TOTALLY GEEKED!

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

How Old for Teens to Date? What are your rules?

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Wow. Didnt expect to be attacked. Alrighty then.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Monday 4th of September 2017 03:59:34 PM

No ****. Our girls are different than boys. have you all not learned anything from the liberal mindset of choosing their own gender? Yikes!

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I agree with LL.

And before you get offended, remember I have a girl and 2 boys as well.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
You make a lot of assumptions about my life and parenting based on a few comments so carry on!

Good grief. Can't anyone even have a discussion without you getting all defensive and mad? I really want to understand why you expect so much of other boys that you don't of your own?

You've been posting about your kids a long time, and the plain fact is that you have a pretty lenient parenting style with your boys.

And yes, girls are different, but there has to be some balance.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Wow. Didnt expect to be attacked. Alrighty then.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Monday 4th of September 2017 03:59:34 PM
No ****. Our girls are different than boys. have you all not learned anything from the liberal mindset of choosing their own gender? Yikes!

She wasn't attacked. She was asked questions, which she has chosen not to answer. If she doesn't want to help people understand her viewpoint, then they are not going to.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

hmm Well DD will never date in my life time. There it is! confuse furious

Of course she will date. I have no issue with that but I have standards to pass on to her that I will not deviate from such as a boy does not pull into the driveway and honk the horn. NO, he must come to the door and be respective to me and DD. NO HONKING!

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Lawyerlady wrote:
Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Good gosh.
I think people are really trying to understand. You said you didn't even know your sons were dating until you came home and found them cuddling on the couch. What would your reaction been if that was your daughter?

All the freedoms you seem to allow your sons make them the boys you now seem concerned about your daughter dating. Do you know if your sons took a flower to any of their first dates since you didn't even know they were dating?

I'm actually more curious about why you judge the boys your daughter dates in ways that you don't judge your own sons.

I know I am really late to the party but this is a very valid post. Your boys could be snuggling on the sofa the first time you met their girlfiends & you were ok, but how would you, or her dad feel if it was your daughter necking on the couch when you walked in?

And great second part, I'm sure there are some parents out there who may or may not be judging your sons. Fairly or not, for coming home to find them tangled up with their daughters.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

I didn't say whether i was OK or not OK. That is just how that happened. Sitting on the couch beside each other isn't exactly "tangled up" with their daughters. But, think whatever you want to think.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Admit it, you expect more from other boys, when it comes to your daughter, than you expect of your son's towards other girls.

You are bothered that your daughter's BF isn't showing up with flowers, but you didn't know your sons were dating and your first meeting with the GFs was them cuddling, your word, on the couch with your boys.

It's a valid question, if you walked in to find your daughter cuddling on the couch with a boy you've never met, how would you react?

You know you are not treating your daughter equal to your boys at her age.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Oh bull. I expect my boys to treat their girlfriends like gold. And, I have told their girlfriends just that. And, if my sons don't treat you well to kick them to the curb. Sheesh.

Spoken from someone who didn't have much clue as to what was going on in your own son's relationship. Maybe look in the mirror.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Ok - I have no kids, but when I was 14-15 we usually had group dates to movies. Or if a boy came over he sat for dinner. We could sits close on the sofa with pop-corn. Sometimes my Dad embarrassed me by joining us in his chair. I think your daughter is ok. Maybe dad or an older brother needs to have a chat but not a threatening one. You know your own kid. She seems to have her head on straight, right? It is just another mile stone.

Lindley · Guru

I remember my dad giving my first date the 3rd degree, He was to have me home at 10:30 or else. The kid had me home by 8 he was that scared. My dad didn't like him and it was later revealed he was right. Nobody messed with a big man with a Texan accent.

Lexxy · My dog name is Sasha, too!

Lindley wrote:
I remember my dad giving my first date the 3rd degree, He was to have me home at 10:30 or else. The kid had me home by 8 he was that scared. My dad didn't like him and it was later revealed he was right. Nobody messed with a big man with a Texan accent.

LOL, my dad did the whole country song cliche, sharpening his knife & saying bring her home sober. He was probably an ok guy from what I've heard. Haven't heard from him again smile

FNW · Guru

I don't remember my brother ever bringing a girl home. Even when he dated his high school sweetheart, he went to her house. We all knew her and loved her. Still do. She's a pharmacist and when I would visit Cali I'd go to the drugstore and see her. She broke my brother's heart, but I really like her. We're friends to this day on FB.

The first time he brought a "girl" around the family was when he took his (now wife) girlfriend to a family wedding. I knew she was the one just by the fact that he brought her. I teased that the first time she met us she met the entire extended family as well.

I think there standards are the same for boys and girls but the logistics are different. And that's because we may be equal, but we are not the same. And situations differ. And parents worry more about daughters getting raped, beaten etc., than boys getting raped by their female dates. But as a mother of boys, I worry about them getting someone pregnant. Not now, obviously, but some day.

Divine Geek · Guru

This thread just reminds me of one my favorite quotes from my dad:

"I'm pretty sure if someone needs their @ss kicked, you'll do it yourself, but call me of you need backup"

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Oh bull. I expect my boys to treat their girlfriends like gold. And, I have told their girlfriends just that. And, if my sons don't treat you well to kick them to the curb. Sheesh.

Spoken from someone who didn't have much clue as to what was going on in your own son's relationship. Maybe look in the mirror.

You have a double standard.

As for my son and his relationship, I met her their first date. Both were 18. They had a chaperone because that's what they decided they wanted.

And while there was a time when I had questions, they were not about how my son was treating her, but rather how she was treating him.

A year later and they still go out 1 day a week.

He dresses up, picks her up, greeting her parents, they spend the day shopping, seeing movies, hiking, having picnics, sight seeing, and he takes her home, speaks to her parents and says goodbye.

They usually still have a chaperone with them, their choice.

They are also planning to be married in the next 2-3 years.

So. When I look in the mirror, I see a mom who raised her kid right.

Lindley · Guru

I agree fnw, my worries about my son and daughter were different.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Oh you arent allowed to say that, lol.

Lindley · Guru

Idk, my son brought home a girl that drew my hackles, he only went out with her once but no way did I want him to date her. There are some sneaky girls too.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

I have different concerns about my kids, too.

Not because of their genders.

But because they are different people, with different needs, thoughts, and such.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Of course worries are different. But treating them completely differently in terms of freedoms is not the same as simply worrying.

Furthermore, my comments are more about the expectations of flowers and teddy bears to prove worthy of dating when you have no idea if your own sons bothered with that.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Well, my younger son is still with his first girlfriend and they are now sophomores in college and her parents adore him and vice versa. And, yes, I do know what he did, he did the whole grand promposal thing, flowers, etc. He does it now.
But, you have already made up your mind and wish to insert things that aren't true so help yourself.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Tuesday 5th of September 2017 07:39:53 AM

TrudyML · Guru

I started dating in Kindergarten!

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
Well, my younger son is still with his first girlfriend and they are now sophomores in college and her parents adore him and vice versa. And, yes, I do know what he did, he did the whole grand promposal thing, flowers, etc. He does it now.
But, you have already made up your mind and wish to insert things that aren't true so help yourself.

-- Edited by Lady Gaga Snerd on Tuesday 5th of September 2017 07:39:53 AM

That is absolutely false. I have only responded based upon what you posted. So the grand promposal was the first date? Then your comment about not knowing your boys were dating until you found them cuddling on the couch wasn't true? And this girlfriend he has now is the only girl he ever dated? You are purposefully be confusing.

But if you want to think the measure of a boy or a man is in buying teddy bears and flowers - have at it.

Lady Gaga Snerd · Guru

Yup, that's what I said. Uh huh.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
OK, some senior boy is calling on my 10th grade daughter. Where the hell are the flowers and teddy bears? Those better show up soon or your arse is getting kicked out of my house!

Yes, it is.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

Lady Gaga Snerd wrote:
FNW wrote:
Playing chess is fun, too. But I would like to see him make more of an effort. I do not think she is too young, but perhaps a double date with a friend?
He took her to lunch at Starbucks on a Sat. For a first date, i thought he should have showed up with a flower. So, he has already lost points with me.

And here.

Forever Sunshine · Guru

TrudyML wrote:
I started dating in Kindergarten!

Me too! The first of many! Little hussy that I was! biggrin

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Lindley wrote:
Idk, my son brought home a girl that drew my hackles, he only went out with her once but no way did I want him to date her. There are some sneaky girls too.

OMG yeah, won't go into detail but I sucked it up so DS wouldn't rebel.

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

TrudyML wrote:
I started dating in Kindergarten!

Me too. Us notherners start early. biggrin

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Lawyerlady wrote:
Of course worries are different. But treating them completely differently in terms of freedoms is not the same as simply worrying.

Furthermore, my comments are more about the expectations of flowers and teddy bears to prove worthy of dating when you have no idea if your own sons bothered with that.

DS has given his Gf and Moi gold dipped roses. And bears! biggrin

Lindley · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Idk, my son brought home a girl that drew my hackles, he only went out with her once but no way did I want him to date her. There are some sneaky girls too.
OMG yeah, won't go into detail but I sucked it up so DS wouldn't rebel.

It was hard but I too didn't say anything because first she was just a kid and I may be wrong so I didn't say anything to my son. He wasn't to interested in her as a girl friend either.

Lindley · Guru

My husband didn't bring me flowers or anything when we started dating. I never thought anything of it. He did buy me something for Christmas and my birthday though.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

My ex was always giving me gifts.

Flowers, candy, Doo dads, jewelry, STD.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

lilyofcourse wrote:
My ex was always giving me gifts.

Flowers, candy, Doo dads, jewelry, STD.

That's so funny even though it's not so funny.

lilyofcourse · My spirit animal is a pink flamingo.

Lawyerlady wrote:
lilyofcourse wrote:
My ex was always giving me gifts.

Flowers, candy, Doo dads, jewelry, STD.

That's so funny even though it's not so funny.

Yeah, gotta laugh or you'll cry.

Thankfully antibiotics was all I needed.

Well, and divorce.

Divine Geek · Guru

I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Idk, my son brought home a girl that drew my hackles, he only went out with her once but no way did I want him to date her. There are some sneaky girls too.
OMG yeah, won't go into detail but I sucked it up so DS wouldn't rebel.

evileye

I know what to do_sometimes · Frozen Sucks!

Divine Geek wrote:
I know what to do_sometimes wrote:
Lindley wrote:
Idk, my son brought home a girl that drew my hackles, he only went out with her once but no way did I want him to date her. There are some sneaky girls too.
OMG yeah, won't go into detail but I sucked it up so DS wouldn't rebel.

blankstare Not you.

Lawyerlady · On the bright side...... Christmas is coming! (Mod)

TrudyML · Guru

Forever Sunshine wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
I started dating in Kindergarten!
Me too! The first of many! Little hussy that I was!

Hussy!

Forever Sunshine · Guru

TrudyML wrote:
Forever Sunshine wrote:
TrudyML wrote:
I started dating in Kindergarten!
Me too! The first of many! Little hussy that I was!
Hussy!

Hahaha I freely admitted to that!