'I'm a better parent when stoned': Mom-of-three who smokes marijuana while looking after her kids claims the drug helps her to 'more fun and patient' around her children 

• Lea Grover, from Chicago, says she occasionally sneaks off to smoke to reduce her anxiety while at home taking care of her kids
• The 32-year-old doesn't drive high or smoke in front of her children
• She says marijuana makes her less worried about messes and tantrums, and her heightened empathy helps her understand her kids better 
• Even though marijuana has been decriminalized in Illinois, it is not legal to smoke recreationally 

By Carly Stern For Dailymail.com

Published: 10:29 EST, 15 July 2015 | Updated: 13:55 EST, 15 July 2015

One Chicago mother doesn't hesitate to admit that she sometimes gets high while taking care of her kids. In fact, she insists that it makes her a better parent.

Lea Grover isn't a stoner or a pothead. She doesn't even much care for smoking around adults. But the 31-year-old admits that she will indulge now and then while taking care of her three children, and she offers an argument for why others shouldn't be so quick to judge.

Though it's still technically not legal where she lives, Lea claims that smoking marijuana makes her more laid-back, more fun, and even more empathetic to her children's needs. And that, she writes in an essay for Cosmopolitan.com, is good parenting - regardless of the taboo.

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Super mom? Lea Grover says that occasionally smoking while taking care of her three kids makes her a better parent

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Time to relex: The mother-of-three realized when her twins were one year old that she was more empathetic and patient with them when she smoked

Lea doesn't smoke every day, nor does she ever smoke before getting behind the wheel. She doesn't even smoke in front of her kids. While home alone with them during the day, though, if she feels particularly stressed or on edge, she'll sneak away for a quick break and come back buzzed.

The first time Lea smoked was on her fifteenth birthday, which also happened to be 4/20 - known to many of those who indulge as the national marijuana smoking day. Rather than instantly falling in love with the high, however, she felt nauseous, confused, and nervous.

But over time, she began enjoying smoking a bit more, even if she didn't do it often; after taking two puffs of a joint, she'd get 'as high as I like to be'.

Lea hadn't smoked in years when one day, at the age of 26, she was home with her then-one-year-old twins and feeling 'exhausted'. One of her daughters was crying while the other was laughing, and she was stressed.

So Lea visited her 'stash box', which she hadn't touched since before her children were born, and smoked 'a little pot' in the bathroom. 

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Mama's medicine: Lea points to the drugs anxiety-reducing effects and compares smoking to taking Xanax

When she went back to her babies, she felt different. Lea explains that smoking has always made her empathize more - which can sometimes be unpleasant, if it makes you more emotional. But with her 'completely nonjudgmental babies', that empathy was helpful. She felt more in tune with their needs, and was able to understand more easily that her daughter's whine meant she was uncomfortable in her diaper.

So, she took the diaper off - and left it off. While most parents - including Lea, when she wasn't high - would no doubt worry about a naked baby peeing on the floor, Lea suddenly felt carefree. It wouldn't really be a big deal if her child peed on the hardwood floors, she thought. She had a WetJet and could clean it up. It just mattered that her baby was comfortable and happy.

'I realized I was actually sort of a better parent stoned,' she says.

This epiphany led to Lea indulging a little more often. It's not that she 'relies' on it, she explained, but if she is having an especially stressful day, she might walk away, take a toke or two, and come back to her kids more relaxed.

Lea points out that marijuana is 'known to be an effective treatment for anxiety', and anxiety can certainly be induced by playing the role of caregiver to young children. For her anxiety, she could seek a prescription for Xanax or some other medication - but instead, she smokes. Unlike Xanax, marijuana doesn't make her tired, and there's less of a threat of addiction.  

She also found that she felt a difference between smoking around adults and smoking while taking care of her kids. While high with grown-ups, she feels paranoid. With her kids, she's more laid back. She is more patient with all of the stresses of parenthood, and doesn't get frustrated as easily.

'I am able to see the world through their eyes, to remember how hard it is to be a preschooler or toddler, how things that seem obvious to me aren't yet known to them,' she wrote. 'We all have a better day.'

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Hands full: When she is high, Lea says it is easier to deal with her kid's fights, and she is less worried about their messes or tantrums

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Being careful: The 32-year-old says that she doesn't smoke in front of her kids or drive while high

When she's high, she's more willing to have fun and less worried about the mess any given activity will make or the tantrums that might ensue. She'll bake cookies, play board games, and put on kiddie fashion shows. Instead of letting disagreements with her children turn into fights, she'll announce a 'thirty-second time out for everyone' to defuse the situation.

Lea admits that marijuana isn't legal where she lives, though it is 'somewhat decriminalized.' In Illinois, possession of small amounts has been decriminalized and is now only a finable offense.

However, that doesn't mean she's flaunting it. She doesn't smoke in front of her kids and 'probably' won't smoke with them when they are adults, if they choose to take up the habit themselves.

'There are very few adults I'm comfortable being high around, and I would be surprised if my kids made the list,' she explains.

Of course, it'll be a long time before she comes to that point. Her twins are now only five, and she also has a two-and-a-half-year-old - and they can all still be a handful.

'I have three children, and sometimes I smoke marijuana so I can be a better parent to them, because they deserve my best,' she concluded. 'And in my book, anything you can do that makes you a better parent is good parenting

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3162395/Mom-three-says-indulging-marijuana-makes-fun-patient-tune-kids-needs.html#ixzz3g0dLvOwX
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