TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Dear Miss Manners: In Laws Use Childhood Nickname

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I read this and thought: "Whoa! That's silly."

But then it hit me...DS1 is a "third." Growing up, we called him "A," which is his middle name. By high school, he had switched to "L," his first name. To us, he's still "A."

I don't think it bothers him.

flan

ed11563 · Guru

The way to get people to stop calling you something you don't like, is to completely stop responding to it.

One might not want to do that with elderly grandparents though.

burns07 · Guru

why would you care what your FORMER in-laws call anyone?

ed11563 · Guru

I knew a girl whose mother always called her "Stinky".

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

burns07 wrote:

why would you care what your FORMER in-laws call anyone?

Because they are her grandparents...

flan

Tinydancer · Guru

Why is the mom even involved? The daughter is a grownup and should be able to talk to them about it if it bothers her. Just once I'd like to see an adult act like one when they're writing for advice.

Ohfour · Hooker

I know quite a few people whose friends and co-workers call them by a different name than their family. My ExH being one. None of them have a problem with it. It's a non issue...

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

She's 30. Let her figure it out with her grandparents herself. Wow.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

She needs to get over it. It is her name and they are her grandparents. Her name could be a family name and her deciding to change it may be an insult to them or maybe dad chose her first and this change coincided with the divorce and the grandparents cling to the name as they lost some of their relationship with her? There could be lots of reasons they do this.

Lindley · Guru

It is her grandparents, Why get so upset at elderly grandparents calling their grandchild by a name they called her all of her life? My son didn't like being called a childs version of his name kind of like jimmy. He never corrected my mom or dad or his other grandparents when they refered him by that name. He answered and that was that and he was only 13.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I have a 60 year old aunt that everyone still calls "babe".

She also used a completely different name for me my whole life. No one cares.

I have a whole side of the family that calls me Lily cousin. I don't mind a bit. I like it. The one who started it now has 3 kids of her own, and yes, they call me that too.

Aaron has been Aaron since before he was born to us. But he goes by his first name in high school.

The OP is exactly why we have grown up who can't function.

It's no big deal. Unless it was a mean name, let it go.

Be thankful your daughter has a relationship with that side of the family. There are plenty who never have that.

Bonny22Pye · Guru

I go by my nickname at work. Its a shortened version of my maiden last name. People have called me that for years professionally. Most of my family calls by my real first name. I answer to both and really could care less.

Ohfour · Hooker

lilyofcourse wrote:
I have a 60 year old aunt that everyone still calls "babe".

She also used a completely different name for me my whole life. No one cares.

I have a whole side of the family that calls me Lily cousin. I don't mind a bit. I like it. The one who started it now has 3 kids of her own, and yes, they call me that too.

Aaron has been Aaron since before he was born to us. But he goes by his first name in high school.

The OP is exactly why we have grown up who can't function.

It's no big deal. Unless it was a mean name, let it go.

Be thankful your daughter has a relationship with that side of the family. There are plenty who never have that.

I had a great aunt that we all called Babe. G's mother also was called Babe by her family...

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Ohfour wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I have a 60 year old aunt that everyone still calls "babe".

She also used a completely different name for me my whole life. No one cares.

I have a whole side of the family that calls me Lily cousin. I don't mind a bit. I like it. The one who started it now has 3 kids of her own, and yes, they call me that too.

Aaron has been Aaron since before he was born to us. But he goes by his first name in high school.

The OP is exactly why we have grown up who can't function.

It's no big deal. Unless it was a mean name, let it go.

Be thankful your daughter has a relationship with that side of the family. There are plenty who never have that.
I had a great aunt that we all called Babe. G's mother also was called Babe by her family...

We're they the youngest of their siblings too?

FNW · Guru

This is an issue she should have addressed when her daughter was a child, not later when she is an adult. If it bothers her, she can speak up.

Personally, my name/nickname has changed over the years. I really don't care what someone calls me as long as it's not derogatory.

chef · Guru

Eh. People rarely get my name correct. I don't care. My name is often perceived as a nickname so I will get called the longer version of it. My parents chose a less common spelling so I usually end up having to spell it for people. Frankly, I don't care how people spell it or what I'm called as long as it's correct when it matters (like on my taxes). If it's a situation where it truly doesn't matter (like giving my name at Starbucks), I don't bother correcting it. "Name? Kelly. Kathy? Yep."

DS is the fourth. His great-grandpa, grandpa, and dad all have different nicknames. DS' great-grandma calls him by his great-grandpa's nickname. MIL and I both call our husbands by the same nickname. They know who is being spoken to depending on which woman says their name. MIL has a different nickname for my DH. FIL calls DS by his given name with 'little' in front of it. DH used to be 'little' FirstName but that got passed down. The only time there's confusion is when someone says their given first name and three heads will turn.

Lindley · Guru

I had a little nickname for my great nephew. He loved it and always giggled when I called him by that name. The other day he informed me that he was to old to be called by that name and he is in kindergarten. I quit calling him by that name. He was so cute about it.

Ohfour · Hooker

lilyofcourse wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I have a 60 year old aunt that everyone still calls "babe".

She also used a completely different name for me my whole life. No one cares.

I have a whole side of the family that calls me Lily cousin. I don't mind a bit. I like it. The one who started it now has 3 kids of her own, and yes, they call me that too.

Aaron has been Aaron since before he was born to us. But he goes by his first name in high school.

The OP is exactly why we have grown up who can't function.

It's no big deal. Unless it was a mean name, let it go.

Be thankful your daughter has a relationship with that side of the family. There are plenty who never have that.
I had a great aunt that we all called Babe. G's mother also was called Babe by her family...
We're they the youngest of their siblings too?

Great Aunt was by FAR the youngest (accident baby, 15 years younger than her next oldest sibling). MIL was an only child...

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Ohfour wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I have a 60 year old aunt that everyone still calls "babe".

She also used a completely different name for me my whole life. No one cares.

I have a whole side of the family that calls me Lily cousin. I don't mind a bit. I like it. The one who started it now has 3 kids of her own, and yes, they call me that too.

Aaron has been Aaron since before he was born to us. But he goes by his first name in high school.

The OP is exactly why we have grown up who can't function.

It's no big deal. Unless it was a mean name, let it go.

Be thankful your daughter has a relationship with that side of the family. There are plenty who never have that.
I had a great aunt that we all called Babe. G's mother also was called Babe by her family...
We're they the youngest of their siblings too?
Great Aunt was by FAR the youngest (accident baby, 15 years younger than her next oldest sibling). MIL was an only child...

Yep. Seems the norm doesn't it?

huskerbb · Guru

I used to have the nickname "boomy or boomer". Only one person, a high school classmate of my dads, even calls me that, anymore. I think it's kind of neat in a way that he remembers that. It's not like I see the guy more than a couple of times a year.

Ilumine · Regular

First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.

huskerbb · Guru

You'd rather be called worm than kimmy? That's fvcked up.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

One of my sons goes by his initials. His first name is his dads and his middle is my dads. To lessen confusion he went by initials. Example JT. Later on he had friends call him by his name. Didn't bother anyone.

Two of my sisters have legally changed their names because they don't like what my mom named them. I just can't imagine doing that.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I saw a reporter on ESPN whose first name was "Booger."

Really? A grown-azz man???

flan

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

DN works in billing at one of the local hospitals. She has come across some really interesting names. The other day a boy named Majacikal. We had that Amber Alert on that little girl name Twinkle Twinkie Twilight. And Unique. We have a cashier here named Unique. She's really nice.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.

Well. My name is Tammy.

Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.

Never really thought about it being a childish name.

It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.

Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

TrudyML · Guru

I call my sister her kid nick name. Her little ones die laughing. It's all in good fun.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

TrudyML wrote:
I call my sister her kid nick name. Her little ones die laughing. It's all in good fun.

And that's the important thing.

If it's NOT all in good fun, then family should respect your wishes.

flan

TrudyML · Guru

My father gave my brother a shirt when he was young that said,'Good Boy' on it.

His nickname is Good or Goodie. He is still called it.

Ohfour · Hooker

flan327 wrote:
I saw a reporter on ESPN whose first name was "Booger."

Really? A grown-azz man???

flan

I think you mean Boomer... wink

Boomer Esiason

Ohfour · Hooker

Lord, G calls EVERBODY by a shortened name. Lisa is Lis. Shirley is Shirl. Mary is Mar.

But I've been around the people he grew up with and they all do it...

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
I saw a reporter on ESPN whose first name was "Booger."

Really? A grown-azz man???

flan
I think you mean Boomer...
Boomer Esiason

Nope, I know who Boomer is. This guy was Black.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

His name is Anthony "Booger" McFarland. He played for LSU.

flan

Ohfour · Hooker

flan327 wrote:
His name is Anthony "Booger" McFarland. He played for LSU.

flan

Yes yes yesyes yes...

I didn't know he was a commentator now...

My personal favorite is Ha-Ha Clinton-Dix. He played for the Tide. He's with Green Bay now...

Ilumine · Regular

huskerbb wrote:
You'd rather be called worm than kimmy? That's fvcked up.

Yes I would. I would rather my family nickname (i.e. what my FAMILY calls me when we are together) have MEANING vs the family nickname be something infantizing. Having my aunts and grandmother remember me as an early and prolific reader vs the baby they changed diapers for, you know at the ripe old age of 45.

Now, I would not have friends, coworker or acquaintances use anything other than Kimberly. But it is much easier enforcing that, then it is with family.

Ilumine · Regular

lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?

People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.

As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.

My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ilumine wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
You'd rather be called worm than kimmy? That's fvcked up.
Yes I would. I would rather my family nickname (i.e. what my FAMILY calls me when we are together) have MEANING vs the family nickname be something infantizing. Having my aunts and grandmother remember me as an early and prolific reader vs the baby they changed diapers for, you know at the ripe old age of 45.
Now, I would not have friends, coworker or acquaintances use anything other than Kimberly. But it is much easier enforcing that, then it is with family.

I think the story behind the nickname is sweet!

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Ilumine wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?
People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.
As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.
My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.

Geez. It must be hard being that insecure.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ilumine wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?
People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.
As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.
My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.

Yes, and make sure you eat everything at a family gathering, even if it makes you sick.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?
People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.
As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.
My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.
Geez. It must be hard being that insecure.

So many responses...and all of them so wrong...

flan

huskerbb · Guru

lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?
People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.
As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.
My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.
Geez. It must be hard being that insecure.

Exactly.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Ilumine wrote:
First, I think that he LW was going to MM because she and her daughter HAVE tried a number of options, short of cutting her paternal family out and was hoping that either:

a) MM would have that magical phrase that caused the paternal family to "see the light" or
b) the paternal family would read MM's column and again "see the light"

It is hard putting family on time outs for something that many (as witnessed by the replies here) find to be inconsequential.

The problem is, nicknames shorted from longer names like Kimmy, or Tommy or Shelly or Matty are childish, hence the point of using them with babies, toddler and preteens. Its cute.

But once someone grows up, they grow out of the cute and childish. Unfortunately, FAMILY can have a hard time seeing their children, nieces/nephews and grandchildren as adults. It can be very telling (relationship wise) how the family member reacts when asked to use the full or adult name.

My name is Kimberly. My family calls me Kimmy or Kim. I loath both, the first because its an infantizing version of my name and the second because it is a masculine name. And I politely asked my family to use Kimberly when addressing me, especially in public. And I had to put a couple people on time out to get there.

HOWEVER, I have no problem with nicknames that are not derivatives of my full name. Calling me Worm because I was a book worm is tied to a wonderful story, calling me Kimmy is tied to when I was a child.
Well. My name is Tammy.
Sometimes people shorten it to Tam.
Never really thought about it being a childish name.
It is silly, in my opinion, to get so caught up in what family calls you.
Be thankful you have someone still there to call you that name.

So I should accept people calling me something I do not like just because they are alive? I guess using that reasoning, we should excuse Granny for ignoring your parenting wishes or your Aunt and Uncle for stealing your property because they are still in your life?
People, for the most part don't get to choose their names, it is chosen for them. (i.e., Twinkle Twinkle). At the very least, we can choose the version of our given name.
As for Tammy, it is not "Y" that makes it childish, it is taking a full given name and shortening it to make it EASIER for the baby to hear. A baby is going to respond to Kimberly or Elizabeth or Michael just fine. The intent behind the name is what matters.
My family's (god love them all) only call me Kimmy when they are trying to assert dominance, for no better word. It comes up when extended family decisions are being made.
Geez. It must be hard being that insecure.

Exactly.

Oh, FFS...Really?

flan

Ohfour · Hooker

Really. I have never known ANYONE that gets upset because their family uses the names they've always been called. We have always called my sister Ninnie (her name is Jennie). The entire family calls her that. Its an endearment. Only insecure people make a deal out of it...

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
Really. I have never known ANYONE that gets upset because their family uses the names they've always been called. We have always called my sister Ninnie (her name is Jennie). The entire family calls her that. Its an endearment. Only insecure people make a deal out of it...

Does she LIKE it?

If so, fine. If not, WHY do you do it?

flan

Ohfour · Hooker

Dont know...its what shes always been called. We arent about to change. Thats her name.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I think a person has the right to be called the name they choose.

Maybe your name is Elizabeth & your older brother called you "Betsy Wetsy" as a child. As an adult, would you still expect to be called that?

flan

Ohfour · Hooker

Wouldn't care. Its a term of endearment.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
Wouldn't care. Its a term of endearment.

Nope, it's teasing & not in a nice way.

flan

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I don't think anyone is really talking about something derogatory.

The OP is about a diminutive of a name.

Not something bad.

Really.

Of all the things in the world to worry about.

A shortened version of your name is not in the top 2 million.

To be that insecure is just sad and pitiful.