Here's the deal. If you haven't bothered to visit your dad in 20 years and you don't call, send a birthday card, or talk to him once in while - when it comes time for his will - he's not leaving you anything. He's going to leave it to the kid that helped take care of him, spent the holidays with him, brought him dinner, and loved on him.
So stop being a whiny baby. You got out of the relationship exactly what you put into it. It was his money, he did what he wanted with it. Stop blaming your sister.
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
My step-kids are going to be VERY
disappointed when my will is read.
They don't get a thing. My Church,
my Eastern Star chapter, and our
local Community Association are
the beneficiaries.
I remember watching a Dr. Phil episode. A daughter had brought her elderly father on because she said he was carelessly spending money and giving large sums to his son. It came down to she was mad because he was spending her inheritance. Dr. Phil said, "you know what your inheritance is called before your father dies? HIS MONEY!"
I never had to worry about that. When my dad died all went to mother; when she died there was almost nothing left for my brother and I to fight over. I think we each got $750.00 after everything was settled. Same when my brother died, he used up everything he had in expenses for care, so nothing to fight about.
Have no idea who I will leave what, if anything, I have when I die (if I go after my wife).
My mother was the greatest loser in this kind of will thing. She was left the major part of the estate (land, etc.) when her grandmother died and then the sons and daughter filed to "contest the will", if this is the correct term. Dragged on for 40 years with the lawyers and courts the biggest winners. When the smoke finally cleared she did get the "home place" but all the other farm land was gone to pay bills.....
I think all of this just demonstrates how important it is to have a will in place and be clear.
However, nobody is entitled to their parents money to inherit. And, if you inherit some, then count it as a blessing. However, in general I think that i would want my last act on earth to be simply leaving my money to my children in equal amounts, even if one of them is a dud. Regardless, it would be my last "i love you" and if one of them blows the money on stupid crap, oh well, not much you can do.
For me, I am the one who took care of my mom at the end of her life. I was with her every step of the way. And, I count that as my privilege. i was also in charge of my mom's estate. My sister lives several states away so she could not help. I didn't feel more entitled to her money because i took care of her. I did make sure however, that all the final bills were paid out of her estate before dividing up her accounts. And, even though the will said share and share alike, as the Executor, technically, i really could have divided it any way I saw fit according to my accountant and lawyer. Partly because some of her accounts were in my name, like an IRA, etc and those had different tax implications than other accounts. But, in reality, nobody is looking over the shoulder of the Executor, they can mostly do what they want to do, and the only recourse is for someone to contest that which is not an easy thing.
However, I made sure that it was an equal 50 50 split. And, the money was well spent as my niece will be graduating Pharmacy school in May! And, my portion is my accounts for my kids' college.
I have told my parents I don’t want an inheritance. I want them to enjoy their money. They worked hard for it, they should enjoy it. If they want to take a cruise around the world, go for it. My sister and I are more than capable of taking care of ourselves.
They keep calling. Three brothers. Dad left it all to their sister. I explained that she didn't know, but she was the one to take care of him, and the brothers had nothing to do with either of them for years. They expect her to share, anyway. But there really isn't that much. He left her his house, but it will have to be sold to pay the mortgage.
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
Is this a family member LL or one of your clients? At any rate, it really isn't their business if there is anything left or not, since the money was not left to them. Unfortunately, these kinds of things really seem to destroy families and it's sad.
Is this a family member LL or one of your clients? At any rate, it really isn't their business if there is anything left or not, since the money was not left to them. Unfortunately, these kinds of things really seem to destroy families and it's sad.
Apparently, this one wasn't good to begin with.
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LawyerLady
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.