TOTALLY GEEKED!

My DH is non-confrontational, and tunes his family out. That, and they would do most of their damage when he was busy working on something for the boys or outside of his presence. He would say something to them, after the fact, when I complained about it on the way home or after they left. So after the fact that they have forgotten (supposedly) and act like they didn't know what he was talking about. Sure, I wanted him to step up and defend my honor while it was occurring, but I came to realize that it's just not in him. That, and he was so used to his family's treatment of him and his ex-wife, that he didn't even notice. So I have chosen not to give them the opportunity anymore, and he has supported my decision.

Knowing my DH is oblivious, I took it upon myself to confront them once. I did so in writing, by an email, following particularly mean behavior towards the boys. I did not say anything at the time, because I wasn't sure if my boys, then 4, understood what they were doing and I certainly didn't want my kids to be hurt and ruin their Easter. But you'd better believe I wrote the email as soon as I got home and I let them have it. They responded, tried to blame me for upsetting them by not allowing extended stays or alone visits with the boys. Basically deflected. My response was simply that since they would not be coming back to our home, we would let them know when we would come up, and if they were really interested in a relationship with the boys, they could skype or do facetime, but that we would be monitoring. They never made any attempts to "see" the boys after that.

flan327 wrote:

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Lexxy wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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Lexxy wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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I'm hungry, but it's too early for my dinner break...

flan

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 It's afternoon snack time.

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 I'm having a rice cake with cream cheese.

flan

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 That sounds positively bland.

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 I'm trying to convince myself otherwise...

flan

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 Try adding a little Polaner all fruit to add some sweetness with little calories next time.  Back in my 20s when I forever dieting I ate a lot of rice cakes with Polaner.  And snacked on dry frosted mini wheats.  I haven't eat either in many years.  It shows too.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I need to give my dog a sedative.

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 Another storm?

FNW wrote:

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My DH is non-confrontational, and tunes his family out. That, and they would do most of their damage when he was busy working on something for the boys or outside of his presence. He would say something to them, after the fact, when I complained about it on the way home or after they left. So after the fact that they have forgotten (supposedly) and act like they didn't know what he was talking about. Sure, I wanted him to step up and defend my honor while it was occurring, but I came to realize that it's just not in him. That, and he was so used to his family's treatment of him and his ex-wife, that he didn't even notice. So I have chosen not to give them the opportunity anymore, and he has supported my decision.

Knowing my DH is oblivious, I took it upon myself to confront them once. I did so in writing, by an email, following particularly mean behavior towards the boys. I did not say anything at the time, because I wasn't sure if my boys, then 4, understood what they were doing and I certainly didn't want my kids to be hurt and ruin their Easter. But you'd better believe I wrote the email as soon as I got home and I let them have it. They responded, tried to blame me for upsetting them by not allowing extended stays or alone visits with the boys. Basically deflected. My response was simply that since they would not be coming back to our home, we would let them know when we would come up, and if they were really interested in a relationship with the boys, they could skype or do facetime, but that we would be monitoring. They never made any attempts to "see" the boys after that.

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I'm sorry you have people like that in your life.

Just an idea I've used:

I got a very small, digital voice recorder (mine is from RCA bought at Staples) that will record 16 hours at a time, the file can be downloaded to a computer for playback.

I had a co-worker who would bully me when there were no witnesses. (That's common behavior for bullies.) So any time I thought we might be in a building together, I would start it recording in "conference mode", and just leave it in my pocket.

 

Lexxy wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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Lexxy wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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Lexxy wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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I'm hungry, but it's too early for my dinner break...

flan

---

 It's afternoon snack time.

---

 I'm having a rice cake with cream cheese.

flan

---

 That sounds positively bland.

---

 I'm trying to convince myself otherwise...

flan

---

 Try adding a little Polaner all fruit to add some sweetness with little calories next time.  Back in my 20s when I forever dieting I ate a lot of rice cakes with Polaner.  And snacked on dry frosted mini wheats.  I haven't eat either in many years.  It shows too.

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I really like Polaner All-Fruit sugar-free, especially the Grape or Strawberry  Jam. 

Poor baby she was all skin & bones. Did you get her at a shelter or find her on the street? She looks good now.

Mine came from a puppy mill by way of a rescue group. He was terribly ill when I adopted him. He had various intestinal parasites that ate holes in his intestines & his system was being poisoned.

ed11563 wrote:

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FNW wrote:

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My DH is non-confrontational, and tunes his family out. That, and they would do most of their damage when he was busy working on something for the boys or outside of his presence. He would say something to them, after the fact, when I complained about it on the way home or after they left. So after the fact that they have forgotten (supposedly) and act like they didn't know what he was talking about. Sure, I wanted him to step up and defend my honor while it was occurring, but I came to realize that it's just not in him. That, and he was so used to his family's treatment of him and his ex-wife, that he didn't even notice. So I have chosen not to give them the opportunity anymore, and he has supported my decision.

Knowing my DH is oblivious, I took it upon myself to confront them once. I did so in writing, by an email, following particularly mean behavior towards the boys. I did not say anything at the time, because I wasn't sure if my boys, then 4, understood what they were doing and I certainly didn't want my kids to be hurt and ruin their Easter. But you'd better believe I wrote the email as soon as I got home and I let them have it. They responded, tried to blame me for upsetting them by not allowing extended stays or alone visits with the boys. Basically deflected. My response was simply that since they would not be coming back to our home, we would let them know when we would come up, and if they were really interested in a relationship with the boys, they could skype or do facetime, but that we would be monitoring. They never made any attempts to "see" the boys after that.

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I'm sorry you have people like that in your life.

Just an idea I've used:

I got a very small, digital voice recorder (mine is from RCA bought at Staples) that will record 16 hours at a time, the file can be downloaded to a computer for playback.

I had a co-worker who would bully me when there were no witnesses. (That's common behavior for bullies.) So any time I thought we might be in a building together, I would start it recording in "conference mode", and just leave it in my pocket.

 

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That's great, ed!  

Actually, the last time we saw them I set my iPhone on the table and set it to record.  It records but the recording screen can be removed so no one knows.  That was at their anniversary party where they sat us in the corner while they re-positioned their chairs so their back was to us.   No need to play anything back that day, we left after lunch without saying goodbye and we haven't seen them since.

 

No. That's Carlee. She has a beautiful coat now. Layla looks great also but she is our doggie with allergies.

Actually she did have a stroke recently, does that mean something?

And he asked me if I wanted him to intervene and I said no, I will handle it when the time comes. I did however have a talk with her when she brought it up in front of his kid, and made it clear that it's not appropriate to talk about it with him around.

VetteGirl wrote:

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Actually she did have a stroke recently, does that mean something?

And he asked me if I wanted him to intervene and I said no, I will handle it when the time comes. I did however have a talk with her when she brought it up in front of his kid, and made it clear that it's not appropriate to talk about it with him around.

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 Good for you!

flan

Supper!!!!!!!! 

 

 

 

 

 

Looks good!

Beer marinated bone in rib eyes. It doesn't get any better...😄

I'm drooling. I had a great dinner but those look awesome!

We don't do anything with beer like that. DH is a recovering alcoholic. However, I have learned that REGULAR COKE (not Pepsi or Dr. Pepper or Sprite) can be substituted and it will work just as good.

That's tough, jlbear.

flan

chef, my mom says when I was your son's age I ate onions like apples. I still love onions. Although I don't eat them like apples anymore!

My mom thought it was funny. She just let me eat them. He's a smart little boy! Tell him I said so.

jlbear71 wrote:

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DH was offered another job today. I think he would like the challenges and slightly better stability at this job. It's as a contractor (most IT is) but the benefits are no where near as decent, deductible would start over again (much higher $5,000 vs $1300) and essentially it would be a $20k/yr pay cut after paying for benefits ($10k salary then paying for benefits/deductible - they do not contribute at all or very minimally).

I still told him he needed to do what he felt was right for him and we would make it work it we had to. However, because I am only working part time and going to school, I don't think he should take this job. Next year, I should be school part time and working full time and will have the ability to get my own medical benefits. His current job should end sometime next year so it would be a little better if he could wait. Plus, he would be able to add the extra responsibilities to his resume then.

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 Yeah, tough time to change jobs.  Good for you for considering the whole compensation package.  A lot of people only look at salary.