Europe after a sixteen-hour flight and seeing my lady still alive and in one piece--taking my father's hand in both of mine for the last time and saying goodbye--looking into my mother's eyes and seeing her love for me on her last night with us--carrying Lance ( our golden ) out to the corner of our property and watching my lady place a single rose under his chin after we'd laid him in a canvas sail and set him in the ground--so many things--pride, relief, beauty, loss, joy, etc.

have never seen them as a weakness in myself or in someone else

lilyofcourse wrote:

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Yall are confusing yourselves.

I didn't say every time.

When you witness a moment like a wedding, you cry because you are happy for them. True. But some also cry because they are sad they don't have something they think the couple marrying has.

I don't know how much more I can explain it.

And I don't understand how hung up yall are on this one thing.

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 And we have tried to explain WHY:

1. Because we have never heard that opinion.

2. Because it doesn't make sense.

flan

I get what Lily is saying. I think most of the time when I cry at a happy event it's out of happiness but if I want to be honest.....the tinge of sadness.....well it makes sense now whether it was conscious or not.
Not that it happens often....not at all.

I cry for joyful things. That's just my spirit.

I also cry when I have very strong emotions. Good and bad.
I don't think that is unusual, or that if I cry when I am happy it means I am actually sad.

I don't recall anyone saying it characterizes ALL of us. It's a different perpective.

Wow. There is a lot of women hating on this thread. From women.

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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Wow. There is a lot of women hating on this thread. From women.

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 Right? I was trying to make the point that I think women should get along and have each other's backs but I guess we are all too bitchy to ever achieve that.

VetteGirl wrote:

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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Wow. There is a lot of women hating on this thread. From women.

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 Right? I was trying to make the point that I think women should get along and have each other's backs but I guess we are all too bitchy to ever achieve that.

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 Honestly, I am so exhausted having my own back and DH's back, and my kids' backs...I don't want to have anyone else's back. Have your own back. In this life, you can't trust anyone you arent related to (and some people here couldn't trust the ones they WERE related to). It's better to just count on yourself. When push comes to shove, that friendly person you met at work will shank you for a raise or a promotion so you are better off just counting on yourself. 

Thats bitchy I know. But it's honest. I wish the world was different but it isnt. If you go around thinking everyone will have your back you will have a lifetime of disappointment. 

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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Wow. There is a lot of women hating on this thread. From women.

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Dona, it's not "hating," but the delivery leaves something to be desired, imo.

flan 

VetteGirl wrote:

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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Wow. There is a lot of women hating on this thread. From women.

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 Right? I was trying to make the point that I think women should get along and have each other's backs but I guess we are all too bitchy to ever achieve that.

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Well, think about how.  How many all girl bands have managed to stay together?    Men are much better at handling their petty crap.  And, what about female dominated professions?  They  are sooo worried that someone in the same profession makes $1 more than they do.  And, instead of thinking "oh, I should negotiate better and ask for more", they go on a destroy mission.  I have seen it.  If someone makes more than me, I think to myself, well, then there is room to grow.  But the vast majority of women I have worked with find that as a personal slight to them instead of being happy for their coworker or using it as motivation for themselves. 

I have never had any problem working with women. Ever. No more or less than working with men. I don't hold them to higher expectations, I don't expect them to band together into a sisterhood or expect them to watch my back against the evil nasty men in some 'It's us against the MAN " type thing.

Lawyerlady wrote:

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I love women. But I expect a lot of them. I don't have patience or regard for women that can't have a relationship with other women or can't be trusted. It is a sisterhood - and I think it should inspire a certain type of loyalty.

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I wish we could act as a sisterhood.  However, I find that men will band more readily together for a common cause.  Women sometimes try but then it all falls apart in the personality conflicts and petty details. 

lilyofcourse wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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Insecurities.

That's my answer to why we are our own worse enemies. We tend to project our own failings and short comings on others.

Kind of the same reason we cry at happy events.

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I disagree.  Some women are just bee itches.   

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 Yeah, jealous haters.

And I don't understand why crying at a happy event means you're insecure?

flan

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Yeah, that seemed pretty random to me.  What does that have to do with anything?     

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I have the crappy laptop today so responding takes a while. I am not a patient person.

I am responding to both of you.

Hating and jealousy is from feeling another has something you lack.

Why are some women b-words? Because they are lacking something. They are over compensating for something they feel they don't have or need to hide.

Crying at happy events has the same underlying reasoning. We are happy for them but sad because we don't have something we think they have.

It's all in our own heads.

And we over compensate and hide behind these walls.

Basic high school Phycology.

Now the we is general. So if anyone wants to take it personally, well maybe ask yourself why.

 

 

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 This. You see this Flan?

So why are you taking this so personally?

 

Are you for chastity?

VetteGirl wrote:

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 Amen to that.

I am not saying I haven't met some incredible professional women. Of course I have. But, they aren't the problem and they don't contribute to our "own worst enemy" situations. Women are their own worst enemies. Women seem able to band together on other things. Like the Booster clubs and team moms and the Community driven centers and food banks and church dinners, etc. Women seem to be the impetus for the vast majority of things that go in the community. However when it comes to employment, there seems to be a disconnect where it becomes more about tearing down another female who is perceived to have on up on them or makes a tad bit of more money or whatever. It is sad really.

That's good. If you can weed out the ONE, then usually things settle down, lol. For the most part, I get along fine with the ladies I work with. They all do their jobs and we all make a good team. I have worked at other places though where the women were very passive aggressive. They wouldn't outwardly refuse to do anything but they would do their jobs in a way to say "F U" to whomever had the displeasure to have to work with them.

flan327 wrote:

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In our department, there are 6 women as well. Honestly, only one is drama free and she is the one who works the fewest hours. We usually work Thursday nights and make a good team.

Now, the others...2 are mostly okay...that leaves 2...

flan

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which one are you  ?