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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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We had a whole Dear someone column on picky eaters and MIL's.  DN and I went out tonight.  We were talking and she told me that Sparkly has been lying to me about stuff I make.  He made a huge deal about how much he liked my broccoli and cheese casserole.  So I go out of my way to make it when he comes over to eat.  Found out today he hates it.  He was just telling me he liked it.  And we left them a bunch of turkey at Thanksgiving because he said he'd make sandwiches.  DN said it took her a week to eat all the leftovers because he wouldn't eat them.  Same thing with pie.  We left them a pumpkin pie and a pecan pie because HE ASKED FOR IT.  He won't eat them.  I'm really super pissed at him right now.  I don't care if he doesn't like something.  He's an adult.  He can pass and say no thank you.  I'll probably say, "You don't like xyz?".  But that will be the end of it.  It just irritates me that he's been telling me likes certain things, then I go out of my way to make them, and he doesn't really like it at all.  DH is super pissed.  He said from now on we plan a menu and if he doesn't like what we're fvcking having he can bring a sandwich!  Agh.  Why do people do this?



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I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.

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I don't understand why he'd say he liked something if he didn't. That's just weird.

I'll take his portion of the broccoli and cheese casserole. Yummy!

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Mixing broccoli and cheese should be against culinary law. There. I said it.

All it does is ruin perfectly good broccoli.

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I think it makes it taste better.

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You may have ALL of my servings of it. With my compliments. :D

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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I make a homemade broccoli and cheese. The cheese sauce has two different kinds of cheese and I use cream in it. Plus I top it with a crusty topping made of gluten free crumbs and mixed with a touch of olive oil to make it extra tasty.

I don't even care what he likes or doesn't like. That's the part that irritates me. If he doesn't like something, fine. He's an adult. I am not going to force the man to eat anything he doesn't like. But really, don't go out of your way to tell me you LIKE it. I don't want to spend extra time cooking something I think you like just to find out you don't.

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Thank you :)

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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Lindley, you will love my broccoli and cheese casserole.

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Sounds delicious njn

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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I love cooking. I actually enjoy it. It's fun for me. I would call it a hobby. People tell me I should cook for a living but that would take all the fun out of it.

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I volunteer to be a guinea pig for your cooking. I love trying new things.

On another note, I now want broccoli and cheese casserole.

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I don't mind cooking when I can. I'm not much of a baker. I make a awesome chili and chicken n dumplings.

I don't blame you for not wanting to cook for a living. It would take the fun out of it.

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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chef wrote:

I volunteer to be a guinea pig for your cooking. I love trying new things.

On another note, I now want broccoli and cheese casserole.


 99.9% of the time my "experiments" come out wonderful.  On the rare occasion that they don't I excuse the family from eating them.  They do however try it and they never make me feel bad.  I rarely have a fail but about a month or so ago I tried this ultimate grill cheese sandwich recipe.  It was a total fail.  The family gave it a shot and I told them not to worry about it.  They were all so cute telling me how everything else I make is so good.  Gotta love em.



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Yes, I do not get going out of his way to say he likes it. A little strange, to say the least. As you say, he is an adult; either eat a bit to be polite or just pass on it. No reason to praise something you do not like. You would think he knew he was going to get more of it if he praised it......

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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karl271 wrote:

Yes, I do not get going out of his way to say he likes it. A little strange, to say the least. As you say, he is an adult; either eat a bit to be polite or just pass on it. No reason to praise something you do not like. You would think he knew he was going to get more of it if he praised it......


 EXACTLY!!  He's a very very picky eater.  We knew that when they started dating.  I was prepared for it.  So knowing that there was so much he DIDN'T like I worked really hard to find dishes he DID like.  Which is like...nothing.  DH says from now on I cook what I want and he can eat or not eat.  DH was more ticked than I was!



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Do not blame him at all for being more ticked. I would be, too.

Are you any good with sauerkraut and spareribs? LOL That is definitely something a person has to like if they are going to eat it. I love it.

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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I cook a mean sparerib. Never made sauerkraut though. LOL Probably won't. For our wedding shower we did a hot dog bar. We had a really casual affair and it was a bbq. All the dogs you could eat, chips and dip, cake, and drinks. We had about fifty toppings for the dogs. Sauerkraut was one of them. Three years late we still had the jar in the fridge and I tossed it.

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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
chef wrote:

I volunteer to be a guinea pig for your cooking. I love trying new things.

On another note, I now want broccoli and cheese casserole.


 99.9% of the time my "experiments" come out wonderful.  On the rare occasion that they don't I excuse the family from eating them.  They do however try it and they never make me feel bad.  I rarely have a fail but about a month or so ago I tried this ultimate grill cheese sandwich recipe.  It was a total fail.  The family gave it a shot and I told them not to worry about it.  They were all so cute telling me how everything else I make is so good.  Gotta love em.


That's the second time you mentioned the awful grilled cheese sandwich.

What was wrong with it? 



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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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The recipe called for three kinds of cheese, shredded, and add mayo and garlic salt to it. Then you spread this concoction on bread and grill. I'm not sure what exactly it was. One it was too salty. The garlic salt was not good in it. And two, the mayo concoction just felt wrong in the mouth. It wasn't ooey gooey cheesy. It was more like slimy oil. I followed the recipe exactly because I had been told by two others that it was good. My family just couldn't do it. Now, I do have to add that we use real butter and real cheese. Not the pasteurized processed food stuff. So maybe it just was our taste buds? I mean, my family rarely complains so I know it was bad.

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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LOL I just told DH I was posting about THE Grilled Cheese Sandwiches. He immediately said, "Oh no. They were...(long pause)...different." My family cares deeply about my feelings!

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I never use garlic salt. I find it has a weird taste. Garlic powder tastes more like garlic.
I like cheese. I like mayo. I like garlic. It sounds like it should have been good, but wasn't.

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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Yeah, they weren't. They sounded good. I love cheese. Cheese is good. It just didn't do well for me. Who knows. I won't even try that recipe again! Oh well, you fail sometimes. Most of the time I succeed! And I'm one that's known for not following recipes. I'm the cook who opens the pantry and just starts throwing stuff in. Once I accidentally put pumpkin pie spice in a pot of beef stew. I add curry and it came out wonderful!

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I think it was rather rude of him to insist you leave the food when he had no intent to eating anything. What a waste of food that someone else may have wanted.

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It sounds to me like he wanted to make up for being so picky by insisting he liked something you made. It sounds to me like he was trying to be polite.

And how many of us have had good intentions about something we didn't follow through on? Not making turkey sandwiches is hardly a crime punishable by death. I always intend to, yet I am so turkey ed out from the say I never do.
Tell your DH to take a chill pill, this is much ado about nothing.

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Lindley wrote:

I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.


 I do not like broccoli and cheese casserole.  No way.  Blech.



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On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

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It sounds like he was going overboard on trying to make you feel good about your cooking. It is very odd that he would request things he won't eat. I just wouldn't bother with any food requests or anything else from him. Does DN know you are mad?

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

It sounds to me like he wanted to make up for being so picky by insisting he liked something you made. It sounds to me like he was trying to be polite.

And how many of us have had good intentions about something we didn't follow through on? Not making turkey sandwiches is hardly a crime punishable by death. I always intend to, yet I am so turkey ed out from the say I never do.
Tell your DH to take a chill pill, this is much ado about nothing.


   I have to agree.  Taking some big "offense" over this seems silly.  Why can't you just assume he had good intentions?  From now on, just make whatever you please and he will either eat it or not.  Does he eat the brocolic and cheese casserole when he is at your house?  Maybe he is eating it to be polite.  Maybe he actually kind of likes it once in awhile at your house in your company.  Either way, so what?  He is getting fed and he isn't going to die eating something he doesnt' particularly care for.   But now you know, so you can either make it and he can eat a peanut butter sandwich or not make it.  Your choice.

  As for leftovers, i personally hate taking home leftovers.  I usually try to decline and people literally force them on you.  Well, i know that we probably won't eat them or i have no intention to eat them.  YOu can only decline so much so you then take them to keep peace.  Yes, i have thrown away leftovers.  Doesn't mean i didn't love the dinner.  It is just that i am not hungry for that as leftovers.  Big diff.

So, you can choose to read something offensive into this or not.  



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On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

It sounds to me like he wanted to make up for being so picky by insisting he liked something you made. It sounds to me like he was trying to be polite.

And how many of us have had good intentions about something we didn't follow through on? Not making turkey sandwiches is hardly a crime punishable by death. I always intend to, yet I am so turkey ed out from the say I never do.
Tell your DH to take a chill pill, this is much ado about nothing.


 I think the problem is requesting she make something he won't eat.  That crosses a bit of a line.



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Well, now she knows he is just blowing air out of his pie hole so just make she wants to make. He can eat it or not.

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Vette's SS!!

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My boyfriend is always asking me to make a vanilla cake. When I make it, he usually eats one piece, then remembers he doesn't really like sweets.
So what if he didn't eat the pie?
It sounds like he was a) trying to be polite and b) a miscommunication occurred somewhere and c) he prefers the broccoli and cheese dish to other less pleasant things.
Oh, amd that DN is possibly trying to sabatouge her own happiness by making a bone of contention between you and Sparkly.

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Vette's SS!!

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I mean seriously, what was the POINT of telling you he hates the casserole and didn't eat the pie?


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  Well, DN isn't doing anyone any favors.  She needs to be a bit more mature about her relationship.  To just blab that like gossip and hurt NJN's feelings is really ridiculous.  What is to be gained by that?  If you are telling someone something about someone else and you know it is going to hurt them, the only reason to do that is to be a Gossip.  However, if her intention was to tell NJN that while she appreciates her efforts at cooking, that they do not really eat the leftovers, then OK but I think she could have gone about that in a more delicate way as well.  There are many times in life where i found out 'information" but I didn't then run to someone to tell them "information" that was going to hurt them, that is pointless.



-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Thursday 10th of December 2015 06:56:30 AM

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I don't like broccoli. I can eat it but it isn't a go to vegetable no matter what you cover it or bury it in.

I don't think I'd be mad if I found out someone didn't like my food.

It might hurt my feelings for a bit but I'd get over it.

And I didn't see where he asked for anything. Just that he agreed without a fuss.

And if the same thing is on the menu every time, well, what are you supposed to do?

Squash casserole is good, as far as casseroles go.

 



-- Edited by lilyofcourse on Thursday 10th of December 2015 07:32:53 AM

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Think of the reverse. What if he just came out and said "I hate your broccoli casserole"? That would also hurt your feelings. A lot of people don't like broccoli. It's something that has a very strong flavor. I like it at times. Once in awhile. DH absolutely hates it. I can eat it raw, steamed or smothered in cheese when i am in the mood for it. If i am not in the mood for it, i don't really like how it smells.

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I'm in the "he was just being polite" category and do not see where he requested the food, just the pie. And maybe he asked for the pies for DN because he knew she liked them. I wouldn't be angry. Maybe a little embarrassed. I would feel bad I kept inflicting food on him that he really didn't like.

DH & I were married for years before I learned he doesn't like asparagus. For years I made it because I thought he liked it. He ate it, because he was being polite. But then he finally said it was just "ok" to him and not really a favorite. I still make it, and he still eats it. I just don't make it as often and try to have another veggie with the meal for him. I felt bad about serving it, but admired him for putting up with it all those years.

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On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

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My evil side would make all his "favorites" for the next dinner you invite him to.

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Lawyerlady wrote:

My evil side would make all his "favorites" for the next dinner you invite him to.


Oh, the temptation!!!!!wink

But seriously. You already know he's picky. Next time you invite them to dinner, just plan your menu.

And, if he eats, he eats.

If not, oh well.

He's an adult. He won't starve. 



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Lawyerlady wrote:
Lindley wrote:

I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.


 I do not like broccoli and cheese casserole.  No way.  Blech.


 Double BLECH...because of the broccoli.

NJN, do you make roasted cauliflower?

flan



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I can't stand being lied to.

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flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lindley wrote:

I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.


 I do not like broccoli and cheese casserole.  No way.  Blech.


 Double BLECH...because of the broccoli.

NJN, do you make roasted cauliflower?

flan


 That is worse than broccoli.



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Lawyerlady wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lindley wrote:

I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.


 I do not like broccoli and cheese casserole.  No way.  Blech.


 Double BLECH...because of the broccoli.

NJN, do you make roasted cauliflower?

flan


 That is worse than broccoli.


 More for ME!!!

flan



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NJN- he might be a supertaster, which would explain the pickiness. Maybe not the rudeness of asking for things he won't eat, but it could be the reason he doesn't like it.

Being a supertaster is not easy when faced with a potluck or dinner elsewhere. The last time I tried to politely eat a brussel sprout, even though it was covered in butter, garlic and parmesan cheese, I gagged and almost threw up in front of the person who made it. Luckily she found it funny.

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Lindley wrote:

I don't understand why anyone would not like broccoli and cheese casserole. I'm sorry he doesn't like good food. I agree with you about cooking what you want and just let him eat a sandwich.


Because broccoli is a poisonous vegetable.   



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I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

I think it was rather rude of him to insist you leave the food when he had no intent to eating anything. What a waste of food that someone else may have wanted.


 This was the big deal.  DN was venting to me.  Here's how it went down.  I had done a lot of the cooking so I was out of the kitchen during clean up time.  DH and I said ahead of time that they could have whatever they wanted.  SPARKLY went through and decided what they wanted to keep from the dinner.  Two days later he went and bought frozen pizza and lunch meat.  He told DN he hadn't wanted any leftovers at all.  SHE was pissed and livid.  She was raised to appreciate what we have and not throw good food in the trash.  DH and I brought very little turkey home.  We didn't care but we thought they (HE) wanted it.  She said she got tired of eating all the food HE asked for.  And she wasn't trying to hurt my feelings. 

Some of you are acting like he has every right to be sick of stuff because I make it all the time.  That's BS.  I've made the casserole a total of three times.  Whenever they're coming over I usually ask DN to ask him what he wants.  I'll say something like we have xyz veggies.  Is there one he prefers?  Or would he rather have mashed potatoes or baked.  She'll ask and I make it.  I'm freaking trying to be nice. 

He is a picky eater because of his mom.  I have no intentions of changing him.  His mom used food as a weapon and now he hardly eats anything.  They are going to have a very difficult time when kids come along because she eats super healthy and he lives off frozen pizza and sandwiches.   SS spent the night right after Thanksgiving and she fed her and SS leftover Thanksgiving and he made a single serve pizza.  SS was eyeing the pizza.  His mom used to do weird things with food so he has a lot of hang ups.  He despises his mom. 

He's not "being polite".  I have told him over and over and over again to tell me what he likes or dislikes and I will try to find something he likes.  I'm not super biotch MIL.  He's a freaking adult.  Either you like it or you don't.  Don't tell me you like it if you don't.  Don't lie.  So from now on we will make what we want and he can eat or not eat.



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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

I think it was rather rude of him to insist you leave the food when he had no intent to eating anything. What a waste of food that someone else may have wanted.


 This was the big deal.  DN was venting to me.  Here's how it went down.  I had done a lot of the cooking so I was out of the kitchen during clean up time.  DH and I said ahead of time that they could have whatever they wanted.  SPARKLY went through and decided what they wanted to keep from the dinner.  Two days later he went and bought frozen pizza and lunch meat.  He told DN he hadn't wanted any leftovers at all.  SHE was pissed and livid.  She was raised to appreciate what we have and not throw good food in the trash.  DH and I brought very little turkey home.  We didn't care but we thought they (HE) wanted it.  She said she got tired of eating all the food HE asked for.  And she wasn't trying to hurt my feelings. 

Some of you are acting like he has every right to be sick of stuff because I make it all the time.  That's BS.  I've made the casserole a total of three times.  Whenever they're coming over I usually ask DN to ask him what he wants.  I'll say something like we have xyz veggies.  Is there one he prefers?  Or would he rather have mashed potatoes or baked.  She'll ask and I make it.  I'm freaking trying to be nice. 

He is a picky eater because of his mom.  I have no intentions of changing him.  His mom used food as a weapon and now he hardly eats anything.  They are going to have a very difficult time when kids come along because she eats super healthy and he lives off frozen pizza and sandwiches.   SS spent the night right after Thanksgiving and she fed her and SS leftover Thanksgiving and he made a single serve pizza.  SS was eyeing the pizza.  His mom used to do weird things with food so he has a lot of hang ups.  He despises his mom. 

He's not "being polite".  I have told him over and over and over again to tell me what he likes or dislikes and I will try to find something he likes.  I'm not super biotch MIL.  He's a freaking adult.  Either you like it or you don't.  Don't tell me you like it if you don't.  Don't lie.  So from now on we will make what we want and he can eat or not eat.


 That's what I would do, NJN.

There's no point in bending over backwards, trying to make stuff that he says he likes, when he's not being honest with you.



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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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And that's what DH said. He said why bother making a separate dish for him just because you THINK he's going to like it and he actually doesn't. He will usually just decline the invite and DN comes alone. Like the time I made taco soup. She loves it, he hates it. He stayed home and she came over for dinner. No skin off my nose. From now it will be dinner as usual.

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He definitely sounds as though he has an eating disorder. My cousin married a man who will only eat Kraft mac 'n cheese. I couldn't believe it. But she says that's the only thing he'll eat, and he confirmed it. He must be so constipated all the time.

Just make your meals and let him decide if he's hungry.

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Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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It's not an eating disorder. His family is...messed up. He's super close to his dad but apparently growing their mom had one affair after another. And I mean like dozens of them. She would tell the boys, "You need to eat those green beans so I can go see my b/f." So they would sit there and sit there so she wouldn't leave. Finally she would put their plates in the fridge and serve it to them for breakfast. She would also use treats to win their alliance. He said when they were young she would buy them each a large pizza of their very own if they didn't tell dad she was gone all day.

He really hates his mom. He says that she would sign them up for the angel tree program and after she left she'd go to the liquor store and buy booze and cigarettes.

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“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I'll rise!”
Maya Angelou



My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

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Wow.

That would be a huge red flag for me relationship wise.

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