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Post Info TOPIC: Dear Abby: Lax Rules At Grandma's
Lawyerlady


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RE: Dear Abby: Lax Rules At Grandma's
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Fort Worth Mom wrote:

LOL!

LL, tell your Mom you refused to buy Jojo a car for her birthday.wink

 We actually discussed a car for DD13 when she gets old enough, and I told her my plan was to give her my car, but she could always get me a new car when DD13 gets mine!  She wasn't buying it.  She said she bought me two cars when I was young and that was enough.  Can't argue with that, really.

 

My mother plans on retiring next year, and says she wants to get the kids big things this year b/c she won't have as much money starting next year. 



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Cheerios4606


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We do that in our house too. We give the kid their first car, but they have to pay for insurance. After they wreck that one, they are on their own and hafta get their own car with their own money. It has worked real well so far.

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flan327 wrote:

And you will tell me when I can start shopping for baby gifts, right? Right?? LOL

flan

 YES!



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chef


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flan327 wrote:
Lawyerlady wrote:

My mother purposely buys my children gifts that I refuse to get them.

 DS2 hates bubbles and Play-Doh.

Kids NEED both those things!

flan

 DS spends a lot of time at his grandma's. He loves Play-Doh. She didn't want it in her house. Funny thing - a couple weeks ago, there was a Play-Doh set on her floor. I asked what's up with the Play-Doh. She said DS wanted it and she couldn't say no. Uh huh, lol!



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flan327


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Play-Doh encourages creativity & is great for developing fine motor skills.

PLUS...it's FUN and it smells good!

flan

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chef


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All I ask of people that watch DS - family or not - is that they keep him safe. I understand that he's rambunctious and may get injured. I won't blame who ever is watching him unless the injury was a direct result of them being negligent.

We do have certain rules we expect to be followed. One such rule is that he does NOT get punished if he has an accident. It's fine to ask him to help clean it up. It is not fine to yell at him or belittle him for having an accident. Simply get it cleaned up and remind him to go to the potty when he has to go and to go right away instead of waiting. Rules such as these are in place to give DS security in knowing that he is loved and it's ok to not be perfect.

Our families and friends are fairly aligned with us values-wise so discussions about rules are very rare. We did have to have a discussion with FIL about teasing DS. FIL tends to go too far and, at that time, DS wasn't old enough to understand what teasing is. He thought his grandpa was serious and started crying. FIL, to his credit, was ashamed of himself and comforted DS. Nowadays, DS will just call you a doggie butt if you piss him off.

Screen time, sweets, bed time, that kind of stuff just isn't on our radar. DS will tell you to play with him when he wants you to play with him. He's a vocal, assertive child. He eats healthy and will often ask for a salad so it's not a big deal if he has a day where he eats too many sweets. Bed time is up to whoever is watching him if he's there overnight. His bedtime at home is 10 during DH's workweek and whenever on the weekends since that's what works for us.

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lilyofcourse


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My parents gave Caitlyn a car without saying a word to me.

I was a bit peeved but then I reminded them that they had 4 other grandkids to get cars for.

And they have.

But the deal is, they find it, make the down payment and sign for it, and the kid pays the payments, insurance and every thing else thar goes with a car.

It was the same when I got a car that was mine.


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Charley Harper
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My parents buy my nephew all kinds of stuff my sister would never buy. Sister's rule is, they can buy him whatever they want but it stays at grandma and grandpa's house.

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flan327 wrote:

Play-Doh encourages creativity & is great for developing fine motor skills.

PLUS...it's FUN and it smells good!

flan

 DS loves all the accessories. His most recent acquisition is some animal-shaped cookie cutters. He likes making animal sounds as he used the different cutters.

He has a Play-Doh burger press. I get fed multicolored burgers.



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FNW


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The boys were never really into playdough. They played with it outside, but always just mixed all the colors together and rolled it into balls. What is it about boys and their balls?

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lilyofcourse


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My kids loved it but I can't stand the smell of it.

They got new pots of it all the time.

Legos were my arch nemesis.

We still have legos.



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Charley Harper
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FNW wrote:

The boys were never really into playdough. They played with it outside, but always just mixed all the colors together and rolled it into balls. What is it about boys and their balls?

 That's DS. He has a shoebox-sized plastic tub of Play-Doh. It's some weird shade of blue/green with bits of orange, purple, and yellow here and there. He got upset for half a second that he couldn't separate the colors once he mixed them then moved on and thoroughly smushed them all together.

He has a passionate love of balls. Begs for them every time he sees them. Has at least 200 (not a typo!) bouncy balls littering his grandma's backyard. I think he's up to 6 of the giant balls from Walmart.

 

Lily - DS has a large Lego tub. We recently ran the Legos through a wash cycle in the washer to clean them. He was amused and let me know the second the washer was done. I should've took a pic of him getting the Legos out of the washer.



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lilyofcourse


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Oh my gosh, about 4 years ago we gave away 2 rolling, full size tool boxes and 5 extra large tubs of Legos and bionacle pieces, complete with the books to put the different sets together.

And we still have legos.

Why? Because Jesse still buys them.

But I guess that's ok.

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Charley Harper
flan327


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You never outgrow Legos!

flan

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FNW


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#2 loves to build with legos. #1 could care less. He's more into balls. And now video games. He's an obsessive-compulsive personality.

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Cheerios4606


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My three boys are 29, 19 and 12 right now. All three love legos. Do the math on how many years I have been dealing with AND WILL STILL BE DEALING WITH legos. I hate them.

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Ohfour


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LOL! 2 Christmases ago, Sweetness was pulling ornaments off of the tree and playing with them. When DD told her to NOT do that, I said, "Leave her alone, she's not hurting anything". Both DD's and DS's jaws dropped. They said ARE YOU SERIOUS? We would have gotten into so much trouble.

Yeah, you would have. But Sweetness can do whatever she wants! HAHAHAHA!

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Cheerios4606


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hahahaha!

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lilyofcourse


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That always drove me crazy!

Having different rules at the different houses are one thing, but when my mom immediately told my kids they did not have to do whatever I just said, it made me so mad.

I think that has been the biggest fight.




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Charley Harper
Ohfour


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lilyofcourse wrote:

That always drove me crazy!

Having different rules at the different houses are one thing, but when my mom immediately told my kids they did not have to do whatever I just said, it made me so mad.

I think that has been the biggest fight.


It's not that DD cared that Sweetness did it, she thought I would be mad about it...

Nope.  Let her play...biggrin 



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FNW


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My parents let my boys get away with more than they used to allow me to get away with.

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Ohfour


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FNW wrote:

My parents let my boys get away with more than they used to allow me to get away with.

Absolutely!  That's what we are for! 



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lilyofcourse


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Oh, for sure, my parents, well, mom, was way more strict on my brother and I than on the grandkids.

And that's fine.

Dad wasn't that strict.

I mean, we had water fights in the house, so it was never very strict at home.



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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.

Charley Harper
Lindley


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lilyofcourse wrote:

That always drove me crazy!

Having different rules at the different houses are one thing, but when my mom immediately told my kids they did not have to do whatever I just said, it made me so mad.

I think that has been the biggest fight.


 That made me mad to! if I said no my mil would get on to me. I spoil my grandkids but their parents rules I abide with. 



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