TOTALLY GEEKED!

Divine Geek wrote:

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I'm not lazy or unorganized.……I'm sick.

I spend my day being happy and upbeat at work. I try very hard to not be grumpy, which when you are exhausted is hard work. I am a go-getter at work, I am highly organized and efficient. Basically, I give everything I have just to get through the work day and do my job the way I feel it should be done. When I get home, I have nothing left. Yes, my living area needs dusted. Yes, there are dishes to be washed. Yes, there is laundry to fold. But I just don't have the energy. I get what I can done on the weekends, but it's overwhelming still.

I don't like that it looks like I'm a slob. I just can't do much about it on most days.

Many people with my condition can't hold a job. They live on disability and allow themselves to sleep their lives away. I refuse to let that happen. So I live with some dirty clothes on the floor and dog hairs on the couch. But I go to work and trick most people into believing I'm "normal"

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  My house looks like I'm a slob and I'm relatively healthy. You deserve a huge pat on the back.

Did you ever go to that conference?

flan

FNW wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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My sense of humor.

Very few actually get it. Get me.

My humor can be dark. I can find humor in some of the worst situations. I've learned to temper it. To hide it. But some times I will snicker at the wrong time or make a comment and I get that look.

I have had people tell me I am evil because of my sense of humor.

I guess I can get twisted at times.

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 I laughed at a funeral.   

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 Me too. The funeral home we had my grandma at is a very old house. I said I heard something creaking. My cousins told me it was just the house. Then, about 15 minutes later, the flowers on the back of the casket fell right on grandma. I go, "I told you I heard something!" And we all burst out laughing. 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I thought this was a serious thread. Then I saw some of the posts. I'm so glad I didn't share.

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 Is there a problem?  I see some setious posts.

lilyofcourse wrote:

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I guess we can have more than one, right.

I wish people understood that I didn't give up. That my body stopped and won't allow me to do the smallest things any more.

I actually vented a little last week in the break room about it, then turned around and deleted it.

People like to tell others what they should do. But they don't understand how much it hurts to be told "don't just give in" when they don't know how embarrassing and degrading it is to need help with the little things. How your life changes from always going and doing to not being able to put your socks on.

And telling me to try harder is like telling a blind person to see better.

Believe me. Fighting to keep mobility is the most important thing I do. I fight hard and by the minute.

I wish people could understand that I am still the same person inside.

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 Lily, I admire you. I know I can be argumentative with some of your posts, but you have a physically debilitating situation.  One I hope never to experience, yet you take care of your family. You do so much, more than I think I could do with your issues. so I just wanted to say that.

Thanks IKWTDS.

And I am the same. I have learned how to separate emotion from logic.

Had to.

It makes me come off as a B word a lot of the time.

Edit to add, the most valuable lesson I ever learned was to work on the things I could and not worry about the things I cant. 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I thought this was a serious thread. Then I saw some of the posts. I'm so glad I didn't share.

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Elaborate.

flan 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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Divine Geek wrote:

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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I thought this was a serious thread. Then I saw some of the posts. I'm so glad I didn't share.

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 You can share anything you would like. my post was completely serious. I do wish people understood the struggle I go through instead of judging me on their scale. 

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 Yours was quite serious and I have talked to you about your sleep disorder.  I understand.  Which means I understand as much as someone who doesn't have the disease can understand.  I say that because when I share with people that I have an autistic son they will say something like I understand and I sometimes want to scream at them and say NO YOU DON'T!

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 I totally get that feeling. I resist that urge on a regular basis

I walk the walk and talk the talk.  My behavior is consistent.

That I am quite disciplined and have principles and morals I will not compromise on.   Period.

I prefer to be non-confrontational by choice and would rather walk away instead of engage.  This is only because I know myself and just how much damage I can and have caused to others psychologically and physically.  I have a formidable fury that I keep well in check.  I have lost friends and a lot more due to it.  I fortunately am very emotionally intelligent and emotionally resilient enough to able to show a great amount of restraint in this area.

I can be cold, heartless and unemotional if I need to be.  I can also be kind, caring, supportive, empathetic and incredibly understanding and tolerant.  (And no, I do not suffer from any MI.  The way I am is colored by my life experiences, none of which I ever expect others to understand if they have not lived the life I did).  For the most part, I am mellow, good-natured, and altruistic.  I genuinely care about most people. 

I do have my limits of tolerance, however, for those who are emotional vampires or those whose emotions are all over the map.  People who whine, bitch, moan and complain a good deal of the time can have at it without me.  The "woe is me" mentality or those who have to be the center of attention, are needy and "it's all about me, me, me", I keep away from.  Add to the list those who compare themselves to others, as well as those who are always venting about how their life is sooooo hard, no one understands them, or are "Debbie Downers"; and yet, they continue along the path instead of sincerely making an effort to improve their life and outlook.   If someone wants to throw a pity party, I can do without an invitation.  People who continuously make excuses for their lives and why they feel and act the way they do can find others to commiserate with.   Petty bickering may be entertaining for others, but not for me.

My sense of humor is just not gotten or appreciated by others.  People are so overly sensitive and offended about everything that I prefer to keep my humor under wraps.

I am honest.  I can also be brutally honest, which I have found many cannot deal with.  And I have some mad skills, again honed through my life experiences.  I do not feel the need to compare myself to others.  How can I when our lives have been and are so different?  I also don't do "fake".

I do my best to live a good, clean life and to help those who really do need it.   As I have said in previous posts on this forum, I really do work on improving myself and who I am.  I strive to become a better being.  When I become a better being, I can also better help others. 

And just a couple of quotes that really hit home for me due to life experiences.  They are unfortunately too lengthy to post as a signature line:

"A big big mistake. Really huge. Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put in a trap—if you're smart, if you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow—there's one thing you never ever put in a trap. . . . . . . . . .Me."  -- The Doctor, "The Time of Angels"

"He never raised his voice. That was the worst thing... the fury of the Time Lord... and then we discovered why. Why this Doctor, who had fought with gods and demons, why he had run away from us and hidden. He was being kind."  --  Son Of Mine, "The Family of Blood"

Divine Geek wrote:

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Just because I do not like mayo & salad dressing does NOT make me a picky eater. When I mention I don't like something, I get called picky. The problem is that those couple of things I don't like seem to be in a lot of things.

And no, I'm not one of those people who has 17 alterations to my order. I try not to order things I have to change, other than simple stuff, like no mayo on my sandwich or no dressing on my salad.

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I ALWAYS specify no mayo on sandwiches that might have it, and 

I always ask for dressing "on the side".

If anyone said it was "picky" because of that, I'd probably ask them my THEY would accept something they don't want.

Or I'd just ignore them and move on.

(Don't pass the Ranch Dressing, please.)

ed11563 wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Sometimes I don't know how to connect with people. I rarely find people that are interested in the things that I am. I can have long deep conversations about philosophy, politics, religion, the meaning of life, etc. But in reality, most people just want to discuss the Kardashians or whatever. People really don't want "deep" conversations. I used to find it perplexing that others did not want to really examine Why they are here or really look deeply into the existential questions of life. But, I have just accepted that they don't. Which is probably why I enjoy message boards. We get into much deeper conversations here about every topic under the sun than I can IRL. I enjoy that type of conversation.

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I might not be the best one to make a suggestion, but here it is anyway:

Don't try to talk about the things you are interested in. Ask about the things the other person is interested in.

Keep asking open-ended questions. "Tell me more" is almost always received well.

If you get the other person to do 90% of the talking, they will want to talk with you a lot more.

 

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  I know Ed.  And, that is good advice.  But really, I am tired of being the one putting forth the effort.  The other day, I was with some people who were friends with my kids.  We started chatting a bit.  Finally, I said, "Oh, I am so so , K's mom".  Then they finally introduced themselves as well.  Then I was going to continue to chat a bit but instead the cell phones, etc are more important.    Then Dh came and he chatted a bit and he introduced himself.  I get tired of always being the one to introduce myself.  I know it's a small thing, but at some point in life things have to be a 2 way street.  I now prefer to wait for cues.  If someone is cueing a bit more interest in chatting, then I will happily chat with them.  Otherwise, I just don't have the energy to burn on people anymore. 

VetteGirl wrote:

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I wish people understood that I really don't want to have children and to stop lecturing me about it. There is nothing wrong or selfish about my choice and it's my business, and flooding me with pictures of kids or babies won't change my mind. Also telling me that I'm young and will change my mind is really annoying. That's mostly because I can't be pregnant on my meds so even if I wanted to I couldn't, so I'm lucky I don't feel the urge. But I don't usually feel the need to give people that much info.

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It is strange that people feel the need to push this kind of decision for others. Whether some do or don't is very much none of anyone else's business, never mind you reasons... 

We have one, and even now I get pushed to justify why only one and when the next one is coming. I've learned to bean-dip the s#it out of them, Vette. Seems to work more than not.