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Lady Gaga Snerd


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Dear Abby: Free loading friends
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DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my husband for 11 years. We are financially and emotionally stable. We recently became friendly with another couple who are newly married and not as financially secure as we are. They spend frivolously.

When we go on vacation, they invite themselves along and assume they are staying in our travel trailer without asking (they have their own trailer they could bring). They don't offer to help pay for gas. The last trip we took, the wife cooked only one meal, while I prepared the rest for a three-day trip. This upcoming trip, they haven't offered to bring anything.

We don't mind sharing what we have and helping our friends out, but what we are starting to resent is the assumption that because we make more money, we'll pick up the tab for everything. Are we wrong to feel this way? My husband and I both see this the same way. -- STARTING TO RESENT THEM

DEAR STARTING TO RESENT THEM: It's not wrong to not want to be taken advantage of. This wouldn't be happening if you had established some rules in the beginning, but it isn't too late to do it now.

Call the wife. Tell her what you expect her and her husband to bring on the next trip, and what chores they will be expected to perform. It isn't fair that you are doing all the work and paying for everything while they are on your vacation.

They should provide -- or pay for -- half the groceries, half the gas, and share any housekeeping responsibilities. Ditto if you go to a restaurant. And the next time they tell you they are coming with you on your vacation, don't hesitate or feel guilty when you reply, "We'd like some privacy this time, so it will just be the two of us."http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/2016/2/25/young-moms-feel-pressure-to-succeed

 



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Frozen Sucks!

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I would tell them that all 4 in the one trailer was fun but we prefer to use ours without guests, here is the number for the camp site, call and get a reservation.

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Lady Gaga Snerd


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How do they "invite themselves along" in their trailer? Stop letting them come in your trailer in the first place! Problem solved. Geez.

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lilyofcourse


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Why can't they speak up?

"No, you are not invited."

Simple as that.

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Cheerios4606


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:sigh: or you could call them and tell them up front that this vacation, you and hubby are gonna do it alone. eesh people, why cant anyone figure these things out for themselves?

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Nobody Just Nobody


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They have a trailer of their own. They can bring their own.

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Lawyerlady


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I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

I would tell them that all 4 in the one trailer was fun but we prefer to use ours without guests, here is the number for the camp site, call and get a reservation.

 See, I would tell them all 4 in one trailer is claustrophobic.  biggrin



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Frozen Sucks!

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Lawyerlady wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:

I would tell them that all 4 in the one trailer was fun but we prefer to use ours without guests, here is the number for the camp site, call and get a reservation.

 See, I would tell them all 4 in one trailer is claustrophobic.  biggrin

 That probably is a better approach!  Anyway, people like that are clueless and you have to spell it out to them. If you don't want them going at all, close your trap when you are planning a trip, if they find out about it, tell them no on having them join you.  Actually, since they seem like leeches, I would just tell them no on future trips.



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Lady Gaga Snerd


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lilyofcourse wrote:

Why can't they speak up?

"No, you are not invited."

Simple as that.

 Exactly.  It doesnt matter if you have the room or they have their own trailer or any of those reasons.  You aren't invited.  Period.



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Southern_Belle


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How about not advertising their plans?

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It doesn't sound as if they don't want the friends to come at all, just that they want the friends to pull their own weight- bring their own trailer, pay their own way, and share responsibilities evenly.

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