TOTALLY GEEKED!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Is there a double standard?

ed11563 · Guru

And they're all on Welfare. (Okay, maybe not ALL. )

Fort Worth Mom · Mod/Penguin lover/Princess!

No double standard from my point of view.

The poor children are the ones to suffer.

Either way. cry

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

No double standard for me. I realize that people have an accident and then move on to get their lives together. I understand that. When you have six kids by five different daddies no, I don't have sympathy.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I don't know.

Sometimes it seems like there is.

But it depends on the person looking at the situation.

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

A guy with two kids by two different mothers is a scum bag if he has never been married to either one of them.

A woman with kids by different fathers and not married to them is a slut or worse.

I don't necessarily agree with either assessment. Life happens.

If they are not on welfare, good grief, give them a break.

But, people are judgmental, and that isn't going to change anytime soon.

NAOW · Vette's SS

I think there is a bit of a double standard. Society seems to be more accepting of a single man with 3 kids by two different women more than they would a single women with 3 kids by two different men. Just from what I have seen sometimes, the reaction to the first will merit a chuckle and a 'geez, he gets around' and to the second, a look of disgust with 'she needs to close her legs'.

Tignanello · My dog name is, Sasha!

I think maybe we just see the women more as they seem to be the ones carting the kids around. We rarely see the man with a bunch of kids telling us all about his baby-mama-drama . . .

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Tignanello wrote:
I think maybe we just see the women more as they seem to be the ones carting the kids around. We rarely see the man with a bunch of kids telling us all about his baby-mama-drama . . .

I agree one hundred percent.

chef · Guru

No double standard for me, personally. I view both situations as the same thing.

There is a double standard in the world though for those situations even though they're the same.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I think what bothers me a lot these days is that it's no longer the norm to get married when you have kids. I know there are going to be people on this board who flame me for that but what happened to having kids within the confines of marriage? I know way more women who had kids with a b/f or SO and not an actual spouse.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

True.

And people will get that confused look when you are talking and it comes up.

"What? You were married when you had your kids?"

Uh. Yeah. Got married before I got pregnant, all my kids have the same father and they were all born while married.

It seems to really confuse the stars out of people now.

chef · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
I think what bothers me a lot these days is that it's no longer the norm to get married when you have kids. I know there are going to be people on this board who flame me for that but what happened to having kids within the confines of marriage? I know way more women who had kids with a b/f or SO and not an actual spouse.

This. I couldn't think of how to phrase it. No way would I do something as life-changing as having a kid with a man I'm not married to.

-- Edited by chef on Friday 9th of October 2015 10:14:43 PM

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

My friend, or ex friend who knows, who just had her baby is not married to her b/f. They've lived together five years. They have no intentions of ever marrying. I guess I don't understand that. If I felt like I couldn't commit to marrying someone I don't think I'd want to have a child with them.

chef · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
My friend, or ex friend who knows, who just had her baby is not married to her b/f. They've lived together five years. They have no intentions of ever marrying. I guess I don't understand that. If I felt like I couldn't commit to marrying someone I don't think I'd want to have a child with them.

Same here.

WYSIWYG · Guru

I think society has a double standard on this issue. I don't think I do.

Male or female, once is a mistake, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern (and, in this case, not a good one).

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I have to say if I look at someone, male or female, and they have a child by a previous relationship and then have gone on to get married and have another child or two and they are stable (or appear to be) I generally think "Okay, young, made a mistake. No biggie." But when you hit three kids by three different people and keep going then yes, I start judging. I wonder why they didn't get married or at least try to make a relationship work for the kids.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.

Thanks!

That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.

Knight of Hell.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

I also think that Tig was right on the spot that we tend to see women with the kids more so we judge them more. And let's be honest here. Usually the women with three or more kids are more likely to be the ones who are receiving help. I didn't say ALL, I said more likely.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.

Marilyn was sitting on my lap while I posted and she saw your avatar and said UGLY! She saw FNW's shoes and said SO PRETTY! Fire shoes! No, don't move the picture!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.
Marilyn was sitting on my lap while I posted and she saw your avatar and said UGLY! She saw FNW's shoes and said SO PRETTY! Fire shoes! No, don't move the picture!

Oh well. It's for Halloween.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

lilyofcourse wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.
Marilyn was sitting on my lap while I posted and she saw your avatar and said UGLY! She saw FNW's shoes and said SO PRETTY! Fire shoes! No, don't move the picture!
Oh well. It's for Halloween.

She's two. Take it for what it's worth...

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.

Dead Knight of Hell. Go Sam and Dean!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lawyerlady wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.
Dead Knight of Hell. Go Sam and Dean!

Well. Go Dean!

Hehe.

But I did like her.

She had fire.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Tignanello wrote:
I think maybe we just see the women more as they seem to be the ones carting the kids around. We rarely see the man with a bunch of kids telling us all about his baby-mama-drama . . .

Which is unfair b/c the men being careless enough to make all those different children are not the ones taking care of them and most of them are deadbeats that don't pay their child support, either.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

And I'm just gonna ask.

Do you find them even hotter when they are being so very bad?

Soulless Sam was smokin hot. And Deanmon. Well. There are no words.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

lilyofcourse wrote:
And I'm just gonna ask.

Do you find them even hotter when they are being so very bad?

Soulless Sam was smokin hot. And Deanmon. Well. There are no words.

Sam - yeah. Dean, no. I like my regular surly Dean. No evil necessary.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

And see I like the cold, calm torture master Dean.

Guess I'm twisted like that.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

But I'd take either of them any way I could get them.

aergia · Regular

excuse me, a baby is a baby, not a mistake

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oooo spooky avatar Lilly.
Thanks!
That's Abaddon from the show I am obsessed with.
Knight of Hell.
Marilyn was sitting on my lap while I posted and she saw your avatar and said UGLY! She saw FNW's shoes and said SO PRETTY! Fire shoes! No, don't move the picture!

Too graphic.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Look away then. It's PRETEND flan. Ghosts, goblins and scary schit. Sheesh.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Saturday 10th of October 2015 08:05:47 AM

ed11563 · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Tignanello wrote:
I think maybe we just see the women more as they seem to be the ones carting the kids around. We rarely see the man with a bunch of kids telling us all about his baby-mama-drama . . .
Which is unfair b/c the men being careless enough to make all those different children are not the ones taking care of them and most of them are deadbeats that don't pay their child support, either.

They're not being careless. It's deliberate.