TOTALLY GEEKED!

"It can't be fun to be a host who knows that one guest won't eat some of the offerings" ... This stuck out to me. When I host a party, I don't care if someone doesn't eat one or more of the offerings. I usually don't even notice. If I do notice, I might say something like "I notice you didn't try x, may I ask why" because I want to know if they have an allergy (for example) that I'm unaware of or if they're just a picky eater. I accommodate allergies. I do not accommodate picky eating.

I, too, do not understand picky eaters. I don't know anyone that likes every food out there. I don't like every food out there. But, not liking some foods isn't picky. Picky, to me, is what Husker described - only eating a handful of foods not because of a dislike but because they just haven't tried a food or it looks funny or some other stupid reason. DH used to be a picky eater. He learned quickly that that doesn't fly with me. DS is not a picky eater.

There's not much I won't eat. I'll even try most things once. If it's a food I know don't like, I will often try it anyway because I firmly believe that there exists a preparation in which I will like whatever the food is. Take tomatoes. I hate tomatoes in general but I have had them in ways I like. Sundried tomatoes being one. Love me some sundried tomatoes. My FIL makes a tuna stuffed tomato that I'll try if he ever makes it when we're over there. Sometimes, depending on where I am, I will eat tomatoes if they're on/in a food even though I don't like them. Why? Because I feel it's impolite to sit there picking out bits of tomato and, being an adult, it's not going to kill me to ingest a few bits of a disliked food.

Sometimes, my habit of trying everything at potlucks ends up in me wishing I had asked what it was before I tried it. At one potluck, someone brought parisa. I didn't know what it was and I tried it. It had a familiar texture that I couldn't quite place so I googled it. Turns it's basically ground beef sushi. Turned my stomach but I already had some so I finished what I took. It wasn't bad but I didn't much like it.

huskerbb wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Girlfriend just needs to laugh at her mom. Just say Oh FFS Mom!

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I guess I agree with this.  I don't think escalating the situation is going to do much good.   

 

My son's girlfriend is a VERY picky eater.  Mostly, she hasn't tried a lot of foods.  Her mom never cooked home-cooked meals.  They ate chicken strips, frozen pizzas, hot dogs, etc... pretty much all their life.

We eat processed foods like that rarely, if ever (once in a while we'll throw in a frozen pizza while watching football).

It's a process.  We do try to get her to try new things--and I'd say we're batting about .500 on whether she then likes it.  She will eat a lot more things now than a year ago. 

The only time it's REALLY an issue is when my mom make a good home-cooked meal--meatballs or roast, cheesy or mashed potatoes, a vegetable, and a salad--and she won't eat ANY of it.  It's happening less and less, though, as time goes by. 

-- Edited by huskerbb on Sunday 22nd of November 2015 12:38:18 PM

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My son's SO was raised like that. However, she's adventurous enough to try any new foods.

""Do you like tarama/fresh figs/falafel/rosewater pastry/spanakopita?" 

"I don't know. I never had it."

"Would you like to try it?"

"Sure!"

 

 

My DH doesn't like mac and cheese. You know, the kind from the blue box. I made him "grown up" mac and cheese. With real cheese and bacon bits and peppers and onions. He asks for it all the time. He also doesn't like sweet potatoes. At all. Until I made them for him. He said he didn't know they could be so good. There's tons of food like this he "won't eat" but now does.

huskerbb wrote:

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NAOW wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Girlfriend just needs to laugh at her mom. Just say Oh FFS Mom!

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I guess I agree with this.  I don't think escalating the situation is going to do much good.   

 

My son's girlfriend is a VERY picky eater.  Mostly, she hasn't tried a lot of foods.  Her mom never cooked home-cooked meals.  They ate chicken strips, frozen pizzas, hot dogs, etc... pretty much all their life.

We eat processed foods like that rarely, if ever (once in a while we'll throw in a frozen pizza while watching football).

It's a process.  We do try to get her to try new things--and I'd say we're batting about .500 on whether she then likes it.  She will eat a lot more things now than a year ago. 

The only time it's REALLY an issue is when my mom make a good home-cooked meal--meatballs or roast, cheesy or mashed potatoes, a vegetable, and a salad--and she won't eat ANY of it.  It's happening less and less, though, as time goes by. 

-- Edited by huskerbb on Sunday 22nd of November 2015 12:38:18 PM

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 This drives me nuts. It just seems really immature and impolite to not even make an effort to try something that someone made for you. 

My sister brought a friend to Thanksgiving one year who was like that. She literally put plain mashed potatoes and a roll on her plate. Is it really going to kill you to take a bite of a few things? Have a bite, say something nice, and move on. Saying 'No thank you' to a few dishes passed your way, fine, but I don't think it's polite to say 'no thank you' to a whole meal. 

 

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She's getting better.  We used to put a lot of pressure on here--but now we do ask that she just try things and if she doesn't like it, she doesn't like it. Like I said, I think we are batting about .500.  

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 So you keep score? That girl is brave to even think about becoming your daughter in law.  Do you always try to make everyone do something exactly the way you do? It must be like Stepford people all around.

I think everyone needs to stop interpreting EVERYTHING in life as being all about them. Make your meal. If there is one guest who is a picky eater and wants to eat crackers and drink water, then let him. Who cares? And, nobody should push another adult to try something. Offer it. If they say No Thank You, that should be the end of it. Back off.

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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I think everyone needs to stop interpreting EVERYTHING in life as being all about them. Make your meal. If there is one guest who is a picky eater and wants to eat crackers and drink water, then let him. Who cares? And, nobody should push another adult to try something. Offer it. If they say No Thank You, that should be the end of it. Back off.

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 And you don't get to comment on what I wear either.

flan

Yeah, my boys are definitely NOT picky eaters.

flan

huskerbb wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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NAOW wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Girlfriend just needs to laugh at her mom. Just say Oh FFS Mom!

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I guess I agree with this.  I don't think escalating the situation is going to do much good.   

 

My son's girlfriend is a VERY picky eater.  Mostly, she hasn't tried a lot of foods.  Her mom never cooked home-cooked meals.  They ate chicken strips, frozen pizzas, hot dogs, etc... pretty much all their life.

We eat processed foods like that rarely, if ever (once in a while we'll throw in a frozen pizza while watching football).

It's a process.  We do try to get her to try new things--and I'd say we're batting about .500 on whether she then likes it.  She will eat a lot more things now than a year ago. 

The only time it's REALLY an issue is when my mom make a good home-cooked meal--meatballs or roast, cheesy or mashed potatoes, a vegetable, and a salad--and she won't eat ANY of it.  It's happening less and less, though, as time goes by. 

-- Edited by huskerbb on Sunday 22nd of November 2015 12:38:18 PM

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 This drives me nuts. It just seems really immature and impolite to not even make an effort to try something that someone made for you. 

My sister brought a friend to Thanksgiving one year who was like that. She literally put plain mashed potatoes and a roll on her plate. Is it really going to kill you to take a bite of a few things? Have a bite, say something nice, and move on. Saying 'No thank you' to a few dishes passed your way, fine, but I don't think it's polite to say 'no thank you' to a whole meal. 

 

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She's getting better.  We used to put a lot of pressure on here--but now we do ask that she just try things and if she doesn't like it, she doesn't like it. Like I said, I think we are batting about .500.  

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 So you keep score? That girl is brave to even think about becoming your daughter in law.  Do you always try to make everyone do something exactly the way you do? It must be like Stepford people all around.

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 Oh geez.  I'm just guessing.  chill the fvck out.

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 I'm pretty sure she'd like to tell you all to chill out when you're on her about it all the time...lol

I wasn't talking about him venting but about him trying to bully his sons girlfriend into eating stuff she doesn't want to. Try paying attention if you're going to scold me flan.

Ohfour wrote:

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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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My DH doesn't like mac and cheese. You know, the kind from the blue box. I made him "grown up" mac and cheese. With real cheese and bacon bits and peppers and onions. He asks for it all the time. He also doesn't like sweet potatoes. At all. Until I made them for him. He said he didn't know they could be so good. There's tons of food like this he "won't eat" but now does.

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 OMG THIS!!!!

My SIL would not TOUCH sweet potatoes.  He said he hated them.  No, his mother hated them and had put into his head that HE hated them.  DD made him take a bite one Thanksgiving.  Now every year, he asks me to make him sweet potatoes for his birthday. Just because you don't like something doesn't mean your child won't like it.  Geez...at least let them TRY...and don't fill their head with that crap. 

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 To be honest, I HATED sweet potatoes growing up.  My mom would buy canned ones and then mash them in the syrup.  Then she'd mix brown sugar and a TON of butter in them.  She would put them in a casserole pan, top them with more brown sugar and butter, and then top with marshmellows and bake until the marshmellows were dark brown.  I HATED them.  I make mine like mashed potatoes.  Peel em, boil em, butter, salt, pepper, just a pinch of nutmeg to bring out the flavor, and then I use cream to make them really yummy and smooth.  I've been told using cream brings out the flavor.  Everyone loves my sweet potatoes!

And if you've ever had a really good home made mac and cheese you won't want to open that blue box anymore.  Yuck!

huskerbb wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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I wasn't talking about him venting but about him trying to bully his sons girlfriend into eating stuff she doesn't want to. Try paying attention if you're going to scold me flan.

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 You pay attention.  No one is "bullying" anyone.  That is a flat out stupid thing to say.

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 "She's getting better.  We used to put a lot of pressure on here--but now we do ask that she just try things and if she doesn't like it, she doesn't like it. Like I said, I think we are batting about .500."

 

You said "We used to put lot's of pressure on her". That is what bullies do. Good luck squirming out of that one...lol

huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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Why would you have done it in the past? There's no reason to put pressure on anyone to eat what you eat.  It's rude and it's bullying.

huskerbb wrote:

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weltschmerz wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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Why would you have done it in the past? There's no reason to put pressure on anyone to eat what you eat.  It's rude and it's bullying.

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 It's frustrating trying to make meals for someone who won't try anything.  

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 It's frustrating when someone tries to tell you they know better than you what you'd like. You bullied her, whether it was then or now it's bullying.

huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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 She hates you. Pathetic, really.

flan

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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 She hates you. Pathetic, really.

flan

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 Another case of the little dog nipping at the big dog's heels. 

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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 She hates you. Pathetic, really.

flan

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 You butting in every time I disagree with someone is what's pathetic. Then you'll keep saying how you ignore me like you're some special person or something. But out...

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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 She hates you. Pathetic, really.

flan

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 Another case of the little dog nipping at the big dog's heels. 

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flan

p.s. Frankly, it's an insult to dogs to call her one...

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 Your avatar insults pigs but it doesn't stop you. Did husker call you in for back up?

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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Ohfour wrote:

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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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My DH doesn't like mac and cheese. You know, the kind from the blue box. I made him "grown up" mac and cheese. With real cheese and bacon bits and peppers and onions. He asks for it all the time. He also doesn't like sweet potatoes. At all. Until I made them for him. He said he didn't know they could be so good. There's tons of food like this he "won't eat" but now does.

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 OMG THIS!!!!

My SIL would not TOUCH sweet potatoes.  He said he hated them.  No, his mother hated them and had put into his head that HE hated them.  DD made him take a bite one Thanksgiving.  Now every year, he asks me to make him sweet potatoes for his birthday. Just because you don't like something doesn't mean your child won't like it.  Geez...at least let them TRY...and don't fill their head with that crap. 

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 To be honest, I HATED sweet potatoes growing up.  My mom would buy canned ones and then mash them in the syrup.  Then she'd mix brown sugar and a TON of butter in them.  She would put them in a casserole pan, top them with more brown sugar and butter, and then top with marshmellows and bake until the marshmellows were dark brown.  I HATED them.  I make mine like mashed potatoes.  Peel em, boil em, butter, salt, pepper, just a pinch of nutmeg to bring out the flavor, and then I use cream to make them really yummy and smooth.  I've been told using cream brings out the flavor.  Everyone loves my sweet potatoes!

And if you've ever had a really good home made mac and cheese you won't want to open that blue box anymore.  Yuck!

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 I want your sweet potatoes!

The bolded. Please tell DH this. Smack some sense into him. He loves that Kraft crap. I think it's foul. He likes his mac and cheese dry aka follow the Kraft directions to the t and he's happy. I'd rather have homemade. Or Stouffer's. I love that stuff. Guilty pleasure.

He said they put pressure on her, not that they just asked her. Two diffrent things in my opinion.

huskerbb wrote:

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flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Yeah, I said "used to", meaning that is in the past. YOu don't seem to know what simple words even mean.

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 She hates you. Pathetic, really.

flan

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 Another case of the little dog nipping at the big dog's heels. 

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Rabid pit bulls are big dogs.  Kind of like that? 

Tinydancer wrote:

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He said they put pressure on her, not that they just asked her. Two diffrent things in my opinion.

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 And I don't blame him for putting pressure on her. He said she's liked at least some of what she's tried. Nothing wrong with expanding her palate. It's silly to go through life with a limited palate just because you (general) don't want to try new foods. Not to mention unhealthy as I doubt such limited eating allows for a healthy, nutritive diet.

Also, maybe she pulls crap like my DH does. He loves Kraft mac and cheese. If it's not Kraft, he automatically hates it without ever trying it. Everyone could raving about a homemade mac and cheese and he will sit there griping about it and saying how much he hates it. Not because it isn't good but because it isn't Kraft. But here's the thing. If you call that homemade mac and cheese something else - say, cheesy noodles - he will be all over it scarfing it down and raving about how awesome it is. He's even admitted to doing this. One of our friends makes a killer mac and cheese and calls it Italian Cheesy Mac just so DH will eat it. DH loves it but will admit that he wouldn't eat if our friend called it mac and cheese.

chef wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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He said they put pressure on her, not that they just asked her. Two diffrent things in my opinion.

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 And I don't blame him for putting pressure on her. He said she's liked at least some of what she's tried. Nothing wrong with expanding her palate. It's silly to go through life with a limited palate just because you (general) don't want to try new foods. Not to mention unhealthy as I doubt such limited eating allows for a healthy, nutritive diet.

Also, maybe she pulls crap like my DH does. He loves Kraft mac and cheese. If it's not Kraft, he automatically hates it without ever trying it. Everyone could raving about a homemade mac and cheese and he will sit there griping about it and saying how much he hates it. Not because it isn't good but because it isn't Kraft. But here's the thing. If you call that homemade mac and cheese something else - say, cheesy noodles - he will be all over it scarfing it down and raving about how awesome it is. He's even admitted to doing this. One of our friends makes a killer mac and cheese and calls it Italian Cheesy Mac just so DH will eat it. DH loves it but will admit that he wouldn't eat if our friend called it mac and cheese.

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 And that is just flat stupid. Why any adult would behave that way is beyond me. 

huskerbb wrote:

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Heck, how do I know I like something I've never tried?

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Who cares? You don't get to decide that for someone else. There are foods I want to try and foods I don't want to try. An adult can make their own decision.

I didn't "fell."

flan