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Post Info TOPIC: Let the Dead Rest in Peace Without Being Sent Emails
ed11563


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Let the Dead Rest in Peace Without Being Sent Emails

Sep 08, 2015 - 2 of 3
 
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DEAR MISS MANNERS: Twice in the past month, I've been sent emails with lists of recipients that include people who have recently died -- one an invitation to lunch, and another to advise that a high school classmate had died.

In both cases, it was clear from the email's content that the sender knew that the recipients were dead. I was especially horrified to see that the one regarding the classmate who died was sent to the dead classmate (along with around 100 other people).

Is sending email to a dead person to advise the person that he has died appropriate? Would it be more appropriate to cc: the deceased in the event that the surviving family might see and appreciate the email? Would it be appropriate for me to contact the sender(s) and suggest that this is in poor taste?

GENTLE READER: Indeed, Miss Manners agrees that the dead should be allowed the courtesy of resting in peace without being bombarded with emails.

It would be rude of you to correct the sender's manners, so we shall have to call it an oversight, as if it were not an unforgivable one, considering the content of the missive. Then you would simply write suggesting that under the circumstances, these people's names should be removed from the list.



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ed11563


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If the dead person doesn't get an email death notice, how will they know they're dead?

SOOO many people just depend on email for EVERYTHING these days blankstare



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ed11563


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If I stop posting after I'm dead, would someone be kind enough to tell me?

 

 



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Lawyerlady


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People have groups they send emails to. They likely include the dead thinking the family will check the emails.

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ed11563


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Lawyerlady wrote:

People have groups they send emails to. They likely include the dead thinking the family will check the emails.

I'm pretty sure no one will check my email accounts. 



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Ohfour


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Lawyerlady wrote:

People have groups they send emails to. They likely include the dead thinking the family will check the emails.

Either that or they don't realize that the dead person is still on the distribution list. I have many distribution lists.  I'm sure some of the emails are no longer valid... 



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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I don' t think it is "horrifying" for someone to send an email accidently or whatever to someone who is deceased. There are a lot of "horrifying" things in the world. This aint' one of them.

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Ohfour


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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

I don' t think it is "horrifying" for someone to send an email accidently or whatever to someone who is deceased. There are a lot of "horrifying" things in the world. This aint' one of them.

Yeah, why is she horrified? Because someone sent a dead person an email? 



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Nobody Just Nobody


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Eh, when I send my husband an email it gives me an option of sending group emails. I have done group emails with him and SS's teacher and also with him and DN. I have several group emails like that. I just have to click to make sure it doesn't get included.

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Southern_Belle


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What about deceased people on fb? I have two on mine. People leave "miss you" messages on them.

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ed11563 wrote:

If I stop posting after I'm dead, would someone be kind enough to tell me?

 

 

 Do bears **** in the woods?



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Momala


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What I dislike are marketing callers asking for my (deceased) first husband! Good grief people - its been over 8 years!!! Don't you update your lists?????



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Lawyerlady


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Just don't call live people and ask for their death certificates. Please.

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Ohfour


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In the months after my father died, my mother got all kinds of calls about bills he had racked up without her knowledge and not in her name.

They were incessant, even after being told he was dead and faxing the death certificate.

She finally started telling them that he was no longer and this address and gave them the address of the cemetery he is buried in.

She honestly dealt with it for about 3 years after he died. Bill collectors are vicious...


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flan327


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Momala wrote:

What I dislike are marketing callers asking for my (deceased) first husband! Good grief people - its been over 8 years!!! Don't you update your lists?????

 DH1 got a summons for jury duty a few years after he died...

flan



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ed11563


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flan327 wrote:
Momala wrote:

What I dislike are marketing callers asking for my (deceased) first husband! Good grief people - its been over 8 years!!! Don't you update your lists?????

 DH1 got a summons for jury duty a few years after he died...

flan

Did he send in the form asking to be excused? Will they call him again in two years? 

 



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The Principle of Least Interest: He who cares least about a relationship, controls it.

Always misinterpret when you can.
ed11563


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Ohfour wrote:

In the months after my father died, my mother got all kinds of calls about bills he had racked up without her knowledge and not in her name.

They were incessant, even after being told he was dead and faxing the death certificate.

She finally started telling them that he was no longer and this address and gave them the address of the cemetery he is buried in.

She honestly dealt with it for about 3 years after he died. Bill collectors are vicious...

 They work on commission, often between 20% and 50%.

And they don't care who they collect from.

 



__________________

The Principle of Least Interest: He who cares least about a relationship, controls it.

Always misinterpret when you can.
flan327


Itty bitty's Grammy

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ed11563 wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Momala wrote:

What I dislike are marketing callers asking for my (deceased) first husband! Good grief people - its been over 8 years!!! Don't you update your lists?????

 DH1 got a summons for jury duty a few years after he died...

flan

Did he send in the form asking to be excused? Will they call him again in two years? 

 

Actually, I called & finally got a human being & said that he could not serve.

Then she asked me why...

flan 



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