TOTALLY GEEKED!

Ohfour · Hooker

RE: Dear Carolyn

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
No. Really it isnt.
Rumors and innuendo have caused a lot of trouble for people.

And the Bible tells us to not even give the impression that you could be sinning.
And it's respectful of the SO.

Rumors and innuendo ARE sins--variations on the word gossip.

Having lunch with with someone of the opposite gender gives the impression you are having lunch--except to said gossips who are busy doing the actual sinning.

So you should ignore the Bible? Give someone ammunition?

What should and what does are two different things.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Ohfour wrote:
Again, I will rely on the advice of Billy Graham over Husker.

The advice of the Bible over Husker.

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
No. Really it isnt.
Rumors and innuendo have caused a lot of trouble for people.

And the Bible tells us to not even give the impression that you could be sinning.
And it's respectful of the SO.

Rumors and innuendo ARE sins--variations on the word gossip.

Having lunch with with someone of the opposite gender gives the impression you are having lunch--except to said gossips who are busy doing the actual sinning.
So you should ignore the Bible? Give someone ammunition?
What should and what does are two different things.

Who said to ignore the bible??? Having lunch with a member of the opposite sex is NOT giving the impression of any sin. That is in your delusional mind ONLY. That is not in the bible.

You our are the one who seems to ignore the commandment about bearing false witness against your neighbor.

huskerbb · Guru

Well, and a few others who are just as delusional.

Ohfour · Hooker

Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
I have to agree.
I mean, C'MON, if you WERE having an affair, it's doubtful that you would be hanging out in public places...
flan
You should know....

Yes, I do know.

So it's okay if I use YOUR past against you?

You know, on second thought, I'd rather not stoop to your level.

flan

Lindley · Guru

Well unfortunetly if you are in a position where someone can think they can make money off you it is wise never to be alone with the opposite sex. My husband as a business owner never is alone with a female employee.

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...

I'm not angry. I just think it's beyond silly--but do what you want to do, just dont pretend it's about "reputation".

huskerbb · Guru

Lindley wrote:
Well unfortunetly if you are in a position where someone can think they can make money off you it is wise never to be alone with the opposite sex. My husband as a business owner never is alone with a female employee.

In a broom closet, no. At a restaurant, no big deal.

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...
I'm not angry. I just think it's beyond silly--but do what you want to do, just dont pretend it's about "reputation".

It does have to do with reputation, but it has more to do with respect for each other.

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...
I'm not angry. I just think it's beyond silly--but do what you want to do, just dont pretend it's about "reputation".
It does have to do with reputation, but it has more to do with respect for each other.

No, it does not. My wife and I respect each other enough so that we trust each other.

Who you have for friends--unless it is someone who has severely wronged your spouse--is not an issue of respect. Quite the opposite. Respect means you can respect your spouse enough that they can choose their own friends.

burns07 · Guru

well, if you operate / own a business you damn sure need to be cognizant of your potential liability--have several female employees and am very careful around them / when I'm with them either here at the store or out in public

have never had an issue ( have been lucky but have also been careful )--if you've never had to deal with a suit ( have been deposed as a witness in two or three ) you're not aware of how harassment suits proceed--it is a plaintiff's game almost all the way and can be VERY expensive

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...
I'm not angry. I just think it's beyond silly--but do what you want to do, just dont pretend it's about "reputation".
It does have to do with reputation, but it has more to do with respect for each other.
No, it does not. My wife and I respect each other enough so that we trust each other.

Who you have for friends--unless it is someone who has severely wronged your spouse--is not an issue of respect. Quite the opposite. Respect means you can respect your spouse enough that they can choose their own friends.

We are more than welcome to chose our own friends. But that doesn't mean he goes to the movies by himself with one of his female friends. That's just stupid...

Ohfour · Hooker

burns07 wrote:

well, if you operate / own a business you damn sure need to be cognizant of your potential liability--have several female employees and am very careful around them / when I'm with them either here at the store or out in public

have never had an issue ( have been lucky but have also been careful )--if you've never had to deal with a suit ( have been deposed as a witness in two or three ) you're not aware of how harassment suits proceed--it is a plaintiff's game almost all the way and can be VERY expensive

Not in the Fantasy Huskerworld...

Ohfour · Hooker

See, here's another thing. G and I LIKE to be around each other. All the time. Neither of us like to be apart at all. He really doesn't do many guys night out and I don't really do girls night out. We may take a trip a year apart, he goes fishing, I go to the beach, but we find that we have much more fun with each other than with anyone else. So really, his friends are my friends and vice versa. Anytime I am invited out by friends, he is always included in the invite. And so am I....

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Why does what me and my husband do anger you so much? I'm relaying our experience. We don't expect everyone to do as we do. You are angry out it. Methinks thou protest too much...
I'm not angry. I just think it's beyond silly--but do what you want to do, just dont pretend it's about "reputation".
It does have to do with reputation, but it has more to do with respect for each other.
No, it does not. My wife and I respect each other enough so that we trust each other.

Who you have for friends--unless it is someone who has severely wronged your spouse--is not an issue of respect. Quite the opposite. Respect means you can respect your spouse enough that they can choose their own friends.

We are more than welcome to chose our own friends. But that doesn't mean he goes to the movies by himself with one of his female friends. That's just stupid...

Why? Why should I have to go see some stupid movie just because my wife wants to? That's absurd.

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
See, here's another thing. G and I LIKE to be around each other. All the time. Neither of us like to be apart at all. He really doesn't do many guys night out and I don't really do girls night out. We may take a trip a year apart, he goes fishing, I go to the beach, but we find that we have much more fun with each other than with anyone else. So really, his friends are my friends and vice versa. Anytime I am invited out by friends, he is always included in the invite. And so am I....

Sure, but sometimes she's working late, or sometimes I am, or sometimes one of us has a meeting or a work trip. Believe me, our friends think my wife and I spend too much time together--but there are times it just doesn't work out that way.

Ohfour · Hooker

I guess I don't live in your world. G has never refused to go see a movie with me. But he get joy from seeing me excited. He's been all over the world, many many times, yet he still get enjoyment from doing it with me. I find your marriage very sad...do you not enjoy watching the excitement on your wife's face?

-- Edited by Ohfour on Tuesday 7th of July 2015 05:22:32 PM

huskerbb · Guru

burns07 wrote:

well, if you operate / own a business you damn sure need to be cognizant of your potential liability--have several female employees and am very careful around them / when I'm with them either here at the store or out in public

have never had an issue ( have been lucky but have also been careful )--if you've never had to deal with a suit ( have been deposed as a witness in two or three ) you're not aware of how harassment suits proceed--it is a plaintiff's game almost all the way and can be VERY expensive

But that doesn't mean never having a business lunch with a client or a sales rep of the opposite sex.

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
I guess I don't live in your world. G has never refused to go see a movie with me. But he get joy from seeing me excited. He's been all over the world, many many times, yet he still get enjoyment from doing it with me. I find your marriage very sad...

LOL!! I would find your marriage sad since you have no trust.

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
I guess I don't live in your world. G has never refused to go see a movie with me. But he get joy from seeing me excited. He's been all over the world, many many times, yet he still get enjoyment from doing it with me. I find your marriage very sad...
LOL!! I would find your marriage sad since you have no trust.

There you go with that trust thing again. If I didn't trust him, he damn sure wouldn't be doing what he's doing almost every weekend...

My position as his wife is the EPITOME of trust.

huskerbb · Guru

Yet he can't have a beer with a female friend who might be in town.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
No. Really it isnt.
Rumors and innuendo have caused a lot of trouble for people.

And the Bible tells us to not even give the impression that you could be sinning.
And it's respectful of the SO.

Rumors and innuendo ARE sins--variations on the word gossip.

Having lunch with with someone of the opposite gender gives the impression you are having lunch--except to said gossips who are busy doing the actual sinning.
So you should ignore the Bible? Give someone ammunition?
What should and what does are two different things.

Who said to ignore the bible??? Having lunch with a member of the opposite sex is NOT giving the impression of any sin. That is in your delusional mind ONLY. That is not in the bible.

You our are the one who seems to ignore the commandment about bearing false witness against your neighbor.

See. You think just because you think having lunch, alone with your female friend/coworker is innocent. And I agree it should just be that. Innocent.

But what about the person who sees it, sees you do the most innocent thing, like lean over to speak because it's a bit loud where you are. You know it is innocent, she knows it is innocent, but someone across the room sees it and misinterpreted it as whispering a sweet nothing.

You did nothing wrong. But the appearance, well it could be misconstrued.

Do you understand how we should flee from the very appearance of sin.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
I have to agree.
I mean, C'MON, if you WERE having an affair, it's doubtful that you would be hanging out in public places...
flan
You should know....
Yes, I do know.
So it's okay if I use YOUR past against you?
You know, on second thought, I'd rather not stoop to your level.
flan

Don't pretend to play the martyr. You have.

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Yet he can't have a beer with a female friend who might be in town.

Sure he could! I wouldn't stop him. But he wouldn't...

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
No. Really it isnt.
Rumors and innuendo have caused a lot of trouble for people.

And the Bible tells us to not even give the impression that you could be sinning.
And it's respectful of the SO.

Rumors and innuendo ARE sins--variations on the word gossip.

Having lunch with with someone of the opposite gender gives the impression you are having lunch--except to said gossips who are busy doing the actual sinning.
So you should ignore the Bible? Give someone ammunition?
What should and what does are two different things.

Who said to ignore the bible??? Having lunch with a member of the opposite sex is NOT giving the impression of any sin. That is in your delusional mind ONLY. That is not in the bible.

You our are the one who seems to ignore the commandment about bearing false witness against your neighbor.
See. You think just because you think having lunch, alone with your female friend/coworker is innocent. And I agree it should just be that. Innocent.
But what about the person who sees it, sees you do the most innocent thing, like lean over to speak because it's a bit loud where you are. You know it is innocent, she knows it is innocent, but someone across the room sees it and misinterpreted it as whispering a sweet nothing.
You did nothing wrong. But the appearance, well it could be misconstrued.
Do you understand how we should flee from the very appearance of sin.

that is not the appearance of sin. Plus, it's laughable that you think all these appearances should be avoided--but say NOTHING about the actual sin going on in that scenario.

-- Edited by huskerbb on Tuesday 7th of July 2015 05:36:55 PM

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Yet he can't have a beer with a female friend who might be in town.
Sure he could! I wouldn't stop him. But he wouldn't...

Sure, because you'd get all butt hurt.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
I have to agree.
I mean, C'MON, if you WERE having an affair, it's doubtful that you would be hanging out in public places...
flan
You should know....
Yes, I do know.
So it's okay if I use YOUR past against you?
You know, on second thought, I'd rather not stoop to your level.
flan
Don't pretend to play the martyr. You have.

Yes, and it made me feel icky.

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Huskerbb, do you not understand what appearance means? I don't think you do.

It's like trying to have a conversation with a child.

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Yet he can't have a beer with a female friend who might be in town.
Sure he could! I wouldn't stop him. But he wouldn't...
Sure, because you'd get all butt hurt.

Yeah, like I do when women throw themselves at him. confuse I think it's funny...

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
Huskerbb, do you not understand what appearance means? I don't think you do.

It's like trying to have a conversation with a child.

I'm relatively certain he DOES understand. He's just disagreeing with you.

flan

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
Huskerbb, do you not understand what appearance means? I don't think you do.

It's like trying to have a conversation with a child.

I do. You are just wrong.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
I have to agree.
I mean, C'MON, if you WERE having an affair, it's doubtful that you would be hanging out in public places...
flan
You should know....
Yes, I do know.
So it's okay if I use YOUR past against you?
You know, on second thought, I'd rather not stoop to your level.
flan
Don't pretend to play the martyr. You have.

Yes, and it made me feel icky.
flan

That's why you do you repeatedly, bring up things like my pas5, my kids.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Huskerbb, do you not understand what appearance means? I don't think you do.

It's like trying to have a conversation with a child.
I do. You are just wrong.

No. You dont.

If you did, you would understand that you don't do something that another may think is sin. That you don't put yourself into situations that could be viewed as even possible immorality.

I'm not responsible for another and the sin they choose to commit. But I can keep myself above reproach.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
And it's not about trusting yourself. Its about perception.
And the perception is that such policies are ridiculous and sexist.
I have to agree.
I mean, C'MON, if you WERE having an affair, it's doubtful that you would be hanging out in public places...
flan
You should know....
Yes, I do know.
So it's okay if I use YOUR past against you?
You know, on second thought, I'd rather not stoop to your level.
flan
Don't pretend to play the martyr. You have.

Yes, and it made me feel icky.
flan
That's why you do you repeatedly, bring up things like my pas5, my kids.

"Repeatedly?"

flan

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Huskerbb, do you not understand what appearance means? I don't think you do.

It's like trying to have a conversation with a child.
I do. You are just wrong.
No. You dont.
If you did, you would understand that you don't do something that another may think is sin. That you don't put yourself into situations that could be viewed as even possible immorality.
I'm not responsible for another and the sin they choose to commit. But I can keep myself above reproach.

That is BS. I don't have any way to know what another might view as a sin. Most are not as delusional as you--but even for the ones who are, I can't pretend to know what is going on in their delusional minds.

Plus, Christ ate with a tax collector which was definitely immoral at the time. He associated with a prostitute. Heck, he dined by himself with two women.

huskerbb · Guru

Also, the verse says abstain from the appearance of evil. Now, committing sins is evil--but it can hardly be argued that NOT committing those sins is evil.

How do you know? Walking down the street could be considered the "appearance " of evil depending on where the beholder thinks you are going. You could be walking towards a strip club 6 blocks away, and to them it might appear you are going there when in actuality you are going to turn in 5 blocks and head another few blocks to church.

Who gets to decide what that appears to be?

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
Also, the verse says abstain from the appearance of evil. Now, committing sins is evil--but it can hardly be argued that NOT committing those sins is evil.

How do you know? Walking down the street could be considered the "appearance " of evil depending on where the beholder thinks you are going. You could be walking towards a strip club 6 blocks away, and to them it might appear you are going there when in actuality you are going to turn in 5 blocks and head another few blocks to church.

Who gets to decide what that appears to be?

You would have to live your life as a hermit, to avoid the appearance of sin or evil.

flan

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

Why isn't "do not bear false witness" being brought up on this topic? A false witness is sinning if they talk about something they THINK they have seen when they haven't.
Sorry, late to the party, but that is what struck me as the worse sin, because... ah... it is a sin.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

just Czech wrote:
Why isn't "do not bear false witness" being brought up on this topic? A false witness is sinning if they talk about something they THINK they have seen when they haven't.
Sorry, late to the party, but that is what struck me as the worse sin, because... ah... it is a sin.

Good point...Late to the party or not, it's always good to see you!

flan

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

LOL Husker. OH 4 and G are awesome together. They like being with each other. They have no desire to go out without the other, but will if the situation calls for it. You really are just being argumentative.

huskerbb · Guru

just Czech wrote:
Why isn't "do not bear false witness" being brought up on this topic? A false witness is sinning if they talk about something they THINK they have seen when they haven't.
Sorry, late to the party, but that is what struck me as the worse sin, because... ah... it is a sin.

I did--but apparently some "appearance" of, well, something (not really sure what) is a sin--but bearing false witness is somehow, not.

huskerbb · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
LOL Husker. OH 4 and G are awesome together. They like being with each other. They have no desire to go out without the other, but will if the situation calls for it. You really are just being argumentative.

But that wasn't the initial premise. Her first posts were about gossip and reputation. She only added the other later after she realized how nonsensical and silly the first premise was.

huskerbb · Guru

flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Also, the verse says abstain from the appearance of evil. Now, committing sins is evil--but it can hardly be argued that NOT committing those sins is evil.

How do you know? Walking down the street could be considered the "appearance " of evil depending on where the beholder thinks you are going. You could be walking towards a strip club 6 blocks away, and to them it might appear you are going there when in actuality you are going to turn in 5 blocks and head another few blocks to church.

Who gets to decide what that appears to be?
You would have to live your life as a hermit, to avoid the appearance of sin or evil.
flan

And who gets to decide? If I saw a man and a woman out to lunch in business attire, I would not jump to the conclusion that they were doing anything other than having lunch unless I saw them holding hands or doing something else more intimate.

Yet, apparently, if there is one person in the world who might think something other than that, then NO ONE on earth should be able to have lunch with a member of the opposite gender--ever--unless they are married or dating.

Ohfour · Hooker

Sure they can. I don't care. I won't do it though. Plus, its not allowed....

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

huskerbb wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
LOL Husker. OH 4 and G are awesome together. They like being with each other. They have no desire to go out without the other, but will if the situation calls for it. You really are just being argumentative.
But that wasn't the initial premise. Her first posts were about gossip and reputation. She only added the other later after she realized how nonsensical and silly the first premise was.

Do your seriously think there is just on factor in people's behavior? Come on Husker, you weren't born yesterday, although I believe some of your opinions were. O4 has a great relationship which reflects the person she is and part of that is not doing things that others may question. Pretty simple concept when one is in the public spotlight. Perhaps that is the issue you don't get.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Ohfour wrote:
Sure they can. I don't care. I won't do it though. Plus, its not allowed....

Shut up, let me talk. biggrin

Ohfour · Hooker

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Sure they can. I don't care. I won't do it though. Plus, its not allowed....
Shut up, let me talk.

Milady... biggrin

huskerbb · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
LOL Husker. OH 4 and G are awesome together. They like being with each other. They have no desire to go out without the other, but will if the situation calls for it. You really are just being argumentative.
But that wasn't the initial premise. Her first posts were about gossip and reputation. She only added the other later after she realized how nonsensical and silly the first premise was.
Do your seriously think there is just on factor in people's behavior? Come on Husker, you weren't born yesterday, although I believe some of your opinions were. O4 has a great relationship which reflects the person she is and part of that is not doing things that others may question. Pretty simple concept when one is in the public spotlight. Perhaps that is the issue you don't get.

No, my opinions on this subject are MUCH more modern. I believe that women and men can be friends without it being sexual.