TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

RE: Dear Prudie - my fifteen year old is having sex

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

And the rates of kids having sex is going DOWN. Hopefully because parents are talking to them about it and making it clear why it is not a good idea.

Assume your kids will lie and sleep around, and they likely won't disappoint you. Try teaching them why it is bad and having some confidence, expectations and faith in them instead.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 31st of May 2015 06:46:20 AM

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Nobody is "assuming" anything. My sons weren't even interested in girls until 11th grade. So, yeah, you never went to a friends' house and then you went somewhere else from a friend's house? Or somebody else came over that you didn't know was coming to their house? Your mom knew exactly where you were 24/7? You never just thought, oh let's hop on our bikes and head downtown to get some pop or down to the creek or whatever? You had a GPS strapped to your leg as a child? And, you don't think that kids are dating can find some opportunity if they are so inclined be it in the backseat of a car or in the woods or on the sofa an hour before you get home from work or whatever?
As far as I know, none of my kids have engaged in sex. The girls they are dating are very nice girls and I do work with the parents to limit any unchaperoned time. But, we all work. They get out of school here at 230 pm. None of us get home till after 4. I am sure they could find some time if they choose too. I am sure they could go to a school dance together and leave early or any number of things. However, I trust my sons and their girlfriends. But, can I monitor their every waking move? No, I cannot. And, you can't either.
And, the point of parenting is to create trustworthy kids with good judgment so that they can learn to function as an autonomous adult and have the ability to monitor their own behavior in the right way.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Sunday 31st of May 2015 07:15:07 AM

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
And the rates of kids having sex is going DOWN. Hopefully because parents are talking to them about it and making it clear why it is not a good idea.

Assume your kids will lie and sleep around, and they likely won't disappoint you. Try teaching them why it is bad and having some confidence, expectations and faith in them instead.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 31st of May 2015 06:46:20 AM

Yeah, because nobody on this board is doing that. evileye

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Nobody is "assuming" anything. My sons weren't even interested in girls until 11th grade. So, yeah, you never went to a friends' house and then you went somewhere else from a friend's house? Or somebody else came over that you didn't know was coming to their house? Your mom knew exactly where you were 24/7? You never just thought, oh let's hop on our bikes and head downtown to get some pop or down to the creek or whatever? You had a GPS strapped to your leg as a child? And, you don't think that kids are dating can find some opportunity if they are so inclined be it in the backseat of a car or in the woods or on the sofa an hour before you get home from work or whatever?
As far as I know, none of my kids have engaged in sex. The girls they are dating are very nice girls and I do work with the parents to limit any unchaperoned time. But, we all work. They get out of school here at 230 pm. None of us get home till after 4. I am sure they could find some time if they choose too. I am sure they could go to a school dance together and leave early or any number of things. However, I trust my sons and their girlfriends. But, can I monitor their every waking move? No, I cannot. And, you can't either.
And, the point of parenting is to create trustworthy kids with good judgment so that they can learn to function as an autonomous adult and have the ability to monitor their own behavior in the right way.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Sunday 31st of May 2015 07:15:07 AM

MY mother was terrible and I could have been having sex at any age - but, wait, I DIDN'T. Not EVERY teenager has sex - and to say they do and you can't stop it is a disservice to good parents and good kids.

The problem with THIS OP is the attitude that parents just have to accept it as OK because it is going to happen. Well, NO, it is not a foregone conclusion that a 15 year is having sex. That is ridiculous. And it isn't even backed up statistically.

And the freedoms that WE had as kids are GONE. The world we live in is different now. So, YES, I will know where my kids are. Aren't you the one that says no sleepovers? Well, I don't just let my kids go off to places that I don't know the parents and can't check on them and that is not going to change by age 15. Fifteen is still a CHILD - they are not adults, and children should not be having sex. It's not something you treat as anything different than other forbidden things - like drugs, drinking and stealing. It's NOT acceptable. Teach THAT instead of shrugging it off as "teenagers will do it anyway". Well, that whole "they will find a way" crap applies to everything - you going to shrug your shoulders when they start doing drugs, too?

Sex too young affects their LIFE. They can get pregnant, get diseases, get labeled a slut and ruin their reputation. It's not something you shrug off for a 15 year old as inevitable.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 31st of May 2015 07:26:06 AM

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
And the rates of kids having sex is going DOWN. Hopefully because parents are talking to them about it and making it clear why it is not a good idea.

Assume your kids will lie and sleep around, and they likely won't disappoint you. Try teaching them why it is bad and having some confidence, expectations and faith in them instead.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 31st of May 2015 06:46:20 AM
Yeah, because nobody on this board is doing that.

Certainly not nobody - but several seem to assume their kids can't be trusted and will lie and sleep around.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan

Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.

But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.
But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.
flan

Then she needs to lose the opportunity to say yes. She's fifteen. She doesn't even need to be dating.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.
But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.
flan
Then she needs to lose the opportunity to say yes. She's fifteen. She doesn't even need to be dating.

The mother sent the wrong message by allowing her to date when she was FOURTEEN.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.
But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.
flan
Then she needs to lose the opportunity to say yes. She's fifteen. She doesn't even need to be dating.
The mother sent the wrong message by allowing her to date when she was FOURTEEN.
flan

Yes, I agree.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.
But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.
flan

Exactly. The cat is out of the bag. Be it a precocious kid, an overzealous BF or bad parenting or all or none of the above. The point is what should she do NOW? I have been resoundly criticized on this board for being cautious in terms of sleepovers and other activities where my kids are out of my sight for hours and hours. I put limits on how late my sons can stay out with their girlfriends. And, if you will recall, there was going to be some overnight camping trip where my son would be there with his GF and I told him Absolutely NOT and I don't care if her mom was OK with it or not. So, yeah, I think I maintain good "control" over my children. But, neither am I naïve enough to think they could not find an opportunity if they really wanted to. Just like they can find opportunities to use drugs, alcohol and do all manner of things, but you hope you are instilling good judgement into them. But, that doesn't mean they won't ever make a mistake either.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I understand what you are saying LL. There are MANY parents around here who don't seem to give a schit where their kids are at all. I am shocked at how little interest there is by some of these parents. And, they routinely let them sleep wherever they please. My son had a friend that had move to a neighboring town. These parents would literally drop this kid off in our town on Friday night and not bother with him or care what he was doing until Sunday evening. He would go around staying over night at various homes all weekend. It was bizarre.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
In this ONE case, she is already having sex, so that complicates the issue.

flan
Not really. Sex is not actually an addiction. Once you've had it, it doesn't mean you have to keep having it. You don't give up your right to say no.
But the daughter doesn't WANT to say no.
flan
Exactly. The cat is out of the bag. Be it a precocious kid, an overzealous BF or bad parenting or all or none of the above. The point is what should she do NOW? I have been resoundly criticized on this board for being cautious in terms of sleepovers and other activities where my kids are out of my sight for hours and hours. I put limits on how late my sons can stay out with their girlfriends. And, if you will recall, there was going to be some overnight camping trip where my son would be there with his GF and I told him Absolutely NOT and I don't care if her mom was OK with it or not. So, yeah, I think I maintain good "control" over my children. But, neither am I naïve enough to think they could not find an opportunity if they really wanted to. Just like they can find opportunities to use drugs, alcohol and do all manner of things, but you hope you are instilling good judgement into them. But, that doesn't mean they won't ever make a mistake either.

That doesn't mean you don't do everything to keep them from continuing and repeating the mistake.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Such as?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I understand what you are saying LL. There are MANY parents around here who don't seem to give a schit where their kids are at all. I am shocked at how little interest there is by some of these parents. And, they routinely let them sleep wherever they please. My son had a friend that had move to a neighboring town. These parents would literally drop this kid off in our town on Friday night and not bother with him or care what he was doing until Sunday evening. He would go around staying over night at various homes all weekend. It was bizarre.

We have C babysitting this summer. We let her bring her friend on Friday - nice girl, I like her. When I got home, the girl's little sister was there. Grandma had just dropped her off at my house to take home since I was taking the other girls anyway. I've never met them, spoken to them, nor was I home, and yet she left a 14 year old at my house. I was like WTF???? Seventeen is a whole lot different than 14. She could have taken off anywhere, and who would know except other teenagers?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Such as?

At fifteen? Any future dates would be in my house or chaperoned, if allowed at all. Once trust was rebuilt a little - all time would be accounted for. No expectation of privacy would exist. There would not be an opportunity to lie. You can't lie about where you are if an adult always has to be present, and spot visits to check are routinely done.

Heck, I know parents who do this already -and they trust their teenagers. But they still know where they are and who they are with at all times.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Yes. I call my house "the home for Wayward boys". There were several of my son's friends who really seemed like they had parents who didn't give a damn. The one boy, my sons called "their brother from another mother". He was extended an open invitation to eat dinner with us any time. One day, I was making a roast chicken and mashed potatoes and his eyes were huge and he was like "this is just like Thanksgiving dinner!". I have had kids tell me their parents NEVER cook them a meal. It is really pathetic.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Such as?
At fifteen? Any future dates would be in my house or chaperoned, if allowed at all. Once trust was rebuilt a little - all time would be accounted for. No expectation of privacy would exist. There would not be an opportunity to lie. You can't lie about where you are if an adult always has to be present, and spot visits to check are routinely done.
Heck, I know parents who do this already -and they trust their teenagers. But they still know where they are and who they are with at all times.

I would not allow dating either. But, my point is that if there is a will, there is a way. And, nature has made it possible since the beginning of time for the will to find its way, be it behind the horse barn, in the field or after school in a car. Yes, you raise your kids, you chaperone them, but there are still kids who will push the envelope.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Yes. I call my house "the home for Wayward boys". There were several of my son's friends who really seemed like they had parents who didn't give a damn. The one boy, my sons called "their brother from another mother". He was extended an open invitation to eat dinner with us any time. One day, I was making a roast chicken and mashed potatoes and his eyes were huge and he was like "this is just like Thanksgiving dinner!". I have had kids tell me their parents NEVER cook them a meal. It is really pathetic.

And then they are shocked - SHOCKED - when the kids do things wrong or end up as teenage parents.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Such as?
At fifteen? Any future dates would be in my house or chaperoned, if allowed at all. Once trust was rebuilt a little - all time would be accounted for. No expectation of privacy would exist. There would not be an opportunity to lie. You can't lie about where you are if an adult always has to be present, and spot visits to check are routinely done.
Heck, I know parents who do this already -and they trust their teenagers. But they still know where they are and who they are with at all times.
I would not allow dating either. But, my point is that if there is a will, there is a way. And, nature has made it possible since the beginning of time for the will to find its way, be it behind the horse barn, in the field or after school in a car. Yes, you raise your kids, you chaperone them, but there are still kids who will push the envelope.

But it's not all kids. And the way requires opportunity. I don't have a horse barn, and why would my fifteen year old be in a car with a boy after school?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I just explained that didn't I? Our High School lets out at 2:30pm. Are you always going to be home before your teens get home? Sorry, but most of us are working past that. Could they meet up at 2:30? Yes.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I just explained that didn't I? Our High School lets out at 2:30pm. Are you always going to be home before your teens get home? Sorry, but most of us are working past that. Could they meet up at 2:30? Yes.

So, your kids just wander until you get off work? No one picks them up or they are not required to take the bus home?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

My kids can walk home from school or take the bus. It isnt' that far. And, so, yeah, any kids could easily walk home to my house with them.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I just explained that didn't I? Our High School lets out at 2:30pm. Are you always going to be home before your teens get home? Sorry, but most of us are working past that. Could they meet up at 2:30? Yes.
So, your kids just wander until you get off work? No one picks them up or they are not required to take the bus home?

Yeah, LL, my kids "just wander until I get off work". Not sure why you have to do the personal attack thing. My kids are very well behaved and I trust them. But if you want to keep attacking my parenting, I am done with this thread.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
I just explained that didn't I? Our High School lets out at 2:30pm. Are you always going to be home before your teens get home? Sorry, but most of us are working past that. Could they meet up at 2:30? Yes.
So, your kids just wander until you get off work? No one picks them up or they are not required to take the bus home?
Yeah, LL, my kids "just wander until I get off work". Not sure why you have to do the personal attack thing. My kids are very well behaved and I trust them. But if you want to keep attacking my parenting, I am done with this thread.

You are the one saying I can't possibly know where my kids are all the time and refusing to see that yes, I can. The opportunities you describe for your kids to do things are of a parent's making. I will not make the same choices, so I would appreciate you not telling me what I can and cannot know about the times my kids could be having sex. Your little parenting attack thing goes both ways.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

It's my making what time school gets out? Oh ok.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
It's my making what time school gets out? Oh ok.

It's the assumption that just because they get out of school before I get out of work - I can't possibly have arrangements to know where they are and what they are doing.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

What arrangements do I need for a 15 year to old to come home from school?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

And furthermore, the assumption that kids will have sex just because the opportunity IS there is wrong. Not every fifteen year old is having sex or even wants to have sex. I find that assumption absurd.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan

Ack!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan

And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

During the short experience with the foreign exchange student, A, it became very apparent that the parent's supervision or lack there of was the biggest factor in which kids ran wild and which ones did not. A started off hanging around with kids that I knew and knew their parents, similar values as me. A was in Cross Country. After a month she dropped out of cross country and starting hanging with different kids, ones I did not know. And that is when the trouble started. Even the good kids wouldn't hang with her anymore.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
And furthermore, the assumption that kids will have sex just because the opportunity IS there is wrong. Not every fifteen year old is having sex or even wants to have sex. I find that assumption absurd.

I didn't assume that kids will have sex. I said, that if there are some who have that inclination to do it, that yes, they are going to find a way. That doesn't mean I condone it, encourage it or whatever. Just like there are kids who will try drugs, alcohol , etc. That doesnt' mean you go out and buy them beer and rent them a hotel room. Two completely different things to understand that there is potential opportunity versus actively encouraging it.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan
And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.

It's not abnormal, either.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan
And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.

Who said it was the Norm?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
What arrangements do I need for a 15 year to old to come home from school?

Now that really depends on if your child has proven untrustworthy or not.

My kid will get picked up and taken home or to work or she will ride the bus home. And this is also why I will always have a home phone with no call forwarding features. She will have to answer the home phone when I call. And the security system will show me who is there.

In this day and age - it's really not that hard to always know where your kids are. There is even GPS on the cell phones if you want to use it.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan
And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.
It's not abnormal, either.
flan

Really? Please tell me how many people you personally know that had sex IN school.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
What arrangements do I need for a 15 year to old to come home from school?
Now that really depends on if your child has proven untrustworthy or not.

My kid will get picked up and taken home or to work or she will ride the bus home. And this is also why I will always have a home phone with no call forwarding features. She will have to answer the home phone when I call. And the security system will show me who is there.
In this day and age - it's really not that hard to always know where your kids are. There is even GPS on the cell phones if you want to use it.

And, you didn't think you can answer the phone while being engaged in something? Yeah, security will show you AFTER the fact, unless you are monitoring your home online. But, actually most of us don't have cameras in our home.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan
And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.
It's not abnormal, either.
flan
Really? Please tell me how many people you personally know that had sex IN school.

Read the first page of the thread.

flan

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
And furthermore, the assumption that kids will have sex just because the opportunity IS there is wrong. Not every fifteen year old is having sex or even wants to have sex. I find that assumption absurd.
I didn't assume that kids will have sex. I said, that if there are some who have that inclination to do it, that yes, they are going to find a way. That doesn't mean I condone it, encourage it or whatever. Just like there are kids who will try drugs, alcohol , etc. That doesnt' mean you go out and buy them beer and rent them a hotel room. Two completely different things to understand that there is potential opportunity versus actively encouraging it.

Yes. Which is the point of my problem with the OP. It is two different things for your kid to have sex and for a parent to "just accept it".

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Other posters here have reported having sex IN SCHOOL.

flan
And that's just ridiculous as an example - it is not the norm. There are rarely empty places in school to be having sex. Behavior like that is not normal.
It's not abnormal, either.
flan
Really? Please tell me how many people you personally know that had sex IN school.
Read the first page of the thread.
flan

Besides the ONE person on this thread.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

She gave you one. Isn't one enough? So, if she names two or three or 50 does that somehow change it ?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
She gave you one. Isn't one enough? So, if she names two or three or 50 does that somehow change it ?

Because ONE person doing it does not make it "normal". Furhtermore - I said PERSONALLY know - like friends and family - not the one person claiming it on a message board.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

There are news stories here every week about kids getting caught having sex in school.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
She gave you one. Isn't one enough? So, if she names two or three or 50 does that somehow change it ?
Because ONE person doing it does not make it "normal". Furhtermore - I said PERSONALLY know - like friends and family - not the one person claiming it on a message board.

I realize you said PERSONALLY. Do you think the poster here is lying?

And, yes, I could ask my boys what went on in high school...but they think I'm weird enough already!

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
She gave you one. Isn't one enough? So, if she names two or three or 50 does that somehow change it ?
Because ONE person doing it does not make it "normal". Furhtermore - I said PERSONALLY know - like friends and family - not the one person claiming it on a message board.

Who said it was normal or average or whatever? We are saying it can and does happen if a kid is so inclined to act that way.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
She gave you one. Isn't one enough? So, if she names two or three or 50 does that somehow change it ?
Because ONE person doing it does not make it "normal". Furhtermore - I said PERSONALLY know - like friends and family - not the one person claiming it on a message board.
I realize you said PERSONALLY. Do you think the poster here is lying?
And, yes, I could ask my boys what went on in high school...but they think I'm weird enough already!
flan

No, I didn't say she was lying. I said the fact that she did it doesn't make it a normal occurrence.

Didn't you go to high school? Why would you have to ask your boys? Did you have sex IN school? Do you know of any of your friends having sex IN school?