TOTALLY GEEKED!

I don't know why we're supposed to have MORE compassion and leniency for them because they're gay. If the answer is no sex in the house and no mates/dates spend the night then that is the rule no matter who you sleep with.

Huh? She's 16 and mom is gonna move in her lover? Wth!

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

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Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I don't know why we're supposed to have MORE compassion and leniency for them because they're gay. If the answer is no sex in the house and no mates/dates spend the night then that is the rule no matter who you sleep with.

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-- Edited by I know what to do_sometimes on Monday 4th of January 2016 08:27:47 PM

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Times 100!

What the heck? 

huskerbb wrote:

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Prudie's response here was HORRIBLE.

She basically ignored the issue of them being more than friends and set up a double standard since it was a female.

She NEVER would have given that advice if we were talking a 16 year old boy wanting to stay with his girlfriend and not wanting said girlfriend's parent to tell his parents about it.

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The "New Prudie" is off to a rough start.

She's only 29.

She doesn't have enough life experience to be giving advice to the parents of teenagers.

JMHO.

 

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:

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I don't know why we're supposed to have MORE compassion and leniency for them because they're gay. If the answer is no sex in the house and no mates/dates spend the night then that is the rule no matter who you sleep with.

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 I agree 100%

What an idiot parent.

ed11563 wrote:

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IMHO, parents who think they can keep their 16 y.o. kids from continuing to have sex are mistaken.

 

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  Parents may not be able to stop them but doesn't mean they have to make it easier.

huskerbb wrote:

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Fort Worth Mom wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Prudie's response here was HORRIBLE.

She basically ignored the issue of them being more than friends and set up a double standard since it was a female.

She NEVER would have given that advice if we were talking a 16 year old boy wanting to stay with his girlfriend and not wanting said girlfriend's parent to tell his parents about it.

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The "New Prudie" is off to a rough start.

She's only 29.

She doesn't have enough life experience to be giving advice to the parents of teenagers.

JMHO.

 

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I don't think that overall she's so bad--but she did really miss the boat here, and I think her age and inexperience is a factor in that.  

 

I understand, to a degree, her concern for the kid--BUT--that does not trump parental rights.  Plus, there is really ZERO evidence that her parents would harm her in any way.

 

Parents say they'll "kill" their teenagers over lots of things--but it's an expression, not a literal threat.  "I'm going to kill that kid.".  

 

If there is truly a concern, then the LW doesn't have to "out" the kid--but neither does she have to go behind the other parents' back and allow this.  Just say no.  It's possible.

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I don't think overall that she's so bad, husker.

I'm sure she means well. And wants to do a good job as the new Prudie.

But, here is where she's coming from.

She's young. Only 29.

She's gay. (So, I think that is going to have some effect on her answers, to questions like these.)

She's not a parent. Not even of a toddler. Let alone, a teenager.

I'm sorry. I can't take her advice very seriously.

Not on these sorts of questions.

Again, JMHO.

ed11563 wrote:

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When I was 19, my 17 y.o. gf and her 16 y.o. sister went on the Pill at the same time. Their mother knew her daughters, and wasn't ready to be a grandparent. 

 

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 This has nothing to do with two female lesbians. I doubt they will need the pill.

For the summer? No i wouldnt take some neighbor's 16 yr old in for the summer.

weltschmerz wrote:

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I like her answer. What's wrong with letting this young lady stay with a family friend for the duration of the visit?
Outing her is absolutely the wrong thing to do.

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Absurd.  It's NOT a "family friend".  It's their teenage child's lover.

 

If this was a boy and they were boyfriend/girlfriend that advice would be absolutely stupid.  Because it's a girl, it's still stupid--but some people have stupid double standards.  

huskerbb wrote:

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ed11563 wrote:

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When I was 19, my 17 y.o. gf and her 16 y.o. sister went on the Pill at the same time. Their mother knew her daughters, and wasn't ready to be a grandparent. 

 

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So fvcking what?  That is IRRELEVANT. 

 

You can decide that crap for YOUR children--you don't get to do so for someone else's.

 

Plus, if you hadn't noticed, these are both FEMALE, so they don't need the damn pill.   

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I reckon that I am more liberal than you are. 

I don't know why we're supposed to have MORE compassion and leniency for them because they're gay. If the answer is no sex in the house and no mates/dates spend the night then that is the rule no matter who you sleep with.
- Nobody Just Nobody

_______________________________

This is where I'm at also.

huskerbb wrote:

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weltschmerz wrote:

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I like her answer. What's wrong with letting this young lady stay with a family friend for the duration of the visit?
Outing her is absolutely the wrong thing to do.

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Absurd.  It's NOT a "family friend".  It's their teenage child's lover.

 

If this was a boy and they were boyfriend/girlfriend that advice would be absolutely stupid.  Because it's a girl, it's still stupid--but some people have stupid double standards.  

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 The GF would be staying with a family friend. It's called a compromise.

And who knows if they're actually lovers, or just toying with the idea? How long was the family vacation where they met? A week? Two weeks?

Too many questions...

flan

Oh balonely! Being sexually active isn't only about getting pregnant. You need to time to develop your maturity and character and not have a lot of confusing situations and feelings. So, as a parent, you job is to protect your child's purity at a tender age . You don't go out of your way to set up situations to make this easy for them. Nope. I don't give a rip if this is 'awkward" to cancel now. You call the parents and say "I am sorry, we have had a change of plans and will not be able to accomodate and entertain your daughter for the summer". Period. You don't have to explain why.

BTW, it's January, i think they have ample to time to find other summer plans for their daughter. Sheesh.

Allowing my teenage daughter or son to have their boyfriend or girlfriend move in is not parenting. I can't believe people think this is ok. Making it easy for your children to have sex makes zero sense unless promiscuity is what you want to teach.

Is this Prudie even a parent, yet?

I wouldn't want anyone to stay the whole Summer.

That'd get on my last nerve.

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:

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Yeah. First of all , I am not going to accept responsibility for someone else's kid for an entire summer.

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 I'd have to know the girl better before I agreed.

flan

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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weltschmerz wrote:

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I like her answer. What's wrong with letting this young lady stay with a family friend for the duration of the visit?
Outing her is absolutely the wrong thing to do.

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Absurd.  It's NOT a "family friend".  It's their teenage child's lover.

 

If this was a boy and they were boyfriend/girlfriend that advice would be absolutely stupid.  Because it's a girl, it's still stupid--but some people have stupid double standards.  

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 The GF would be staying with a family friend. It's called a compromise.

And who knows if they're actually lovers, or just toying with the idea? How long was the family vacation where they met? A week? Two weeks?

Too many questions...

flan

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 No, there isn't.  The LW's daughter wants her mom to be deliberately deceptive to another teens parents.  That is not cool in any way.

if LW mom is fine with this arrangement, then be honest with the other parent and see if they feel the same.

huskerbb wrote:

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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They were friends when they parted, and they have only been gfs over the internet. There is zero chance of pregnancy, and both parents already agreed to the summer long visit, canceling now leads to a lot of awkward questions and hurt feeling all around, and as long as rules are in place and they are sleeping in separate rooms, I see very little downside to this arrangement.
I guess it wouldn't faze me at all.

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 So you would be fine with other parents lying to you?  That's what you would be doing to them.

 

hey mom, I'm going to stay at cindis house--while cindis mom leaves out the part where she and her daughter snort coke together and want your daughter to join them.  

 

That wouldnt "faze" you?  Really?

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 Snorting coke is a universe away from being a lesbian.

flan

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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They were friends when they parted, and they have only been gfs over the internet. There is zero chance of pregnancy, and both parents already agreed to the summer long visit, canceling now leads to a lot of awkward questions and hurt feeling all around, and as long as rules are in place and they are sleeping in separate rooms, I see very little downside to this arrangement.
I guess it wouldn't faze me at all.

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 So you would be fine with other parents lying to you?  That's what you would be doing to them.

 

hey mom, I'm going to stay at cindis house--while cindis mom leaves out the part where she and her daughter snort coke together and want your daughter to join them.  

 

That wouldnt "faze" you?  Really?

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 Snorting coke is a universe away from being a lesbian.

flan

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 It's the principle that the girls parents have a right to know the nature of the visit.  Staying the summer at a friend's house vs staying the summer at a lovers house. 

flan327 wrote:

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huskerbb wrote:

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Dona Worry Be Happy wrote:

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They were friends when they parted, and they have only been gfs over the internet. There is zero chance of pregnancy, and both parents already agreed to the summer long visit, canceling now leads to a lot of awkward questions and hurt feeling all around, and as long as rules are in place and they are sleeping in separate rooms, I see very little downside to this arrangement.
I guess it wouldn't faze me at all.

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 So you would be fine with other parents lying to you?  That's what you would be doing to them.

 

hey mom, I'm going to stay at cindis house--while cindis mom leaves out the part where she and her daughter snort coke together and want your daughter to join them.  

 

That wouldnt "faze" you?  Really?

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 Snorting coke is a universe away from being a lesbian.

flan

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 Good God is that a dumb post.   this has NOTHING to do with being a lesbian.  

It primarily has to do with lying to another parent--do you want other parents lying to you about your child? 

 

Secondarily ly it has to do with two teenagers who want to be sexually active in one parent's home.  even IF you are ok with that, and even IF you don't like the comparison to drugs--what gives you the fvcking right to make decisions about sexual activity for SOMEONE ELSE'S child? 

Who died and made you God?  That is the height of arrogance.