TOTALLY GEEKED!

FNW · Guru

RE: Where's Dear Whoever Now?

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Eh, I am not worried about what you think of him. I care only about how he treats her and if she is happy.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

lilyofcourse wrote:
Wow.

That would be a huge red flag for me relationship wise.

Why? Because his mom cheated? Seriously? He is very close to his dad. He loves DN. He treats her great. In fact, he is super good with her stubbornness and other bad qualities. We have talked to him about his mom. We told him he needs to forgive her. Not for her but for his sake. But then we left it at that. And his Dad adores DN. As does his Grandma.

Lindley · Guru

It's not his fault his mother was the way she wss. I'm sure it hurt him as a child. Maybe he should see a counselor before they get married.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
Wow.

That would be a huge red flag for me relationship wise.
Why? Because his mom cheated? Seriously? He is very close to his dad. He loves DN. He treats her great. In fact, he is super good with her stubbornness and other bad qualities. We have talked to him about his mom. We told him he needs to forgive her. Not for her but for his sake. But then we left it at that. And his Dad adores DN. As does his Grandma.

Did you miss the "for me" part?

Lindley · Guru

Lindley wrote:
It's not his fault his mother was the way she wss. I'm sure it hurt him as a child. Maybe he should see a counselor before they get married.

I posted before njn, you know him and care about him disregard my suggestion for seeing a counselor. I thought you might have been concerned about his past relationship with his mother.

FNW · Guru

I thought she was concerned as well.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

She's not concerned about his relationship with his mom. She was ticked that he had asked for all the food and then didn't want to eat it. She was irritated at him for not just being on the up and up on the food stuff. She said she spent a week eating all the turkey because he refused to eat it.

It is not his fault his mom cheated. But obviously it left him with some issues. We have not suggested counseling to him. We have suggested SHE suggest him getting some. It's up to him. We do like him. I hope he finds peace with his mom. For his sake. He doesn't have to have her in his life bug it's good when you can learn to let go of the anger.

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Eh, I am not worried about what you think of him. I care only about how he treats her and if she is happy.

You spent page one saying how irritated you are with him, now you are spending page two defending everything about him.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Yes. I am irritated that he told me he liked stuff I made for him to eat. That doesn't mean I hate the guy on the whole. You've spent pages bitching and griping about your son's g/f but that doesn't mean you hate her. Or does it?

Being irritated at him over one thing doesn't mean I despise the guy. Good grief. Exaggerate much?

huskerbb · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Yes. I am irritated that he told me he liked stuff I made for him to eat. That doesn't mean I hate the guy on the whole. You've spent pages bitching and griping about your son's g/f but that doesn't mean you hate her. Or does it?

Being irritated at him over one thing doesn't mean I despise the guy. Good grief. Exaggerate much?

I never used the word hate. I said you were defending everything about him.

Tinydancer · Guru

husker kind of has a point. I can understand that you want to defend sparkly though NJN. I can talk shyt about my family but don't let anyone else try!!!!!

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Tinydancer wrote:
husker kind of has a point. I can understand that you want to defend sparkly though NJN. I can talk shyt about my family but don't let anyone else try!!!!!

I was irritated that he told me he liked stuff he didn't like. He's a grown up. He should have just said I don't like it. No biggie. I'm just more irritated he lied. Other than that I like him. And I'm not marrying him so the other stuff isn't MY problem. I was just trying to explain why he has food issues.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Fort Worth Mom wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
My evil side would make all his "favorites" for the next dinner you invite him to.
Oh, the temptation!!!!!
But seriously. You already know he's picky. Next time you invite them to dinner, just plan your menu.
And, if he eats, he eats.
If not, oh well.
He's an adult. He won't starve.

But dinner was at Sparkly's and DN's place. How about next time, THEY make the food?

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
husker kind of has a point. I can understand that you want to defend sparkly though NJN. I can talk shyt about my family but don't let anyone else try!!!!!
I was irritated that he told me he liked stuff he didn't like. He's a grown up. He should have just said I don't like it. No biggie. I'm just more irritated he lied. Other than that I like him. And I'm not marrying him so the other stuff isn't MY problem. I was just trying to explain why he has food issues.

You're fine. I understand.

This should be a place where we can vent about whatever we want.

I think it's great for him to be exposed to a GOOD marriage (yours).

flan

FNW · Guru

I would be interested to see what they make each night. I find it hard to believe he eats pizza and lunch meat every day. But then again, my cousin's husband only eats kraft mac 'n chees.e

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

flan327 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
husker kind of has a point. I can understand that you want to defend sparkly though NJN. I can talk shyt about my family but don't let anyone else try!!!!!
I was irritated that he told me he liked stuff he didn't like. He's a grown up. He should have just said I don't like it. No biggie. I'm just more irritated he lied. Other than that I like him. And I'm not marrying him so the other stuff isn't MY problem. I was just trying to explain why he has food issues.
You're fine. I understand.
This should be a place where we can vent about whatever we want.
I think it's great for him to be exposed to a GOOD marriage (yours).
flan

Thanks. He even says he loves us even though we're weird and crazy. He told his dad DH and I act like two overgrown teenagers. DN made about half the food at her house and I made about half the food at mine. We ate at their house. We've always known he's picky. They eat out a lot. He likes Mexican but takes a lot of stuff off his food. And steaks and pizza. He likes hot dogs and hamburgers. He pretty much is bread and meat. He eats potatoes. He just doesn't eat veggies or beans or things like potato salad. He does eat more than pizza and sandwiches.

TrudyML · Guru

FNW wrote:
I would be interested to see what they make each night. I find it hard to believe he eats pizza and lunch meat every day. But then again, my cousin's husband only eats kraft mac 'n chees.e

Whoa

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Isn't Sparkly in his late 20s, early 30s?

Maybe it was his mom's fault when he was 18.

But now it's a choice.

Lindley · Guru

Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Lindley wrote:
Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.

Apparently to Lily it is. And this isn't even about the being picky part. I don't care if he's picky. People are not understanding that. I'm not marrying him nor do I want to change him. I was just irritated to find out I was making special dishes just for him and he didn't like them.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

No. It isnt.

It is childish to be so picky you only eat one or two things, lie about what you will eat, and take food you know you won't eat.

So, when he was 18, maybe he could have blamed his mom. (I don't get that either cause at 18, my kids are very vocal and up front about what they do and don't like.)

But as old as Sparkly is, it's all on him.

He has chosen a course of action in which he lied.

Lindley · Guru

Maybe he didn't want to hurt njn's feelings. I'm not saying it is right to lie about liking something but maybe he thought he was making her happy. He made a mistake as we all do. We have all done things we regret and even now at 56 I'm still not perfect.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Oh, I'm sure he was trying to be polite.

huskerbb · Guru

Lindley wrote:
Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.

Being around an excessively picky eater is a nuisance. Everyone has certain likes and dislikes, but when someone picks at every meal and has a hard time eating anything, it's a pain.

Its also rather childish.

Lindley · Guru

huskerbb wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.
Being around an excessively picky eater is a nuisance. Everyone has certain likes and dislikes, but when someone picks at every meal and has a hard time eating anything, it's a pain.

Its also rather childish.

Maybe a nuisance but not a crime.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

You can be as picky as u like. Just say No thank u when something is offered. You dont have to explain why. And hosts need to stop being pushy asking why or pushing food on someone who clearly doesnt want it.

Honeys_Mom · Mod & Permanent Board Sweetheart

Lindley wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.
Being around an excessively picky eater is a nuisance. Everyone has certain likes and dislikes, but when someone picks at every meal and has a hard time eating anything, it's a pain.

Its also rather childish.
Maybe a nuisance but not a crime.

I think if they're complaining about not liking what's served, it's rude. But as long as they aren't complaining, it should not cause a problem for anyone else whether they eat or not. Some people aren't picky, they just aren't all that hungry. People sometimes consider me a "picky" eater, I guess because I don't shovel it in like they do, LOL!

Edited to add: I agree with LGS.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Honeys_Mom wrote:
Lindley wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Its not a crime or a sin or a character flaw to be picky.
Being around an excessively picky eater is a nuisance. Everyone has certain likes and dislikes, but when someone picks at every meal and has a hard time eating anything, it's a pain.

Its also rather childish.
Maybe a nuisance but not a crime.
I think if they're complaining about not liking what's served, it's rude. But as long as they aren't complaining, it should not cause a problem for anyone else whether they eat or not. Some people aren't picky, they just aren't all that hungry. People sometimes consider me a "picky" eater, I guess because I don't shovel it in like they do, LOL!
Edited to add: I agree with LGS.

I'm a "picky" eater, too, but I don't lie about what I like to eat.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lindley wrote:
Maybe he didn't want to hurt njn's feelings. I'm not saying it is right to lie about liking something but maybe he thought he was making her happy. He made a mistake as we all do. We have all done things we regret and even now at 56 I'm still not perfect.

That's not what I heard!!!

flan

Lindley · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Maybe he didn't want to hurt njn's feelings. I'm not saying it is right to lie about liking something but maybe he thought he was making her happy. He made a mistake as we all do. We have all done things we regret and even now at 56 I'm still not perfect.
That's not what I heard!!!
flan

My past is catching up with me.... biggrin

Honeys_Mom · Mod & Permanent Board Sweetheart

Lindley wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Maybe he didn't want to hurt njn's feelings. I'm not saying it is right to lie about liking something but maybe he thought he was making her happy. He made a mistake as we all do. We have all done things we regret and even now at 56 I'm still not perfect.
That's not what I heard!!!
flan
My past is catching up with me....

Lindley, we're very close - I turned 57 last month. I say we are officially "aged to perfection". smile

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I'm older than both of you gals...

flan

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Okay Lily, enough. I'm tired of your crap. Really, I am. You need to stop. You're so quick to tell everyone else how to live their life when your own behavior involves killing off a whole religion. So don't lecture me. His parents only divorced a few years ago. And I really don't give a damn what you think he SHOULD do, say, or feel. You think when you turn 18 you flip this magical switch in your mind and all the old feelings just go bye bye. I understand how perfect you are. You tell us every day. Not every person measures up to your perfection. It's his life. His to work out. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. And for you to say he has chosen a life path of lying is BS. Again, I know how freaking perfect you are but maybe, like Lindley said, he just didn't want to hurt my feelings. I don't why he did it. I don't even CARE why he did it. So take your judgments and go judge someone else. I don't need them, he doesn't need them. And it's getting so old.

Apparently it's this board isn't for venting anymore. I will no longer go out of my way to make special food for him. It's really that simple. I control my own life. I'm fine with not cooking specifically for him. I thought I was being nice. Apparently that niceness got confused somewhere along the way. He is welcome in my home anytime. He can eat or not eat. Pretty simple.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

I'll give NJN TWO

flan

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Sister - you do you. I am here for you NJN.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Mellow Momma wrote:
Sister - you do you. I am here for you NJN.

Thanks. I vented. I'm over it. DH and I decided we'll just cook whatever. If he eats he eats and if he doesn't he doesn't. We're good. All in all, he's a good kid. I like him.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Sister - you do you. I am here for you NJN.
Thanks. I vented. I'm over it. DH and I decided we'll just cook whatever. If he eats he eats and if he doesn't he doesn't. We're good. All in all, he's a good kid. I like him.

And he makes your DN happy.

flan

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

flan327 wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Sister - you do you. I am here for you NJN.
Thanks. I vented. I'm over it. DH and I decided we'll just cook whatever. If he eats he eats and if he doesn't he doesn't. We're good. All in all, he's a good kid. I like him.
And he makes your DN happy.
flan

Yep. And that's the most important thing of all.

Tinydancer · Guru

Until he doesn't then we can all sing kumbaya.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Because picky eaters abuse their GF's?

WTF?

flan

Tinydancer · Guru

Where did I say he abused anyone? Paranoid much?

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Tinydancer wrote:
Until he doesn't then we can all sing kumbaya.

Yeah, this statement makes no sense. They've been together for three years and she's still thrilled with him. He's a picky eater. Big hairy deal. I'm really not sure what you're insinuating here but it sounds really ugly and hateful.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Okay Lily, enough. I'm tired of your crap. Really, I am. You need to stop. You're so quick to tell everyone else how to live their life when your own behavior involves killing off a whole religion. So don't lecture me. His parents only divorced a few years ago. And I really don't give a damn what you think he SHOULD do, say, or feel. You think when you turn 18 you flip this magical switch in your mind and all the old feelings just go bye bye. I understand how perfect you are. You tell us every day. Not every person measures up to your perfection. It's his life. His to work out. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. And for you to say he has chosen a life path of lying is BS. Again, I know how freaking perfect you are but maybe, like Lindley said, he just didn't want to hurt my feelings. I don't why he did it. I don't even CARE why he did it. So take your judgments and go judge someone else. I don't need them, he doesn't need them. And it's getting so old.

Apparently it's this board isn't for venting anymore. I will no longer go out of my way to make special food for him. It's really that simple. I control my own life. I'm fine with not cooking specifically for him. I thought I was being nice. Apparently that niceness got confused somewhere along the way. He is welcome in my home anytime. He can eat or not eat. Pretty simple.

Oh boo hoo princess.

Here's the thing.

You laid out this belly ache on a public message board.

You know you will not get the big rah rah from everyone.

You don't like my response. That's fine.

I don't care.

You complain about something or someone on a daily basis.

If you can't handle the responses, that's on you.

Tinydancer · Guru

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
Tinydancer wrote:
Until he doesn't then we can all sing kumbaya.
Yeah, this statement makes no sense. They've been together for three years and she's still thrilled with him. He's a picky eater. Big hairy deal. I'm really not sure what you're insinuating here but it sounds really ugly and hateful.

I'm not insinuating anything. You weren't very happy with sparkly to begin with. Then you get upset because he lied to you. Then when husker agrees all of a sudden sparkly is just misguided. How you feel about him could change in the future so I was commenting on that. If you're that not worried about him lying then it's no skin off my nose.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

And you NEVER complain, Lily?

Oh, FFS.

flan

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

You're full of chit if you say I complain about someone on a daily basis. That's pure chit. A lie. And I will call you out on it. You're a liar. You have chosen a life of lying.

I VENTED. I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to vent. And your responses are rude and stupid. You never have anything nice to say. EVER. I guess your mother never taught you that old saying that if you don't have anything nice to say then say nothing at all. So yeah, I never expect anything nice to come out of your Bible thumping mouth anyway.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
You're full of chit if you say I complain about someone on a daily basis. That's pure chit. A lie. And I will call you out on it. You're a liar. You have chosen a life of lying.

I VENTED. I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to vent. And your responses are rude and stupid. You never have anything nice to say. EVER. I guess your mother never taught you that old saying that if you don't have anything nice to say then say nothing at all. So yeah, I never expect anything nice to come out of your Bible thumping mouth anyway.

Every day. Just look at your daily thread titles.

It's always something or someone.

Other boards, Facebook groups, people you know.

Every day.

And while you are perfectly free to vent, others are perfectly free to post their own thoughts and feelings on it.

So suck it up buttercup.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

You're a liar buttercup sweetcheeks. YOU LIE! And I can discuss things too. I love the damn double standard you have. You can bitch and moan about this and that but that's okay. If I participate in a discussion I'm complaining. Nope. I have the right to voice my opinion just like you have the right to spout all the stupid nonsense you spout off all the time.

And btw, the ONLY reason I posted this is that we JUST had a Dear Carolyn (or whoever) letter about a girl that took her b/f home to eat at her mom's. I thought it was pretty coincidental that I pretty much faced the same thing.

So little girl, go ahead and judge me and everyone else. You do it so well. I'm sure Jesus is so proud of you for that.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

"Suck it up, buttercup."

OH SNAP, NJN, SHE SURE TOLD YOU!

flan