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Post Info TOPIC: 15 Sexuality Terms That'll Make You Smarter
Lady Gaga Snerd


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15 Sexuality Terms That'll Make You Smarter
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Jughead ©Archie Comics

 

 

Those of us in the LGBTQPUIA2S+ community have grown used to an expanding array of terms to describe us -- clinical, colloquial and otherwise -- but when asked by a friend to define "demisexual" and "lithromantic," I realized I was losing touch and that the "+" following the acronym was taking on more substance by the day.

Ironically enough, it seems that the most diverse set of terms about sexuality comes from the asexual community, like the two above. Once I started to stir the alphabet soup, I realized I couldn't be the only one who needed help. For the record, I'm not saying my confusion means the terms shouldn't exist. I just needed to find a way in.

Fortunately enough, Archie Comics' revamped Jughead characterrecently came out as asexual, just in time for the day when many of us feel socially coerced to express some kind of sexuality. For those of you who fit under that golf umbrella known as heterosexuality, you shouldn't have any lack of options to express yourself, but for those of us who squeeze under the telescoping kind, Valentine's Day is often a reminder of the ways in which we still don't see -- and just as importantly, the rest of society doesn't see -- many accurate representations of our community.

Some may wonder: are labels necessary at all? I think so. Labels can feel validating -- as well as limiting -- but what labels really represent is the fact that most of us want to feel like we belong somewhere. We want others with whom we can connect. More than twenty years ago, social psychologists Roy F. Baumeister and Mark R. Leary sought and found a large body of empirical evidence to support the following:

"...human beings are fundamentally and pervasively motivated by a need to belong, that is, by a strong desire to form and maintain enduring personal attachments."

Besides that most basic need, we use labels for all sorts of reasons so I'm not sure why some people get bent out of shape about the neologisms for sexuality. We stand in front of three hundred different cereals in a grocery store and don't seem distressed that Cheerios are available in Original, Honey Nut, Cinnamon Nut, Cinnamon Burst, Apple Cinnamon, Multigrain, Frosted, Yogurt Burst, Fruity, Oat Cluster Crunch, Banana Nut, Chocolate, Dark Chocolate Crunch, Peanut Butter and even Ancient Grain varieties. I don't know what all of those mean, but I don't care either.

My point is that you don't have to understand every single type of Cheerios -- do you have any idea what a Yogurt Burst is? -- in order to select the kind you like and get on with it.

 

 

2016-02-12-1455240384-4481592-3266508742_16a9f16d58_b.jpg

 

 

 

 

Heart Candy image by SeeMidTN.com (aka Brent) used under CC license

 

 

As for heart candy, Necco cuts somewhere north of 6 billion individual hearts per year, which isn't quite enough for everyone on the planet, but close. So how are candy hearts like sexuality labels? They're both about connecting, about reaching across that great divide of otherness and even if for a moment, risking and sharing what is most precious about all of us: our hearts...and if you feel overwhelmed by all the new terms for sexuality, remember, even Necco has had a few questionable choices, e.g.,YOU ARE GAY. To be fair, they've retired it. They no longer put out HEPCAT or GROOVY either.

So for myself and for those of you who don't understand or even know about the rapidly changing "word world" of sexuality, here's a primer on the subject, using something that is a little easier to understand: heart candy.

[NOTE: You may want to test your own knowledge of sexuality terms BEFORE reading the list with the Perfect Match Quiz I designed.]

I'll state up front that this list is neither as comprehensive nor as nuanced as it could be, so if you still feel you need more, the baton is yours. Run with it...or if you're one of those people who hates multiple choice, here's my advice: stay away from the quiz.

...and the cereal aisle.

Here are the "answers" as I see them. Feel free to add more in the comments below.

 

 

2016-02-12-1455237558-284542-SexualityCandyHeartTable.jpg

 

 

Bottom line, times change. So does the lingo, and it will continue to grow long after these new terms become old, so be a HEPCAT and enjoy it.



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lilyofcourse


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Guess everything has to have a label now.

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flan327


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Some people like labels. They've always been around.

flan

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flan327


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Jughead is asexual?

I'm so thankful that has gotten cleared up...

flan

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Ohfour


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flan327 wrote:

Some people like labels. They've always been around.

flan

I'll remember that next time you shake your head at someone labeling someone else.   



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Bonny22Pye


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My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

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flan327


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Bonny22Pye wrote:

My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

 That's a tough one for me to wrap my mind around as well.

flan



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Bonny22Pye


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flan327 wrote:
Bonny22Pye wrote:

My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

 That's a tough one for me to wrap my mind around as well.

flan

 I think it would be easier if the wife was getting it on with a woman.  Then I could wrap by head around it a bit more.  But I just don't get how a husband could let his wife get railed by another guy.



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lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

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I'm rolling here! Oh my God!



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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

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flan327


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Bonny22Pye wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Bonny22Pye wrote:

My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

 That's a tough one for me to wrap my mind around as well.

flan

 I think it would be easier if the wife was getting it on with a woman.  Then I could wrap by head around it a bit more.  But I just don't get how a husband could let his wife get railed by another guy.

 It's just human nature to compare things.

Is there usually an emotional component to the outside relationships? I'm sure it varies from couple to couple, but I wonder.

flan



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weltschmerz


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Bonny22Pye wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Bonny22Pye wrote:

My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

 That's a tough one for me to wrap my mind around as well.

flan

 I think it would be easier if the wife was getting it on with a woman.  Then I could wrap by head around it a bit more.  But I just don't get how a husband could let his wife get railed by another guy.

 Why would that be easier?



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weltschmerz


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Is it easier if the husband gets it on with another man?

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huskerbb


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They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

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Bonny22Pye


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weltschmerz wrote:
Bonny22Pye wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Bonny22Pye wrote:

My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.

 That's a tough one for me to wrap my mind around as well.

flan

 I think it would be easier if the wife was getting it on with a woman.  Then I could wrap by head around it a bit more.  But I just don't get how a husband could let his wife get railed by another guy.

 Why would that be easier?

 Because she is attracted to something that a man can't provide.  Maybe she's bi or on her way to gayville.  



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flan327


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huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan



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weltschmerz


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flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 .......and small.



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Ohfour


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flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 



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huskerbb


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flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 I inhabit an awesome world.  Just got back from another weekend in Vegas.  It was great.  



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huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 I inhabit an awesome world.  Just got back from another weekend in Vegas.  It was great.  

 Right???



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weltschmerz


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huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 I inhabit an awesome world.  Just got back from another weekend in Vegas.  It was great.  

 

Lol! That's supposed to mean something?

So you're a gambler. Big whoop. That's not awesome.



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huskerbb


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???? Where did I ever say I was a gambler?????

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You couldn't pay me to go to Vegas.

But, yes, if money is the most important thing in your life, I guess trips to Vegas are important.

flan

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flan327 wrote:

You couldn't pay me to go to Vegas.

But, yes, if money is the most important thing in your life, I guess trips to Vegas are important.

flan

 LOL!!!!  So anyone who ever takes a vacation it now automatically means that money is the "most important" thing in their life??

 

That is a flat out stupid statement. 



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flan327


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Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 

 Because I'm happy? Because I don't turn on my friends? Because I can think for myself?

flan



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huskerbb


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flan327 wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 

 Because I'm happy? Because I don't turn on my friends? Because I can think for myself?

flan

 Why do you think those things only apply to you, snowflake? 



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Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
flan327


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huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 

 Because I'm happy? Because I don't turn on my friends? Because I can think for myself?

flan

 Why do you think those things only apply to you, snowflake? 

 Not talking to you, big guy...

flan



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Ohfour


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flan327 wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 

 Because I'm happy? Because I don't turn on my friends? Because I can think for myself?

flan

 Oh, hun, you turned on your "friends". In the worst imaginable way. You clearly get off on others misery...



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Frozen Sucks!

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All these people with the free expression of "love" remind me of the hippies. It comes back to bite you in the butt, and when they wake up and realize that is not what they want anymore, they are left to rebuild their lives. History repeating itself.

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lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

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All those terms.

Does anyone know what PRIVATE MATTER means anymore?

It's ridiculous.



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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

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My husbands former writing partner is now in a Polyamourus relationship. Both himself and his wife have outside relationships. I just don't get it.
- Bonny22Pye

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I "get it" on an intellectual level. And if that's what works for people in the relationship, great for them.

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Is it easier if the husband gets it on with another man?
- weltschmerz

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I think it's easier for some outsiders to understand it if the extramarital partner is same sex, because a spouse in a heterosexual marriage or relationship obviously can't provide same-sex, sex. So they see "well, that's something they can't get at home".

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flan327


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Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
Ohfour wrote:
flan327 wrote:
huskerbb wrote:

They forgot the technical term "fvcked in the head"--it's a general term which covers many of those.

 The world you choose to inhabit is so pathetically petty.

flan

 Yours is emphatically more pathetic. 

 Because I'm happy? Because I don't turn on my friends? Because I can think for myself?

flan

 Oh, hun, you turned on your "friends". In the worst imaginable way. You clearly get off on others misery...

 Are you still talking about Tig?

"...the worst imaginable way?" If you have something to say, say it.

flan



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huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:

You couldn't pay me to go to Vegas.

But, yes, if money is the most important thing in your life, I guess trips to Vegas are important.

flan

 LOL!!!!  So anyone who ever takes a vacation it now automatically means that money is the "most important" thing in their life??

 

That is a flat out stupid statement. 

 And yet she goes to Hawaii every year.  Pay her no mind.



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I love Vegas. The energy is incredible. Love, love it.

I think vacations are important to one's mental health. And the time bonding with family is priceless.

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Only certain people are allowed to go on vacation to certain places and then it's ok. Other people going on vacation to anywhere but Hawaii certainly it must be all about the money...lol

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flan327


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Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:

You couldn't pay me to go to Vegas.

But, yes, if money is the most important thing in your life, I guess trips to Vegas are important.

flan

 LOL!!!!  So anyone who ever takes a vacation it now automatically means that money is the "most important" thing in their life??

 

That is a flat out stupid statement. 

 And yet she goes to Hawaii every year.  Pay her no mind.

 Every other year. We work hard & I'm very grateful for the opportunity.

flan



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flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:
huskerbb wrote:
flan327 wrote:

You couldn't pay me to go to Vegas.

But, yes, if money is the most important thing in your life, I guess trips to Vegas are important.

flan

 LOL!!!!  So anyone who ever takes a vacation it now automatically means that money is the "most important" thing in their life??

 

That is a flat out stupid statement. 

 And yet she goes to Hawaii every year.  Pay her no mind.

 Every other year. We work hard & I'm very grateful for the opportunity.

flan

 So you get to go on vacation without money being the "most important" thing in your life but no one else does? You've proven my stuoid statement comment and also proven once again how hypocritical you are.



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flan327


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This was what you said, husker:

I inhabit an awesome world. Just got back from another weekend in Vegas. It was great.

You could have mentioned NUMEROUS other reasons why your world was "awesome," but you chose A TRIP TO VEGAS.

And I'm the hypocrite?!

flan

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huskerbb


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flan327 wrote:

This was what you said, husker:

I inhabit an awesome world. Just got back from another weekend in Vegas. It was great.

You could have mentioned NUMEROUS other reasons why your world was "awesome," but you chose A TRIP TO VEGAS.

And I'm the hypocrite?!

flan

 So what?  Vegas is awesome.  I got to spend a weekend alone with my wife.  We had a lot of fun.  Why is that such a problem for you?  Do you not have fun on vacation?  

 



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Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
just Czech


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I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with a trip to Vegas. Scratching my head on this one.

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Ohfour


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flan327 wrote:

This was what you said, husker:

I inhabit an awesome world. Just got back from another weekend in Vegas. It was great.

You could have mentioned NUMEROUS other reasons why your world was "awesome," but you chose A TRIP TO VEGAS.

And I'm the hypocrite?!

flan

 And you think we are the ones obsessed with money. Im not sure if its jealously or what, but you criticize everyone that even mentions spending money. I think you probably need to work some things out, because youre coming across as quite the miserable biddy...



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Ohfour


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just Czech wrote:

I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with a trip to Vegas. Scratching my head on this one.

 Nothing is wrong. Its another lame reason to nitpick...



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Nobody Just Nobody


Rib-it! Rrrib-it!

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I need a vacation. We were going to take a staycation this week until SS messed it up.

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huskerbb


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I'm going to bet my trip to Vegas cost less than a trip to Hawaii.

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Lawyerlady


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just Czech wrote:

I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with a trip to Vegas. Scratching my head on this one.

 Well, except for the epidemic of syphilis striking the city - absolutely nothing.  biggrin



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LawyerLady

 

I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. 
huskerbb


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Lawyerlady wrote:
just Czech wrote:

I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with a trip to Vegas. Scratching my head on this one.

 Well, except for the epidemic of syphilis striking the city - absolutely nothing.  biggrin

 I read that.  Rather amusing.



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I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.

 

Well, I could agree with you--but then we'd both be wrong.
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

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Lawyerlady wrote:
just Czech wrote:

I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with a trip to Vegas. Scratching my head on this one.

 Well, except for the epidemic of syphilis striking the city - absolutely nothing.  biggrin

 Was that before or after Husker was there?

evileyewink



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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
lilyofcourse


My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

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As for vacation, a person plans and prepares for things that are important to them.



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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
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