TOTALLY GEEKED!

Bonny22Pye · Guru

RE: Need Some Geeky Advice

Mary Zombie · Guru

I don't think the default should be divorce but that a time may come when the OP might have to make a decision....do we keep talking round and round and something has to change now.
It's not fair to hold the issue hostage so to speak by refusing to address it.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I think Bonny should ignore a lot of the stupid advice. I know she loves her husband very much. I also know that she doesn't want a divorce. And if LOOKING at jobs in other places is enough to threaten your marriage then you didn't have a very good marriage to begin with. I think it is absolutely fine for her to look and present that as an option. But as she says they keep going round and round about it. I think the best option would be for them to sit down with a counselor and see what they both could give a little on so they both find a solution they can be comfortable with.

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

Bonny, I sincerely hope you and your DH find a solution to the problem together.

Life is tough, and it just gets tougher as more people are added to the equation (children).

Good luck and I am sending warm thoughts your way.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

just Czech wrote:
Bonny, I sincerely hope you and your DH find a solution to the problem together.

Life is tough, and it just gets tougher as more people are added to the equation (children).

Good luck and I am sending warm thoughts your way.

I think they will!

flan

FNW · Guru

I have several friends who work for Arcadia Unified School District. They seem to have a pretty good school system. It's much closer, traffic-wise. As is Pasadena. There's also areas like Montrose where you can get to L.A. quickly, if you know the right roads to take. I had a book that gave all kinds of unknown alternate routes when I lived out there. I could make it from San Dimas to Mid-Wilshire in about an hour during rush hour. Now I have heard that traffic has gotten worse in the last few years, too. But if you live near the train line, it might be easier. I know a few years ago I took Mr. FNW on a tour and we picked up the Gold Line in Pasadena and got to Union Station/Alvaro Street pretty quickly. Also, if you have flexible hours where you work, they might permit you to work hours which would allow you to travel off-peak? Or telework? It's just an idea. I know back here, most companies permit this unless you are considered essential, such as doctors, vets, and law enforcement.

Most of my friends and family in California chose private schools for their children. That's pretty expensive, however.

Personally, I left Cali 20 years ago without a backward glance, and never regretted it for a moment. I do miss my family and friends, but that's what visits are for.

chef · Guru

FNW wrote:
I have several friends who work for Arcadia Unified School District. They seem to have a pretty good school system. It's much closer, traffic-wise. As is Pasadena. There's also areas like Montrose where you can get to L.A. quickly, if you know the right roads to take. I had a book that gave all kinds of unknown alternate routes when I lived out there. I could make it from San Dimas to Mid-Wilshire in about an hour during rush hour. Now I have heard that traffic has gotten worse in the last few years, too. But if you live near the train line, it might be easier. I know a few years ago I took Mr. FNW on a tour and we picked up the Gold Line in Pasadena and got to Union Station/Alvaro Street pretty quickly. Also, if you have flexible hours where you work, they might permit you to work hours which would allow you to travel off-peak? Or telework? It's just an idea. I know back here, most companies permit this unless you are considered essential, such as doctors, vets, and law enforcement.

Most of my friends and family in California chose private schools for their children. That's pretty expensive, however.

Personally, I left Cali 20 years ago without a backward glance, and never regretted it for a moment. I do miss my family and friends, but that's what visits are for.

This is me. 8 years and counting since I left SoCal. I don't miss it and don't regret moving. I miss my friends and the remaining family in SoCal but, like you said, that's what visits are for.

The school district I attended was decent as far as education was concerned. However, most of the schools I attended were rich hoity toity schools and had a general 'nose up in the air' attitude. I got bullied because I wasn't one of the rich kids. I didn't thrive in school until 11th grade, when I switched to a poor school.

huskerbb · Guru

I would never live in LA, or probably not even Omaha.

I pursued a career that let me make a good living in a small town. Plus, the cost of living is much lower.

Of course, in your field, jobs in rural areas are probably hard to come by.

As far as your spouse getting a job--he needs to. There's nothing wrong with having dreams, but there's the reality of paying bills, too.