Q. Lady Killer: One of my good friends, “Chelsea,” has been dating a seemingly nice guy, “Larry,” for the past six months. They are both in their late 20s and Chelsea is very open about the possibility of settling down and starting a life with Larry. Through a shared acquaintance I recently learned that while Larry was in college he was accused of murdering his roommate. During his trial he was found innocent, but all materials from the case make the verdict seem only as a result of a lack of evidence. Chelsea has never made mention of this and I am not sure she is even aware of Larry’s past. I fear for her safety and think Larry’s murderous history is important for her to know. Is it within my place to inform Chelsea?

A: I do think “I need to tell you that I was acquitted of murdering my college roommate” is an important conversation to have with a beloved. Let’s hope Chelsea knows, has done her own due diligence, and is confident that the verdict was just. But if she doesn’t know, she needs to. Keep in mind, that if you tell her, there could be a “shoot the messenger” problem. But the message has to get to her. If he hasn’t told her, that alone should make her run.