TOTALLY GEEKED!

huskerbb · Guru

RE: Dear Abby: Smoking Relatives

huskerbb · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
My right to breathe beats your right to smoke. What is so hard to understand about that? My breathing doesn't affect you whereas your smoking affects others. Easy peasy, smoke outside and you'll see your grandkids. Smoke inside "for the one day I'm there" and you are the one who made the choice. JMHO
Someone smoking does not affect your breathing for one day.
That is absolutely stupid. It most certainly does for MANY people.
BS. That really is your problem, anyway, not theirs.
My problem - my choice to stay home. If they don't like that, well then, that is THEIR problem.
Again, you'd be beyond pissed if your spouse skipped a family event--and moreover refused to let you take your kids to it. The reasons are irrelevant.
Oh, wow. You so know nothing about me. I would certainly not get upset with my spouse for skipping family events - in fact, he has done it and I didn't get mad. And I've skipped some of his.
Seriously...G doesn't always go with me to family events. And I don't always go to his.

And does he also say that you are forbidden to take the kids even if you want to?

Ohfour · Hooker

huskerbb wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
My right to breathe beats your right to smoke. What is so hard to understand about that? My breathing doesn't affect you whereas your smoking affects others. Easy peasy, smoke outside and you'll see your grandkids. Smoke inside "for the one day I'm there" and you are the one who made the choice. JMHO
Someone smoking does not affect your breathing for one day.
That is absolutely stupid. It most certainly does for MANY people.
BS. That really is your problem, anyway, not theirs.
My problem - my choice to stay home. If they don't like that, well then, that is THEIR problem.
Again, you'd be beyond pissed if your spouse skipped a family event--and moreover refused to let you take your kids to it. The reasons are irrelevant.
Oh, wow. You so know nothing about me. I would certainly not get upset with my spouse for skipping family events - in fact, he has done it and I didn't get mad. And I've skipped some of his.
Seriously...G doesn't always go with me to family events. And I don't always go to his.
And does he also say that you are forbidden to take the kids even if you want to?

If he felt that strongly about it, then no, I would not take the kids. But he is the final decision maker in my household, so he gets the say.

Dona Worry Be Happy · Vette's SS!!

I am sensitive to smoke. It burns my throat and makes my chest hurt and I feel sick for hours after. No way would I put myself or my hypothetical kids through that for a party of any kind.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
My right to breathe beats your right to smoke. What is so hard to understand about that? My breathing doesn't affect you whereas your smoking affects others. Easy peasy, smoke outside and you'll see your grandkids. Smoke inside "for the one day I'm there" and you are the one who made the choice. JMHO
Someone smoking does not affect your breathing for one day.
That is absolutely stupid. It most certainly does for MANY people.
BS. That really is your problem, anyway, not theirs.
My problem - my choice to stay home. If they don't like that, well then, that is THEIR problem.
Again, you'd be beyond pissed if your spouse skipped a family event--and moreover refused to let you take your kids to it. The reasons are irrelevant.
I love how you always know exactly how someone you've never met will react...lol
People are predictable. At their core, most are selfish and want what they want, no matter what anyone and everyone else might think. That's the problem here. The LW wants tomdomwhatbshe wants--to he!! With everyone else.
She wants them to smoke outside for one day so she doesn't get sick. If that's too much to ask of your family then that's a pretty crappy family.
No. It's selfish of the one to ask the many to change. Not the other way around.

The many did change. They changed the venue so they could smoke.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
I am sensitive to smoke. It burns my throat and makes my chest hurt and I feel sick for hours after. No way would I put myself or my hypothetical kids through that for a party of any kind.

Not possible. Must be all in your head. You selfish, ridiculous tyrant. evileye

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
I am sensitive to smoke. It burns my throat and makes my chest hurt and I feel sick for hours after. No way would I put myself or my hypothetical kids through that for a party of any kind.
Not possible. Must be all in your head. You selfish, ridiculous tyrant.

I know, right?

I bet she doesn't even have a boyfriend...

flan

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
My right to breathe beats your right to smoke. What is so hard to understand about that? My breathing doesn't affect you whereas your smoking affects others. Easy peasy, smoke outside and you'll see your grandkids. Smoke inside "for the one day I'm there" and you are the one who made the choice. JMHO
Someone smoking does not affect your breathing for one day.
That is absolutely stupid. It most certainly does for MANY people.
BS. That really is your problem, anyway, not theirs.
My problem - my choice to stay home. If they don't like that, well then, that is THEIR problem.
Again, you'd be beyond pissed if your spouse skipped a family event--and moreover refused to let you take your kids to it. The reasons are irrelevant.
I love how you always know exactly how someone you've never met will react...lol
People are predictable. At their core, most are selfish and want what they want, no matter what anyone and everyone else might think. That's the problem here. The LW wants tomdomwhatbshe wants--to he!! With everyone else.
She wants them to smoke outside for one day so she doesn't get sick. If that's too much to ask of your family then that's a pretty crappy family.
No. It's selfish of the one to ask the many to change. Not the other way around.
The many did change. They changed the venue so they could smoke.

They changed the venue--but you don't know that is the reason. However, even so, the point still stands.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Husker, when the whims of the many AFFECT others - they don't get to control what others choose to do to avoid it.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Husker, when the whims of the many AFFECT others - they don't get to control what others choose to do to avoid it.

It's the one who has the whim here, not the many.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Husker, when the whims of the many AFFECT others - they don't get to control what others choose to do to avoid it.
It's the one who has the whim here, not the many.

Choosing not to breathe in toxic carcinogens and nicotine that make her physically ill is a whim? Uh - ok. hmm

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

husker,

Do you smoke?

flan

huskerbb · Guru

flan327 wrote:
husker,

Do you smoke?

flan

Nope, never have.

Tinydancer · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Husker, when the whims of the many AFFECT others - they don't get to control what others choose to do to avoid it.
It's the one who has the whim here, not the many.

Your "because I said so" arguments get pretty old husker. Second hand smoke has been proven to be harmful. People (especially children) with asthma, older folks with COPD, people who are allergic (again it's been PROVEN that some people are), and just normal people who don't want to smell like an ashtray should be able to avoid it. I think any relative who would not smoke outside for one day of the year is certainly not worried about my feelings so I guess that would be up to me.

huskerbb · Guru

Tinydancer wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Husker, when the whims of the many AFFECT others - they don't get to control what others choose to do to avoid it.
It's the one who has the whim here, not the many.
Your "because I said so" arguments get pretty old husker. Second hand smoke has been proven to be harmful. People (especially children) with asthma, older folks with COPD, people who are allergic (again it's been PROVEN that some people are), and just normal people who don't want to smell like an ashtray should be able to avoid it. I think any relative who would not smoke outside for one day of the year is certainly not worried about my feelings so I guess that would be up to me.

Your ridiculous arguments get old. The LW doesn't even saynthat any of those are issues. The health concern is NOT for most people if you are only talking one day. the health effects demonstrated from second vp hand smoke were caused by YEARS of continuous exposure.

Tinydancer · Guru

She says she gets sick from the smoke but again you think you know better than the LW how she feels. You do realize that's not even a real argument after a while?

huskerbb · Guru

Tinydancer wrote:
She says she gets sick from the smoke but again you think you know better than the LW how she feels. You do realize that's not even a real argument after a while?

That has nothing to do with him taking the kids even if it is true.

Tinydancer · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
She says she gets sick from the smoke but again you think you know better than the LW how she feels. You do realize that's not even a real argument after a while?
That has nothing to do with him taking the kids even if it is true.

You really do think you know better than everyone how they feel. It's like arguing with a wall.

huskerbb · Guru

If you don't like it, then don't do it.

Tinydancer · Guru

Maybe I enjoy arguing with walls. Oh wait. Why don't you just tell me how I feel.

huskerbb · Guru

Then if you enjoy it why are you complaining about it?

Tinydancer · Guru

Comparing your arguing style to like talking to a wall isn't complaining. It's stating an opinion. I know how you hate it when someone has a different one than yours...lol

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Personally, I don't understand smoking. Seems pretty dumb and useless to me.

ed11563 · Guru

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Personally, I don't understand smoking. Seems pretty dumb and useless to me.

Nicotine stimulates pleasure centers in the brain.

And it's more addictive than heroin.

ed11563 · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
She says she gets sick from the smoke but again you think you know better than the LW how she feels. You do realize that's not even a real argument after a while?
That has nothing to do with him taking the kids even if it is true.

Sure it does. It's a very bad idea to deliberately expose your children to an environment that you KNOW makes you sick, and could lead them to develop asthma and nicotine addiction.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

huskerbb wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
She says she gets sick from the smoke but again you think you know better than the LW how she feels. You do realize that's not even a real argument after a while?
That has nothing to do with him taking the kids even if it is true.

Well doctors and scientists agree that there is no safe amount of second hand smoke exposure. They were pressed to come up with an amount of smoke that would be "acceptable" to be exposed to and they could agree that there is ZERO amount of safe second hand smoke. None. Not one breath of it is safe.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

ed11563 · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

That would include ME.

Define "generally" and "alright" please.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

Neither of my parents smoked.

And MANY of those whose parents DID developed respiratory problems.

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

ed11563 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

That would include ME.
Define "generally" and "alright" please.

In general they are alright.

ed11563 · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

That would include ME.
Define "generally" and "alright" please.

In general they are alright.

You didn't even try to answer the question.

Is Asthma alright?

Heart disease?

Breast cancer?

We've survived long enough to make and raise smoke-free children. Is that what you mean?

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

An OPINION is NOT a FACT.

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

ed11563 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
ed11563 wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

That would include ME.
Define "generally" and "alright" please.

In general they are alright.

You didn't even try to answer the question.
Is Asthma alright?
Heart disease?
Breast cancer?

We've survived long enough to make and raise smoke-free children. Is that what you mean?

Yes. All that happens.

In those who did and did not grow up in smoking homes.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

But it happens MORE OFTEN in smoking homes...

flan

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Well there are kids who are neglected and abused who grow up to be happy and healthy and raise happy and healthy children. That doesn't mean we should all neglect and abuse our kids. The logic doesn't stand up.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I'm not defending smoking. I quit cause it was so bad for me and my kids.

All I am saying is being in a house for a couple hours with a smoker isn't going to kill anyone.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

lilyofcourse wrote:
I'm not defending smoking. I quit cause it was so bad for me and my kids.

All I am saying is being in a house for a couple hours with a smoker isn't going to kill anyone.

It might not kill them on the spot, but it does make the OP sick. She feels the effects for a full week after. Why should she have to deal with that?!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

She doesnt. No one does.

But every action has an equal but opposite reaction.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

LMAO

flan

msrock · Guru

I smoke and I have enough respect for my family to smoke outside. I am the only smoker in my house. I would not dream of subjecting my daughter, my SO, his kids, my kids or my Kiddie to my smoke. It's not a big deal to step outside. I do get p!ssed when non smokers try to take away my outside. I can respect closed spaces, but not open air.

NAOW · Vette's SS

lilyofcourse wrote:
I'm not defending smoking. I quit cause it was so bad for me and my kids.

All I am saying is being in a house for a couple hours with a smoker isn't going to kill anyone.

It wouldn't kill my kids to hang out with people who spew profanities for a few hours either, but I still don't want to expose them to that.

Plus, it's not one smoker. It's a party where a lot of people will be indoors smoking. In a house where people smoke indoors full time.

Tinydancer · Guru

msrock wrote:
I smoke and I have enough respect for my family to smoke outside. I am the only smoker in my house. I would not dream of subjecting my daughter, my SO, his kids, my kids or my Kiddie to my smoke. It's not a big deal to step outside. I do get p!ssed when non smokers try to take away my outside. I can respect closed spaces, but not open air.

THIS!!!!! If you have respect for others then you have my respect. If your cigarette is more important then enjoy your lonely old self!

Tinydancer · Guru

NAOW wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I'm not defending smoking. I quit cause it was so bad for me and my kids.

All I am saying is being in a house for a couple hours with a smoker isn't going to kill anyone.
It wouldn't kill my kids to hang out with people who spew profanities for a few hours either, but I still don't want to expose them to that.

Plus, it's not one smoker. It's a party where a lot of people will be indoors smoking. In a house where people smoke indoors full time.

I wouldn't stay away because they smoke in their own home I would only decline if they decided to smoke in the house for the one day I'm there while knowing it makes me sick. I'm not sure why that's so hard to believe.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I can imagine expecting someone not to smoke in their own home when I am there.

I don't understand that line of thinking.

I do understand not going to their because they smoke.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

And I give it about 5 years and we will start hearing about laws that make it illegal to smoke in your own home.

There are laws being pushed now to make it illegal to smoke in your own car.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

This is the stupidest thing you've posted in a long time. Cancer rates are at an all time high. I don't call that "alright".

And for someone on disability before age 45 - you are not "alright". One of the environmental factors that can trigger and worsen RA is smoking.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 18th of October 2015 07:27:24 AM

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

lilyofcourse wrote:
And I give it about 5 years and we will start hearing about laws that make it illegal to smoke in your own home.

There are laws being pushed now to make it illegal to smoke in your own car.

If people would be considerate enough not to smoke around others, it wouldn't be such an issue. Laws get made because it's a problem.

People have the right to smoke so long as it is only affecting them. When their smoke affects me - that right ends.

As for their own home, they can choose to smoke. And I can choose not to go there. The fact that you don't understand this concept is flat out ridiculous.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lawyerlady wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
There is a whole generation that grew up with smoking households.

Generally, they turned out alright.

This is the stupidest thing you've posted in a long time. Cancer rates are at an all time high. I don't call that "alright".

And for someone on disability before age 45 - you are not "alright". One of the environmental factors that can trigger and worsen RA is smoking.

-- Edited by Lawyerlady on Sunday 18th of October 2015 07:27:24 AM

You...stop with the LOGIC... evileye

flan

Southern_Belle · Nothing's Impossible

My sister died from lung cancer at 43. She never smoked but her husband did. Their oldest son had chronic respiratory issues when he was a baby. Probably caused by all that second hand smoke.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Southern_Belle wrote:
My sister died from lung cancer at 43. She never smoked but her husband did. Their oldest son had chronic respiratory issues when he was a baby. Probably caused by all that second hand smoke.

That's so very sad, SB.

flan