TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

RE: Whats your opinion on this?

NAOW · Vette's SS

You wouldn't know the baby was dead unless you were told. They look like a sleeping baby.

Ohfour · Hooker

NAOW wrote:
You wouldn't know the baby was dead unless you were told. They look like a sleeping baby.

Exactly. "This is my brother that died". What's so wrong with that?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

So you want him to bring the photos but not tell the class he's dead?

Ohfour · Hooker

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
So you want him to bring the photos but not tell the class he's dead?

Like I said...he can say, this is my brother that died...

Empyreal · Senior Member

I don't know what to think about it really.

On one hand, I think it's good for kids to know these things and gain experiences like this early in life so that they have an understanding and awareness.

On the other hand, I once had a co-worker who said that her sister had her baby last week and that's why she (my co-worker) had missed a few days of work. Then she pulled out a picture and showed me the little baby and said, "She died after just an hour after birth, here's my sister holding her for the last time"

I burst into tears. It was so insanely sad, I couldn't control myself. I sort of resented that she put me on the spot like that.. I didn't want to cry in front of my co-workers like that and then have 5 people trying to console me was terribly embarrassing.

So this one goes both ways for me. I don't know..

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

You are an adult. These are 7 yr olds.

Empyreal · Senior Member

I know.

I was just thinking, gee, if it hit me that hard, could it also disturb a little kid to that point? Or did I react that way because I had never seen it before?

Like I said, I don't know how to feel about it. I'm totes conflicted!

Ohfour · Hooker

weltschmerz wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I guess none of you ever have the news on when your kids are in the room.

Never watch a movie or tv show above a G rating when the kids are in the room.

You can't completely shield kids from death.

I don't understand how one is not a big deal but the other is completely wrong.
That's different. It's pretend.
Even when they show dead bodies on the news, they give a warning that content may be disturbing to some viewers.
Viewers who are adults.
People have the choice to watch or nor. These little kids didn't have a choice. They had a picture of a dead body forced on them, and it's wrong.

This picture has been all over the media...television, internet sites...I've seen it numerous times...

They may do that where you live, but not here...

(I won't post it because some people obviously have issues, but it's a picture of the dead shooter in the street, with his head blown off laying in a pool of blood)

Empyreal · Senior Member

It might be a healthy thing for kids to experience it. It might be deeply disturbing.

I'm not a psychologist.

The people that work at the school are professionals when it comes to children. It's what they are paid to do.

I'm wondering if they chose to not allow the picture for fear of backlash from parents, or if they truly felt it was a bad thing to expose the children to?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Death is part of life. There is no point in shielding kids from that. Some of them learn it very early the hard way, like this young boy that lost his sibling. Some will get to learn a degree removed, like his classmates. Which would you prefer your child to be?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

That is not your choice to make for other parents.

Ohfour · Hooker

So what about the kid whose mother died last year? When he does his thing, does he get to say "this was my mother, she died". No one can talk about death?

Empyreal · Senior Member

Lawyerlady wrote:
Death is part of life. There is no point in shielding kids from that. Some of them learn it very early the hard way, like this young boy that lost his sibling. Some will get to learn a degree removed, like his classmates. Which would you prefer your child to be?

That's a good point.

I'm thinking they didn't allow the picture because inevitably there is going to be a lot of questions from a class full of kids.

So is he in heaven now? How come he died? Does he get to see my grandma because she's there too?

It's not really the place of a teacher to be answering those things because everybody believes differently.

Total speculation here. It is an interesting topic though!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

You keep dancing around the real issue which is about photos of a corpse. That is the issue.

Ohfour · Hooker

Empyreal wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Death is part of life. There is no point in shielding kids from that. Some of them learn it very early the hard way, like this young boy that lost his sibling. Some will get to learn a degree removed, like his classmates. Which would you prefer your child to be?
That's a good point.
I'm thinking they didn't allow the picture because inevitably there is going to be a lot of questions from a class full of kids.
So is he in heaven now? How come he died? Does he get to see my grandma because she's there too?
It's not really the place of a teacher to be answering those things because everybody believes differently.
Total speculation here. It is an interesting topic though!

Which brings me back to the question. Should the kids whose mom died of cancer last year not be allowed to bring pictures of her?

Ohfour · Hooker

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
You keep dancing around the real issue which is about photos of a corpse. That is the issue.

No it's not. You keep talking about how only the parents should be able to introduce their kids to death. That's ridiculous...

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Photos of her corpse? Is that your question?

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

IMHO, shielding kids from deep life questions is stupid. Life happens, so does death.

Kids ARE going to ask questions in and out of school. Teachers and parents need to deal with those facts.

Stop being wimps. Be compassionate and answer the questions to the best of your ability.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

There is a big difference between discussing death and showing photos of corpses to 7 yr olds. If you all want to dance around this and pretend this is about something else, then knock yourselves out.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
They weren't showing pictures of dead babies.
Maybe none of their families had suffered a loss either.
Some undoubtedly had, but you don't gather around the casket of a dead relative to take a picture.
This isn't a casket.
Try harder.
LOL!
um, they put dead people in caskets. But have it your way. are you going to go get a family picture with your dead relative BEFORE they put them in the casket?
if you have one of those, why haven't I seen it?

-- Edited by huskerbb on Friday 4th of December 2015 10:35:26 AM
I don't share by choice.
DS has pictures of his birthmother's six month old sister, should I share those?
No, they are his pictures to share, not mine.
You really have no understanding of the grief process for infant loss.
That's EXACTLY the frickin point. They are not to share except with very close friends and family--if even then. Certainly not random strangers.
The class is not full of "random" strangers. It was a class project! School is a place to learn, is death not a part of learning?

Czech, I'm just catching up, but, as a parent I am the ONLY one who gets to decide how & when my kids learn about sensitive subjects.

flan

just Czech · Give Me Grand's!

flan327 wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
They weren't showing pictures of dead babies.
Maybe none of their families had suffered a loss either.
Some undoubtedly had, but you don't gather around the casket of a dead relative to take a picture.
This isn't a casket.
Try harder.
LOL!
um, they put dead people in caskets. But have it your way. are you going to go get a family picture with your dead relative BEFORE they put them in the casket?
if you have one of those, why haven't I seen it?

-- Edited by huskerbb on Friday 4th of December 2015 10:35:26 AM
I don't share by choice.
DS has pictures of his birthmother's six month old sister, should I share those?
No, they are his pictures to share, not mine.
You really have no understanding of the grief process for infant loss.
That's EXACTLY the frickin point. They are not to share except with very close friends and family--if even then. Certainly not random strangers.
The class is not full of "random" strangers. It was a class project! School is a place to learn, is death not a part of learning?
Czech, I'm just catching up, but, as a parent I am the ONLY one who gets to decide how & when my kids learn about sensitive subjects.
flan

IMHO, death is not a sensitive subject any more than life is a sensitive subject. They are facts.

weltschmerz · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
weltschmerz wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I guess none of you ever have the news on when your kids are in the room.

Never watch a movie or tv show above a G rating when the kids are in the room.

You can't completely shield kids from death.

I don't understand how one is not a big deal but the other is completely wrong.
That's different. It's pretend.
Even when they show dead bodies on the news, they give a warning that content may be disturbing to some viewers.
Viewers who are adults.
People have the choice to watch or nor. These little kids didn't have a choice. They had a picture of a dead body forced on them, and it's wrong.
This picture has been all over the media...television, internet sites...I've seen it numerous times...
They may do that where you live, but not here...
(I won't post it because some people obviously have issues, but it's a picture of the dead shooter in the street, with his head blown off laying in a pool of blood)

No, not where I live. Cable TV out of the USA

They won't show a drop of blood on the news, never mind a corpse, without giving people plently of warning.

And since you won't post it because some people "obviously have issues" then certainly some kids will have issues.

-- Edited by weltschmerz on Friday 4th of December 2015 06:14:38 PM

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Welts and I agree. Shouldn't that be enough to give you all pause?

Ohfour · Hooker

flan327 wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
They weren't showing pictures of dead babies.
Maybe none of their families had suffered a loss either.
Some undoubtedly had, but you don't gather around the casket of a dead relative to take a picture.
This isn't a casket.
Try harder.
LOL!
um, they put dead people in caskets. But have it your way. are you going to go get a family picture with your dead relative BEFORE they put them in the casket?
if you have one of those, why haven't I seen it?

-- Edited by huskerbb on Friday 4th of December 2015 10:35:26 AM
I don't share by choice.
DS has pictures of his birthmother's six month old sister, should I share those?
No, they are his pictures to share, not mine.
You really have no understanding of the grief process for infant loss.
That's EXACTLY the frickin point. They are not to share except with very close friends and family--if even then. Certainly not random strangers.
The class is not full of "random" strangers. It was a class project! School is a place to learn, is death not a part of learning?
Czech, I'm just catching up, but, as a parent I am the ONLY one who gets to decide how & when my kids learn about sensitive subjects.
flan

So the little kid whose mom is dead shouldnt be able to talk about her becaus you dont like it? Bullschitt...

Ohfour · Hooker

weltschmerz wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
weltschmerz wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I guess none of you ever have the news on when your kids are in the room.

Never watch a movie or tv show above a G rating when the kids are in the room.

You can't completely shield kids from death.

I don't understand how one is not a big deal but the other is completely wrong.
That's different. It's pretend.
Even when they show dead bodies on the news, they give a warning that content may be disturbing to some viewers.
Viewers who are adults.
People have the choice to watch or nor. These little kids didn't have a choice. They had a picture of a dead body forced on them, and it's wrong.
This picture has been all over the media...television, internet sites...I've seen it numerous times...
They may do that where you live, but not here...
(I won't post it because some people obviously have issues, but it's a picture of the dead shooter in the street, with his head blown off laying in a pool of blood)
No, not where I live. Cable TV out of the USA
They won't show a drop of blood on the news, never mind a corpse, without giving people plently of warning.
And since you won't post it because some people "obviously have issues" then certainly some kids will have issues.

-- Edited by weltschmerz on Friday 4th of December 2015 06:14:38 PM

The people that have issues with the picture are a bunch of pansy whiny babies who have yet to grow the fvck up.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
I have no problem with taking pictures of stillborn babies, or displaying them in their home or even on facebook. But that is different than bringing them into a school.
Why is it wrong?

If you don't understand, no one can explain it to you.

They are MY minor children. MINE.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Ohfour wrote:
weltschmerz wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
weltschmerz wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
I guess none of you ever have the news on when your kids are in the room.

Never watch a movie or tv show above a G rating when the kids are in the room.

You can't completely shield kids from death.

I don't understand how one is not a big deal but the other is completely wrong.
That's different. It's pretend.
Even when they show dead bodies on the news, they give a warning that content may be disturbing to some viewers.
Viewers who are adults.
People have the choice to watch or nor. These little kids didn't have a choice. They had a picture of a dead body forced on them, and it's wrong.
This picture has been all over the media...television, internet sites...I've seen it numerous times...
They may do that where you live, but not here...
(I won't post it because some people obviously have issues, but it's a picture of the dead shooter in the street, with his head blown off laying in a pool of blood)
No, not where I live. Cable TV out of the USA
They won't show a drop of blood on the news, never mind a corpse, without giving people plently of warning.
And since you won't post it because some people "obviously have issues" then certainly some kids will have issues.

-- Edited by weltschmerz on Friday 4th of December 2015 06:14:38 PM
The people that have issues with the picture are a bunch of pansy whiny babies who have yet to grow the fvck up.

MY BOYS LOST THEIR FATHER WHEN THEY WERE 5 YEARS OLD and 18 MONTHS.

Drink some more...

flan

Ohfour · Hooker

flan327 wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:
I have no problem with taking pictures of stillborn babies, or displaying them in their home or even on facebook. But that is different than bringing them into a school.
Why is it wrong?
If you don't understand, no one can explain it to you.
They are MY minor children. MINE.
flan

You havent answered my question...should your boys not have been able to talk about their father because someone like you didnt want them too? Nice...

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

flan327 wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
just Czech wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
They weren't showing pictures of dead babies.
Maybe none of their families had suffered a loss either.
Some undoubtedly had, but you don't gather around the casket of a dead relative to take a picture.
This isn't a casket.
Try harder.
LOL!
um, they put dead people in caskets. But have it your way. are you going to go get a family picture with your dead relative BEFORE they put them in the casket?
if you have one of those, why haven't I seen it?

-- Edited by huskerbb on Friday 4th of December 2015 10:35:26 AM
I don't share by choice.
DS has pictures of his birthmother's six month old sister, should I share those?
No, they are his pictures to share, not mine.
You really have no understanding of the grief process for infant loss.
That's EXACTLY the frickin point. They are not to share except with very close friends and family--if even then. Certainly not random strangers.
The class is not full of "random" strangers. It was a class project! School is a place to learn, is death not a part of learning?
Czech, I'm just catching up, but, as a parent I am the ONLY one who gets to decide how & when my kids learn about sensitive subjects.
flan

Really, like elementary students being forced to deal with transgender issues that don't concern them?

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
That is not your choice to make for other parents.

Nor is the opposite a choice the parents get to make for that kid. He has the right to talk about his dead sibling and include the family photos in a project about his family.

Ohfour · Hooker

Flan? Please answer my question...

weltschmerz · Guru

NAOW wrote:
You wouldn't know the baby was dead unless you were told. They look like a sleeping baby.

No, it was a preemie and didn't look "finished".

Ohfour · Hooker

weltschmerz wrote:
NAOW wrote:
You wouldn't know the baby was dead unless you were told. They look like a sleeping baby.
No, it was a preemie and didn't look "finished".

He wasnt a preemie.

weltschmerz · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
weltschmerz wrote:
NAOW wrote:
You wouldn't know the baby was dead unless you were told. They look like a sleeping baby.
No, it was a preemie and didn't look "finished".
He wasnt a preemie.

Wrong again. Read the article.

Ohfour · Hooker

Both of my kids were born at 36 weeks. They were not considered preemies. We went home 2 days after they were born...

weltschmerz · Guru

Ohfour wrote:
Both of my kids were born at 36 weeks. They were not considered preemies. We went home 2 days after they were born...

The kid needed another month in the oven to cook, and he looks it.

Ohfour · Hooker

He started dying long before he actually did. No amount of "baking" could have saved him...

weltschmerz · Guru

Although pregnancy is generally 40 weeks long, babies born at 37 weeks are considered full-term (at that point, they're developed enough that they shouldn't have any age-related health issues). Any child born 36 weeks or earlier is considered a preemie

http://www.parents.com/advice/pregnancy-birth/giving-birth/when-is-a-baby-officially-considered-premature/

Ta Da!!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

That baby was beautiful.

There is nothing disturbing about those pictures.

I don't know why anyone would have trouble with those pictures.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Who cares why? Well then dont complain when other issues are rammed down your kids throats.

msrock · Guru

I just know how traumatized my daughter was in 2nd grade when other kids in her class told her there was no such thing as Santa Claus. OMG! She was devastated! She was beside herself! I can't even imagine how she would react to seeing this pic, but the risk is too high. The teacher had a decision to make and I believe she made the right one. It probably broke her heart to make it, because she had to let someone else down. But she did the right thing. It could have been bad if she decided the other way. I believe the photo is fine in other scenario's. Just not this one.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Who cares why? Well then dont complain when other issues are rammed down your kids throats.

You are comparing apples to cows. That's how far apart this is from Transgender or religion even.

Death is a fact of life.

They learn about it in the Lion King, Little Mermaid, Up and just about every cartoon out there.

To me, I see a boy who faced a tragic event with his family and they moved forward as a family.

We talk about raising well adjusted kids, resilient kids. But when it is actually in front of the class, it's another story.

The baby is not deformed or grotesque.

It just looks like a sleeping baby in his mother's arms.

If the other people in that picture didn't look sad and you didn't know the baby was dead, well, you wouldn't know. You wouldn't think anything about it.

Ohfour · Hooker

msrock wrote:
I just know how traumatized my daughter was in 2nd grade when other kids in her class told her there was no such thing as Santa Claus. OMG! She was devastated! She was beside herself! I can't even imagine how she would react to seeing this pic, but the risk is too high. The teacher had a decision to make and I believe she made the right one. It probably broke her heart to make it, because she had to let someone else down. But she did the right thing. It could have been bad if she decided the other way. I believe the photo is fine in other scenario's. Just not this one.

What about a mother that had died a couple of months ago?

Ohfour · Hooker

Why will NO ONE answer my question?????

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Because they cant.

Empyreal · Senior Member

If the kid brought a picture of his deceased mother I would say it is def. morbid and he should have to put the picture away. The baby thing is a little different because that's likely the only picture they have of the little boy.

I don't think you are asking me though as I'm on the fence about the whole thing as it is, I'm not arguing for or against.

I see very valid points on both sides.

Ohfour · Hooker

Still waiting....seems like I will be waiting forever. No response means they know I am right...

Good to know! :)

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Who cares why? Well then dont complain when other issues are rammed down your kids throats.

Death is not an "issue". Death IS. Every single person will die. You cannot shield your kids from that.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Who cares why? Well then dont complain when other issues are rammed down your kids throats.
Death is not an "issue". Death IS. Every single person will die. You cannot shield your kids from that.

Except me! I'm immortal.

biggrin