TOTALLY GEEKED!

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
totallygeeked -> totallygeeked general -> Tat-Calling:’ Commenting on a Girl’s Tattoos Is Now Considered Harassment
Post Info TOPIC: Tat-Calling:’ Commenting on a Girl’s Tattoos Is Now Considered Harassment
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Tat-Calling:’ Commenting on a Girl’s Tattoos Is Now Considered Harassment
Permalink  
 

‘Tat-Calling:’ Commenting on a Girl’s Tattoos Is Now Considered Harassment

 
ADVERTISEMENT
by Katherine Timpf July 2, 2015 12:56 PM
It’s a very serious problem.

There’s a new form of harassment out there, according to the Feminist Internet: “tat-calling,” which is basically when a man comments on a woman’s tattoos.

“I was frustrated and uncomfortable that I couldn’t just go for a simple walk without being left alone, so over the course of 40 minutes, I tweeted (using the hashtag #tatcalling . . . every tattoo-related catcall I received – just to prove a point about what a day in the life of a tattooed woman out in public in a patriarchal society feels like,” Melissa A. Fabello writes in a piece titled “My Tattoos Aren’t an Invitation for Harassment — So Please Stop ‘Tatcalling’ Me” for the blog Everyday Feminism.

“One guy even literally stopped to show me his tattoos,” she continues. (The horror!)

And this is apparently a huge deal. Because, according to Fabello, if you’re a man on the street and you comment on a woman’s tattoos, you’re not just commenting on that woman’s tattoos — you’re “asserting your dominance by way of reminding her that she can’t simply exist without having to entertain the whims of men.”

“Even if you think you’re just paying her a compliment . . . you’re actually reminding her that men, on the whole, feel entitled to her space, time, and especially her body,” she continues. “Because you’re invading all three when you comment on her appearance.”

Fabello explains that she didn’t get her tattoos because she thought they would look good to other people, but because “they feel like love letters written to the parts of my body I grew up hating.” 

 

 

 

Not wanting to give the impression that she’s being ridiculous or anything, Fabello does clarify that if someone “politely excuses themselves for being interruptive and asks me if I’d be comfortable answering a few questions about my tattoos because they’re thinking of getting one and are curious, I always (very kindly) oblige.”

 

She does have a lot of rules for that situation, though. For example: No asking if it hurt, no asking how much it cost, and this:

“Just for the record, everyone, ‘What do they mean?’ isn’t a conversation starter either,” she clarifies. “It’s generally a conversation shut-down-er. Because that’s an incredibly personal question. Don’t ask strangers that. Like, ever.”

Like, ever, guys. Okay?

— Katherine Timpf i

http://www.nationalreview.com/article/420689/tat-calling-harrassment-women-tattoos-everyday-feminism



-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Wednesday 8th of July 2015 02:41:21 PM

__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
Dona Worry Be Happy


Vette's SS!!

Status: Offline
Posts: 2297
Date:
Permalink  
 

Can you tidy it up a bit? I can't read it at all.

__________________
I know what to do_sometimes


Frozen Sucks!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24384
Date:
Permalink  
 

Yeah, big black rectangle covering the article.

__________________

Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.

Frozen is the bestest movie ever, NOT!
Southern_Belle


Nothing's Impossible

Status: Offline
Posts: 16913
Date:
Permalink  
 

Can't see it either but I think I got it. If you want to be covered in tattoos don't get pissed if people comment on it. All mine can be completely covered by clothing but when I choose to wear shorts and a tank I know I am exposing myself to questions or comments.

__________________

A person's a person no matter how small.
chef


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 6644
Date:
Permalink  
 

If you highlight the text, the parts hidden by the black rectangle will show up.

Anyhoo ... I find the line of thinking by the offended party to be absurd. It would never occur to me to be affronted if someone asked about something on my body. I've gotten many questions about the very visible scar on my foot. Never been offended or thought that I was somehow being forced to give into a man's whim.

__________________

~At Gnome in the Kitchen~
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

Don't embellish if you don't want the attention.

Idjits.

__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
Vette


Owl drink to that!

Status: Offline
Posts: 4799
Date:
Permalink  
 

That's like women who get boob jobs being offended when someone looks at their boobs.

__________________

Was it a bad day?

Or was it a bad five minutes that you milked all day?
ed11563


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 9186
Date:
Permalink  
 

She's too stupid to know when someone's trying to pick her up. Since when is it out of line for a guy who has an likes tattoos to try to make friends with a like-minded woman?

 



__________________

The Principle of Least Interest: He who cares least about a relationship, controls it.

Always misinterpret when you can.
burns07


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1586
Date:
Permalink  
 


unless her tattoos are bizarre, in which case she's just another freak show

__________________

" the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. "--edmund burke

 
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

If you turn your body into a walking coloring book, you have got to expect comments.



__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

My body is NOT a coloring book. My tattoos are tasteful & well done.

I have NEVER gotten anything but compliments.

flan

__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

Whatever.

Point is, you paint yourself up, someone is going to comment.



__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

lilyofcourse wrote:

Whatever.

Point is, you paint yourself up, someone is going to comment.

Unless they have...wait for it...MANNERS.

flan 



__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

I don't know why you are so offended. Don't care.

__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

lilyofcourse wrote:

I don't know why you are so offended. Don't care.

But I'm NOT offended.

flan 



__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
Tignanello


My dog name is, Sasha!

Status: Offline
Posts: 5883
Date:
Permalink  
 

The title of this thread is misleading and inflammatory. It's not about 'comments'; it's about men making derogatory comments about women's bodies and men making general comments and then becoming aggressive and abusive when the woman doesn't respond. Let's use our brains, people.

__________________

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not today, Satan.  Not today.
Southern_Belle


Nothing's Impossible

Status: Offline
Posts: 16913
Date:
Permalink  
 

I think some men are just socially awkward and don't know how to engage in a civilized conversation with a lady.

__________________

A person's a person no matter how small.
Southern_Belle


Nothing's Impossible

Status: Offline
Posts: 16913
Date:
Permalink  
 

VetteGirl wrote:

That's like women who get boob jobs being offended when someone looks at their boobs.

 Well mine are natural and I've been getting lewd comments since I was 15 years old. I don't go around with them hanging out but I'm not going to go around in a flour sack either. I just learned to ignore the pigs.



__________________

A person's a person no matter how small.
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

She's a whiner.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Tignanello


My dog name is, Sasha!

Status: Offline
Posts: 5883
Date:
Permalink  
 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

She's a whiner.

 Who?  SouthernBelle?   Lol!  



__________________

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not today, Satan.  Not today.
Southern_Belle


Nothing's Impossible

Status: Offline
Posts: 16913
Date:
Permalink  
 

Tignanello wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

She's a whiner.

 Who?  SouthernBelle?   Lol!  

 Meh, whatever! 



__________________

A person's a person no matter how small.
FNW


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 18703
Date:
Permalink  
 

I'm with lily on this one.

__________________

#it's5o'clocksomewhere
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

I've already got my next one planned.

flan

__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

FNW wrote:

I'm with lily on this one.

 On vacation, this couple was at the pool area with their kids. I'm sure they are lovely people but they were covered with tattoos. Not one or two, I mean full sleeves and full legs and the whole back and chest. I mean covered.

They looked ridiculous. And they were very defensive. If you smiled at them they were offended. If you said anything they were offended. They looked like something from a bad Sci fi carnival side show but they would mouth off if you looked at them. 

Which made others look and talk more.

I felt sorry for their kids.



__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
FNW


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 18703
Date:
Permalink  
 

Personally, and I know it's personal decision, but I don't like pain. I hate needles. Probably why I could never be a heroin addict. And I like my skin too much to desecrate it. And I want to be able to see my skin and check for skin cancer, etc. And I grew up in an era where only musicians, inmates, or sailors got them. And if a woman got them, they were called tramp stamps. I know, a lot has changed. And backgrounds have a lot to do with it. I grew up in a conservative middle-class household where we cared what the neighbors thought.

__________________

#it's5o'clocksomewhere
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

FNW wrote:

Personally, and I know it's personal decision, but I don't like pain. I hate needles. Probably why I could never be a heroin addict. And I like my skin too much to desecrate it. And I want to be able to see my skin and check for skin cancer, etc. And I grew up in an era where only musicians, inmates, or sailors got them. And if a woman got them, they were called tramp stamps. I know, a lot has changed. And backgrounds have a lot to do with it. I grew up in a conservative middle-class household where we cared what the neighbors thought.

 Oh, I totally respect the way you feel. I don't wear makeup & my tattoos represent who I am & what I love: my kids, DH, Kauai...

If you had asked me when I was younger, I would have laughed at the thought of ME ever getting a tattoo.

flan



__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

lilyofcourse wrote:
FNW wrote:

I'm with lily on this one.

 On vacation, this couple was at the pool area with their kids. I'm sure they are lovely people but they were covered with tattoos. Not one or two, I mean full sleeves and full legs and the whole back and chest. I mean covered.

They looked ridiculous. And they were very defensive. If you smiled at them they were offended. If you said anything they were offended. They looked like something from a bad Sci fi carnival side show but they would mouth off if you looked at them. 

Which made others look and talk more.

I felt sorry for their kids.

 Yeah, way too much ink!

flan



__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
FNW


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 18703
Date:
Permalink  
 

I would love to have permanent liner at the waterline (top). That would be my only tattoo. LOL

__________________

#it's5o'clocksomewhere
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

I thought about getting one for years. But never came up with anything I wanted on my body for the rest of my life. I knew I'd get tired of it.

And I am the opposite of FNW, I like needles. I like that feeling. I was always afraid I'd like the process too much.

I'm a freak, I know.

__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

Status: Offline
Posts: 28124
Date:
Permalink  
 

lilyofcourse wrote:

I thought about getting one for years. But never came up with anything I wanted on my body for the rest of my life. I knew I'd get tired of it.

And I am the opposite of FNW, I like needles. I like that feeling. I was always afraid I'd like the process too much.

I'm a freak, I know.

 It's not the same as getting a shot. It's a quick stick, then the needle is gone, then another stick. Anything close to the bone is way more painful then the forearm.

I looked for a long time before I decided on mine.

flan



__________________

You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

I know Flan. Pain like that, doesn't bother me.

__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
ladyloonatic


Regular

Status: Offline
Posts: 367
Date:
Permalink  
 

I posted about this on another thread...

How are tattoos different from the way a person dresses, the way they wear their hair, the number of piercings they have...? Does that mean others are entitles to provide commentary about it? Or ask questions?

While I admit she goes a tad off the rail talking about male dominance and being forced to give in to man's whim, but commenting like that on a strangers appearance is rude, as is staring, pointing, etc.

After a while, I'd get a little testy myself...

__________________
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Status: Offline
Posts: 38325
Date:
Permalink  
 

Well, if you do something that is going to draw attention, don't be offended when it does.



__________________

A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

Yeah, sorry. Gotta say if you're going to get a Mohawk you have to be prepared to have people take a second look. Anytime you do anything "out of the norm" people are going to give you a second glance. Either do it and embrace your way of life or quit bitchin.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Tignanello


My dog name is, Sasha!

Status: Offline
Posts: 5883
Date:
Permalink  
 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

Yeah, sorry. Gotta say if you're going to get a Mohawk you have to be prepared to have people take a second look. Anytime you do anything "out of the norm" people are going to give you a second glance. Either do it and embrace your way of life or quit bitchin.

 So, if I have a mohawk and someone makes an obscene comment on the street about it and I choose not to respond I don't get to be upset when the obscene-comment-maker becomes verbally abusive?



__________________

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not today, Satan.  Not today.
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

Where did I say make an obscene comment? Not one place. I didn't say that at all. No one should be making obscene comments about anything. I guess I don't understand where all the butt hurt is coming from. If I'm wearing a turquoise necklace and I'm standing in line at the grocery store and the lady behind me says, "I love your necklace. Where did you get it from?" Then, according to some, I'm supposed to be butt hurt because no one is supposed to comment on anything at any time. I think there's a HUGE difference between asking an honest question and making conversation than being a d1ck. How many times do people complain about how unfriendly people are. I DO think tats are a conversation starter. I have a small one on my ankle. When/if people ask me about it I never think to get all butt hurt and tell them it's none of their damn business. It's usually the same simple questions so it's not a big deal. If I don't want to share the meaning I just say it's personal to me. I'm not sure why people have to over think so much.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

And here's what she bitched about... She complains that a compliment was someone actually invading her space. Now that's OBSCENE. She complained that one man showed her his tattoos. Okay, a little TOO much conversation but maybe he thought she was pretty? Trying to pick her up? OMG THAT IS OBSCENE. She states any comment at all reminds her of men's dominance over her. Yes, that IS obscene. Because she has issues. Not one of those people said anything bad to her. They just tried to talk to her. That's horrible.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Tignanello


My dog name is, Sasha!

Status: Offline
Posts: 5883
Date:
Permalink  
 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

Where did I say make an obscene comment? Not one place. I didn't say that at all. No one should be making obscene comments about anything. I guess I don't understand where all the butt hurt is coming from. If I'm wearing a turquoise necklace and I'm standing in line at the grocery store and the lady behind me says, "I love your necklace. Where did you get it from?" Then, according to some, I'm supposed to be butt hurt because no one is supposed to comment on anything at any time. I think there's a HUGE difference between asking an honest question and making conversation than being a d1ck. How many times do people complain about how unfriendly people are. I DO think tats are a conversation starter. I have a small one on my ankle. When/if people ask me about it I never think to get all butt hurt and tell them it's none of their damn business. It's usually the same simple questions so it's not a big deal. If I don't want to share the meaning I just say it's personal to me. I'm not sure why people have to over think so much.

 There's a difference between 'wow, I really like your necklace' and 'that necklace would look great wrapped around my ......".  It's the second kind of comment that I am talking about.  Those are the ones that I get.  I think they count as obscene.



__________________

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not today, Satan.  Not today.
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

But she didn't complain about that. She complained about a man giving her a compliment. A compliment. Those were her own words. Not something dirty. I guess I can't figure out how a compliment is obscene.

__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
WYSIWYG


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 3029
Date:
Permalink  
 

Oh. My. God!

She got a compliment on her ink and it was “asserting your dominance by way of reminding her that she can’t simply exist without having to entertain the whims of men.”?

Really?

Wow.

__________________
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

WYSIWYG wrote:

Oh. My. God!

She got a compliment on her ink and it was “asserting your dominance by way of reminding her that she can’t simply exist without having to entertain the whims of men.”?

Really?

Wow.

   And if a compliment is harassment then I would like to get harassed more please.



__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Lady Gaga Snerd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 25897
Date:
Permalink  
 

WYSIWYG wrote:

Oh. My. God!

She got a compliment on her ink and it was “asserting your dominance by way of reminding her that she can’t simply exist without having to entertain the whims of men.”?

Really?

Wow.

Yeah, get over yourself lady!  Sheesh. 



__________________

https://politicsandstuff.proboards.com/
Ohfour


Hooker

Status: Offline
Posts: 12666
Date:
Permalink  
 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
WYSIWYG wrote:

Oh. My. God!

She got a compliment on her ink and it was “asserting your dominance by way of reminding her that she can’t simply exist without having to entertain the whims of men.”?

Really?

Wow.

   And if a compliment is harassment then I would like to get harassed more please.

I know, right????? 



__________________

America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...
Lawyerlady


On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Status: Offline
Posts: 27192
Date:
Permalink  
 

Tignanello wrote:

The title of this thread is misleading and inflammatory. It's not about 'comments'; it's about men making derogatory comments about women's bodies and men making general comments and then becoming aggressive and abusive when the woman doesn't respond. Let's use our brains, people.

 Huh?  No where did I see that she said they were making derogatory comments or becoming aggressive.



__________________

LawyerLady

 

I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. 
Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Status: Offline
Posts: 24026
Date:
Permalink  
 

Lawyerlady wrote:
Tignanello wrote:

The title of this thread is misleading and inflammatory. It's not about 'comments'; it's about men making derogatory comments about women's bodies and men making general comments and then becoming aggressive and abusive when the woman doesn't respond. Let's use our brains, people.

 Huh?  No where did I see that she said they were making derogatory comments or becoming aggressive.

   In fact, she even states one of them were trying to compliment her.



__________________


“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
― Maya Angelou
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
totallygeeked -> totallygeeked general -> Tat-Calling:’ Commenting on a Girl’s Tattoos Is Now Considered Harassment


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard