Dear Amy: I frequently work at a busy cafe in my home town, which is also a beehive of activity because it is a college town. I feel so lucky to have a place to go where I can nurse a cup of coffee, use the WiFi and get out of the house for a while. I am self-employed, and sometimes I go a little stir-crazy in my house or car.
The only problem with my routine is that I often see people I know; these encounters can soak up literally hours of my day. I don’t blame others for being friendly, but I obviously need ways to indicate that I’m trying to work. Do you have any ideas for how to do this without being rude?
Working Hard, Hardly Working
Working Hard, Hardly Working: This is an increasingly common issue, as more of us head to cafes and coffee shops to do our work (I’m sitting in one now, in fact).
Noise-canceling headphones can work well to basically create a cone of silence; they are also a visual indication to other people that you are otherwise engaged.
You are also going to have to be a little more disciplined during your encounters. If you say, “It is so nice to run into you, but I’m up against a deadline. Can we make a time to catch up later?” it will indicate to your pals that you’re happy to see them, but now isn’t a good time.
I’m sure readers will weigh in with additional suggestions.
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
So she hogs a table hours on end in a busy coffee house? I hate when people do that. When I go for coffee I can never relax inside and enjoy it because people are all spread out on all the tables with whatever they are working on. They don't just occupy one spot. They take up a whole table where 4 people could sit. Maybe her friends are just looking for a seat.
I am a little confused. Is she WORKING at the coffee shop or there drinking coffee? Why is she nursing a cup of coffee and using WiFi when she is supposed to be working? And, if she is working you simply say "excuse me" i need to get back to work'.
So she hogs a table hours on end in a busy coffee house? I hate when people do that. When I go for coffee I can never relax inside and enjoy it because people are all spread out on all the tables with whatever they are working on. They don't just occupy one spot. They take up a whole table where 4 people could sit. Maybe her friends are just looking for a seat.
So this. I have zero compassion for her. She is rude to hog space for hours at a busy shop.
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
So she hogs a table hours on end in a busy coffee house? I hate when people do that. When I go for coffee I can never relax inside and enjoy it because people are all spread out on all the tables with whatever they are working on. They don't just occupy one spot. They take up a whole table where 4 people could sit. Maybe her friends are just looking for a seat.
So this. I have zero compassion for her. She is rude to hog space for hours at a busy shop.
And complain about the busyness and that people talk to her!
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
So she hogs a table hours on end in a busy coffee house? I hate when people do that. When I go for coffee I can never relax inside and enjoy it because people are all spread out on all the tables with whatever they are working on. They don't just occupy one spot. They take up a whole table where 4 people could sit. Maybe her friends are just looking for a seat.
So this. I have zero compassion for her. She is rude to hog space for hours at a busy shop.
And complain about the busyness and that people talk to her!
The Horror!
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
She needs to do her work at the library. Thays what it is there for. The coffee shop isn't meant to be an office for anyone. If you want to sit and nurse one cup of coffee with a free refil for a few hours and complain about the atmosphere, I don't think the owners will mind when you move on.
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Out of all the lies I have told, "just kidding" is my favorite !
There are many establishments designed specifically for customers to sit, read, have coffee, work (since wifi is provided). For me, this is about personal boundaries and her needing to learn how to set them.
There are many establishments designed specifically for customers to sit, read, have coffee, work (since wifi is provided). For me, this is about personal boundaries and her needing to learn how to set them.
Well she also needs to accept the fact that if she is out in public where people she knows may be as well she is going to be interrupted. If she doesn't want to be interrupted, she needs to go elsewhere.
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
I was thinking she just hated people because she works in the public.
Cause I can totally understand that.
People suck.
But this chic is WHY people suck.
This is the life you chose.
Shut up complaining.
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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
I agree with putting earbuds in. It does offer the heads up that you are not open for chit chat. For the reaaaaly chatty friend that happens upon you, I would say to go ahead and chat for five minutes and then offer a "you know what, I love talking with you but I really do need to get back to this. How bout we get together next week sometime?"
Or, work at a coffee place not so close to everyone she knows?
This. I tried to work at Starbucks once and between the loud music and people, I couldn't get anything done. On my work from home days I work from home, where it is quiet.
I had a whiney ex bf that would get pissed when our conversation was interrupted at the karaoke bar that we frequented. He would get pizzy and tap my arm ....helloooooo??
Um dude people know us here and are going to speak to us. I didn't care about what he was rambling on about most of the time anyhow 😀
I had a whiney ex bf that would get pissed when our conversation was interrupted at the karaoke bar that we frequented. He would get pizzy and tap my arm ....helloooooo?? Um dude people know us here and are going to speak to us. I didn't care about what he was rambling on about most of the time anyhow 😀
Which, of course, is why he is an ex!
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
Problem is unless they are charging by the hour or $30 for a cup of coffee, they will not survive. They need revenue to pay the bills.
Coffee is free. You can either get a membership which entitles you to use them any time they are open, or $25 a day. They also rent out conference rooms. For now, they seem to be doing OK...
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America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...
Problem is unless they are charging by the hour or $30 for a cup of coffee, they will not survive. They need revenue to pay the bills.
Coffee is free. You can either get a membership which entitles you to use them any time they are open, or $25 a day. They also rent out conference rooms. For now, they seem to be doing OK...
I am a little confused. Is she WORKING at the coffee shop or there drinking coffee? Why is she nursing a cup of coffee and using WiFi when she is supposed to be working? And, if she is working you simply say "excuse me" i need to get back to work'.
LGS, I actually read it that way myself. I went back and read it again; she does call it 'work', but to me nursing a cup of coffee and using WIFI is taking a break from work, not working...
Problem is unless they are charging by the hour or $30 for a cup of coffee, they will not survive. They need revenue to pay the bills.
Coffee is free. You can either get a membership which entitles you to use them any time they are open, or $25 a day. They also rent out conference rooms. For now, they seem to be doing OK...
Proving my point, Hear, more crow for you.
I can't hheeaaaarrrrr yooouuuuu!!!!!!
__________________
America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...
Problem is unless they are charging by the hour or $30 for a cup of coffee, they will not survive. They need revenue to pay the bills.
Coffee is free. You can either get a membership which entitles you to use them any time they are open, or $25 a day. They also rent out conference rooms. For now, they seem to be doing OK...
Proving my point, Hear, more crow for you.
I can't hheeaaaarrrrr yooouuuuu!!!!!!
And I Love you! where are we going on vaca this year???
__________________
Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
There was a place where I used to live that was similar. You could lease an office and there were conference rooms for use, a common lobby/waiting room, and a shared admin/receptionist. I thought it was a great concept. Small businesses and start ups got the benefit of the nice building and ammenidies without having to take on all the costs alone.
Problem is unless they are charging by the hour or $30 for a cup of coffee, they will not survive. They need revenue to pay the bills.
Coffee is free. You can either get a membership which entitles you to use them any time they are open, or $25 a day. They also rent out conference rooms. For now, they seem to be doing OK...
Proving my point, Hear, more crow for you.
I can't hheeaaaarrrrr yooouuuuu!!!!!!
And I Love you! where are we going on vaca this year???
Bora Bora???? Lol!
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America guarantees equal opportunity, not equal outcome...