TOTALLY GEEKED!

huskerbb · Guru

RE: Dear Abby - Heartbroken 4 year old

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Well, SOME people obviously care more about keeping the peace than how people treat their kid.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.

No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.
No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.

Well apparently you can't see the difference between our approaches so you keep having to say we "don't care about our kids, blah, blah". evileye

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.
No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.
Well apparently you can't see the difference between our approaches so you keep having to say we "don't care about our kids, blah, blah".

As apposed to saying we raise our kids to be victims and not handle disappointment? How hypocritical of you.

huskerbb · Guru

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.

Exactly.

huskerbb · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.
No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.

Do them "wrong"? this is NOTHING.

What are you going to do when they don't get into the college they want? Demand an apology from the president? Arrange a meeting with their boss if they get fired?

huskerbb · Guru

Heck, I'd be like "thank God, now we don't have that hassle."

Oh, and my kids were in 3 weddings.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Two things are extremely apparant.

1. Husker has never been a little girl.

2. Husker has never been the parent of a little girl.
3. husker cannot imagine any perspective other than his own MALE one.
flan
What a sexist comment. I have veen a little girl and i have a daughter.

It's not uncommon for a little girl to like princesses. She suddenly gets the opportunity to BE a princess for a day.

Then, for no logical reason, it gets taken away.

So maybe husker just doesn't get it.

flan

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.
No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.
Do them "wrong"? this is NOTHING.

What are you going to do when they don't get into the college they want? Demand an apology from the president? Arrange a meeting with their boss if they get fired?

I hate to tell you but there's a rather huge difference between a 4-year-old and an 18-year-old.

If you don't stand up for your child when they've been wronged, what message does that send? Yes, adults suck sometimes, but at least show the SIL that her actions have consequences.

flan

Lindley · Guru

Yes they will be hurt and disappointed in their life but the first betrayal should not come from those who are supposed to love them.

Cheerios4606 · Guru

I would be the one on the phone telling them, "well I am not breaking the news to her... Here, you talk to her and tell her. Suzie, come to the phone! Aunt prissy wants to talk to you about her wedding!"

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

huskerbb wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
The most anxious and messed up kids are the ones who's mothers can't let things go and keep bring all of the hurts to the forefront of life. I don't raise my kids to be victims. Some people aren't nice. So, you can agonize over 'OMG i am so hurt i can't be the flower girl" or you can just say "oh you can't be the flower girl, let's go do something else". For the most part it is the MOMS of these kids who nurse all of those wounds back to life over and over.
No, the most messed up kids are the ones whose parents don't give a **** when people do them wrong.
Do them "wrong"? this is NOTHING.

What are you going to do when they don't get into the college they want? Demand an apology from the president? Arrange a meeting with their boss if they get fired?

Husker, if they don't get into the college they want, it will be because they did not qualify to do so - they didn't earn it. THIS debacle had nothing to do with the child, it wasn't her fault, her responsibility, or the consequences of her actions. So, do not try to compare a lack of accomplishments with just being treated as if you don't matter.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

If the bride "wasn't sure" who she wanted she should have kept her big fat mouth shut till she decided. If she changed her mind she should have let the mom know asap. SIL sounds like an inconsiderate bitch. Not someone I'd want to hang around with.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
If the bride "wasn't sure" who she wanted she should have kept her big fat mouth shut till she decided. If she changed her mind she should have let the mom know asap. SIL sounds like an inconsiderate bitch. Not someone I'd want to hang around with.

And I can't BELIEVE this child's grandmother went along with this. WTH? That family is f'ed up.

Nobody Just Nobody · Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

Lawyerlady wrote:
Nobody Just Nobody wrote:
If the bride "wasn't sure" who she wanted she should have kept her big fat mouth shut till she decided. If she changed her mind she should have let the mom know asap. SIL sounds like an inconsiderate bitch. Not someone I'd want to hang around with.
And I can't BELIEVE this child's grandmother went along with this. WTH? That family is f'ed up.

Exactly. I read this to my DH and he said that this would be a HUGE deal. He said he'd have to step in.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I'm not inviting certain people to mom and dad's thing because their kids are brats.

And the one that I have to invite might get his butt popped if his mom and dad don't watch him.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Husker you seem to think that it being a HUGE disappointment and a crushing blow to the little girl and teaching the child that sometimes people suck are mutually exclusive. They aren't. Clearly, you would have to try and convey that message to the child. That doesn't mean that I relish the opportunity to do it and welcome my family to treat my child like dirt just so I get the opportunity to teach the lesson.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Crushing blow? Wow.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Crushing blow? Wow.

Yes. It would have been a crushing blow if someone told my DD after months of her practicing and talking non stop about the wedding she was going to be in that she couldn't be in it. She talked about it for a solid year. She didn't shut up about it for at least 6 months after the wedding.

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Crushing blow? Wow.
Yes. It would have been a crushing blow if someone told my DD after months of her practicing and talking non stop about the wedding she was going to be in that she couldn't be in it. She talked about it for a solid year. She didn't shut up about it for at least 6 months after the wedding.

You are adding personal details to this situation that are not there. There would be a big difference in the above scenario of months of practice versus what happened here. There is no indication of any of that at all other than a brief converasation about it and then she changed her mind. Not the same situation as "months of practice".

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Crushing blow? Wow.
Yes. It would have been a crushing blow if someone told my DD after months of her practicing and talking non stop about the wedding she was going to be in that she couldn't be in it. She talked about it for a solid year. She didn't shut up about it for at least 6 months after the wedding.
You are adding personal details to this situation that are not there. There would be a big difference in the above scenario of months of practice versus what happened here. There is no indication of any of that at all other than a brief converasation about it and then she changed her mind. Not the same situation as "months of practice".

She said she was devastated. That should be enough for you, but you don't want to admit that you could be wrong.

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.

Thank you for pointing out the obvious!

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan

Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Crushing blow? Wow.
Yes. It would have been a crushing blow if someone told my DD after months of her practicing and talking non stop about the wedding she was going to be in that she couldn't be in it. She talked about it for a solid year. She didn't shut up about it for at least 6 months after the wedding.
You are adding personal details to this situation that are not there. There would be a big difference in the above scenario of months of practice versus what happened here. There is no indication of any of that at all other than a brief converasation about it and then she changed her mind. Not the same situation as "months of practice".
She said she was devastated. That should be enough for you, but you don't want to admit that you could be wrong.

I would teach my child the DIFFERENCE between life's disappointments, like you didn't make the team or you can't go to the sleepover or you got a C on a test instead of an A versus grandma dying on Christmas Eve, etc.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Then you all went right at Husker. Oh, well you don't have a daughter! You were never a little girl! Wait till you granddaughter is older, blah, blah as if he is not allowed to have an opinion that disagrees with any of yours!

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Then you all went right at Husker. Oh, well you don't have a daughter! You were never a little girl! Wait till you granddaughter is older, blah, blah as if he is not allowed to have an opinion that disagrees with any of yours!

He's been posting on message boards for years & has no problem stating his opinion. The problem is that he believes his opinions are FACTS.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Then you all went right at Husker. Oh, well you don't have a daughter! You were never a little girl! Wait till you granddaughter is older, blah, blah as if he is not allowed to have an opinion that disagrees with any of yours!
He's been posting on message boards for years & has no problem stating his opinion. The problem is that he believes his opinions are FACTS.
flan

Well, that could be, lol. We are ALL pretty opinionated and stubborn! biggrin

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

So, skip the wedding, get tickets to Frozen on Ice and she will have a heck of a lot better time doing that!

flan327 · Itty bitty's Grammy

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Crushing blow? Wow.
Yes. It would have been a crushing blow if someone told my DD after months of her practicing and talking non stop about the wedding she was going to be in that she couldn't be in it. She talked about it for a solid year. She didn't shut up about it for at least 6 months after the wedding.
You are adding personal details to this situation that are not there. There would be a big difference in the above scenario of months of practice versus what happened here. There is no indication of any of that at all other than a brief converasation about it and then she changed her mind. Not the same situation as "months of practice".
She said she was devastated. That should be enough for you, but you don't want to admit that you could be wrong.
I would teach my child the DIFFERENCE between life's disappointments, like you didn't make the team or you can't go to the sleepover or you got a C on a test instead of an A versus grandma dying on Christmas Eve, etc.

Examples 1 and 3 are the result of the child's actions.

Number 2 may or may not be. Was she invited, then the invitation got revoked?

What this little flower-girl wannabe has learned is that grownups, even FAMILY, can't be trusted. That is WHY most of us are upset.

flan

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Look, if she had practiced for MONTHS and then SIL flaked and changed her mind, then that is a different scenario in my opinion. But, that isn't what happened here. If she had done that after practicing and so forth, then yes, that would really cross the line. Changing her mind at this point, not so much/.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

flan327 wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Then you all went right at Husker. Oh, well you don't have a daughter! You were never a little girl! Wait till you granddaughter is older, blah, blah as if he is not allowed to have an opinion that disagrees with any of yours!
He's been posting on message boards for years & has no problem stating his opinion. The problem is that he believes his opinions are FACTS.
flan

There is no "fact" to how this should be handled. This is completely a personal opinion so not sure how that applies here.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Look, if she had practiced for MONTHS and then SIL flaked and changed her mind, then that is a different scenario in my opinion. But, that isn't what happened here. If she had done that after practicing and so forth, then yes, that would really cross the line. Changing her mind at this point, not so much/.

You absolutely do not know that. You are making up your own "facts" to fit the opinion you want to have.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Look, if she had practiced for MONTHS and then SIL flaked and changed her mind, then that is a different scenario in my opinion. But, that isn't what happened here. If she had done that after practicing and so forth, then yes, that would really cross the line. Changing her mind at this point, not so much/.
You absolutely do not know that. You are making up your own "facts" to fit the opinion you want to have.

I didn't add any "facts'. I am not the one saying "months of practice". We don't know. Neither do you know.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Look, if she had practiced for MONTHS and then SIL flaked and changed her mind, then that is a different scenario in my opinion. But, that isn't what happened here. If she had done that after practicing and so forth, then yes, that would really cross the line. Changing her mind at this point, not so much/.
You absolutely do not know that. You are making up your own "facts" to fit the opinion you want to have.
I didn't add any "facts'. I am not the one saying "months of practice". We don't know. Neither do you know.

Based upon the letter, this occurred over time, the child was asked and was excited, and then she was devastated. You are the ones ignoring those facts.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

It's a letter and situation from a person we don't even know. Most likely this is long resolved and here we all are still arguing about it! LOL!

Mellow Momma · Sniff...sniff, sniff. Yay! A Bum!

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.

You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.
You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.

So what's your point? I wouldn't find it DEVASTATING and HEARTBREAKING and earth shattering if a basketball game got cancelled. So, your analogy doesn't work.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Well, mom can always sign her up for 35 years of therapy and an appearance on Oprah.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.
You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.
So what's your point? I wouldn't find it DEVASTATING and HEARTBREAKING and earth shattering if a basketball game got cancelled. So, your analogy doesn't work.

The wedding didn't get cancelled. The child was excluded after being asked to be in it. How would you feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.
You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.
So what's your point? I wouldn't find it DEVASTATING and HEARTBREAKING and earth shattering if a basketball game got cancelled. So, your analogy doesn't work.
The wedding didn't get cancelled. The child was excluded after being asked to be in it. How would you feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place?

You don't think there isn't drama with teens? Lol. We are also taking about a FOUR Year old here, hello. If my FOUR year old didnt make the Basketball team, i don't think i would be falling down in hysterics.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.
You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.
So what's your point? I wouldn't find it DEVASTATING and HEARTBREAKING and earth shattering if a basketball game got cancelled. So, your analogy doesn't work.
The wedding didn't get cancelled. The child was excluded after being asked to be in it. How would you feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place?
You don't think there isn't drama with teens? Lol. We are also taking about a FOUR Year old here, hello. If my FOUR year old didnt make the Basketball team, i don't think i would be falling down in hysterics.

That is not what I asked you. I asked you how you would feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Mellow Momma wrote:
Just because it isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it wouldn't be to someone else. I happen to hate basketball and I can't watch a game on TV or live. But it's important to you and you talk about it all the time. Same thing with the wedding.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious!
flan
Well, when in doubt go in at someone personally. Not sure what talking about basketball has to do with anything. And, btw, if we missed a basketball game, then we miss a game. That is disappointing it isn't DEVASTATING. DEVASTATING is grandma dying on Christmas Eve. That's devastating. This stuff, no.
You just proved my point. What I posted wasnt a personal attack. It was pretty factual. I don't like basketball. You do. You post about it all the time. I happen to think it's great that you have something you and your daughter bond over together - it doesn't matter that it's something that I don't like. Yet, because it is something YOU like and YOU find to be an important part of your life you feel like I went after you personally. I didn't go after you, I just chose something as an example that you cared about and it made it feel different. Because you care about it. Just like this feels different to the OP than it does to you because it's something her child cares about.
So what's your point? I wouldn't find it DEVASTATING and HEARTBREAKING and earth shattering if a basketball game got cancelled. So, your analogy doesn't work.
The wedding didn't get cancelled. The child was excluded after being asked to be in it. How would you feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place?
You don't think there isn't drama with teens? Lol. We are also taking about a FOUR Year old here, hello. If my FOUR year old didnt make the Basketball team, i don't think i would be falling down in hysterics.
That is not what I asked you. I asked you how you would feel if your daughter was kicked off the basketball team for no reason so someone else could take her place.

I answered you. If she was kicked off the team at age FOUR, then I don't think i would be losing any sleep over it.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

So, it's because the kid is 4 that her feelings don't matter? What age do their feelings start to matter?

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

But, if she got kicked off her team now, I would go find her an AAU travel team to play on. Their loss.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
But, if she got kicked off her team now, I would go find her an AAU travel team to play on. Their loss.

I do not believe for a second you would not be upset and pitching a fit if your kid got booted off the basketball team for no reason.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
But, if she got kicked off her team now, I would go find her an AAU travel team to play on. Their loss.
I do not believe for a second you would not be upset and pitching a fit if your kid got booted off the basketball team for no reason.

Is there something you cannot understand about age FOUR? That one's developmental age play in role in responding to life? But, I gave you my answer but now you are going to tell me my answer doesnt' count. evileye

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
But, if she got kicked off her team now, I would go find her an AAU travel team to play on. Their loss.
I do not believe for a second you would not be upset and pitching a fit if your kid got booted off the basketball team for no reason.
Is there something you cannot understand about age FOUR? That one's developmental age play in role in responding to life? But, I gave you my answer but now you are going to tell me my answer doesnt' count.

And I asked you at what age people's feelings start to matter? At what age does it stop being ok to be mean to kids, and treat them like they are people?