TOTALLY GEEKED!

Tinydancer wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Wth?!
TD, how do you know RTL isn't a time lord? He's always said that he is, maybe he is telling the truth.
If he is or isn't, what do you care?

I happen to agree with several things he said.

RTL, please don't leave us because some people here are rude.

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 I'll bet money he's not a real time lord.

I don't care if he thinks he's bozo the clown. 

If he was going to leave because of rude people he would have left a long time ago.

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 If you don't care what RTL thinks of himself, why bother to question him instead of taking him at face value? 

 

Have you considered that rude people contribute to  cumulative negativity? I feel that everyone has a point when they can no longer tolerate certain attitudes and then they will simply leave the board. 

It wouldn't be the first time that happened.

have fun arguing endlessly with the same handful of people. 

 

 

Tinydancer wrote:

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Are you blaming me because this board gets contentious? I'm sure your friend flan contributes nothing to that right?

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 I believe you misunderstand my position. 

I was suggesting that everyone reflect on their own behavior and how it might affect the general atmosphere of this board.

 

Why are you accusing me of being friends with flan?? 

Are you implying that I am not expressing my own thoughts and feelings?

I will clear that up for you. I rarely pm with anyone on this board. My thoughts and opinions are my own and I'm not on anyone's "side".

 

And to answer your question, yes. I do think you contribute your share of unpleasantness to this board, but you're hardly the only one doing so. Does that make you feel better? Going along with the nastiness is easier if everyone else is doing it?

 

I didn't tell you how to post. I told you what I think about the way you post.

You can post anything you want just stop telling me about my posts because I will post anything I want. I'm done with this conversation.

Tangerine wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Wth?!
TD, how do you know RTL isn't a time lord? He's always said that he is, maybe he is telling the truth.
If he is or isn't, what do you care?

I happen to agree with several things he said.

RTL, please don't leave us because some people here are rude.

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 I'll bet money he's not a real time lord.

I don't care if he thinks he's bozo the clown. 

If he was going to leave because of rude people he would have left a long time ago.

---

 If you don't care what RTL thinks of himself, why bother to question him instead of taking him at face value? 

 

Have you considered that rude people contribute to  cumulative negativity? I feel that everyone has a point when they can no longer tolerate certain attitudes and then they will simply leave the board. 

It wouldn't be the first time that happened.

have fun arguing endlessly with the same handful of people. 

 

 

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 Lexxy  Tangerine

Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Wth?!
TD, how do you know RTL isn't a time lord? He's always said that he is, maybe he is telling the truth.
If he is or isn't, what do you care?

I happen to agree with several things he said.

RTL, please don't leave us because some people here are rude.

---

 I'll bet money he's not a real time lord.

I don't care if he thinks he's bozo the clown. 

If he was going to leave because of rude people he would have left a long time ago.

---

 If you don't care what RTL thinks of himself, why bother to question him instead of taking him at face value? 

 

Have you considered that rude people contribute to  cumulative negativity? I feel that everyone has a point when they can no longer tolerate certain attitudes and then they will simply leave the board. 

It wouldn't be the first time that happened.

have fun arguing endlessly with the same handful of people. 

 

 

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 Tang, I do not think this is fair.  Really?  He claims to be a Time Lord so we should take that at face value? I realize he is well liked, but if it was anyone else - that would just be seen as nuts.  

And it's one thing to claim it in fun once in a while and quite another to do it during a serious post where you are basically slamming an entire group of people.  

I, for one, have never said a word against him, but I don't really understand the group love, either.   

 

You are correct that the continuous negativity wears. 

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 Yeah. I know. I've just always considered it to be his posting style. No one ever questioned it before. 

Why was it only brought up when he offered a criticism that many other people agreed with?

That's what made it seem like a personal attack to me.

I rather like RTL's style and he comes across as a very nice person.

 

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 Well, he doesn't post here often, and he doesn't always throw in the Time Lord stuff, so it could easily be that she isn't familiar with it.  

 

But that's exactly it - how is asking a question an attack?  I found his post to be more negative and attacking than hers. 

Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Tinydancer wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Wth?!
TD, how do you know RTL isn't a time lord? He's always said that he is, maybe he is telling the truth.
If he is or isn't, what do you care?

I happen to agree with several things he said.

RTL, please don't leave us because some people here are rude.

---

 I'll bet money he's not a real time lord.

I don't care if he thinks he's bozo the clown. 

If he was going to leave because of rude people he would have left a long time ago.

---

 If you don't care what RTL thinks of himself, why bother to question him instead of taking him at face value? 

 

Have you considered that rude people contribute to  cumulative negativity? I feel that everyone has a point when they can no longer tolerate certain attitudes and then they will simply leave the board. 

It wouldn't be the first time that happened.

have fun arguing endlessly with the same handful of people. 

 

 

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 Tang, I do not think this is fair.  Really?  He claims to be a Time Lord so we should take that at face value? I realize he is well liked, but if it was anyone else - that would just be seen as nuts.  

And it's one thing to claim it in fun once in a while and quite another to do it during a serious post where you are basically slamming an entire group of people.  

I, for one, have never said a word against him, but I don't really understand the group love, either.   

 

You are correct that the continuous negativity wears. 

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 Yeah. I know. I've just always considered it to be his posting style. No one ever questioned it before. 

Why was it only brought up when he offered a criticism that many other people agreed with?

That's what made it seem like a personal attack to me.

I rather like RTL's style and he comes across as a very nice person.

 

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 Well, he doesn't post here often, and he doesn't always throw in the Time Lord stuff, so it could easily be that she isn't familiar with it.  

 

But that's exactly it - how is asking a question an attack?  I found his post to be more negative and attacking than hers.  

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 Because the question was meant to be insulting. rather like if I were to say, "do you really consider yourself a female?" to you or another board member who has stated that she is female.

 Would that be considered rude/a personal attack?

Thats just how it came across to me. 

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 Except females actually exist and Time Lords do not. 

Lawyerlady wrote:

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I would find "you consider yourself a lawyer?" to be an insult. I would not find "you consider yourself to be a smurf?" an insult.

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 I don't recall you ever claiming to be a smurf.

Look, I don't know what RTL really thinks of himself. I do know that he has consistently presented himself in a certain way. 

 

Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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I would find "you consider yourself a lawyer?" to be an insult. I would not find "you consider yourself to be a smurf?" an insult.

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 I don't recall you ever claiming to be a smurf.

Look, I don't know what RTL really thinks of himself. I do know that he has consistently presented himself in a certain way. 

 

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 Yes, and as I said - I don't get the group love.  

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I think it is more group tolerance of an unusual individual. How RTL presents himself is his business just as it is everyone else's business how they present themselves. 

Tangerine wrote:

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just Czech wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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I would find "you consider yourself a lawyer?" to be an insult. I would not find "you consider yourself to be a smurf?" an insult.

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 I don't recall you ever claiming to be a smurf.

Look, I don't know what RTL really thinks of himself. I do know that he has consistently presented himself in a certain way. 

 

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 Yes, and as I said - I don't get the group love.  

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I think it is more group tolerance of an unusual individual. How RTL presents himself is his business just as it is everyone else's business how they present themselves. 

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 Why is it "group love" when I say that I enjoy RTL's posting style and presence?

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 Because it's not just you.  A bunch of people just jumped in to defend him from a question.  

I find that he rarely posts, and when he does, although he speaks very calmly and civilly, he often is complaining about the board or people on it, or distinguishing himself from the posters as somehow better.  And I just really don't find it to be very nice when people who rarely post or contribute are always complaining about the people that do. It gets my back up no matter who they are directing it at.  He's not the only one that does it.  Someone who hasn't posted for months will long in simply to swipe at people and say they are "sick of the negativity and bickering" when they haven't even been on the board.  And I'm not talking about you, this is in general.

Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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just Czech wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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Tangerine wrote:

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Lawyerlady wrote:

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I would find "you consider yourself a lawyer?" to be an insult. I would not find "you consider yourself to be a smurf?" an insult.

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 I don't recall you ever claiming to be a smurf.

Look, I don't know what RTL really thinks of himself. I do know that he has consistently presented himself in a certain way. 

 

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 Yes, and as I said - I don't get the group love.  

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I think it is more group tolerance of an unusual individual. How RTL presents himself is his business just as it is everyone else's business how they present themselves. 

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 Why is it "group love" when I say that I enjoy RTL's posting style and presence?

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 Because it's not just you.  A bunch of people just jumped in to defend him from a question.  

I find that he rarely posts, and when he does, although he speaks very calmly and civilly, he often is complaining about the board or people on it, or distinguishing himself from the posters as somehow better.  And I just really don't find it to be very nice when people who rarely post or contribute are always complaining about the people that do. It gets my back up no matter who they are directing it at.  He's not the only one that does it.  Someone who hasn't posted for months will long in simply to swipe at people and say they are "sick of the negativity and bickering" when they haven't even been on the board.  And I'm not talking about you, this is in general.

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 It definitely did get my back up that he was bashing this board. Also asking a question was called a "vicious attack". If everyone can question my way of posting I sure as hell can question his.

I waffle on if a business should have to bake a cake for religious ceremony they don't agree with because of this board.

There is a pattern to the fights, and every single one of us pay our parts.

Poster A posts.

Poster B takes exception.

Then a few posters jumps in to defend Poster A.

Then a few others jump in to defend Poster B.

And then the ones who scold the first group start.

And then the ones who scold the second group starts.

And then the "other boards never" group chimes in.

Then there are 4 pages of fighting over something 2 adults posted and if all the other people had just left it alone, it most likely would have died after a couple posts from both Posters A and B.

The dog pile tends to exacerbate the situation.

I've also seen a ton of times in which a poster will come on to a thread after the fighting has stopped, and start it up again.

It's happened on this thread.

Lily, you've been around long enough to know this happens on EVERY single message board.

flan

How would you (general you) suggest RTL deliver constructive criticism?

Other posters have commented on the frequent bickering, OF WHICH I AM GUILTY. So when RTL points it out, he is not expressing a new opinion.

From what he has posted in the past, he works at a fairly unrewarding job, finances are tight & he has health issues. So he indulges in some harmless role playing.

Maybe he's actually writing a thesis on message board behavior.

flan

Lawyerlady wrote:

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lilyofcourse wrote:

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There is a pattern to the fights, and every single one of us pay our parts.

Poster A posts.

Poster B takes exception.

Then a few posters jumps in to defend Poster A.

Then a few others jump in to defend Poster B.

And then the ones who scold the first group start.

And then the ones who scold the second group starts.

And then the "other boards never" group chimes in.

Then there are 4 pages of fighting over something 2 adults posted and if all the other people had just left it alone, it most likely would have died after a couple posts from both Posters A and B.

The dog pile tends to exacerbate the situation.

I've also seen a ton of times in which a poster will come on to a thread after the fighting has stopped, and start it up again.

It's happened on this thread.

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 Sums it up well.

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 Human nature & group behavior? Not surprising, imo.

flan

I don't complain about it. And I try my best not to get into it. But I think there are some people here who just hate each other so much that ANYTHING turns into an argument. I know there are people here who get on my nerves. And like LL said sometimes it depends on who is asking the question. Usually I try to skip over it if I feel like it's going to end up in bickering. No, I'm not perfect. But I do recognize that I have triggers and that no matter how many times someone asks me to prove something or answer something I am not obligated to do so. I am not obligated to be pulled into the fight. I know it's hard not to get the last word and to "be right".

Well, in all honesty, I was really loving LGS's menu thread until the fighting started there. That was one thread with no fighting and that was long and open for discussion. But again, I think posters who don't like each other took offense to things.

I also find it rather funny and odd that some posters claim to be ignoring others and then start whole posts to bait the other person. Maybe we should just be brutally honest and have a WWF thread.

Yep.

yeah I have to respectfully disagree with you on that. To me it seems things blow over or stop, but then they pop up again on another thread. Someone says something half passive aggressive, and then it goes full escalate 0 to 60 in 2 posts and the fight is simply continued on from the original thread.

Many times I read the first post of a thread, then jump to the last page to contribute only to see the thread has bounced way over to a different topic or fight that is a continuation from somewhere else. I find it extremely hard to participate to be honest. :'(