DEAR ABBY: How do I gracefully ask a bridesmaid to step down? She has been extremely unhelpful and missed all the events in the planning of my wedding. The problem is, she has already bought her dress. What do I do in a situation like this? -- DRESS DILEMMA
DEAR DILEMMA: It depends. Ask yourself (calmly) what will you gain by asking her to step down, and what do you have to lose?
If you are considering it because you plan to replace her, the big day has already been planned and the events are over. Would her replacement be purely decorative? If you want to punish her, understand that because she has paid for her dress there will be hard feelings, and if she's a family member, there will be consequences later. (Frankly, if I were you, I wouldn't toss my bridal bouquet in her direction.)
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
Since when does a bride expect to have her bridesmaids help plan a wedding? My daughter didn’t and neither did any of her friends whom she served as a bridesmaid.
Since when does a bride expect to have her bridesmaids help plan a wedding? My daughter didn’t and neither did any of her friends whom she served as a bridesmaid.
Most of the comments revolved around "events" How many events did the the bride expect? And was this a budget buster for the bridal party?
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Sometimes you're the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug.
I'm glad my sister didn't do that to me. I was her maid of honor but she lives in Arizona and I live in Washington. Kind of hard to participate. It was the same when she was my maid of honor.
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Was it a bad day?
Or was it a bad five minutes that you milked all day?
There's a lot of info missing. How soon
before the wedding are we talking about?
Is there any way she can return the
dress? Or be credited if a (new) brides-
maid takes her place?
Back in the dark ages when I got married,
all my attendants needed to do was show
up, and fluff up my veil before we walked
down the aisle. My attendants were my
best friend (all the way on the other
coast), a former roommate, and my DF's
16 year old daughter. No way could any
of them help in planning our wedding.
We paid for all the bridesmaids dresses, shoes, and even plane tickets. Our Church gave her a shower and her maid of honor helped her on a few things and gave her a personal shower. I don't recall any of the brides acting like bridezellas, in any of the weddings she was a bridesmaid in.
I didn't buy the dresses, but I did find dresses that were easily worn again. Of course it was a backyard wedding, and the dresses were nice church dresses. They were on sale, too. I think they were about $30 each.
For my cousin's wedding, I had to wear a typical, 80s, southern, tee length, peach, satin, dress, with big, poofy sleeves, and a bow on the back. It was hideous, and $180.
Plus the shoes had to be dyed, and the hair had to be "sculpted". meaning it was so big I couldnt sit up properly in the car.
Caitlyn was a bridesmaid for our cousin, but she was too young for any of the events other than the shower. Her dress was $100 and she could wear what ever black shoes she wanted.
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A flock of flirting flamingos is pure, passionate, pink pandemonium-a frenetic flamingle-mangle-a discordant discotheque of delirious dancing, flamboyant feathers, and flamingo lingo.
